redbar.watch

episode: RED BAR RADIO S21 E04

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transcript

[0:00:00]   And now you're under my control[0:01:18]   Hello, hello, hello, hi.[0:01:26]   Hey, ball hog.[0:01:30]   Hey, ball hog. That's what Joe Rogan says to Tom Segura.[0:01:34]   Hey, ball hog. That was when ball hog came out, Tom Segura's special.[0:01:38]   He's got a new one. Slash hammer.[0:01:42]   That's how I open my show, telling you about Tom Segura's new special.[0:01:45]   Hi, how are you?[0:01:47]   Hey, Jules. How are you?[0:01:49]   I'm great. How are you?[0:01:51]   We also have Jules in the house. What's up? What's up?[0:01:53]   Jules in the house.[0:01:55]   This is going to be a very difficult podcast to do.[0:01:57]   Yes, yes, yes, yes, yes.[0:01:59]   How was your 4th of July summer?[0:02:01]   Did you have a good time?[0:02:03]   Did you have a good start to the beginning of the summer?[0:02:05]   It's pretty hot.[0:02:07]   Yeah, it's very hot.[0:02:09]   We went to one of those little stops on the way to the mountain on the 4th of July, rented a slingshot.[0:02:15]   Slingshot.[0:02:17]   You guys, have you visualized, can you visualize what a slingshot is?[0:02:22]   The slingshot Polaris.[0:02:26]   Pretty fucking cool. The slingshot Polaris.[0:02:28]   What a mistake that was.[0:02:30]   Oh, that was cool, man.[0:02:32]   We shot up the mountain. They had 110 degrees.[0:02:35]   No top. No AC.[0:02:37]   The heat from the big engine coming in.[0:02:40]   I had my shirt off.[0:02:42]   I was driving up the high, high...[0:02:44]   You're turning into like a shirt off kind of guy.[0:02:46]   Shirt off in public type of guy.[0:02:51]   Every time you take your shirt off in public, I can't quite believe what I'm seeing.[0:02:55]   Yeah, it's very...[0:02:56]   You must be turning into a whole new man.[0:02:58]   Yeah, but that got me very, very, very sick.[0:03:01]   I think I got heat poisoning there from being in the 110 degree weather with no cover, no water.[0:03:08]   We decided no water that day and we drove for four to six hours in the direct heat.[0:03:16]   It's very hot here.[0:03:19]   Does anybody even care about how much hotter it is here than where I'm from?[0:03:28]   I'm from Chicago. It's very cold there.[0:03:30]   Usually.[0:03:32]   And now we live here in the whole... Do you see what the whole summer is?[0:03:35]   I couldn't believe it. They said it was cool here.[0:03:37]   I didn't know it was going to be hot. I don't like the heat.[0:03:40]   I didn't know it was going to be hot here. We live in Tucson, Arizona.[0:03:44]   Look where that is on a map. Really look where that is.[0:03:48]   People are saying a slingshot is a $200 vehicle and I agree.[0:03:52]   Yeah, we were really disappointed that her friend told us they're so fast.[0:03:57]   We get in this thing, it's like...[0:03:59]   It was like driving the lawnmower.[0:04:07]   It only feels like you're going fast because of the blowing wind.[0:04:10]   And then you're like, wow, we're speeding down this thing.[0:04:13]   And then the slowest grandma passes.[0:04:16]   Everybody was pat on the mountain. I'm like, I could take these turns pretty fast.[0:04:19]   But then I see there's like trucks, minivans, like on my ass.[0:04:23]   I go, how could they make those turns?[0:04:25]   I like to do a turn.[0:04:27]   50 miles an hour.[0:04:30]   I'm afraid to tip. Doesn't matter what car I'm in, I'm afraid of tipping.[0:04:36]   I watch Jake Paul do these donuts in the parking lot. He's going fast.[0:04:40]   You see these people that could go fast and cut the wheel like that?[0:04:43]   It's my biggest fear.[0:04:45]   This is me making a turn. Full stop.[0:04:48]   Start turning the wheel like this with a lot of fear and anxieties.[0:04:53]   Then I press the gas just a tiny bit. I go, I can't. I take the key out of the ignition.[0:04:57]   I take a break.[0:04:59]   That slingshot scared the life out. I'm kidding. It was very boring.[0:05:03]   But you know what? It's fun driving up the mountain with no roof, which we already do in the Jeep.[0:05:09]   There's no difference.[0:05:11]   Do you like being covered with a thin layer of dirt?[0:05:14]   Yes. So we got covered in bugs and dirt.[0:05:19]   And I got sun poisoning.[0:05:22]   And I've been very nauseous ever since. I'm nauseous right now. I'm freezing cold.[0:05:28]   I feel like I have been permanently nauseous ever since that heat stroke we got.[0:05:33]   I got a watch band tan there, which is pretty cool.[0:05:35]   If I ever take off my watch, you could see my watch band tan line, of course, which is pretty cool.[0:05:41]   I got a new watch band here from a girl's site. What else? I got all this stuff here.[0:05:46]   Robin Tran says a Jew not wanting to tip, huh?[0:05:50]   Oh, that's offensive. So she's like an offensive person.[0:05:57]   Robin Tran, everybody coming off a big high.[0:06:02]   She announced she's not trans anymore. It was a bit to get up there.[0:06:08]   Yeah. So my Fourth of July was basically riding around endlessly in the heat up and down, up and down.[0:06:15]   We didn't want it. Then we got stuck in this thing where we had to take it all the way home. It was a mess.[0:06:20]   I didn't think any of this out. You know, how are we going to what are we going to do with it?[0:06:25]   We rented it for the day. We didn't realize it was going to be supposed to be back one p.m. the next day.[0:06:30]   And then after about three hours, we didn't know what to even do with ourselves except get violently sick.[0:06:37]   So, yeah, I feel like Tedros. I feel kind of like Tedros now.[0:06:43]   Guys, come on. Tedros from the idol. I put a little accent on that.[0:06:48]   Put some respect on it and his name with a little bit of an accent.[0:06:52]   Tedros. Tedros. Sorry, you disgusting Americans.[0:06:58]   Tedros, tortilla. You ever see a master chef?[0:07:04]   Chef Yaron. Have you seen him? He talks completely fine.[0:07:09]   And he's like, I really like what you did with the tortilla.[0:07:14]   That's how you saw Tedros. That's how I say Tedros. I feel like Tedros.[0:07:19]   It's in that episode, our final episode, episode five.[0:07:24]   Wow. And yeah, I feel like him with the two hair spritz coming.[0:07:30]   I should have done that today. Jules done two. We should have designed that here where two parts of my hair are coming out like this.[0:07:35]   You kind of got a little bit coming out, so it's close enough. Did anyone see there's a special episode of Red Bar?[0:07:40]   This is for all the guys who pay attention to all the little details, the Easter eggs that we hide around the set for you.[0:07:47]   Did anyone notice before Tedros has even introduced your life? I had.[0:07:52]   I'm not going to tell you what it is. It's something you got to guess throughout the day.[0:07:56]   I had something on my set here a couple months ago.[0:08:01]   That is the exact.[0:08:04]   Thing Tedros had in one of these episodes.[0:08:10]   I don't even know. I know. I know. Yep. Yep.[0:08:13]   People will figure it out. It's going to be exhilarating when they do.[0:08:17]   We've got an excellent Scars Club episode for everyone today.[0:08:22]   Oh, my God. This is a good one. This is a good one. We got some homegrown bust.[0:08:28]   Homegrown bust. We busted a guy, a big guy.[0:08:33]   Jules did this. Well, no, we didn't do this. Some guy on Reddit.[0:08:37]   I hear a little birdie told me about part of it, but part of it we saw a Reddit comment that led us to an investigation that we did.[0:08:46]   As far as we know, no one has done this investigation.[0:08:50]   And we've got a big homegrown with a little bit of Reddit help, some random guy on Reddit, some commoner.[0:08:57]   We'll give you credit. We'll give you credit. We're going to give him big credit and he's going to get a big payday today.[0:09:00]   So there's some random Reddit guy out there. He's doing his books and he's going to get a lot of money today just because of us.[0:09:08]   Thank you so much. And that's coming up today. Oh, this is going to be a good show.[0:09:12]   We watched the bear. Anybody. You know what? I'm since Tedros is gone.[0:09:18]   Guess who the next guy I'm going to try to be like is.[0:09:21]   Richie.[0:09:24]   You ever seen this Richie on the bear? You ever see how out of his mind he is? He's exhausted.[0:09:30]   I've met guys like that in Chicago. They're all exhausted and they're all screaming all day.[0:09:36]   Yep. That's exactly how my family was raised. I'm glad you guys saw the bear.[0:09:40]   That was basically showing you how I came up, how my life was, how my mom was exactly like that mom.[0:09:49]   We hate the bear. We find it to be pretty fucking stupid. If you actually like that show, you're out of your mind.[0:09:56]   Yeah. Well, why can I stop watching it? They're telling you to watch that show.[0:10:01]   People have been telling us you got to see the bear. We can't believe it.[0:10:04]   I that show has so many holes in it that they just nobody cares about the holes in these shows anymore.[0:10:09]   Have you seen platonic? It's because the bear, they just do whatever they want.[0:10:13]   Now, it's hard to pay attention to every second of the bear, probably because the writers are on strike with Adam Devine.[0:10:20]   And so I'm like, everything that happens, I'm like, I missed that.[0:10:24]   That right. The writers should not get paid a dime because they're just writing up these magical what ifs.[0:10:31]   They're not filling any of the holes anymore in these shows. They just go wherever they want to go and they just write it as they go.[0:10:37]   And remember when you used to think Lost had issues with it? Lost was tight compared to these shows.[0:10:43]   I love the bear. We're rewatching Lost today on the show. The whole fucking thing.[0:10:49]   I love the bear when they're running around and yelling. Love it. Best show.[0:10:53]   As soon as two people sit down to have a little five minute talk, then I'm like.[0:10:58]   I can't stand a show where two people are talking, especially if one of those people is black. Seriously.[0:11:04]   Really. They should limit how many things a black person could say within a show.[0:11:10]   I think Carmi is the most annoying. Like, I could care less. Don't say that word around me.[0:11:16]   We don't say that word. We could care less about Carmi. Carmelo. Love Richie. Love that uncle.[0:11:22]   OK, stop it. We don't like any of this shit. Don't listen to her. We don't like shows. OK, we're cooler than that.[0:11:28]   We're here to hate on shows. We don't like anything.[0:11:33]   I've got an amazing drinking song. I can't wait to get into the drinks today so we could get a party.[0:11:38]   Such a good drinking song for you to dance to. Yeah, I've got one here. And yeah, my stomach's pretty sick.[0:11:44]   Let's heal wounds together. Let's we hope everybody had a great start to their summer.[0:11:49]   I can't believe your summer just started. My summer has been infinite since January 1st. Never stops with the jam summer.[0:11:56]   We're going to have to move. I think within the next five years, it's going to be too hot.[0:12:00]   It's too hot. There's six restaurants in the whole city. I've been to each of them a billion times.[0:12:06]   I could reopen each one of these restaurants and they'd be a big success.[0:12:11]   It's that's how bad they are that I could reopen them with no work, no pre-production and I could relaunch these places.[0:12:18]   That's what that's. You shouldn't have to have relaunch fantasies every time you sit down to eat.[0:12:24]   Every restaurant I'm in, I'm going, oh, God, yes, I would love to.[0:12:29]   You know, I start going through a whole what's that bar rescue type of thing in my head. All right.[0:12:33]   We've got an excellent, excellent day. We should stop with the small talk. We should have that first drink.[0:12:38]   Let's get that song out. I don't think there's any video to this song. Oh, my God. Let me play. I've got it here.[0:12:43]   I got it, too. You've got it. All right. Blast that loud. Have a drink with me. Look at this.[0:12:48]   How about this? How about this?[0:12:54]   Welcome to Red Bar, everybody.[0:13:00]   How does this run like, Mr. David? How does this run like?[0:13:07]   All right. All right.[0:13:16]   Starting to feel things.[0:13:24]   One more. Have two with me. These are small.[0:13:31]   You like this scotch scotch.[0:13:39]   Cheers.[0:13:43]   She's a fun one.[0:13:48]   I want to spare us.[0:13:52]   Yes, it's a late one.[0:13:57]   Welcome to Red Bar, everybody. We're going to have a great time today. It's a Scars Club episode.[0:14:02]   Thank you for being Scars. S C A R S.[0:14:08]   Oh, yeah. Join the Scars Club. It's our only form of income.[0:14:13]   And we're really not doing well.[0:14:19]   Thank you for being a Scars Club member. It really is mandatory, although we ask.[0:14:25]   Don't email me if you're not a Scars Club member. I'm not there to help you with your RSS feed.[0:14:31]   Thank you. We've also got.[0:14:36]   I wanted to talk a little bit about our group on Facebook.[0:14:41]   We've been using Facebook for our show's group. And we got a little bit of a name change for that group.[0:14:47]   It used to be called the Bring Back Group. Then it was just called Red Bar Scars Club.[0:14:53]   Just like the show. Right. So we're introducing the new name of the group today.[0:14:59]   I'll have the banner up by tomorrow. But the new name of the group is officially the Leo Dominique Group.[0:15:07]   Yes. You guys been a Leo Dominique. It's high end.[0:15:12]   Do people know what we're talking about here? You probably heard Leo Dominique's name mentioned on the show.[0:15:19]   I've turned him into a goddamn designer brand. Welcome to Leo Dominique.[0:15:25]   The new Facebook group. Yes. I've been waiting all week to get into Leo Dominique.[0:15:31]   Yes. The hottest new store on Facebook.[0:15:36]   Now, why is it called the Leo Dominique Group? Well, I wish I had some more materials here to show you.[0:15:42]   But if you've been in the group for as many years as me, I'm not also I'm not trying to.[0:15:48]   They're saying ha ha ha. Oh, my God. We love I've been waiting for this.[0:15:52]   Ha ha ha. LOL. The Dominique in Republic.[0:15:57]   Dominique in Republic. Yes. Welcome to Leo Dominique.[0:16:02]   I would like to make some high end fashion Leo. I see him like Dolce and Gabbana like Leo Dominique.[0:16:10]   I'm wearing Leo Dominique right now. This is the new stuff from the Leo Dominique Summerline.[0:16:15]   My sister in a fight because she copied my Leo Dominique themed wedding. Yes.[0:16:20]   Which in Italy. Yes. In Italy. We had our wedding in Italy this week.[0:16:26]   And then her sister copied it. So I love how every post that he does.[0:16:32]   Well, let me explain it. People don't understand. People don't even know what I'm talking about yet.[0:16:36]   If you're not part of our group, please go ask to join. We'll see if Leo lets you in.[0:16:41]   But I've been in this group for 15 years. I've been in this group since I was a kid.[0:16:45]   Many of you have been in this group since you were a very young kid. And you've seen people come and go.[0:16:52]   You've seen Todd Detter used to be a big name in the group.[0:16:56]   Zander, of course. Zander is almost I don't know if Leo Dominique paid Zander to allow this,[0:17:03]   but Leo Dominique is the closest thing to a real life Tejos.[0:17:10]   Because Leo Dominique came in and within a week it's Leo's house.[0:17:16]   We've never met Leo. I couldn't tell you what he looks like.[0:17:20]   I know nothing about him, but almost every post in the bring back. Here's the weird part.[0:17:28]   It's been allowed and accepted by everybody. Just like how, you know,[0:17:33]   Tejos moves in and everything. OK, I guess this is just happening now.[0:17:38]   So this is we're a little concerned only because we don't know Leo.[0:17:44]   And now here, listen to this. Most of our lives now.[0:17:49]   You me drools is about Leo Dominique. And we didn't even know that.[0:17:54]   We wake up. Leo, should we see if we could prove this right now?[0:17:59]   I mean, it's all Leo Dominique and we don't really have a problem with it.[0:18:05]   That's the big one usually. OK. A new guy who's taking a new guy.[0:18:10]   I'm like, can you mute this guy? He's filling up the whole group. Leo Dominique, I wake up.[0:18:14]   I can't wait to hear what he has to say. I can't wait to see what Leo's found.[0:18:19]   A lot of people think Leo Dominique might be me because he posts all the same things that I have just looked at.[0:18:28]   You know, I'm always blown away. I go, is Leo reading my father's bookmark history?[0:18:36]   But this is what I'll say about Leo Dominique. I think we need to know more about Leo Dominique.[0:18:42]   We're not going to put him on the spot. We're not going to look into his past here on the show.[0:18:46]   But I think a full background check needs to be initiated. Yeah. Oh, yeah. No, I need to know.[0:18:53]   No, I'm sorry. I'm putting people's lives at risk. Four point two thousand people every morning are being exposed to Leo Dominique.[0:19:00]   I'm responsible, you know? And I can't believe everybody's just moved over.[0:19:09]   I mean, Zander just took a backseat to Leo Dominique like that. He recognizes real.[0:19:13]   Yeah. OK. What does Leo Dominique look like? Does he look like Leo Saki? Who's that guy?[0:19:19]   Leo that I love so much? Jules. I see your eyes going like this.[0:19:24]   Jules eyes like this in your hundreds. She's going like this. She's doing A.I.[0:19:28]   She's doing automated arrangement. I'm keeping. What is the name? Leo Scappi.[0:19:33]   Yes. That's what I hope he looks like. Does Leo Dominique wear a black tight tank top?[0:19:39]   A million silver pieces of jewelry, a million rings. That's kind of how I picked shaved head.[0:19:45]   Everything OK? Yeah. All right. Well, Leo Dominique, thank you for coming into our lives.[0:19:53]   And we will be temporarily for the summer at least renaming the group Leo Dominique, not the Leo Dominique group.[0:20:02]   This isn't a group. It's a high end store now. So thank you, Leo Dominique.[0:20:07]   People are saying they love Leo's posts. People love him feel better. They trust him. Does anyone know what he looks like?[0:20:13]   I think that he's earned. What is his what is his body type? What is his age?[0:20:19]   What is his frame? What is his voice sound like? You know, he caught our interest a few episodes back.[0:20:25]   You've heard me mention Leo Dominique before. Right. You've heard me talk about him.[0:20:30]   We don't know nothing about him. Leo, I'm dying to meet you. They're saying Leo stands for law enforcement officer.[0:20:37]   Well, I could see something like that happening, actually, now that you think about it. OK, Leo, you've been great.[0:20:43]   And we just wanted to make sure that everybody knows, you know, a lot of people might it could be a lot of people who feel pushed to the side because of you.[0:20:51]   A lot of people feel it not welcome. A lot of black people feeling really weird around.[0:20:56]   I think that he's been very accepted. I'm making all that up. I hope I wish that that was the case, but it's not.[0:21:03]   People like him. So welcome, Leo Dominique. I just wanted to give you a shout out because you've been such a big part of my life now.[0:21:10]   He's a big part of our lives. Will he? You know, usually guys like this, though.[0:21:16]   End up doing some big stunt. End up becoming, you know, I wouldn't get too close with this, Dominique.[0:21:23]   Has he been collecting you in groups and doing weird stuff? Has he done anything weird?[0:21:28]   No. Has Leo messaged you?[0:21:31]   You know, I saw a guy the other day going through our member list in the bringback group, looking for the girls, girl members.[0:21:40]   I saw a guy doing this. Well, I hope the guy had done this.[0:21:44]   He he made a post in the bringback group and he thought he was exposing a bot.[0:21:52]   He goes, man, this group kind of idiot allowed this obvious bot into the group just because it was like some girl with makeup on.[0:22:02]   So in his life, if there is a girl friend requesting you or if there is a girl on a profile pic and it's involved in his community on Facebook, it's got to be a bot.[0:22:13]   You see that guy? Turns out this girl wasn't a bot. She was a real person.[0:22:18]   There's lots of nice girls. And he had exposed and then I guess he's fighting with everyone. What's that guy's name? Does anyone know that guy's name?[0:22:24]   I don't know about that one. But, you know, I left a comment. I go, were you going through the member list?[0:22:30]   Open or looking through the girls pictures? Do you do that? I don't even do that on Instagram.[0:22:36]   I go to my followers list. You look, you hope you hope that there's that there's all hot chicks.[0:22:43]   No, I don't do stuff like that. I don't look through the girls accounts. I don't go through the girls pictures. There's a lot of people who do that.[0:22:50]   I bet if you're a girl and you join a revenge of the sis thing and Mersh sees that profile pic as a girl, a guy like that, he's going to click on that.[0:22:59]   If he's going to examine you, you're very safe here. We would never examine you. Although I got someone who I want to examine today.[0:23:07]   We have a famous actress who started following us today. I'm not going to say her name. Very excited about this.[0:23:18]   On Instagram. I got a message from her the other day. I haven't responded yet. This is a very famous up and coming actress. Isn't that what you told me she was?[0:23:27]   I guess. She's an actress and she's also friends with, no joke, one of my favorite actresses.[0:23:35]   Maybe we'll tell you who that is soon. I got to feel this out, but we do have a lot of famous people following us now.[0:23:43]   Did I show you the other week that Harley Moorenstein was following us from epic mealtime? Did you see that?[0:23:49]   Did I show people that I went to my Instagram? I couldn't believe my eyes. I opened it up. Harley Moorenstein likes your photo.[0:23:59]   I go, why? Seconds later, Mike, wake up. Harley Moorenstein follows you.[0:24:09]   You know, and we've made fun of it. We used to torture that guy. We used to watch his videos with, he used to do a lot of girlfriend hopping.[0:24:16]   Remember that guy? Harley Moorenstein from epic mealtime. He's had some tremendous ups and downs.[0:24:22]   He has had a lot of girlfriends and they did a lot of boyfriend and girlfriend vlogging together. Remember that?[0:24:29]   So when I saw him, he followed me. I go, Oh my God. I wonder if he knows all the stuff that we've thought about him.[0:24:35]   Of course he doesn't, but you know, we've thought tremendous things about him. So Harley, thank you. We're glad that you're here.[0:24:41]   Although I saw Harley was sticking up for iDubbbz. Did you see this? iDubbbz came out to let us know that creator clash.[0:24:51]   You know, creator clash with Anissa. It was all going to her father's charity. Remember this? Anissa. Anissa's poor Anissa.[0:25:00]   Do we know Anissa here? Why don't we do a rise and then we'll tell you about poor, poor Anissa. I drew a picture of her a couple of weeks ago.[0:25:07]   Oh, that came down. That's a shame. Let's do one of our patented rises here and we'll get into the big show.[0:25:17]   I got a lot of stuff. I want to talk to you guys. Yeah. Okay. Are we ready? We're doing it Jules.[0:25:22]   She's looking at screens. It makes me so nervous at the beginning of the show.[0:25:27]   I shouldn't have bought her so many screens. Girls shouldn't even be on the computer.[0:25:34]   You see, this is what you see.[0:25:39]   Pulling the levers. I bought four. I got all these. All right, let's do the damn rise here. Are you ready?[0:25:46]   We're good. One, two, three. You're not getting much communication. Yes, chef. Yes, chef. That's what I need.[0:25:53]   There we go.[0:26:01]   That's how I wake Jules up at the morning.[0:26:08]   Wake up.[0:26:17]   How's it looking?[0:26:20]   We're going to have to delete all the episodes soon. We got a cease and desist from Marvel over the use of this song last week.[0:26:26]   They said the only thing that we could do, Jules, remember this is to delete the episodes, right?[0:26:33]   No. Is everything OK? Because really, your eyes are glued to the monitor.[0:26:38]   I'm not going to lie. A couple of guys are saying the stream is not working, but there you go.[0:26:42]   See, I knew something was going on. I'm just trying to figure it out. It's fine.[0:26:47]   But look at that. So meanwhile, I'm sitting here. Oh, Mike's must be crazy. He's but people are saying the stream is not working.[0:26:54]   Is the stream working? Some people are saying it is. Well, that's a big problem if it's not.[0:26:59]   So, yeah, we should probably take a break if something like that's happening and then and then fix it. Right.[0:27:04]   Let's go to break. Throw me that break sign and we'll play a song and we'll fix the stream. We'll see what's going on.[0:27:10]   We'll be right back in Mo Man.[0:30:11]   Yeah, it's working now, they say, OK, Cameron says he should have fixed something.[0:30:25]   Thank you, Cameron. We should be good now. Something about poor people, he said.[0:30:31]   Thank you, Chad. You know what I wanted to say? We have one of the most well-behaved Chads in Chad history.[0:30:39]   Don't you think? Isn't our chat so nice? I mean, they're like, behave. Now, can you stop yelling at Jules?[0:30:44]   Can the chat just sit there? I want I need this woman here. Stop making my wife type.[0:30:52]   Stop taking my wife tonight from me. You're taking it from me.[0:30:59]   You're making me crazy, making me crazy. I could barely think. You're making me nuts.[0:31:05]   Thank you guys so much. We do have the most behaved chat. I wanted to thank our chat.[0:31:09]   That was something that I was thinking about in one of my many, many showers over the last 14 days is how great the chat is compared to most other chats.[0:31:17]   Have you seen Louis J Gomez's disgusting dirty chat? Have you seen how gross that is?[0:31:23]   I can't stay away from this chat because these guys are just too nice. Well, yeah, they're very nice.[0:31:27]   And that's the way we want to keep it. So if you see somebody practicing poor behavior in the chat, tell them, no, no, no.[0:31:34]   We want to use reverse peer pressure on those people. And we want to keep everybody as friendly as possible.[0:31:41]   Very nice. No complaints, no nothing. Just and you guys have been doing a great job.[0:31:47]   It really is one of the nicer chats out there. We really do a nicer job than all these other shows out there as far as that goes.[0:31:55]   So thank you very much. OK, so the problem is fixed. We had a small streaming problem. It's fixed.[0:32:00]   We're ready to look at the beautiful TV. Oh, I love TV. Oh, I love TV.[0:32:06]   I'm watching this thing. Twenty four hours a day. I can't get enough of TV and the things it shows me.[0:32:12]   What did I say? Yeah, I wanted to show you a quick iDubbbz thing. Remember iDubbbz and Anisha.[0:32:17]   Where are they on my list here today? They are in next up. Next up. Here they come.[0:32:23]   They're coming up. I saw this. I actually got the pleasure to see his son Pika cover this.[0:32:29]   He was very whiny about it. I immediately turned it off and threw it out myself.[0:32:34]   Listen to this. So remember Creator Clash, Anisa and iDubbbz.[0:32:40]   I drew that beautiful picture of Anisa. That's around here somewhere. I'd love to get that framed.[0:32:46]   Get that up soon. That paper towel. Beautiful portrait of Anisa. Here he is.[0:32:52]   Him and Anisa. They needed to raise money for charity. I can't tell you how much I despise charity.[0:32:59]   I'll tell you that. Really. Really. I'm so sick of it.[0:33:03]   I thought, you know, after COVID, after we've seen everything, after we see how everybody acts.[0:33:08]   I thought maybe we would grow out of charity by now. You know?[0:33:13]   But no, people still are blinded by this term charity.[0:33:18]   Where they want to raise money. Oh, they're going to get together. They're going to raise money for[0:33:23]   Alzheimer's. Some German Nazi fucking disease.[0:33:29]   And I guess Anisa's dad. He's walking around and I bet him and Anisa have gotten pretty close.[0:33:36]   You know, her dad. I know nothing about her dad. And I know nothing about Anisa.[0:33:41]   I'm not into iDubbbz or that whole universe. I barely know anything about it. But guess what?[0:33:47]   Anisa's 12 years old and two marshal be a whore. Nobody ever told her it's the wrong way.[0:33:56]   Anisa is the girl from Wrong Way. And her dad is sitting there with that fucking wife beater.[0:34:02]   He's touching her probably. It's all alleged in my own mind.[0:34:07]   But I bet Anisa and her dad have some sort of sexual. Are you allowed to say that?[0:34:13]   I bet someone did something. Or is that going to be followed with allegedly as well?[0:34:19]   You know, what's interesting, the people who say terrible things about me never say allegedly.[0:34:25]   That's what I've noticed. Have you noticed that, Jules? Oh, what was happening there?[0:34:30]   It wasn't recording the whole time? No. The whole time? I just started.[0:34:35]   But I even asked you. I go, are we recording? Cameron, will you make sure we have a DVR backup?[0:34:45]   That just cost me seven hours. That just cost me seven damn hours of work.[0:34:51]   Seriously, of editing, piecing things together, put things in two parts.[0:34:59]   Transcoding versus not transcoding.[0:35:06]   So this Anisa and her dad, I bet, are sexually doing stuff.[0:35:12]   Cameron, can we get verification, at least from Cameron, that we have a DVR copy and that's not going to be erased by something or something like that?[0:35:20]   I'm not putting up this show at all unless we have that intro. The intro is the most important part.[0:35:26]   That slingshot story. I know.[0:35:30]   So can I get confirmation? That's what I'm waiting for. Confirmation from Cameron, our web developer, just to make sure we're good.[0:35:36]   And then I could stop being violently angry.[0:35:41]   I'm going to need to pour myself another drink here while you could just leave the camera on me while they stare at me while I wait.[0:35:48]   Very upset. Very upset. But it's nobody's fault.[0:35:54]   Right? It's my fault. Nobody's fault. No, it's mine.[0:35:59]   OK, can I get this motherfucker's confirmation? He won't respond? What's he doing? He says yes, of course.[0:36:05]   Great. There. Cheers, everybody. Perfect fucking timing.[0:36:10]   Thank you. Thank you. I'll be fine. All right.[0:36:16]   Let's what you got to do here. And this is why we do this show to begin with. This is a great way to show you when something bad happens to you.[0:36:23]   OK. And it hurts you. Use that pain to hurt others.[0:36:30]   Hurt people. Hurt people. So now they're going to get an extra.[0:36:36]   And I was saying something great, I was saying that how come the people who say terrible things about me, Jules, you've heard these people.[0:36:43]   They never use the word allegedly. Do they think that I am not a litigious man?[0:36:50]   Do they think that I will just let things like that slide? Or do they know for sure that I have done these terrible, terrible, terrible things?[0:37:01]   Well, I don't know. I like to say allegedly about people. So when I say I bet Anissa and her fucking dad have some kind of twisted relationship.[0:37:10]   You know, where he's got stains on that wife beater.[0:37:15]   I could say that with great, great. What's the word I'm looking for? Great, great.[0:37:24]   That I don't know if that's the case at all. I don't know if that's the case, but I hope and I bet it's the case.[0:37:31]   All right. Take it away. I dubs. Tell us. Don't worry. This is much worse than us losing the first 15 minutes of the show.[0:37:37]   It's not lost. It's not lost. It's not even lost. Wait till you hear what he's really lost.[0:37:44]   Everyone, I have some bad news to share with you. This will make us feel better.[0:37:49]   I really don't want to share it. I feel terrible. This year has been a rough one, but this is the path that I chose.[0:37:59]   So I think it's best to be transparent for Creator Clash 2.[0:38:05]   You know, despite it being a fun event and despite good fights and a lot of creators sacrificing a lot of time, money and energy.[0:38:14]   We lost two hundred fifty thousand dollars on the event.[0:38:20]   I was screaming. I was dying. I was in the shower. I was screaming so loud.[0:38:27]   I couldn't wait to bust out of there, wrap that towel around, fall down the stairs and show jewels.[0:38:33]   Finally opened my laptop at the bottom of the stairs, all crumbled into a pretzel shower.[0:38:38]   And I press play and you heard what you heard. They lost two hundred and fifty thousand dollars on the boxing event.[0:38:46]   I couldn't be happier. And that means that no money went to charity.[0:38:53]   Yes, they're two hundred and fifty in the hole, leaving zero dollars for the charities, the Alzheimer's charities with Anissa's dad.[0:39:03]   Now, where is Anissa? I don't see her in any of these videos.[0:39:06]   Let's get lewd, bitch. Start stripping.[0:39:09]   It's time to start taking off those clothes so that you could pay back the charities because this is stolen money.[0:39:17]   As far as I'm concerned. Oh, how convenient.[0:39:21]   They lost money so they can't pay the charities. Let's hear them out.[0:39:26]   This typically works for anyone who's unaware is that once our expenses are paid off for the event,[0:39:33]   like all the minimums of like broadcasting, I want an event that actually all goes to charity.[0:39:39]   As soon as the ticket comes in, it is then sent to the charity. I don't want the.[0:39:44]   And then the event can do the event if they have any money left over.[0:39:48]   How about that? Because I bought my ticket and it wasn't. Hey, let's hope everyone buys enough tickets and the charity will get paid.[0:39:56]   It said your ticket. One hundred percent of the profits go to charity.[0:40:00]   Well, I bought a ticket and my profits, my ticket has not gone to charity.[0:40:06]   I could file a chargeback for this, which I love doing.[0:40:12]   And I would suggest that anybody who bought a ticket to this event file that chargeback, file that chargeback.[0:40:20]   Your money did not go to chair. I really wanted to fix this brain disease that Anissa's dad has.[0:40:27]   Let's hear him out. The hotel travel, all that sort of stuff.[0:40:32]   Once that's all paid off, then we can start paying the charities.[0:40:37]   Unfortunately, we didn't even reach the break even point. Right.[0:40:41]   We're two hundred fifty thousand dollars in the red. I foolishly thought that the success of.[0:40:48]   Hassan was playing this in the chat was, you know, kind of laughing and Hassan was getting so mad at his check.[0:40:54]   What are you guys doing? You know how hard it is to run an event?[0:40:59]   Why are you guys saying you should have done this? All of a sudden you're all busy. It's like, yeah, you should have.[0:41:03]   He can't run an event. He doesn't know what he's doing. We should all be excited about this.[0:41:07]   We should be so excited that the charities didn't get.[0:41:10]   And again, who has tricked you into thinking, oh, the chair wants the charities get the money.[0:41:16]   Everything's going to be great. Has anything ever good come out of a charity?[0:41:22]   Please stop with the charities right now. I wish there was a way to extract money from good, hard working charities.[0:41:29]   I wish your would should be a minimum, you know, a minimum for what we are able to do this year.[0:41:36]   And that wasn't true. There was a lot more to think about.[0:41:40]   I thought, OK, you know, we're we're bringing on more talent.[0:41:44]   We're bringing on more creators that should train. Nobody cared about those.[0:41:49]   We're inviting more creator guests. I think nobody knew pay per view buys.[0:41:55]   This is our second time doing the event. So more.[0:41:58]   Remember, everybody threw this throughout this whole thing. Everybody's been hating him.[0:42:02]   He's been in fight after fight with everybody.[0:42:04]   But this a nice everybody going after a nice all the same height stuff and now this on top of it.[0:42:11]   So what does he do? And this made me so mad.[0:42:14]   He launched a charity stream where he sat there for 24 hours straight on July 4th.[0:42:22]   He's going to raise money for charity now.[0:42:25]   Surprisingly, the goal. This is what I don't understand. The new goal that they need to raise money.[0:42:32]   So remember, they did this event.[0:42:34]   They're two hundred and fifty thousand dollars in the hole, which means they lost two hundred and fifty thousand dollars regardless of the charities.[0:42:42]   But their goal. For this new fundraiser, they're doing so that the charities could get money is two hundred and fifty thousand dollars.[0:42:52]   Why would it be? That's just how much you lost.[0:42:55]   So I'm assuming. You're doing this fundraiser now and you're just going to give the charity two hundred and fifty thousand dollars that you're trying to raise right now, just because you lost two hundred and fifty.[0:43:11]   Why not just try to raise fifty thousand dollars for charity to make up for it?[0:43:17]   I know. Isn't that why two fifty that you lost?[0:43:19]   Yeah. So I'm very confused because it seems like he's actually doing this new fundraiser stream right now just to get the two fifty that they lost.[0:43:29]   I don't know. I don't like to accuse people and stuff like that. I'm sure that can't be the case.[0:43:33]   I mean, with these two. Right. These guys love charity.[0:43:37]   I'm going to be doing a charity stream on Twitch where you guys can donate because I fucked up the stream this morning.[0:43:45]   Let's not talk about that. Let's not remind Mike about that stream mess up, OK?[0:43:52]   Because by the end of the show, I want to be able to forget about that completely and not even address you about that. I'm going to pretend that never happened.[0:44:00]   I deserve it.[0:44:02]   No, no, no. I'm a big pretender. As far as being really nice goes, a lot of people don't know this about me. I'm really, really nice.[0:44:12]   So when stuff like that goes wrong, I go, oh, I'm shaking.[0:44:21]   Don't worry about it. I'm not going to do anything. I'm going to forget about that. I'm going to be so drunk and happy by the end of the show.[0:44:26]   You actually could get more mad at me when I fuck things up like that.[0:44:29]   Well, then you just sit there and do the right thing. And oh, you're saying I could actually get more mad at you, but I usually don't.[0:44:38]   And you never because how horrible would that be? I mean, you come in here, you do this.[0:44:43]   It's all this is on your shoulders and you screw up this man show that he's been doing for 20 years like that.[0:44:48]   That's a lot of pressure. A man like me to come in here and screw up a man like my show.[0:44:56]   That would be very scary. A lot of people would be very scared.[0:44:59]   I was just so excited to see my guys in the chat. I was so excited. I fucked it up. I just feel terrible.[0:45:06]   Yep. You made some real big mistakes. It's actually fine. I don't I don't care about any of that.[0:45:13]   I love the bonus work that I'll be doing tonight is fun.[0:45:17]   This is actually better because then you'll have the DVR like right after the show instead of after waiting.[0:45:22]   No, it's not better because that DVR, you know, and maybe Cameron could fix this.[0:45:27]   In the meantime, that DVR is a little choppy for me. OK, the DVR.[0:45:32]   I didn't want to say anything because everybody's been working so hard. It's not perfect for me.[0:45:37]   That frame rate is a little off to me. The DVR is like this. Hey, everybody.[0:45:41]   It is me, Mike. Hi, how are you to me?[0:45:45]   I know maybe some other people might not notice, but that DVR is a little choppy to me.[0:45:51]   Frame rate wise and the uploaded show is in a very high quality.[0:45:55]   That's a much higher quality. That's the quality that I want people to see.[0:45:59]   They deserve very high quality, like 30 minutes at the beginning.[0:46:03]   It's a long time. That's a long time. The rest in the perfect. That's a whole Jeff FM interview.[0:46:10]   No, I actually don't care. But don't bring it up again. I'm sorry. Because then I'll start thinking about it.[0:46:15]   Yeah. Don't puke. It's all going to be OK.[0:46:19]   And this is a good lesson for everybody sitting at home. How do you handle a big catastrophe while you're live and sick?[0:46:27]   And you just just go like this. I owe you. I owe you. I owe you. I'll do a huge thing.[0:46:33]   No, no, no. I don't need any else. Just just shut up about it. And that's the best thing you could do.[0:46:40]   Right now. So that, yes, the harsh reality of creator clash, they did not raise the money.[0:46:46]   Let's see if we're going to know about it. So I thought that would translate to pay-per-view buys.[0:46:51]   But we did as well as we did the first year. Fifty thousand compared to one hundred thousand the first year.[0:46:57]   Well, look at that. So fifty thousand people bought the pay-per-view. A hundred thousand bought it last year.[0:47:03]   They just thought it would just keep growing. That's what people think, that it's just going to be bigger than it was last time.[0:47:09]   But nobody really cared this time. You know, fifty thousand buys. I guess it's a lot.[0:47:14]   There's a lot of people promoting it. You know, forty four different fighters, all with audiences of one million or more.[0:47:23]   Fifty thousand. That's all that came out. Now, where's Anissa? Because I want Anissa to address me now.[0:47:29]   I bought a ticket. So right now you just have my money and it's not going to charity.[0:47:34]   So I'm pretty involved at this point.[0:47:37]   Oh, I was wrong and I feel a lot of shame because a lot of people were trusting me and trusting our team to, you know.[0:47:50]   Protect the event and protect the charities and protect just the whole thing.[0:47:55]   There was an edit. It feels bad because this isn't like a regular business where it's all a personal loss and I can just be like, oh, OK, I suck at business.[0:48:05]   And I got away from it. All the other fighters were, you know, hoping that their charities got represented and got supported for all their hard work.[0:48:15]   But we didn't have any anti piracy measures. We weren't prepared to deal with what ended up happening.[0:48:21]   I mean, I was for me, I was just thinking, like, let's just avoid catastrophe.[0:48:26]   As long as there's like not like.[0:48:29]   So is this what you do as a creator now? You would you make videos addressing problems that you're having?[0:48:36]   I mean, that really is your content now. What videos does this guy even make?[0:48:41]   Every video he makes is I am deeply sorry and ashamed for the person I have become.[0:48:47]   That's not a show. You know, it's really it's crazy. What's his next video?[0:48:52]   Was it going to be about addressing some? Anissa and her father had a baby.[0:49:01]   So where is Anissa? Why isn't she putting up ludes? Why isn't she just counting her only fans today?[0:49:08]   Why isn't she doing a striptease? We'll never know. One of their bodies is doing a little striptease.[0:49:14]   A woman with a lot of tenacity. I'm about to show you a woman with great tenacity.[0:49:25]   She and up next. Who's the woman with great tenacity?[0:49:31]   All that I'm waiting for my note to load. But you could think about this in the meantime, tenacity.[0:49:40]   Right. It's a word that I thought of this morning right before showing you this.[0:49:44]   My pictures are all cut off here. We're just waiting for them to load.[0:49:49]   But think about that. Yes. Tenacity. Tenacity. Who's got tenacity? Can anybody guess?[0:49:54]   Let's see. Is it coming through? OK, finally. Ladies and gentlemen, the woman of my dreams showing some great tenacity.[0:50:05]   Yep, it's Hela Klein. Look at that. This is a real photo. Can we see this?[0:50:12]   Hela Klein decided to get dressed up like Avatar. Wear this giant the mask, Jim Carrey, the mask, zoot suit top.[0:50:25]   And then you scroll down here. She's got no pants on.[0:50:30]   Now she has pants. She's no pants you've ever seen before.[0:50:36]   Yeah. There is a big missing portion of the back of the pant here and then covering her beautiful, delicious, tiny.[0:50:52]   Little ass is a metal covering, sculpted, shaped like two tiny boys.[0:51:03]   But gee, I've never seen anything like this pig made. I'm blown away. This was like the sub for me.[0:51:08]   I could not stop. I looked at five times an hour. Here is you. I'll show you what led up to this.[0:51:14]   This is how I saw these pictures. So I was awoken by Jules.[0:51:19]   She goes, Mike, you've got to see these pictures. And she shows me this. And I go, oh, OK.[0:51:26]   And then she skips to the next one. Goes like this. Oh, OK.[0:51:31]   He was doing this while she's gluing beads all over her face. She's decorated like a cake.[0:51:37]   OK. She goes, Mike, keep looking. Shows me this one. Oh, there she is. I like this one, too.[0:51:42]   So she had a little assistant here put on these silk gloves to do some real creep.[0:51:48]   I mean, guys, this is the stuff that five years ago I was going,[0:51:52]   what if Hila Klein was like a fashion model and did like all these nude?[0:51:57]   Like that was like a huge, crazy fantasy. What if? Fun time.[0:52:03]   Mind experiment I was doing. And now this is here. This is every morning I get to wake up here.[0:52:09]   I'll show you. So then it kept going. And we're looking through the slide show.[0:52:15]   Yeah, here's another one of her head. I go, OK, OK, what's going she goes, are you ready? And I go, yep.[0:52:20]   And then tenacity. I couldn't believe it.[0:52:25]   And the way they got this big zoot suit go and making her shoulders look so big.[0:52:29]   It makes her I hate to say I mean, I can't believe we're looking at Hila's[0:52:35]   Oz. I mean, maybe the British the Oz pronunciation is the part that I can't get over.[0:52:41]   Is that string coming out? There is a string coming down.[0:52:46]   Yeah. From her, I guess. What do you call that? The pussy.[0:52:51]   The vagina, the hole. Yeah. There's a string coming out.[0:52:56]   And then there's two hands coming. I don't know why they needed the hands. I think it would have. That's a bit amateur.[0:53:01]   The hands. Yeah. So this thing and we'll show you, we've got some why don't we send over her blog is already the shiny.[0:53:07]   But I don't think that it needs the impact. Yes. I mean, Hila be an assless.[0:53:14]   Pantsless. That's huge. That's really all you need. Yeah. There's the shock. But why the hands?[0:53:20]   You know, the hands made me think that this but armor is like a piece that they're holding up to her bare butt.[0:53:29]   Right. What did you say? It's like two people are holding this up because you would just fall.[0:53:34]   Right. Wrong. This spot armor is attached. She didn't need the two hands.[0:53:39]   So there it is. You can kind of see right here. What is this here?[0:53:45]   That's nudity to me. That's no different than showing the whole body.[0:53:51]   See this line elective scene in the butt. Also, it's just like your studio.[0:53:56]   And yeah, it's just the empty studio. They probably even edited out a guy, you know, using the magic toolbox tool.[0:54:04]   Bunch of A.I. But there it is. It's a very small.[0:54:10]   I love that. The only one with a smaller ass in there. Me.[0:54:17]   I'm the only guy in town with a smaller took us and he'll a client. Just kidding.[0:54:22]   My ass is fucking huge. It would never fit in this very small.[0:54:27]   This is almost a child's Balenciaga ass cover thing.[0:54:33]   Yeah. This is the ass covering shield of a child.[0:54:37]   Many people on earth who could wear this. There's not many people who would want to wear it.[0:54:41]   I mean, Lil Nas X, Lil Nas X could wear this. Yes. Perfect for him.[0:54:47]   But that's like the only person. Imagine his shiny black booty looking like two hard apples right in there.[0:54:55]   Let's go to the video. Let's see some video footage. Did you know that he has been vlogging?[0:55:00]   The vlogs are I mean, really, when they come in, when you see him in your sub box, it's something else.[0:55:06]   And they told her to start doing longer vlogs. So guess what?[0:55:12]   She still talks like a complete imbecile, too. I can't believe she hasn't fixed up her the way she talks.[0:55:18]   Oh, here it comes. Here's Sheila's vlog. Do we have a time stamp for that?[0:55:25]   Oh, my God. Oh, yeah. She's getting dressed up by you.[0:55:29]   You guessed it. Guy probably drinks what? Bud Light.[0:55:34]   Her makeup artist is one of culture's enemies right now, of course.[0:55:42]   Bud Light drinking, guys. You do know the Bud Light thing. That was just a promotion on one can.[0:55:49]   Wasn't even sent out to the public. The can was only sent to that one woman as a joke.[0:55:54]   To prank her. She showed it. The world turned.[0:55:59]   They're still talking about Bud Light. They can't believe it. I won't drink it either.[0:56:04]   I've quit all beer because of this. Did you know that? Well, oh, yeah.[0:56:09]   I'm very aggravated about this. I want every beer company to lose all their stocks.[0:56:15]   That's what I'm into. That's all I think about. So here.[0:56:20]   Yes, she's getting her makeup done by this. And remember, these are not.[0:56:24]   Here's what's so great about Hela Vlogs. Every week, it's a crazy Vogue style photo shoot.[0:56:31]   Cover shoot. Right? For Hela Klein. Every week on her vlog, it's a new shoot.[0:56:37]   She's not been hired by anybody. She's not taking pictures for Teddy Fresh.[0:56:42]   She's not taking pictures of her own clothes. These aren't clothes that she's modeling for Teddy Fresh.[0:56:47]   She's simply going to stores. Renting dresses to play dress up with.[0:56:54]   And then putting on five hundred thousand dollar photo shoot for fun.[0:57:00]   In this video, she was sitting there and she goes, this is my happy place. Maybe I could find that scene.[0:57:06]   This is my happy place. It's like this shouldn't be your happy place. So she really likes just getting tended to.[0:57:12]   Six minutes in. Oh, you remember that, huh? I just looked it up. That's just my happy place. Every word.[0:57:18]   Look at this. This is so crazy. Not all of this. This is just a rich wife who's got nothing better to do.[0:57:25]   She could be hanging out with her kids, teaching her kids the whole the whole language from Israel.[0:57:31]   Instead, she wants to spend all day, 24 hours in a chair.[0:57:36]   Getting done up prosthetics, the whole avatar thing, hiring top photographers from these big magazines.[0:57:45]   This is no joke. All just for her, just for her Instagram. Just as a fun. That's kind of weird.[0:57:52]   I think you've got to keep reminding people that this is all self-funded. None of this is because it's a project.[0:57:59]   None of it. I mean, you know, people are probably assume on Instagram all these girls, they're doing it because it's some project.[0:58:05]   They're just showing you the pictures they took this weekend. Now she thinks she's Trisha or she thinks she's Trisha Paytas here.[0:58:13]   Certainly. It's literally life becoming art. This is my happy place.[0:58:23]   This is my happy place. This shouldn't be. Imagine being in a goddamn makeup chair.[0:58:30]   That's your happy place. It's the worst place in this whole studio when I'm in hair and makeup with the trannies all over me, crawling all over my skin like worms.[0:58:39]   You should see how these trannies try to fucking feel me up while I'm in hair and makeup here.[0:58:44]   That's my worst part of the show. If it weren't for hair and makeup, I'd do this show every day.[0:58:49]   It's the damn four hours of hair and makeup that make me sick.[0:58:54]   And those damn trans people, they they grow their nails out super long just for me because they know I hate the sound of their nails on my guy glasses.[0:59:04]   And they sit there and they draw on me and click, click, click, click, click, click. I go, I can't see.[0:59:12]   I grab their hands. They start screaming. Yeah, I've got the same two makeup artists work for me here, too.[0:59:19]   I couldn't believe it when they showed up on Hela's stream.[0:59:22]   Life becoming art. This is my happy place.[0:59:29]   Wait. Are you allowed to shoot Hela Klein through the fucking head?[0:59:35]   You're not is the answer to that one. You're not you're not allowed to shoot anybody or harm anybody.[0:59:40]   Keep your hands off people. All right. Let's show you that. What was the the butt here?[0:59:46]   We'll show you the butt. Here she is getting ready for the big day. Yeah, I really don't want to ruin it.[0:59:53]   This is so stupid. If you ever start doing this, Jules. Glue everywhere.[1:00:07]   And what does this guy steal from your fucking pocketbook while you're all taking pictures?[1:00:12]   That's the one thing people you know, if you're going to talk about trans people all day, talk about stuff that they probably do, like steal.[1:00:21]   Don't you think like gay people steal from rich people's wallets and stuff? That's what I think.[1:00:26]   Nobody talks about like that. I feel like gay guys, once everybody's on set and shooting, they're like, what can I grab here? Sticky fingers.[1:00:38]   I think that is probably to me. I, I think all trans people steal.[1:00:45]   Like, uh, but like, yeah, like klepto 20 bucks here, 50, 50. Right.[1:00:54]   I wouldn't trust this person now. And they, they all give them so much trust. Like they'll give them the key. Oh, here's the keys.[1:01:01]   You could open up, close up for us. You don't know this guy, but just because it's a makeup artist, you think you could trust a makeup artist with the world?[1:01:09]   I think all makeup artists are stealing. They're recording. They're probably recording everything you say and, and, and collecting a file on everything you've done in case they need to use that or extort you.[1:01:21]   They're taken from the staff. They're taking a microphone, taking a light. Yep. That's what I would do if I were trans. Who's going to stop you?[1:01:33]   Uh, okay. Let's see. And by the way, uh, Hela Klein's is trans. Sorry. Prove that you're not prove you're not. It's up to you to prove you're not. That's a good one to do.[1:01:46]   You just say somebody is trans, you know, get them to sue you for defamation. It's the burden is on them to prove that they're not. They'd have to strip down in front of the whole court.[1:01:56]   Imagine that Hela Klein butt naked in court. It's worth it. Okay. Let's see her try on this metal ass.[1:02:03]   You would see this happening on a shoot.[1:02:08]   Oh, they're pecking each other's nose.[1:02:15]   I don't trust you.[1:02:23]   Okay. Here she goes. She's getting the photos. See this whole operation. She's paying for this.[1:02:31]   Do you think Ethan starting to get mad that every week it's like two to $300,000 gone from his bank account every week?[1:02:41]   And at first it was, yeah, have fun. Have fun. That money is going to pile up. I mean, really, it's like a million a year spent on privileged photo shoots for no reason.[1:02:52]   It's a lot of money.[1:03:03]   There it is. Look. So these are the hands, the hands of God helping her out. And there's that little ass.[1:03:10]   I mean, wouldn't you think this was Jeffree Star if you saw this first?[1:03:14]   Ooh. And they hate her too. They've been collecting so much data, so much data on Hela Klein. They know, they know this is going to be, I can't wait till they all turn now, but she wearing a little thong here.[1:03:27]   It looks like it. They edit that, that out. I thought you were full naked with the full hole opened up.[1:03:36]   There's very little cheek, you know, you could probably see it. She could walk around and see in her hole.[1:03:42]   Like if she's just standing up straight, you see the hole, the hole, like she doesn't have enough ass meat to cover her own, the hole.[1:03:52]   Ooh. To me, that is nothing grosser than that little fucking thing. Oh, I can't wait to see what's going to happen next because this is her splashiest photo shoot yet.[1:04:03]   She's just going farther and farther folks. I know. Yeah. Next week she could, she might do a full artistic nude.[1:04:11]   One day we might open the Instagram and it could be she's completely naked.[1:04:17]   She might do a full nude. She might, cause she's getting all these fans go, you're amazing. You're amazing queen Hela sleigh.[1:04:24]   She thinks sleigh is like the newest word.[1:04:28]   That's how she said she might get it in her head in a couple of weeks that it's time to go full nude.[1:04:37]   I could see her doing a thing like Cindy Crawford, naked and rolling stone, completely black and white, just standing there naked.[1:04:44]   You know, thinking that that's art, that that's modeling. This could be great. I can't wait to see what happens next.[1:04:51]   Oh, look, they're holding her butt. Shooting her with a leaf blower right in the ass.[1:04:57]   Look at this.[1:05:02]   It's so wild. I just can't believe we've got this. It's a wrap girls. Great job.[1:05:09]   Might as well just throw the photos down the toilet. Go back one click and then pause when I say so. Okay.[1:05:17]   Pause. I just wanted to see if you get a different, but I know. Yeah. Trust me. I've been staring at that all night.[1:05:26]   There's that's where the bud is. It goes out pretty big. Goes out pretty big. Well, I got more in there.[1:05:33]   No, no, no. Hers is see where this line is. That's where her ass falls. Oh, she's got a stinky on ironic.[1:05:41]   Nothing back stairs. You're allowed to comment on that. I think when they're doing modeling, that's what modeling is fashion.[1:05:48]   It's fashion. Well, there, there she goes. Hela Klein, everybody. Can you believe we're getting this stuff?[1:05:53]   I can't wait to see what's coming. I can't believe it. She's such a fucking real. Remember, everybody?[1:05:58]   She's such a fucking retard. No other show will sit around and just call that woman a retard and zoom in on her.[1:06:06]   But no one else will do it. There she was. I couldn't believe it. Just couldn't believe it.[1:06:13]   Jam-packed show actually today. I can't wait for this bust. I really can't wait for the big bust that we've got today.[1:06:20]   Again, nobody has it. This is going to be clipped. Hopefully the Clippers could weigh. Yeah. How about this Clippers?[1:06:27]   Please wait till the real copy of the show is uploaded, not the DVR. Okay.[1:06:34]   Because after the show, the DVR is going to be uploaded. You're all going to rip from it. It's going to be janky.[1:06:40]   Now our system, we have it all. We have a guy and they're told if any of the clips are janky, pixelated, moving like this,[1:06:50]   that they're going to be completely strike and they're going to strike your other videos and say that they were red bar videos to get your channel fully down.[1:06:57]   These are the guys we work with. That's just what they do. They go, Mike, we're going to lie. We're going to strike.[1:07:02]   We're going to take down these people's channel. I say, please don't only if they're slightly pixelated.[1:07:08]   So please wait till the full version is up. So that means no clips for two days after this show.[1:07:14]   So you got to wait two days. Now I'll allow one. I'll tell you when that's coming up.[1:07:20]   I'll tell you what the one I'm going to allow to be clipped before the two day pending period. Okay.[1:07:27]   Can the Clippers all agree on that? Now the Clippers, I got some real special coming up for all our Clippers this year.[1:07:34]   Yeah. Oh yes. We've got some very nice coming up for our Clippers to show you our appreciation.[1:07:41]   Look at that for your work this year. Those Clippers are going to be leaving with a little bit.[1:07:47]   You'll see Clippers. You're going to love this. So stay on our good side here.[1:07:51]   Clippers because you're going to want to coming up very soon. Okay. What should we do here at the beginning?[1:07:58]   This is the beginning of the show. The worst. This is just the beginning. So let us know. Where should we go?[1:08:04]   Okay. You go. No, no, no. Go ahead. I'm just going to do this as a cute little one that I like. Yeah.[1:08:09]   And next up. Okay. Let's see what it is. Oh yeah. This was pretty bad. I didn't like this one.[1:08:18]   This is kind of similar to what I caught Dana Carvey. What's the name? David Spade. David Spade.[1:08:24]   Do we have any background music here? I wanted to do this little one before we get into it here.[1:08:30]   Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. Welcome to red bar album with me. This is number four.[1:08:36]   You're today before. Keep them light. Thank you.[1:08:44]   There we go. Caught this one here on Instagram. Do you guys know Lauren Savon?[1:08:50]   You might remember she's this old lady that Gavin used to pal around with. I'll show you her Instagram.[1:08:57]   Do you remember this woman? We've caught her doing some unbelievable things. You've seen this woman around, right?[1:09:04]   From the Gavin days. Some, uh, writer woman that he used to pal around with.[1:09:11]   She used to go on Bill Schultz's show morning with Bill Schultz. Remember this girl, Lauren Savon.[1:09:17]   She's been on the show a couple of times. We used to bust her, uh, for lewd acts on Instagram.[1:09:23]   We used to catch her doing this thing. You know, she's an older woman. She's probably about 45 years old, right?[1:09:29]   I mean, how old do you think she is? Maybe you could even Google her age. She's an older woman.[1:09:35]   And I caught her doing this thing. 45. Really? Yeah, you were right.[1:09:41]   That's not good. She probably doesn't think she looks 45. That's what I thought you were. Look at that.[1:09:46]   I caught her doing this thing years ago where she would go to a model's Instagram page and screenshot like all the goofy modeling pics that the 20 year old girls were doing.[1:09:58]   And then she would make sarcastic captions. She would post them on her story and it would be like a girl like making an apple pie in a bake shop in a bikini, you know, like a photo shoot.[1:10:11]   And she'd be like, oh yeah, just, just making an apple pie in a bikini like all women do. And I'd be like, that's not a good look.[1:10:22]   It's like, yes, these pictures are just, no one's taking them literal. We're not, she has a problem with Pearl.[1:10:31]   Yeah. Yeah. She probably does. I can't believe how Pearl guys give it up for Pearl. I grew up with Pearl. I grew up with Pearl. Have we talked about Pearl on the show yet?[1:10:42]   Sweeping the nation. And it's so funny because Pearl is like completely fucking stupid, but everybody is paying attention to Pearl as if their life depends as if Pearl knows something they don't.[1:10:58]   You don't got to pay attention to Pearl. You don't got to worry about what Pearl is saying.[1:11:06]   I love her. She'll tweet something like, she can't even believe that you guys are concerned. She'll tweet something like women are hot at 25 and ugly at 35 and even like conservative women.[1:11:17]   You'll see 40 year old conservative woman. Who's all on Twitter all day, tweeting all of that shit. And they'll be like, well, Pearl actually I'm 35 and I am still.[1:11:27]   She triggers all that Pearl really triggers. It's like Pearl fucking disgusting looking. I mean, Pearl's body goes like this. It's like, Ooh, imagine holding Pearl by the fucking waist.[1:11:40]   Imagine undressing Pearl and holding her by that wide pale waist with those disgusting tits. She's never been fucked. Pearl's never been kissed. You don't got to get caught up in arguments with Pearl about what it takes to be a woman.[1:12:02]   But man, do I love it. Every conservative woman cannot help. She's crushing it. I mean, guys, that to me is the dumbest thing, but yes, I bet you, you are reading Pearl and going.[1:12:17]   We caught Lauren Savant doing something else here today. This is what we caught her doing. This is pretty bad. Tim Dylan, Tom Segura and what's his name?[1:12:31]   Dr. Drew Pinsky. Here's Tim Dylan looking great. That's the best Tim Dylan's ever looked. He looks very happy. Here's Tom Segura lying. What did you lie about today? Ball hog. We'll get to him in a minute, but I found this picture. They're in New York.[1:12:52]   It's a Tim Dylan, Dr. Drew Pinsky and Tom Segura. They're out to dinner and I'm scrolling through this. I'm going, okay, look at these guys. Very funny. And then I see Lauren Savant here, idiot Savant.[1:13:07]   And she tags Dr. Drew and she says, Dr. Drew, you're dead to me for not letting me tag along to this. You see that there? Can we see that with all those bottles? You're dead to me for not letting me tag along to this.[1:13:22]   And I went, Oh, and it gets even better. Look at this. Dr. Drew responds. This is what's so good about stuff like that. Yeah. Look at this. Dr. Drew responds. And he goes in New York. She lives in LA.[1:13:41]   In New York, I was supposed to invite you to a dinner with Tom Segura and Tim Dylan. Why? Why would I ever do that? You're one of the 10 million people I know. You're not very high up on the list. Are you trying to let people know that you know me?[1:14:02]   She kind of thought she could leave that comment and the people would be like, Oh, Lauren Savant's best friends with Dr. Drew, Tom Segura. She can hang out with them anytime that she wants.[1:14:10]   You're dead to me for not letting me tag along to this, which is not something she didn't tag along with Dr. Drew to anything. I love how you said that in New York. Even Dr. Drew was sickened by your desperate attempt for clout at 45.[1:14:28]   We see you. Hopefully other people understand why that's in. Look at her. I mean, look at this. Look how pathetic that is. You thought you were going to tag along with the Tim Dylan on Tom Segura's big release day. They're going to invite you. Why?[1:14:46]   Because you once met Dr. Everybody in the industry has once met Dr. Drew and has a full on relationship with the man. Did you know that he knows everybody and he remembers everybody and they all have a big back and forth. They've all talked to him for 16 hours at a time.[1:15:06]   That was very pathetic. Lauren. Goodbye. Follow her harasser. I am restricted by her. I went to respond to that comment to show, you know, kind of like David Spade. We wanted to humiliate her. I went to respond to that comment. I'm not allowed to tag her. So she's got some restrictions on me. Huh? What did I do?[1:15:29]   What must have I, I have done. What, what must I had done to her in the past to make her restrict me like that? Well, get in there. Let's see. Make fun of the old woman. I like bothering the old cringe lady on Instagram. Did you guys see threads?[1:15:49]   We're using threads. We've been using it every day. We love the community around threads. We've been posting and just kidding. You will not be using threads. I made the announcement very right away because this threads opened up. Of course, the Twitter competitor.[1:16:09]   I like how everybody just calls. When I think of Instagram, I don't think of Mark Zuckerberg. And I don't want you thinking that either. When you think of Instagram, you should think of models, awesome guys, Shaq, Dwayne, the rock Johnson, you know, the community. Don't think of Mark Zuckerberg. That's Facebook. Instagram is cool. Instagram is hat. Instagram is like going on vacation to a real rich place to me. I'm not sure where you follow on Instagram.[1:16:39]   Bunch of sacks of shit from Ohio. That's not what Instagram is about. In fact, I've deleted everybody who doesn't live by a warm climate on my Instagram. It's not what it's for. So I don't think of Mark Zuckerberg. No. When I think of Instagram, I think of babes, models, babies, hot pieces of a tips.[1:17:02]   I think all that kind of stuff. They opened up their own Twitter, a nice, calm, safe Twitter for the people who don't want to be talking about trans activists, trans rights, and all that terrible stuff that you see them argue about on Twitter all day. I mean, think about this. A lot of people don't want to be in the Josh Denny universe of arguing on Twitter all day and that tacky, disgusting navy blue. It's time.[1:17:32]   It's time to get out of that blue. That blue of Twitter is like Tim Dylan's main polo shirt. You know, it's stained. It's icky. It's been washed too many times. That's a bad blue. Threads is beautifully clean like my shirt. It's white. It's wrinkle free.[1:17:48]   I had to post immediately because I know our listeners get jerked around a lot. We had a listener the other day. He traveled many miles because a fake red bar account told him he won a prize. This poor guy, he traveled across the whole country. He got there. They dumped slime on his head. They dumped feces and diarrhea from the sewer all over him and said, it's a prank bitch. You fucking idiot.[1:18:13]   And of course we have to always clean up the mess, take the blame and, uh, pay for the hospital bills and stuff like that. So we had to make an announcement that this is our threads page, the same one as our Instagram account, which is of course the only thing that you can do right now. But we've seen people get tricked. We will not be using threads, which is what I posted. I posted a screenshot. Here's our threads.[1:18:40]   In case you're getting any impostures, you know, it's a new community. And then I said, by the way, we won't be using threads. It is a public place like Twitter type of place. And we're not into that type of thing. I see people, lame threads is gay. Why are you using threads? I ain't using threads. That's what I came here to tell you. I couldn't believe it. I saw some guy, lame. This is gay, Mike. Threads is gay. I'm not on threads.[1:19:12]   You know, Jules gets all excited thinking that we're going to be on threads like the Klein's. No, I'm just joking. I'm joking. You weren't the one. I said, uh, no, no, no. You were all excited. You're like, I'm going to get, no, no, no, no. She's joking. She joke. Don't even say that. Cause that goes against my old philosophy. No, don't say that. Don't say that. Cause they'll take you seriously there. Threads sucks. You go on there and it's like a post from Cheetos and some like dumb ass bitch being like, follow my art page.[1:19:42]   What did we got here? The rolling stone. Oh, look at this. Yeah. Uh, here's my statement on it's pretty good statement. Um, people like me, they don't even realize this. They shouldn't be on a place like Twitter. Okay. That is a public space. I've always said this Twitter is like going to the mall, go into the town square and then yelling your most personal opinions to everybody out there when I'm at the mall. This is me. Hello. Hello. Hi. Yeah.[1:20:11]   Thank you very much. Thank you. Yes. Yes. I'm an angel.[1:20:15]   I walked through that mall, quiet, respectful. I'm not screaming. I'm not making fun of everybody. I'm not telling everybody how it is. It's a public place. Twitter is a public place.[1:20:27]   So it blows my mind to see people like Josh Denny and all these, uh, uh, attention seekers screaming at the top of their lungs, getting into all day arguments in public on Twitter. It's very embarrassing. It's not meant. I mean, you say one thing on Twitter, now it's taken out of your hands and it's put in front of audiences that were never meant to see you.[1:20:49]   You know, the reason red bar gets away with so much is because we respect the public's right to not be offended 24 hours a day. This is what these free speech guys got wrong. You can say whatever you want. You can do whatever you want.[1:21:06]   Don't throw it in these people's faces. You hate when they throw it in your faces. Remember the Bud Light? They threw that in your face. They put it in the can, right? That was enough for you to go nuts.[1:21:16]   You got to take down this poor beer company. I hope you're watching platonic so you could see how hard it is to run a beer company. Okay. That's a doc about Bud Light basically.[1:21:28]   So, uh, yeah, you got to respect people's right to not want to hear you're none. Okay. You're crap. Your sense. You're disgusting. You're disgusteries. And people just refuse to do that. They think, I got to say this stuff and everybody needs to hear it.[1:21:47]   Every single from a 10 year old Chinese girl to a 68 year old black woman needs to hear my thoughts. That's not the way it should go. We do a private show, not intended for the public.[1:22:00]   So Twitter is a public space. Threads is a public space, meaning, uh, just go there. You behave okay. You act like you're in public. So we will not be using threads or any threads or Twitter like substance, uh, ever. Okay. That's how we stay out of trouble. If you're not on Twitter, you can't get into any trouble.[1:22:24]   It's pretty much, that's pretty much it. I mean, the only people who ever get in trouble are people who are on Twitter because it allows people to, uh, well, here's a chance for people to sink their teeth into you, you know, and if you're using Twitter and you're on there every day, then they know your behaviors. So if they call you out, you're right there. You got to say something you're now mixed in with them, stay away.[1:22:48]   Uh, and that's what I do. And that's what we will always do. And we will never be threading. So that really bothered me how many people thought I was joining threads. I couldn't believe that. Okay. Thank you. Thank you. But I'll show you this.[1:23:04]   People are dying. Look at this. Chris Delia and Dane Cook are the front page of this story. It says, just disgraced comedians are looking for a second chance on thread.[1:23:19]   Look at that. And why is Dane Cook a disgraced comedian next to a, uh, alleged rapist, Chris Delia? Why? Why? Oh, cause he had a young girlfriend once. Oh, okay. Yeah. You're disgraced, bro. I totally forgot about that. I thought we all hated Dane Cook cause he was cringe, but it's because he dated a young girl.[1:23:44]   Disgracement as Chris. Well, there's a lot of things to be disgraced about. He's really pathetic. They get them too. You could like personally mess with Dane Cook and ruin his evening. If you want it's he's that accessible. You could ruin his evening tonight. If you want it to that's how easy.[1:24:03]   Because he Photoshopped himself in a pic with the dead. Yeah. Remember that when you thought you were pulling the wool over our eyes with that picture of Marvel. Remember when Stan Lee, I'm so glad. I wonder what Stan Lee's remains look like today. Oh, you know what I want to mention before we, uh, get into this. Here's, I've got a statement for everybody. You can cut to me. Here's a statement.[1:24:27]   I hereby hope that more Roseanne videos get deleted unfairly from YouTube. Sorry. That's what I've been praying for. Every day I go to bed, I go, dear God, please.[1:24:52]   And I always wondered, is crossing your fingers during the prayer negate the prayer? Is it at a boost? Dear God, please remove a, let YouTube remove a Roseanne video unfairly from YouTube. I love that. I love when something like that happens. So yeah, I'm not, sorry guys. I'm not part of the community. It's like, that's bullshit, man. That's bullshit. Such bullshit, man. Whatever happened to freedom of speech, man?[1:25:19]   I got freedom of speech. I, I, I just can't complain. I've got the best freedom of speech that I've ever had. And nobody comes after me. Nobody messes with me. So I say, let's start reporting every Roseanne clip you see. Okay. Maths, bot it up. Report it. I want that woman's career destroyed. Okay.[1:25:40]   She gets so pissed. She gets so pissed. They all get really down. Well, I hope that Roseanne really screws up that whole comedy mothership somehow for Joe. Cause she really is a dark cloud of bad luck. I don't know if they know what they're messing with there. Now Roseanne never does anything right. She's never, she thought she's never done anything wrong. I'm not one of these people who think Roseanne is out of line.[1:26:07]   She's just fucking stupid. She's just dumb as shit. How come nobody could say that? They're like, Roseanne's not racist. She's just severely so, so stupid and cringe. You know, Roseanne is not cool. Let's stop pretending she's cool. Just because she dares to say Obama.[1:26:28]   Disgraced comedians are looking for a second chance on threads. The latest rival already seems to be attracting performers in need of a rebrand, including Chris D'Elia and Dane Cook.[1:26:39]   Wow. And then we looked at some of Chris D'Elia's threads. He's out there. He's excited to be back on threads. Okay. I'm on threads. Now remember what happened to Chris last time he tried to tweet.[1:26:51]   Do we have that? Yep. Look, this was Chris's last attempt at publicly. Chris went off Twitter when his whole scandal first broke. Yeah. He disappeared for like two years. And then when the Will Smith and Chris Rock slap happened, everyone was going crazy about that on Twitter. And he thought that he could sneak back on Twitter that day.[1:27:12]   He thought he goes, I've done my time. Everybody loves me. I'm selling out these shows now. I could probably dip my toes back into Twitter and everything will be cool now. Right? So he wrote Hollywood is insane. LOL.[1:27:26]   And then immediately after tweeting this, everybody started going, aren't you a pedophile? What the fuck? You think you can show your face here? And then he deleted it immediately and then never went back.[1:27:36]   Yes. He deleted this tweet immediately. Cause thousands of people were calling him a petrifile. And then he never came back. But here he is on threads. Okay. I'm on threads. He says, and this is what the people say. Okay. Now leave, read the room, get off threads. Don't remember that time. You realize that people could save Snapchats. People love this one.[1:28:03]   People love this one. I wish they would remind the public of some of the worst ones. People are very bad at reminding the public on the exact things that we should be focusing on with these canceled guys.[1:28:20]   You got to think of the worst thing they did. The top three worst things in only push those things. Don't talk about any of the ones that could be argued. Start with pedophile. Start there. That's the one no one will could argue. Right? Pedophile stuff. Start there. Always remind people now, like even a guy like me, I don't know what Chris has done.[1:28:40]   I can't remember. Uh, but I'm sure it's very, very bad. We've got some crystal Leah stuff today. That's going to scare you. It's going to really bother you when you see what he's been doing with our buddy, George Jenko coming up today. So good. He was bullied off threads. I can't wait till threads turns into a dark place.[1:29:01]   I was so excited. I kept refreshing threads. I go, who's going to be the first person to just start fighting, you know? Cause there was like a day that went by. There were no fights on threads. I don't know if anyone's even tried yet. I think Ethan Klein was the first one to really start aggravating people. Once again, it started out pretty tame. Everyone was being pretty friendly. Hello. Hi.[1:29:24]   And it was pretty gnarly because it's like, uh, now you're all like on Twitter with all your Instagram people and you know, you're following all these people on Instagram. Maybe they're all following you, but it's not really a community. You're not really sharing your opinions with these people on a daily basis. And now you open this up. Now, like I'm seeing all the models talking.[1:29:50]   I don't know if I want to see models really talking and stuff like that. It's not like I go out to Twitter and follow all the models from Instagram. It's horrible on there. So I can't wait to see, I can't wait till it gets dark. I want, you know, cause Ethan and Hila Klein think this is a nice safe space for them.[1:30:06]   I'll show you some of their tweets. They're having a great or their threads. Of course, they're having a great time on there. Here's Ethan Klein.[1:30:14]   What's the rate limit on threads by the way, Elon Musk, dork ass fucking bitch, dumb ass loser could have fed every homeless person and paid for every college tuition, but instead blew 44 billion on an app. That's going to be with zero pretty soon. What a fucking idiot.[1:30:32]   Jesus. Slam like for real thread user hour. Who the fuck up? Okay. L-O-O cry harder, bitch.[1:30:44]   Okay. So he's going after Elon him and Hila like Elon because Ethan's so exactly. So now, you know, we hated Elon Musk since the Tesla. We've hated him because of the car. We hated him because of the car. This car came out the ugliest car I've ever seen.[1:31:01]   Have you seen the Tesla in its maroon color? Is that not the most hideous car you've ever seen it? And he actually got people to buy it because it had a computer screen in it. They liked the big touch screen that really blew people's minds.[1:31:18]   Remember that that's what got this car off the ground. People saw this car and they go, I love this. Oh my God. Look at the whole center console is a screen. I can't believe it. Screens are so cool.[1:31:29]   Screens are cheap. I don't like screens. What did I see that just had screens all over it? And I go, it looked, Oh yeah. Casinos. I was watching, you know, I haven't been to Vegas in quite some time.[1:31:42]   Quite some time. And in my mind's eye, in my mind's eye, I think I like Vegas, but you know what? I think I probably hate Vegas. I watched a video about Vegas. Who is this Shia Mada?[1:31:54]   Sophia Nygaard. We went to a real hotel in Las Vegas and stayed at all their hotels to see what, do people know who this woman is? She's pretty popular. She's like the Lauren Southern of Geekus. She's got brown hair. She's a big fucking obese person.[1:32:15]   She's a nice family YouTuber. I watched this video where it's this couple, this geek fucking couple, and they go to every Las Vegas hotel on the strip within two weeks. So three hotels a night, three hotels a day, and they stay at the third hotel they visit. They stay overnight. Okay. But they went to every hotel on the Las Vegas strip. So we watched this video. It was two hours long.[1:32:43]   We literally went home. And it's brand new. She went to every hotel on the strip. They were all disgusting. Not one hotel would I have stayed at. They all look terrible. And every casino floor looked terrible. And I noticed every slot machine. I used to be a big fan of slot machines. Not the game. Not the winnings. No. But of the look.[1:33:10]   Yep. I like a metal handcrafted cool machine, a vintage machine, a coin operated machine. I like a coin operated machine. Not anymore. Every slot machine in Vegas is just a screen with every color in the world shining through. I realized this about colored lights as well.[1:33:35]   You can't just shine colored lights on things. Colored lights have to come from some sort of object, some sort of mechanical object that has colored lighting. And then you want the colored lighting to kind of bounce off onto your property. But you don't want to be just setting up a, there's a colored light shining against the wall. That kind of looks cheap.[1:33:57]   And that's what Las Vegas looks like now. It's a bunch of colored lights, which I thought I liked. And guess what? I did like colored lights when they were being reflected off of neon signs, when they were coming from these big, beautiful vintage signs, right? The color from the light, it would bounce off. It would look nice. But now everything is just, you know, everything is just Phillips you know, I've never been to Vegas ever.[1:34:27]   But you might not be watching this video. It makes me think that Vegas is just like being in an airport.[1:34:32]   Yeah, Vegas. It looks like you're in a really cheap mall, a really cheap, gross airport. Even the nicest food you see in Vegas, knowing that you could get so much of it kind of makes it gross.[1:34:45]   But all of the restaurants have like an airport vibe where they're like inside of a mall hallway.[1:34:50]   I go, if I were the commissioner, cause the Vegas, the guy who runs Vegas is a commissioner, okay?[1:34:56]   Do you know my future self is in the bear? That fat Chicago uncle named uncle Chicago from the bear? That's me.[1:35:06]   That's the best guy.[1:35:07]   Looks just like me. That's what I look like when I get out of the shower.[1:35:11]   People are saying it's so similar to an airport.[1:35:14]   Yeah, it's disgusting.[1:35:15]   That's the point.[1:35:16]   And again, none of the slot machines have a face anymore. It's just a screen, a bunch of colored lights, a bunch of kitty looking things all over it. And it's ruined the look of a casino. It doesn't look cool anymore.[1:35:27]   You walk in and it's just screens.[1:35:30]   But they have the screens now.[1:35:31]   Screens are cheap.[1:35:32]   What?[1:35:33]   The sphere now.[1:35:34]   The sphere, which it also looks very cheap. They told us, remember this big sphere they're building. It's supposed to be a state of the art.[1:35:43]   This is in Las Vegas. You've probably seen it on your Instagram this week. They finally lit up the sphere. Is that what it's called? The sphere?[1:35:50]   I feel like they had a thing called the sphere before the stratosphere.[1:35:54]   The MSG sphere.[1:35:56]   The stratosphere is already a hotel. Now you're opening up the sphere. I think you're talking about, I'm meeting my friends at the stratosphere. They go meet me at the sphere.[1:36:04]   Buy tickets to the sphere.[1:36:06]   I'm up at the stratosphere.[1:36:08]   That's what I thought they were doing a short for.[1:36:10]   But they've built this big round auditorium for you two.[1:36:15]   It's going to be mostly just you two.[1:36:17]   Hello. Hello. Hiya. Please don't go vertigo with me.[1:36:22]   I don't like you two.[1:36:24]   Too many effects. This is you two.[1:36:26]   They plug in all their instruments and mics into effects pedals and they turn every knob all the way high.[1:36:34]   They turn their reverb as high as it goes on everything like this. They turn all the guitars, all the drums, reverb, all the way up to a place that you shouldn't even be playing around with.[1:36:44]   Then they just start playing and it's just delay and reverb and you think it's a shod.[1:36:49]   That's my dad's favorite band so watch it.[1:36:52]   They only have to do a couple notes at the beginning and then once that loop starts going with the delay and the reverb, it kind of carries it. They don't really have to play much throughout the whole concert.[1:37:01]   Hello. Hello. Hiya.[1:37:04]   I never liked that stuff, but they're opening the sphere. They're opening up this big sphere and I saw this documentary, this interview that they did with Bono and he's walking us through that.[1:37:16]   He goes, this is a state of the art experience. Outside is all LED screens. The clearest screens you've ever seen.[1:37:24]   There is clear is real life. And then I see the screens on opening day. Each pixel must be the size of a tennis ball. It's the oldest looking LED.[1:37:36]   I think that what he was talking about was the inside screen.[1:37:40]   Guess what? Why not use the same screen on the outside?[1:37:43]   It's not weather proof.[1:37:44]   Well, I'm sorry. It already looks dated. They're showing me a basketball. All I'm seeing and everybody who's filming it, you're seeing that LED. You're seeing the dots. Big time.[1:37:57]   Maybe you could pull up a video. You could find one on YouTube of that new sphere. You can see the LED beads. That's my biggest nightmare.[1:38:06]   This is why I can't use Phillips shoe. This is why I don't use what's called rope lighting.[1:38:11]   Oh, that ruined Christmas rope lighting. You ever see rope lighting when someone decides they're going to outline their whole Christmas house with rope lighting and you could see each individual LED circle through the rope.[1:38:27]   That's my biggest nightmare. That's my biggest nightmare. You got to cover that with an opaque, opaque LED tubing so that I don't see the balls.[1:38:37]   If I see the individual LED balls instead of a neon looking tube, I get furious. And that whole panel is, looks like I'm at a cheap concert.[1:38:49]   You know, it looks like I'm at Lollapalooza. Oh, there's the LED screen. Oh, look at the dots. That drove me nuts. I don't want to see dots and it looks like crap. Everybody's filming it and it's making all sorts of artifacts. I thought this was going to look clear as the eye.[1:39:04]   I'm looking at it in this video and it looks pretty cool.[1:39:07]   I'm looking for videos because I need, you don't send me a video that doesn't prove my point. Here's one by I'm sure when I show it through your screen, it's going to look like the next slide for the video.[1:39:20]   So here's this thing. We're talking about this giant ball. See, I can see the artifacting here. That's not pure black. That's not O L E D to me. See this, this haze, this crap is pixelated.[1:39:31]   Tear it down. Hey, do you want to come see the big pixelated 480p ball that we built? You told me this was going to be clearer than the naked eye. Is this what the vision pro is going to be? Wait, I might be messing this up with the vision pro.[1:39:47]   I'm thinking they saying the vision pro is going to be clear. Oh, okay. You guys are good. We're still good.[1:39:55]   I'm thinking vision pro it's a vision pro going to be big chunky LEDs. Okay. I think, you know what? I watched the video about this.[1:40:06]   And then I watched the vision pro where they say it's as clear as life. So this is not as clear as life. I'm not interested in things unless they're clear as life.[1:40:15]   Is that a good part of my personality? This stickler for pixels. Here it is. This is what you get to see. I hope it causes car accidents. There's a highway right by it. And they're all like this. Yeah, look at the dome.[1:40:31]   So there it is inside. They said though, that the music is going to be like nothing you've ever heard. It's a pure liminal space with 360 degree music, right?[1:40:41]   It's going to be the best place for a concert. Too bad. It's going to be only U2 for years. How long has U2 been there? They have a five to eight year, just U2 all day, every day.[1:40:54]   I don't know any U2 songs except for that hella hella. So there it is. And it does other things. It becomes the eye, which is gross. It becomes a gory surgery video scene.[1:41:08]   Seriously. I saw them playing surgery videos on this where they're showing, you know, those gory scenes that they show you every time.[1:41:16]   Dr. Linder's Instagram. Dr. Stuart Linder operating on someone's open cans. Oh yeah. Here's the eye one. Yeah. So very cool. What did we say about the sphere though? Why did we bring that up?[1:41:29]   You were talking about how Vegas are cheap. I think you were talking about Tesla's before that. Put my ass in a Tesla. Here's the eye. I guess it's, Oh, here's a spinning thing. I don't like these graphics. No a pumpkin. Ooh, that's cool. That looks real.[1:41:45]   That looks like a real American. Oh, look at that. Now that's what I'm talking about. The earth, the moon. Come on. Nope. See, oh, artifacting, artifacting. Start over. Two down. It's just the iPhone camera. Yes. If that happens in real life, I'm asking the commissioner for my trip money back. Look at that.[1:42:09]   Oh, the eye. I guess that's kind of cool, but will it get me to go to Vegas? Yes. I don't think I could do it. Has anyone been to Vegas lately? Are there any cool hotels that are actually good? We shot every hotel room. It looked really disgusting. Really bad. I mean, I couldn't believe the state of the rooms. The $79 deals.[1:42:32]   But there wasn't, at least according to Sophia's video, there's not even that much of a difference between like an $80 room and a $300 room. No, they were really bad. Really bad. Are there hotels maybe off the strip that are high end? I mean, they showed like the most high end hotels on the strip and they were very whack. Well, cause what can you do? They start building these things 20 years ago, right?[1:42:56]   You build the latest hotel is 15 years old. You build it all. You pick out all the furniture 20 years ago, right? And then you decorate 8,000 rooms. And then what are you going to do? You can't really update that. So you're stuck with all this dark wood and maroon paint. And then over here is like a goldish yellow color that they love. Really? It's like 20 year old colors. It really spooks me. I don't think I could go there.[1:43:24]   Uh, yeah, here's Hela Klein too. Um, threads. Elon Irony must, must be shitting and pissing right now. Am I right?[1:43:36]   She thought this was going to bring down Elon. So yeah, that's what Jules was saying. Now we're back on rooting for Elon mud because the Klein's are just too against him. So we can't be on the Klein's side of anything, right?[1:43:52]   And now we're forced to be back on Elon's side. And again, I started hating him long ago, long before all your censorship stuff that you guys love so much. I know you guys love censorship and all that stuff that's going on out there.[1:44:06]   Uh, but yes, I hated him for that. Tesla is one of the ugliest cars. I can't believe we're even considering it. I'm so happy that other people have started making electric cars. It really who's going to buy a Tesla now, right? That's like a gay car.[1:44:20]   You'd have to be gay driving around with those clouds on your license plate, pulling over, chatting, talking about how many miles you're going to get for the road trip, how many stops you're going to take. It's pretty cool.[1:44:33]   People love a little car. We have these things on the side of our Jeep that are like water.[1:44:37]   Oh, this kills me. I'm going to have to take those off gas cans for when you go camping for like extra gas and water. And literally every time you pull the car over, there's like some guy standing right outside the car. And then he's like, Hey man, what are those things?[1:44:51]   And they know what they are. So they're red gas tanks that are on the side, hooked on by a couple of trail racks, little things. They're called roto packs. We've got water on one side, gas on the other side. When you go off road and you fill these things up, then you have extra.[1:45:08]   Every time I get out of the car, some 50 year old asshole, he's a change. Where did you get? There's just roto pack in it. So the white is what water and the red must be. Yeah. They're for gas.[1:45:26]   Gas. Yes. Every time, every time. And it's like, they don't even have anything planned to ask me, you know, what the tanks are, you know, what the, what do you think a big red tank on the side of some off-road vehicle is? What must that be? A big plastic red, same color red that you see every gas canister that you've ever seen in your whole life.[1:45:51]   It looks just like that. It says gas. Why do you think you're going to talk to me about it? What do you think is going to happen that I'm going to invite you into my life? I can't stand when people talk to us about the car. I got fast food workers. I'll get this one too, where the little Mexican kid leans out the window to look at the Jeep.[1:46:12]   Damn man. That's a nice Jeep. That's exactly like the one I would, would get if I got a Jeep. No, sorry. This is not the one you're getting. Burger King. You're not getting this. It's not. Yes.[1:46:26]   So that is the worst part about owning every man's dream machine is that, yeah, they're going to come and talk to you. It's really, and it scares me every time a man comes to me, starts addressing me in the parking lot. This is me.[1:46:40]   Yeah. The tanks, the tanks, the tank. I'll walk right past them too. While they think I'm going to stop and have a whole combo with them about it. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. The tanks it's happened so many times that that's my move. I'll walk right past a guy asking me about the topic.[1:46:54]   Yup. The tanks gas tanks right into the gas station. Well, the Jeep is the number one most popular car. Like there's no, there's a million of them here. Every like every second guy has a Jeep here. It's like insane.[1:47:10]   So yeah, I don't know why you'd be excited by one. Yeah. And there's way more crazier ones than ours with way more add ons. I'd like to get something on the car that says, please don't address us, please. Okay. Let's, um, let's get into some good stuff here. Let's put on a video or something here.[1:47:30]   How about this light little fighter in the kid? LOL. I would love to hear it. Send it up, send it up. Fighter in the kid, Brendan Schaub, Brian Cranston, of course. Oh, Jay Moore. Yeah. We saw this on, uh, this is a good one.[1:47:47]   No, this is all over YouTube right now. This is fighter in the kid with Jay Moore. Jules did not know who Jay Moore was. You hear that more? I recognize the name, but she goes, who is this guy? Who is that? I go, Jay Moore from, and then I couldn't list anything. I go, he was a comedian in the eighties, but in that funny, what is Jay Moore doing to make a living right now? Do you guys remember Jay Moore?[1:48:15]   Didn't I get in an incident with Jay Moore a long time ago? Here is on the fighter in the kid. They're not doing well. How many views we got here? 53 K. Is that what I'm seeing? Really? Wait. 44 K views. Six days ago, 44 K that's how bad it's getting fighter in the kid. 44 K views. Those are Leo Dominique numbers.[1:48:41]   All right. Let's see the fighter in the kid. Jay Moore, too lazy to try a video about this. Probably got more views. Seriously. Too lazy to try is huge. He's getting one 57 K.[1:48:52]   Fighter in the kid. Cheers, everybody. Red bar. This is really the fighter in the kid. Come on, baby.[1:49:03]   That's weak. You got a great voice, dude. Why did you hit those high notes, bro? That's him, Jay Moore.[1:49:11]   Not today, Moore. I recognize the young him. I just didn't recognize him. Yeah. He looks pretty bad. How about that? He looks nasty.[1:49:24]   He used to date this woman with the biggest hooters. This red headed woman from saved by the bell. She, well, she played a blind woman and saved by the bell. One of Zach's dates.[1:49:34]   Which one should I do? Jules? I'm going to get you some Cush here. Tangerine Cush or sneakers.[1:49:41]   I think the orange one is sativa and the sneakers is a hybrid. Hybrid. We'll do that.[1:49:46]   I'm going to bust out a sneaker here. You guys want to do some sneakers with me? These are a little pre-rolls. We love a pre-roll. We love that they use a lesser quality weed and charge you more.[1:49:58]   A lot of people are real money hungry pigs out there. Look, Mike, you could get so much more weed if you just buy it and roll your own.[1:50:08]   Yeah. Okay. I should roll my own cigarettes then too, huh? Make my own vapes. Cartridges. I'll start a whole company where I do all this stuff myself.[1:50:18]   Uh, I like things done for me. Okay. I'm 65 years old. I'm a senior and I can't be doing this myself. Imagine trying to roll this myself. Are you out of your mind?[1:50:30]   You know how I make joints? I still do it where I have like a joint paper with a filter in there and then I put the weed in and I use a pencil to push it down.[1:50:40]   That's how I roll a joint. Hey man, I'm rolling a joint and you see me stuffing it and then taking a pencil and pushing it. That's me rolling a joint.[1:50:49]   It takes me about three hours to get a loose bumpy unsmokable joint. That's what they want me doing. That's unreal.[1:50:57]   No, I understand what they're saying. What the fuck is that? Oh, I thought I was losing my mind. Welcome to red bar. Have a puff.[1:51:10]   She's making it up by hitting the cues for me before I have to ask because of the recording thing. I was so surprised. I can't believe a song came on.[1:51:22]   Cheers everybody. Have a cup of puff of roost.[1:51:28]   This is the shit man.[1:51:29]   How boring was that 4th of July, huh? Did anybody else look up at the fireworks on the 4th and go, we need new fireworks.[1:51:40]   For the first time in my life, I've been like a firework. Yeah, I used to be a firework fiend. And this year we saw the fireworks and we're like, this kind of sucks now.[1:51:48]   Fireworks are kind of faggoty. Maybe we weren't close enough or something. I don't know. We didn't shoot off any of our own this year.[1:51:57]   Maybe that's the only good part. I've got no interest in fireworks anymore. These fruity little...[1:52:07]   I like the sound of a loud bomb. I'll tell you that. I like when you're...[1:52:12]   Instead of fireworks, maybe stick a stick of dynamite in some girl's glove box. Blow up her car. Blow up the front end of her car.[1:52:21]   What am I stuck on? Yeah, I found the fireworks to be quite boring. How about you guys?[1:52:26]   Maybe you live in Nantucket where the fireworks are still good. Imagine laying on that raft, looking up, seeing a couple of fireworks.[1:52:34]   I find 4th of July to be kind of crange now. You know, with all this Twitter discourse, it just doesn't seem right anymore.[1:52:41]   Yeah, I don't really care about the 4th of July anymore. I'm actually pretty much excluding myself from almost every major holiday now.[1:52:57]   What am I supposed to be doing? Like I'm celebrating along with Biden and the black lady who's the vice president. What am I doing on the holiday here? Hanging out with the troops?[1:53:07]   It's because every day with you is like a holiday, babe.[1:53:09]   I think that what it could be, you know, every day is so good that a holiday is actually a hindrance.[1:53:17]   Everyone else is having fun too.[1:53:19]   Yeah, holidays are my worst days. That could be in a rap song like me and Jay Z.[1:53:28]   Both me and Jay Z have this same kind of idea where a holiday is kind of like a distraction.[1:53:35]   It takes away from how good our life is going because then everybody takes off work. We can't get our stuff done.[1:53:41]   So yeah, I'm kind of against holidays. I always have been, but now it's so more than ever, I really, I can't think of a holiday in which they deserve me to join in on anymore.[1:53:58]   I mean, they're either for God, they're for the troops or they're for the damn president.[1:54:03]   4th of July is basically, hey, we're all celebrating Biden.[1:54:07]   I don't care who's in that office. I'm not celebrating those people.[1:54:13]   So 4th of July to me is, hey everybody, think about Biden. Think about him smiling.[1:54:19]   Think about Biden's favorite colors. What are they? Red, white, blue.[1:54:24]   Those are president's colors. Red, white, blue. It's cringe.[1:54:29]   I'm over it. Yes. There's all the novelty of remembering when you were a kid, you got to get over it. You're 40.[1:54:40]   Once you're 40, you got to stop doing what you did every day when you were a kid. When I was a kid, every day was a 4th of July.[1:54:47]   Do you do it? Do you run through the sprinkler still? Do you miss that? You got to get over it. You're never going to be a kid again.[1:54:54]   It's not going to make you feel any better to eat all that, those heavy baked goods in the heat like that. 4th of July.[1:55:06]   Maybe you just weren't in the mood this year and we kind of forgot about it. I don't know. I think people got to start developing new things that they do.[1:55:13]   But yes, every day for me is such a holiday. We should make our own holiday.[1:55:17]   The real holidays are almost like, oh, it's a holiday today. Great. So now the restaurants are closed. The grocery store is going to be a mad house if everybody's scrambling.[1:55:31]   And we cook like it's the 4th of July every day anyway, right? Hot dogs, hamburgers, corn on the cob, steaks, every day. I'm out there. 4th of July every fucking day.[1:55:43]   All right, here they are. Brian Callan, of course, big enemy of mine. I hate him more than I hate Brendan.[1:55:51]   If I had an oar, you guys ever played oar? That's where you got to spend one Airbnb weekend.[1:55:59]   It's just you and one of them in a house, full weekend, Friday, Saturday, Sunday. You see, you say goodbye on Sunday, of course, and you got to stay in some horrible city.[1:56:13]   So you're at this Airbnb. Who do you choose? Brian Callan or Brendan Schaub? That's actually an easy oar.[1:56:21]   Obviously Schaub.[1:56:23]   Obviously Schaub. Now you would only pair them together because they do this show together. So normally an oar, you wouldn't even pair them together because it's not even fair.[1:56:31]   So yeah, I hope everybody would rather spend the weekend with Brendan than Brian if your answer was Brian. So are you one of these people at home going, oh, I'd pick Brian for sure.[1:56:43]   You got to figure out what's going on with you. You got to look deep into you now because that's a problem. You shouldn't want to spend a second with this guy.[1:56:51]   I mean, you go there with Brendan, you have amazing stories, like 50 million funny moments you get to tell everybody.[1:56:56]   He'd be laughing at all your jokes. He'd be super nice to you. You could catch him doing something. You know what I mean?[1:57:05]   But it's light. It doesn't like bother you or make you sick. It just makes you smile.[1:57:09]   But Brian, you would feel like, okay, I'm like betraying a rape victim now. I'm like really getting sick here, dude. I'm like really going crazy.[1:57:21]   You know, that's dirty.[1:57:24]   They're saying once you picked big Mike over Callen in an oar.[1:57:28]   Wow. So I really must not like this Callen. Now let's say you don't really mind Callen. Think about it this way then.[1:57:35]   He really bothers Mike.[1:57:39]   Man, Callen really bothers Mike. There must be something going on with this guy that's really, really bad if it's really bothering Mike.[1:57:49]   I mean, Mike's picking big Mike over him. He's picking Brendan.[1:57:52]   You know, he can't even concentrate on Brendan Schaub during these shows because he just sees Callen. He gets so sickened. He tells you a whole speech about him.[1:58:01]   But how bad he is. Now, do I have any proof that Brian's done anything wrong ever?[1:58:06]   No.[1:58:07]   Have I ever caught him doing anything wrong or even bad?[1:58:11]   Nope.[1:58:13]   Just kidding.[1:58:15]   You wish.[1:58:17]   His negative aura is so strong.[1:58:19]   Yeah. His negative aura is so strong and disgusting. Like to me, him sitting there laughing like this is a crime.[1:58:28]   It's like, so if people go, what did Brian Callen do?[1:58:32]   I mean, he's jacking off right now, right?[1:58:34]   It doesn't matter. Even if this wasn't sexual. I mean, look at this guy. Seriously. How could you stand him? And if you can, are you too close to the kind of man that Callen is?[1:58:48]   Much to think about.[1:58:50]   It's a lot to think about. You got to consider it at least. Don't blow this off, guys. I'm begging you.[1:58:55]   We need you to really, really feel. Now, can that be used in court?[1:59:01]   Can that stuff be used in court? Your honor, he's begging his fans to hate us. We have done nothing wrong. He needs to beg them to hate us.[1:59:14]   Your honor, I need the support.[1:59:19]   Yeah. I don't know.[1:59:21]   We had a really good aura the other day that we were talking about.[1:59:23]   We had a great aura the other day. I love playing. Aura is a great summer game.[1:59:27]   That's one of our main games.[1:59:28]   Once summer comes around, I'm starting to think about auras because you're starting to think about Airbnbs, of course. There's nothing like an Airbnb in the summer.[1:59:37]   I hate Airbnb. You know, I'm picking hotels for all our destinations this summer. We're staying at hotels over Airbnbs. I refuse. I'd rather, even if we're going with a group of friends, they go, no, let's pitch and stay in a house.[1:59:50]   I go, I'll buy everyone rooms. I would rather have to buy rooms for three couples, then pair up and stay in an Airbnb together. Have you seen.[2:00:03]   I looked for like Airbnb. Have you seen even the best Airbnb in a certain city? And I showed, we go through all of like a hundred. I showed Mike and he said no to every single one.[2:00:15]   I go, I said no to every single one. And then I go do this, start with the price of $726 a day. And I don't even want to see anything because I don't want to see all the poor people stuff.[2:00:28]   And even when you get into this range where you're willing, okay, I'll spend $7,000 for a four day stay. It's not even worth it at that. You're not even getting anything good for that amount of money.[2:00:43]   You know, so a hotel is going to win every time. Now, at least you go to a hotel, you feel like you're on vacation. There's food you could buy to me. I'm like a kid when I, when I was a kid. And even now, my favorite thing is there's a little store there. Like I could buy something.[2:01:02]   You know, I got a whole burning in this pocket since I've been born where if I'm somewhere, I get a real kick out of, is there a drink I could buy? Is there something I could, even if I have nothing I want to buy, I get really excited that I can buy. If an Airbnb had stuff you buy while in it, then maybe it would be cool.[2:01:28]   I like the fact that we're at this hotel. Look at all this.[2:01:33]   They do actually have that thing now on Airbnb where you can request it to be stocked with like a bartender and a dinner, a chef.[2:01:41]   You're so alone. You're so alone. I want to know that somewhere in the building is a cash register and a company. There's a whole company connected to it. That's what I get a kick out of now. And that's where I put the money. So I spend it in hotels.[2:01:55]   But also hotels are cheaper now.[2:01:58]   They're cheaper. They're disgusting though. You can't get a nice, there's no such thing as a nice hotel. I don't know if there ever was. Maybe we were just all poor as kids. So we thought there were nice hotels. You show me a nice hotel. By nice, you mean, Oh, the guy downstairs is nicer than the other guy downstairs at the other place. That's it.[2:02:21]   So you could find like a $250 hotel is almost just as nice as like a $800 hotel now. And the guy at the desk is pretty much just as nice. It's very tricky.[2:02:38]   And then you can't really spend, there's only like one more level above that. And it's not nice either. It's all decorated very poorly tastelessly marble and movements in the marble. You know, when they say it's not bad enough that they just did a marble countertop.[2:02:53]   It's got, it's carved out in a traditional circle with all this shit here and this fucking wings and little, you know, it looks like the bottom of a lion's head as it goes into the sink. That is ugly. That's not rich. I don't think that I'm in a palace and I don't want to be in a palace. Have you seen Dubai? Oh, Dubai, please bomb Dubai, please. Please make them bomb Dubai.[2:03:22]   We watch a lot of hotel theme. Do you ever get your YouTube suggestion page? Page one day is suddenly only like hotel, like some dork. I stayed at Dubai's biggest hotel. Yeah. You ever watched some nerd?[2:03:37]   I'm going through changes. I'm going through a few changes.[2:03:44]   Uh, yeah, Dubai is disgusting. And please never go there. Nothing there is to be respected. Stop. Get it off your feet. All right. There are the fighter and the kid. Let's let them talk.[2:03:57]   Oh no. Are you okay? No, that gets me fired up. Why can't that be our intro? Wait to see what happens. This is right at the beginning of the episode. You got Brian, Brendan, and Jay Moore, who I don't think they've talked to in some time, but Jay's been watching. Jay knows. Here he is. This is his face, by the way, in case you're not comfortable with this guy.[2:04:22]   This is him. And he's acting, you know, he doesn't do podcasts every day like them. He's coming on with a different energy, a different spirit than they're used to on a podcast. Right. I noticed that right away. Let's see what happens to these losers.[2:04:38]   And copying, uh, iron maiden, I guess in my bedroom as a kid, bro. That's what I want to use that as our intro. Just, just that. Not funny.[2:04:50]   A lot of shows do this thing. We need to put that on the soundboard. That should be the thumbnail. We need to do that. That should be merge. It shouldn't be every five minutes. This is every host. That should be merge. That should be this. That's yeah. Yeah. Wouldn't know the world. Be great. If, uh, that would be, that could be, huh? Wow. Keep dreaming.[2:05:19]   And please enough with it. Yeah. How many more times do we got to hear, dude, that needs to be on a t-shirt and it's never anything good. It was just something that you thought was mildly, mildly, so mildly clever. At the moment, you get all excited. You got to interrupt everything to say that should be the new intro. Why? Cause it's not so bad.[2:05:41]   Is that why it should be the new intro? Are you just saying stock shit that really bothers me more than anything when these hosts abused the great wonderful privilege of host that I take so, so, so, so, so dearly and kindly and respectfully to my bedroom as a kid.[2:06:04]   That's what I want to use that as our intro for just, just that idiot you look like now.[2:06:10]   So keep that in mind. When you watch podcasts, you see these hosts slipping in this mindless crap where they say, Oh, that should be the, remember me.[2:06:19]   And then look at the cloud. And then you see this fucking look at this faggot, you know,[2:06:25]   you know, you got two families.[2:06:34]   What's this? My bedroom as a kid, bro. That's what I want to use that as our intro for just, just that the key.[2:06:45]   It's really, uh, yeah, it's good man. He's bringing it back.[2:06:49]   It's wrestling room rat first rat album out on the streets. That's where we meet.[2:06:56]   Did you ever see the iron maiden that the, um, court, uh, the sort of like, I just want to show you how soon this is right at the beginning of the show with this guy, more Jay Moore does to these guys. Pretty brutal.[2:07:09]   They asked the lead singer cause this guy, this, he, they were being sued because this kid committed suicide listening to the song. And he, they asked him, I have some, I don't know, but they asked him to sing the song of the ancient mariner.[2:07:22]   He actually sang it. I could bell. He's like, and the guy Laura goes, what is the thing you do at the end?[2:07:31]   And he's like, what? And he goes, the thing you're like, man, like that. And he goes, that sounds just how I breathe.[2:07:41]   Brendan really is sitting shy. That's right. I mean, that's a classic. Look at that. Yeah. He's sitting shy. Why is he so shy?[2:07:56]   His beard is getting, that is really just fair. Was it always like that?[2:08:03]   He looks like the McDonald's moon. You know, look at that. Can someone draw him as a moon? Just take off and then Photoshop the bottom part of his head and add it to this.[2:08:18]   Look at this. Imagine this kid going down that slide. You'd be to the moon. He looks sculpted. That's really cool. That's sharp.[2:08:28]   I think that adds to his face. I actually like that better than the rounded bottom. I do like this better than the round. So just to show you, I'm gonna outline it here.[2:08:35]   It's a coast South America there. Has anyone else seen those videos on Twitter that are always going viral where it's like some like Egyptian guy or something with a huge nose?[2:08:50]   And then it's like a plastic surgery video and then they show him with his big nose and then he ends up with like a little cute button nose. Have you seen? No, I've never seen anything like that in my life.[2:09:00]   There's like a hundred videos like that. And then everyone's like, Oh, this guy ruined his face. Yeah. Anyways, I just wish I could see what Brendan looks like with a little button nose. Cause it's really shocked.[2:09:10]   Somebody get on that. There's him holding his hackies. Can you imagine there's a hacky sack right there that he's holding? It's a denim hacky sack. Oh my God. I got a great idea for Brian since he likes selling handmade clothing.[2:09:23]   So holds. I will purchase handmade hacky sacks made out of the crotch of Brian Callan's real jeans. I'll pay him $1,200 just for this part.[2:09:36]   Just for the fan. How about this? Brian cut a circle out of the crotch of your jeans and send it to me. I'll give you $1,200 a circle. I'll make my own hacky sack out of the crotches of his pants.[2:09:50]   That is a real offer. Get that offer to call it. Okay. Out there. Just ask you to make it easy. Just to buy his jeans. Will you sell, I'll send $2,000 for three pairs of your jeans. See if he'll do that. If you guys could get me even one pair of Brian Callan's jeans that okay. How about that?[2:10:12]   The first person, if anyone can get me a pair of Brian Callan's real jeans with proof, that will be a $1,000 prize on top of the 2000 that you could pay him for those jeans.[2:10:30]   And then we will make as many hacky sacks as we can out of the one pair of jeans. And imagine selling those on the store. Brian Callan, authentic crotch hacky sacks.[2:10:43]   Because I need a new idea because I think the lawyers are going to put a stop to the openers, the yonder magnets. What? Yep. The lawyers. You didn't tell me about that. Well, I'm still going to do it, but the lawyers, it's not looking good. So maybe I do need a new, it wasn't supposed to be that big of a thing. Just a joke. The lawyers haven't stopped us, Jules. I was just kidding. Oh, it's just supposed to be a little.[2:11:14]   Thing about that. And then, but yes, I do really want to make the pants. Okay. Let's show you, does this start happening like right now? It starts at three minutes. Oh really? It was three minutes in. Okay. Yeah. We had to fast forward to them. Three minutes in. Did you give it some time to breathe? You could go to like two 40 if you want. Okay. Here they are. So three minutes into their show with Jay more. Anyway, gang, it's good to see Brandon again.[2:11:40]   So I had so much fun last time and you guys, uh, George and chin do a good job of, uh, like editing the clips and everything. It made it really easy for me to Georgia does all the, Georgia does it all. Nobody's little kid. They have a little kid filling in for Halla. Mark Harley who quit. It's that's all they could get to work for them. A little kid for credit school credit. That's too young to be working there. Are they crazy?[2:12:07]   Why do they have a little kid there? There's just no place for a child to be. This is the new guy who works on their show. This is who's switching cameras right now. This little kid, I mean he might, he is no more than 12. That can't be someone working for them, right? It's got to be someone's kid. Nope. Nope. And he must be older than we think. Cause he's either got hairy knuckles or tattoos all over his hands.[2:12:38]   What do you call those? So he can't be that young, but he's got the face of 10, 11, 12, maybe 13. Uh, and he seems to be, he's got a pen in his hand. He's taking notes. Seems to be a big part of the show now. This is insane.[2:12:57]   Yeah. And they would be furious if that kid was at a drag show and here they're being spread. So here, Jay Moore is going to say that, um, he was watching some clips that the guys made of them that they posted online and how great. Oh, they're so good. Every celebrity thinks like the worst poorly shot, poorly edited clips are amazing. Have you noticed this? Every fucking celebrity seems to think like,[2:13:27]   I mean, we're all aware that the level of production across almost every one of these shows is starting startlingly bad, right? Like the worst you've ever seen. So when they come in, Oh, your team is so great. Your team, you know, young Jamie is so amazing. Oh, your video, your guys are the best. Oh, there are guys. Yeah, they're the best. They're actually the worst.[2:13:48]   So it really shocks me when some guy has been on TVs, worked in TV for 35 years, she's been in movies. Surely the level of production you're seeing now should startle you. You should be going, guys, this is really low budge. Surely you could see that, right? Apparently not. He thinks the fighter and the kid clips that he saw looked great. Oh, the edit was so good. It was very choppy. The choppiest you could do. The worst.[2:14:17]   You could do the worst job you could do is what it was like editing the clips and everything and made it real easy for me to, Oh yeah. Georgie does all the, Georgie does it all. And, uh, but then I'm like, you know, I'd post it, co-post it. We collaborate. Then I'm reading the comments. I was like, do your fans like you? Oh, us. Oh my God.[2:14:35]   Oh my God. He was reading the comments and he's like, do these fans even like them? And look at Brian. Who? Oh, us. Yeah. Uh, I could explain, listen to how Brian was just, it was like, do your fans like you? Oh, us. Oh my God. Yeah.[2:14:55]   Take that home to your 85 kids. Take that home to your 85 wives. Do your fans even like you? Who? Us? Yeah. Yeah. What? They hate you? He's reading comments. They're horrendous. Every comment he sees about you two is bad.[2:15:19]   How do they not have like a prepared kind of answer for that already? I know that's, what's so weird about it too. Like they've been going through this for five years. How do they not have something? They're always so caught off guard.[2:15:36]   I've never seen before every Brandon clip online gets like decimated. Like the comments is all just really is nice. And thank you to everybody who's turned into what we wanted.[2:15:47]   I mean, really, this is why we screamed so loud on red bar. Cause we watched the rest of the world just accept this stuff. Uh, and these guys really get away with it. And we're coming to a point, I'm really proud that we're all at a point here where the consequences are real.[2:16:04]   You know, these guys are now finally getting what they've always deserved. And it's so nice to see that. Thank you. Thanks to all the little communities just to harass these people, but as stupid as they are, you'd think that they would at least come up with some hair brained.[2:16:18]   Exactly. How do they not have something? Yeah. Some stock thing to say, Oh yeah. So, you know, we can explain. They never have anything prepared here. Let's see how this went down. Here they are, Brian.[2:16:32]   But then I'm like, you know, I'd post it, co-post it. We collaborate. Then I'm reading the comments. I was like, do your fans like you? Oh, us. Oh my God. Yeah.[2:16:43]   It's I was like, Oh, I remember this world. Those aren't fans, but you know, those are listening. Exactly. They're for their listener. You specifically. I'm like all Brandon does is fucking try to exactly. They're listening. Well, they're listening. They're posting. Exactly. They're listening.[2:17:00]   Is that one of those sayings that you heard? Hey man, as long as they're paying, he said, they're not fans. They're listeners, which is what you always say. Yeah. That is what I call the audience. I like to call them listeners.[2:17:12]   You and Brandon have a lot in common. We do.[2:17:16]   Well, exactly. They're for their listener. You specifically. I'm like, well, all Brandon does is fucking try to help others and mind his own business, but they don't know that. Yeah. They just, they, they just, they do though.[2:17:28]   All Brandon does is mind his own business and try to help others that can't be. He did save those kids from that car crash. Why would anyone not like him? All he does is mind his own business and help others.[2:17:43]   Well, you know what? I'll tell you something. If I caught somebody doing that shit, I'd hate that helping others. I have proof. I showed you I hate charity.[2:17:54]   So yes, if I caught somebody helping others, I'd just take them. Okay. Is that enough of a reason? And then they're going to play dumb as to why that nobody likes them. It's because yeah, it's because.[2:18:05]   You specifically, I'm like, well, Brandon does is fucking try to help others and mind his own business, but they don't know that. Yeah. Just they, they just, they do though. They just think he's cocky football player. And that's, that's how they, I don't think that's it. I think they, they just hate him cause he's a cocky football player. Who is your football player?[2:18:27]   Like Brandon was once a football player, like yeah. Guess what? Hey, I'm Mike from red bar radio. And I've never heard anything about Brendan being a football player in my life.[2:18:43]   And I'm Mike from red bar. So it can't be why everybody hates him. I've never even heard that he's played football. I think that they kind of, what I was saying before, maybe that's not true. Maybe the response that they kind of cooked up was like, Brendan is cause I've kind of heard him say something like this before. Like Brendan is such a big, tough guy. Yeah. Classic alpha bro jock. So nerds naturally hate him, but nerds naturally hate him.[2:19:13]   Like nervous Callen that came out as the football instead of jog. Okay. But does Brendan play football? Oh yeah. I was just starting nine on the 40 drivers. Yeah. You know all that football crap. You guys got to get over football too. It's time. It is time. I'm sorry. The NFL.[2:19:37]   When I think of the NFL, I think of the wide white man, 65 years old with a head this wide. When I close my eyes, I think NFL, I think of a white man's head. He's 68 years old and his head is this wide. His fingers thicker than three of mine. That's what you like. What about the CFL? Ooh, is that ice cubes league? Kinda. I want to disrupt and destroy ice cubes basketball league.[2:20:07]   I'm taking the people off the street to bounce the ball. Get them off my courts. I want those courts turned into upscale market and prime vending. Please. I fucking hate B ball now, man. I got so burned. We're about to become sun's fan. I can't. Nope.[2:20:37]   Okay. Let's see what happens here. So yeah. You're fancy. You were taking over a lot of time, but this, we don't mean to, they don't know that. Yeah. They just, they, they just, they do though. They just think it's cocky football player, football player. That's how they, I don't think that's it. I think football player back in the day. I do think that if people saw, so you made up that they hate you cause you're a football player and then you're making an excuse for that. Like he was like, I stopped playing.[2:21:06]   So you lied in real time. They called you out and now you've got to do another one. And then he's going, that was like 20 years ago, guys, stop hitting me for football. But it's like, that's not why we hate you. That's what you just made. Oh, wait. You think Brendan's doing that? I mean, here, let's watch this.[2:21:22]   I don't think very important football player. You want to stop playing 20 years? I don't think that's it. Okay. Okay. So what's Callen's to you. So Callen, you tried to lie. So that was you in a lie. You just lied. They both said, ha ha ha ha ha. They both laughed it off. So you've committed lie. So don't say you never lie. Let's hear his excuse now.[2:21:49]   The day, you know, I do think that if people saw the shit you do behind the scenes, they'd be like, wow, I don't think it matters. No, no, they wouldn't care. No, those people. We can't win. Some people just love that one. The fools love that one. Big Mike tried that one for years. I've had every foil has tried that one on me. If they knew me in real life, they would never do this. Okay.[2:22:11]   Well, I don't know you in real life. This is how I know you.[2:22:17]   So, you know, I'm not going to even argue that with the fools. No, no, no. I just can't believe they even still use that attempt. That's quite the attempt. Huh? What an attempt.[2:22:29]   He doesn't matter. No, no, they wouldn't care. No, those people. We can't win. Some people just hate you. Some people hate you for not getting around. You know what Reggie Jackson said? Fans don't boo nobodies.[2:22:39]   Oh shit. That's what it is. He also said when he hit his third home run in the world series, a reporter goes, what were you thinking as you rounded the bases? He goes, I was thinking about speaking of booze, you guys got to step it up. That fighter and the kid Reddit needs to take to the damn streets.[2:22:53]   You guys could go, you could set up meetups in that fighter and the kid Reddit, which is that's your heaven. Imagine meeting up with everyone and you eventually get a huge group of friends. Now that's the real heaven of these communities.[2:23:08]   So think about this. You guys start arranging and this could be any anti-comic community out there. Now I see it. They're growing big groups, big numbers of people.[2:23:18]   It's gotta be enough of you out there that want to meet up at a show at a comedy club. Got to be enough. You're out there. You got one guy hiding the camera. You got another guy with the camera over there. You've, you've snuck them in somehow. And then you all start doing some big sun.[2:23:34]   I mean, think about how great these videos would be of comedians. I was just thinking, there's not enough videos of comedians getting like interrupted and heckled and brutalized on stage. This is not illegal to do. There seems to be enough people who hate these people. You don't want to ask you. I don't want to go out and personally ask people to do this and we never do.[2:23:57]   We don't assign people, but we do really respect the people who do do that. And cause the scene, if I was a young man, I would love to go out there, you know, 18, 20 years old, 21 years old. Let's hope.[2:24:14]   And you get out there, you get all drunk, just start screaming. It doesn't matter what you scream. They can't compete against that. They're expecting easy breezy, simple day at the office. You start showing up to those shows, start causing a madhouse every time.[2:24:30]   They're safe space ain't going to be the stage no more. Then where will they go? We want to take that safe, help them improve their craft. We want to improve and comedy needs improvement. Trust me. I've watched every special that's come out in the last hundred years.[2:24:47]   They're terrible. Even the ones from a hundred years ago, 50 years ago, 30 years ago, every special that's ever come out is not good enough. Take it from me. Take it from fucking me. It's not good enough. And they all need to be making us laugh. I want to turn out a comedy special and actually laugh. Okay.[2:25:08]   Not just go, yes, yes. And collect my time codes for the show. Yes, yes, yes. That's how I watch TV. That's what makes it so fun for me to watch all this stuff. Cause every time somebody screws up, it's a win for me.[2:25:22]   Hey, what did you think of the outlaws?[2:25:26]   Ooh, the outlaws. What was that movie you watched last night? Oh, Adam Devine. I'm a huge Adam Devine guy. I'm really inspired by look at this. You're not going to, people don't do this. I want to be like Adam Devine. I want to widen like him. I want to dress like the clip that made Mike want to be like Adam Devine.[2:25:50]   Yeah. Send that over. There's a clip of you guys know Adam Devine from party stopped in his tracks and says, finally, there is this great movie called the outlaws. It's on Netflix, right? It was horrible with Adam Devine. It's staying in chesty Hannity. What is your name? Victoria justice. We don't know you only the girls know you here. There's a clip of Adam Devine.[2:26:17]   We want to show right here. Yeah, but I got them off Instagram. So that's what I'm saying. I'm just like, I'll see shit. So is that your favorite thing? What's the best thing? No, the best things are like the things I've got for, uh, for pain relief. Like this thing that for my[2:26:34]   dude, you're wearing a championship belt right now. What is that? Yeah. Always dude. It heats your coming up. And then it also vibrant bright vibrates, dude. It's fucking vibrant. So I just want to say, I have always, of course, just like you despised divine, right? You just look at this guy and you're like, Oh fuck, how cheap can it get around here? Huh? Remember when they threw this into modern family, they destroyed the whole show.[2:27:04]   So to me, this is a cheap shabby faggot. At least I thought, but then we heard this, is it coming up? It's about to just keep playing. Okay. Listen to this on real. That looks good. Just loose. Loosen me up. That's that. I'm actually a little bit jealous of that. I think I could use one of those little lines. Oh no, it's about to happen here. It's about to happen. Listen. So remember I hated divine with all my heart, wanted him dead.[2:27:33]   And then he says, just bro pads. There's a little, I also it's by a hyper rice. I got one. I got this from my back. Oh yeah. Hyper ice does the, they do the Thera guns, right? Yeah. I'm all over those things. They do the Thera guns and they also do the norm. No Thera gun does the Thera guns. Hyper does Thera gun. Yeah. But they, they have their hyper. I know their own gun. And then they have, I'm just saying there are doesn't do speedos. Okay. We get it.[2:28:01]   Briefs. Then they have Norma tech. Wait, what do you call them then? If it's not called and what is it? I don't know what it's called.[2:28:09]   139 49. Okay. Wow. I'm glad you looked because see what happens when boys riff. We're still on the same subject, but the boys started riffing. I can't let you hear people riffing. Okay. That should be a yeah. Like NC 17.[2:28:26]   Okay. Here it is. We're talking about Thera guns though. They had to do their rips about the brand name. Okay. For a comedy voice, but then divine says this.[2:28:37]   He was legs in the sleeves. I got the, I got the ones for the calves and, uh, and then it, wait, why do you have five Thera guns? Yeah. What the fuck are you doing?[2:28:46]   Okay. I'll back that up a little bit. Maybe we missed a second of that. I love it. Pull, pull over, dude. I have five of those. And then they're the fucking shit, dude. I love them.[2:28:57]   You got to get the Norma tech sleeves where you put your sleeves, your legs in the sleeves. I got the, I got the ones for the calves and, uh, and then it, wait, why do you have five Thera guns? What the fuck are you doing? I have them all over. I have one. I have one in each car.[2:29:13]   Hopefully you all get why we love divine. He has five Thera gun. They're all shocked. Why do you have five? Why, why, why are you? They're so expensive. You should only have one. Well, no, I need, I have one in the car. I have one here. I got one at the office.[2:29:36]   That's my type of spending. It's so refreshing to hear. Well, yeah, the jealousy too. I mean, if Jules would let me, I'd have 1500 vacuums. I'd be like how, uh, Gabrielle Iglesias has all those Volkswagen buses. I'd have every Dyson they make I'd have every version of Thera gun.[2:30:00]   You know how badly I want to rebuy some of those items. Cause I love them so much. I mean the thrill of buying when you find out that you need a Thera gun, what a thrill. Yes. I get to buy that. Now you only have one third. I only have one. How did this make you feel? This makes me feel like I might buy three or four more and nobody going to ask me shit about why? Because he's explained it so, so well.[2:30:28]   What the fuck are you doing? I have them all over. I have one. I have one in each car. I have one in my backpack and then I have one at each house. Have you ever double gunned yourself? Have you ever put your dick in between two of them? I have. I love when I hear that these guys spend. I love it. It's very refreshing. I don't like hearing from the celebrity. I actually think this podcast is pretty good cause Adam just talks about all the stuff that he bought recently. I like that. I like a show where people talk about all the stuff that they bought. A nice haul. Yeah. Going over all this crap.[2:30:58]   So we are huge ads. That's what I would like. If it were up to me, Red Bar would just be talking about little items here and there. Like, uh, you know, we spend a lot of time talking about the Bissell green mean carpet cleaning machine. That thing works great. We love little things like that. When a new $300 and some dollar piece of crap. The steam mop. Oh, we got this new steam mop. Now we need one in each room.[2:31:27]   Right. And you're just, you buy these things and you can't wait until they start breaking and clogging. Someone says you must love two bears then. No, I hate hearing about the stuff that Tom has bought. Yeah. Tom and Bert don't buy anything. Cool. That's why I kind of like Devine. He knows what to buy. They're like, they don't clean their own house. They're no, that's not cool. They have their assistants buy them stuff. Yeah. You know, they don't even know what they want. They don't know. They don't compare the specs against Bissell and Hoover and stuff like that.[2:31:59]   No. I like a guy who's in there deep spending the day on Amazon, multiple tabs, comparing questions. All right. Let's see if there's any more to this clip here. The magnitude of me.[2:32:15]   Who's better, but it's true. You just hit three home runs in the world series. He was rounding second. Like, God damn. I'm going to what I ate.[2:32:24]   These guys from the East coast who do baseball metaphors and similes throughout their crowd. I hate that. I hate when somebody brings up baseball at all.[2:32:36]   There's a big anti-sports day here today. It's getting too goofy out there.[2:32:42]   But what about the Bart man? You love him. Yeah. I actually love the story surrounding. Well, get this. He's going to pretend he hates the Bart man, but when we were watching the bear, as soon as the Bart man scene came on, he was like, oh, that's the Bart man in Chicago. We all know about the Bart man. It's one of our local favorite tales. And he told the story just like a Chicago guy would.[2:33:05]   It's Bartman. Okay. Not Bart man. That's Homer's son. When he did a rap, this is Bartman. And yes, he was at the Cubs stadium and he caught the home run into his hand, leading the Cubs to lose the great world series. It was the final game of the world series.[2:33:33]   I think the Cubs were right about to win. And then this man, Steve Bartman, he got in the way of all of that causing the great Chicago curse to last another 68 years.[2:33:51]   Wow. And no, I am not into that huge fan of the game. I am not in it at all. That's exactly what I'm talking about.[2:34:05]   You're turning red because you know so much about baseball.[2:34:09]   This is a chant. I can prove it to you. I've got a tan line right here. You can see right here on my wrist here. You can see, look at that. Look at the color I've gotten in just a few days here. You see that? We can clear it. I can see it from this far away. So if there's any redness, it's from my tan. Okay. Thank you. All right. Were we done with this clip here with Brendan and Brian, or was there anything else?[2:34:32]   I want to see a pic of what Brian's going to look like when you take his jeans off. It's a nice top.[2:34:38]   I didn't even consider that they would be coming right off his body. Brian Callan. Okay. Let's see. What is Brian Callan going to look like? Oh yes, this came out. So yeah, let's take Brian's. Would you guys like to undress Callan with me?[2:34:52]   This is a little segment called if you're going to post it, we're zooming in. I do this with Hila Klein. I do this to all my guys. If you're so brave, you're so body positive. Well, let's see. Here it is, everybody. Brian and thanks to Rick Zazazama for posting this. Brian Callan let his fiance post this. Look at that. Look at this tiny. Jules, I think your dad has a better body than this.[2:35:23]   A hundred percent. Yeah. A hundred percent. Uh, you know, this really, I couldn't believe Brian Callan is walking around yelling at people and being such a big shot in his body is like this yet. He brings up this man. I'm the man. We should play that real quick with a Glassman. Glassman finally had the guts to confront Callan on why he is such a man. Brian always talking about being such a tough guy, a man, but all I see is this shriveled,[2:35:52]   up old man's body. I couldn't believe how much worse this is than my body. Of course, my body. I've got the body of a Greek GAD, a Greek GAD, G A A D. Google him. GAD sad, of course. Got the body of a Greek GAD.[2:36:15]   Um, so if you Google GAD sad, I think he's on a weight loss journey currently right now. He's looking great. So I can safely say I have the body of a Greek GAD. Okay. Uh, here is Callan's body completely disgusting. His little shorts are a little loose on him. You could see his stash down there. This is stash as far as I'm concerned. What you hiding? Well, I mean, what is it? Are you wearing underwear underneath your trunks? He's got, it's his legs cross like that.[2:36:43]   What am I looking at here? Oh no, that's okay. Of course his knee. His little legs are spread. He's got no dick. He's got no fucking balls. He must stuff. Uh, usually he forgot to stuff here at the beach and to post this little faggoty.[2:36:58]   I mean, when I looked at this brand, I go, you're a complete faggot. You're a homo. Your worst nightmare is true. I stood up. I pointed and laughed at this for 15 hours. I can't tell you how embarrassed you need to be.[2:37:12]   I can't tell you how embarrassed you need to be over this. I was zooming in like this. I was going, Jules, look how pathetic this is. It's like Aaron M M Holt for God's sake.[2:37:22]   Very papery. Look at your shitty nipple. You think this looks good. It looks like a dad's breast.[2:37:29]   This is a dad's brassiere. This little hair. You have two fans. You're wearing a dad's brassiere. You have two families with this shitty fucking nipple. This no nothing nipple. How about I flicked that off? How about I start kissing this?[2:37:43]   You fucking homo faggot. He's eating a little watermelon slice. You're having watermelon. Where'd you get these glasses? The toehold store. He didn't even post this. His girl posted it. Yeah. Rules. Danny pH. Cause you got to check the pH of her fucking pussy every time you fuck or else you'll get AIDS.[2:38:02]   Just got, that's, that's not me. I was just going with the character of bullying. I got a little carried away. Your glasses are fucking cringe. Okay. I'd like to snap them. When you get up to go frolic in the water with your pathetic body, I'm going to snap your glasses and hide them in the sand.[2:38:24]   Look at you. Look at your little lips. Oh, you were nothing to me. You are a trans man. You're no worse than the worst game. It's awesome that these guys just have to go on their vacations with their wives who are so clueless to what you can.[2:38:43]   If you posted something like this, I'd never speak to you again. If you posted an angle of me like this. I remember I have one memory. Don't tell them about your memories. When I moved to Chicago, I took like a picture of Mike where he looked so cute and he was doing a little dance in front of a TV or something. It was like part of a group of photos I was going to post.[2:39:03]   Of course. And he looked so cute. And I got so yelled at for posting one. You posted this? Yes. Don't you remember? Oh, I can't even believe there was a life before when you were allowed to do something like that. I guess I wasn't.[2:39:19]   And what happened? You got in trouble, didn't you? Yeah. And it was the cutest pic, but these guys have no standard. You had Jonah Hill. What's that? You Jonah Hill, but about your own pics. I act like Jonah Hill, but about my own pics. Yeah, you got it. You got it. Me and Jonah Hill come from the same tribe. I got the same fucking body as Hill.[2:39:45]   I'm loving this Jonah Hill discourse. He must be going crazy. Let's do one more Callen. This is from Rick Glassman. Shout outs to Ricky Glassman. Our little Ricky. Papa Kiva. It's Ricky time. Now we're not focusing on. Well, Ricky today, but Ricky had on Callen. Listen, I don't know what that makes Ricky. Of course, Rick Glassman.[2:40:11]   Uh, if you're not up to speed, we, we call them tricky Ricky, uh, his Kiva connection is a dangerous one. Watch out for the master manipulator, Ricky, tricky Ricky. Uh, you know, I can't say enough bad things about the guy. I hope people aren't fooled by him. You know, please don't be fooled by him. It's a disturbing to me though, that a guy like Ricky,[2:40:40]   I can hang around a guy like Callen. Here's Callen on the set. Here's Ricky. Rick is treating him like trash at the beginning, which I know is a big bit he does, but I do feel like he does it to more to people that he actually doesn't respect. I don't think Ricky likes Callen at all. I mean, he doesn't do this to every guest. No, I think he thinks of him as a, as a fool. You'll see some of this stuff. Yeah. Just play the beginning for a sec. Okay. The whole beginning. I mean, you don't have to go just when they are, they're not all this flashbacks and shit,[2:41:08]   but you can, it's only. Well, this might be a nice cold open to the episode. It could be a good cold open to the episode. I would say that there are things I know about Caitlyn Jenner that you are going to be very surprised at. Question. Yeah. It doesn't involve anything other than how brave she is.[2:41:29]   It does not involve anything other than how brave she is. So everything you have to say is really just about how great Caitlyn Jenner is. Yes. Oh, wow. That's a masterpiece. I can't believe they did that edit. I remember that from later on in the show. Okay. What did you want to show here? You don't have to, I mean,[2:41:59]   yeah, no, I didn't want to show any of that. Okay. Whatever. So you'll get the idea from what he asks, uh, Brian here. I mean, this is great. This is what I've been begging somebody to ask Brian for years. I've been asking Brian this question for years.[2:42:13]   And we're going to get a little answer here from insecure it out. But yes, I don't think Rick actually likes him. I do find it disgusting though. That for, as far as Brian's concern though, Rick likes him a lot and they're friends, right?[2:42:28]   So as far as Brian's concerned, they're friends. That to me is too far. You should openly hate him. So it's not enough that Rick secretly hates them. He's got to openly hate them.[2:42:40]   You can't be palling around with them and being their friend and then just doing a little thing for guys like us. And then, you know, you got to hate them fully. You can't hang out with them. You can't do podcasts with them if you want to be cool.[2:42:53]   So he hangs out with Chris D'Elia too. So it makes me think, is Ricky one of these late night boys? Is he one of these hotel boys along with, you know, uh, D'Elia and Callen here? Is he one of these types of guys? He might be from what I've experienced. I don't want to, I know he's a very litigious man from what I experienced. I think Ricky is a little, uh, ugly with the ladies as well.[2:43:18]   He's okay with it. That's let's just say that.[2:43:21]   I think he's okay with D'Elia. Yeah. You're okay with D'Elia and Callen. These people who could put that aside. It's crazy. It's like all these people who I saw Cain Vatos this morning, Jules. And I spoke to Cain. I raised my voice at him, just so you know, Cain Vatos from Cain and Pia. He's one of the nicest guys on the planet and a guy that I truly.[2:43:42]   He's the nice Tate.[2:43:44]   I always thought that, well, no, don't say that. It's not nothing like Tate. That's an inside joke. He's the nicest guy. You would think that his sense of, uh, you know, what's right and wrong is, is, is dialed in. You'd think he's a guy you could trust. And I saw him on Logan Paul's engagement post this morning going, yes, go Logan.[2:44:06]   And it's like, so Cain, you're it's like you, all these people make a choice. You all know that yes, D'Elia is the, the rapist. Callen's the rapist. Logan's the scammer, right? These are the things that have been alleged and you just decide that's a lie or it's true, but you don't give a fuck and you publicly just don't give a fuck.[2:44:32]   Like a guy like Cain Vatos, that's what blows my mind. He's the sweetest nicest guy. You would think he wouldn't want, at the very least you wouldn't want anyone seeing that you're friends with Logan Paul.[2:44:44]   So you're hearing about all these scams and you're just like, yeah, fuck those victims. Logan's cool. Same thing with this. It's like, so all of Chris's allegations, you hear all that and you just go, eh, fuck it.[2:44:57]   I'd rather hang out with Chris. It's like, you could pet, there's a million other guys to hang out with. I feel like if the guys who, uh, you know, are alleged rapists and alleged schemer, and that's all you hear about them every day.[2:45:11]   Maybe there's somebody better to be friends with than them. Isn't it? Couldn't that just be easy? You need to be friends with them so bad. Aaron Paul, you need to go out of your way to let us know that you're on team D'Elia.[2:45:26]   That's crazy. It's like when I see D'Elia's audience all laughing and giving them a standing out, there's girls hugging him at the end.[2:45:33]   Or why don't you hang out with him secretly at least? Yeah, do it in secret for God's sakes. But it's so wild to me. It's like, so you just, do you think it's all a lie? Are you pretending that it's just bullshit or you don't want to look into it?[2:45:50]   If you're going to hang out with a guy, you should come out with a personal defense of him. Yes. Yeah. That's what you need. Yeah. You need a personal defense. I stand for Chris D'Elia and here's why.[2:46:00]   Yeah. You can't just simply be friends with him and not suffer the consequence. Okay. Let's get to that time code that we're talking about here with Brian.[2:46:08]   You could go to 6.50 first. 6.50? 6 minutes? Yeah. 6.50. Cool. But all in all, this podcast was pretty boring because they would not stop riffing. They were just riffing. It was only riffing.[2:46:21]   Two guys and they get so, oh, it's so gay. Sorry about all the gay bashing stuff I've been saying on this show, but you know.[2:46:39]   Don't listen to that. Here we go. Now I'm feeling good. Now we're ready. We're in Brian. Hey man, how you doing bud? I'm a man. It's good to be here.[2:46:49]   When he said that, we couldn't fucking believe it because every time we see him, we go, he's a man, man. He's a man who is the man dragon.[2:47:01]   I mean, that's how he fucking talks. We can't believe it. And he's always saying shit about being a man. And it's so cringe. We make fun of it every time. It's not, I don't think he's like even aware that that's, what's coming out of his mouth every time.[2:47:15]   He doesn't mean for that to be the first thing he says about himself, but he just gets nervous and says this. That's why it's so funny. This isn't like his official tagline of himself.[2:47:26]   Maybe it is now. If he starts pretending, that's like when Michael Ray Bauer called himself Michael Ray Hey Bauer once by accident and I made fun of it. And now he goes, Hey everybody, it's me, Michael Ray Hey Bauer.[2:47:40]   It's like, no, you fucked up your own name. Once I made fun of it a lot. And now you, Oh yeah. That's how you've always done it. Huh? Yeah. Right. So it could be like that. If you ever see him start leaning into it, it's cause I made fun of it. Watch this.[2:47:56]   Now I'm feeling good. Now we're ready. We're in Brian. Hey man, how you doing bud? I'm a man. It's good to be here. Yeah. I just good. You know, I asked you on here years and years ago. I'm glad you could finally make it. I didn't know you had a podcast years and years ago. I think this is a new podcast. Let me put up the, and you're not a fucking man. We just saw the pics. You a bitch.[2:48:20]   You can say I'm an old man. You can't say I'm a man. I just saw your very girly little faggoty body. That's a fresh picture from the beach. First picture at the beach, by the way, you had a tan line from your head to your body. Your body's pale white. Your head's red. So what's going on in those shorts? Didn't even look like you should be wearing those on the beach.[2:48:52]   There was no trunk-like material to be seen. It was very fabric-y. Very stupid. So you're not a man. I'm so sick of this man. He's going to confront him on this. You can go to 1-15-20. Finally 1-15-20. Unfortunately it's at the exact same part as the clip that they used for their intro. So I guess this is everybody's favorite part of the show. Amazing.[2:49:15]   Okay. So yes, it's going to be just like the intro 1-15-20. And you heard Brian at the beginning of the show say, I'm a man. Look at this little guy here. Look at this lunch lady. When he does his hair and curls like this, that makes me extra mad at him.[2:49:31]   Ricky, you look like such a little baby. He sits on the floor while his grandma pets his head. I'm not kidding. This happened recently. He's a little fucking family's boy. The family passes him around like he's a six-year-old nephew who just won like a big basketball trophy. They pass him around like that. They call him little Ricky. They're all petting him and cuddling with him. He is phenomenal. It makes me sick.[2:49:58]   He's a real family faggot. He's into his fucking family. Okay. Watch this.[2:50:06]   So everything you have to say is really just about how brave Caitlyn Jenner is?[2:50:11]   Yes.[2:50:12]   Now, would you be okay if Caitlyn Jenner competed in the Olympics for women?[2:50:21]   Yes, because she's now almost 70.[2:50:29]   But what if she competed in the, uh, some type of competitive Olympic type thing?[2:50:35]   So it was interesting. He brought up Caitlyn Jenner to rag on and Glassman picked up on this. He goes, Oh, it's one of these guys.[2:50:42]   I honestly think that they're just bidding out. And by this point in the show, they just were throwing out, you know, how Glassman gets in that mood where he's just like throwing out random things.[2:50:52]   I think Glassman is trying to very subtly make some sort of point about the trans stuff to Callen because he knows that Callen's been taken by the trans mind bug.[2:51:04]   It could be.[2:51:05]   And I think he's messing with him here a little bit. It doesn't really matter. We're more here for what he's about to say next. Listen to this.[2:51:12]   Uh, some type of competitive Olympic type thing for older people.[2:51:18]   I would be against it.[2:51:19]   Because she used to be an Olympic athlete?[2:51:22]   Who was a man.[2:51:23]   See, I don't even think Caitlyn Jenner was ever a man. And I know we are different.[2:51:28]   She's a biological man.[2:51:30]   That's what you think.[2:51:31]   Well, no.[2:51:32]   You don't know what it's like.[2:51:33]   I do because I'm a man. What do you mean?[2:51:36]   You know, however, I mean times you forced me about how deep your voice is and how much of a man you are.[2:51:40]   That's when I'm on the street.[2:51:41]   It makes me wonder, why are you so needing to let me know and let us know how much of a man you are?[2:51:46]   This scared Callan. So yeah, Rick does his real sneaky stuff where you don't know if you're doing a bit with him.[2:51:56]   You don't know if he's getting serious for a moment. You don't know if it's a mix.[2:52:01]   So basically as the guy who Ricky's doing this to, you have to go along as if it's a bit, you know?[2:52:09]   Because you can't start.[2:52:11]   No, you can't risk it all. So you kind of got to play along with it. But I mean, Ricky isn't saying this for nothing.[2:52:19]   Let's see that again.[2:52:20]   Times you forced me about how deep your voice is and how much of a man you are.[2:52:23]   That's when I'm on the street.[2:52:24]   It makes me wonder, why are you so needing to let me know and let us know how much of a man you are?[2:52:30]   Because I'm afraid. Put me on the spot right now. I guess I'm a little insecure.[2:52:38]   He's a little insecure.[2:52:40]   Yeah. I want to know. I want to know that I'm a hero and not a coward.[2:52:44]   Real question. You have insecurities, right?[2:52:46]   And I don't like that he could just throw it back on. It's the old never ending tale, oldest time man stuff.[2:52:53]   I want to know that I'm the hero, not the pawn.[2:52:57]   No, no, no. This is more specific to you. Don't pin this on history.[2:53:04]   Okay. Yes. There's been a lot of faggots like you in history, but it's not history. This is you.[2:53:12]   I want to know that I'm a hero and not a coward.[2:53:15]   Real question. You have insecurities, right?[2:53:17]   Yes.[2:53:18]   Right.[2:53:19]   You do?[2:53:20]   Are there some insecurities that you're shameful of and some you're more accepting of and could speak publicly on?[2:53:24]   Not anymore. I've never been shameful of my insecurities.[2:53:26]   There's never been a time that you were-[2:53:27]   That's what I put on stage.[2:53:28]   There's never been an insecurity that you were ashamed of that you may not be anymore.[2:53:33]   I think I'm very open about my insecurities.[2:53:35]   What about your bone structure?[2:53:36]   I've always talked about my bone structure. I've never been like-[2:53:39]   What about your cauliflower ears?[2:53:41]   I don't have them, but I have a little cauliflower on this ear. I'm proud of that.[2:53:44]   You gave that to yourself, you sick fuck.[2:53:47]   He was in the mirror punching his fucking ear so that we'd think he's boxer.[2:53:55]   You thought I would think your fighter because your ear?[2:53:59]   I didn't even know he did that.[2:54:01]   I didn't either.[2:54:02]   He says he has a little- you don't get that just from two weeks of sparring around with your buds throughout your whole life.[2:54:09]   He sat himself and punched himself in that ear so he'd come home from sparring and he'd go-[2:54:15]   He would do this because he wanted to have the Brendan Schaub ear and people go,[2:54:26]   Oh, he might look like a tiny little pipsqueak, but this guy, I can tell he's been in a lot of fights.[2:54:32]   He must know his stuff.[2:54:34]   I can't believe that.[2:54:35]   I didn't know that was true.[2:54:36]   Cauliflower ears.[2:54:38]   I don't have them, but I have a little cauliflower on this ear. I'm proud of that.[2:54:41]   When people say, did you wrestle? I love saying yes.[2:54:44]   When I used to box, I would say, I'd like to bring it up in topics of conversation.[2:54:49]   And I like, like sort of dropping the fact that I get in the ring.[2:54:53]   I don't just hit miss.[2:54:54]   I challenge you to a full unboxing match, bitch.[2:54:58]   All right.[2:54:59]   Better accept, otherwise your pussy.[2:55:01]   All right. Was there any more from this app?[2:55:03]   Nah.[2:55:04]   Okay.[2:55:05]   This is boring.[2:55:06]   Let's take a breakthrough on the AC.[2:55:07]   Let's get some agua up in here and then we'll be right back with much more.[2:55:11]   Okay.[2:55:12]   That was barely the fucking intro.[2:55:14]   Sit tight.[2:55:15]   Don't go anywhere.[2:55:16]   We'll be right back.[2:55:17]   Hang tight.[2:55:52]   I'm[2:56:04]   up and over the fence.[2:56:06]   And only depends on sweet, sweet.[2:56:08]   Over your head, over your head.[2:56:41]   Oh,[2:56:46]   oh,[2:56:49]   oh,[2:56:52]   oh,[2:56:56]   oh,[2:57:00]   oh,[2:57:05]   oh,[2:57:07]   I feel like Diddy standing in a bank I feel like Diddy dancing in the rain[2:57:34]   I feel like Diddy dancing in a bank I feel like Diddy dancing in a bank[2:57:52]   I feel like Diddy dancing in a bank I feel like Diddy dancing in a bank[2:58:10]   I feel like Diddy dancing in a bank I feel like Diddy dancing in a bank[2:58:30]   I feel like Diddy dancing in a bank I feel like Diddy dancing in a bank[2:58:54]   I feel like Diddy dancing in a bank I feel like Diddy dancing in a bank[2:59:18]   I feel like Diddy dancing in a bank I feel like Diddy dancing in a bank[2:59:42]   I feel like Diddy dancing in a bank I feel like Diddy dancing in a bank[3:00:00]   I feel like Diddy dancing in a bank I feel like Diddy dancing in a bank[3:00:21]   I feel like Diddy dancing in a bank I feel like Diddy dancing in a bank[3:00:45]   I feel like Diddy dancing in a bank I feel like Diddy dancing in a bank[3:01:07]   I feel like Diddy dancing in a bank I feel like Diddy dancing in a bank[3:01:28]   I feel like Diddy dancing in a bank I feel like Diddy dancing in a bank[3:01:49]   I feel like Diddy dancing in a bank I feel like Diddy dancing in a bank[3:02:10]   I feel like Diddy dancing in a bank I feel like Diddy dancing in a bank[3:02:31]   I feel like Diddy dancing in a bank I feel like Diddy dancing in a bank[3:02:54]   I feel like Diddy dancing in a bank I feel like Diddy dancing in a bank[3:03:15]   I feel like Diddy dancing in a bank I feel like Diddy dancing in a bank[3:03:36]   I feel like Diddy dancing in a bank I feel like Diddy dancing in a bank[3:03:57]   I feel like Diddy dancing in a bank I feel like Diddy dancing in a bank[3:04:19]   I feel like Diddy dancing in a bank I feel like Diddy dancing in a bank[3:04:40]   I feel like Diddy dancing in a bank I feel like Diddy dancing in a bank[3:05:01]   I feel like Diddy dancing in a bank I feel like Diddy dancing in a bank[3:05:24]   I feel like Diddy dancing in a bank I feel like Diddy dancing in a bank[3:05:43]   I feel like Diddy dancing in a bank I feel like Diddy dancing in a bank[3:06:05]   I feel like Diddy dancing in a bank I feel like Diddy dancing in a bank I feel like Diddy dancing in a bank[3:06:35]   I feel like Diddy dancing in a bank I feel like Diddy dancing in a bank I feel like Diddy dancing in a bank[3:07:05]   I feel like Diddy dancing in a bank I feel like Diddy dancing in a bank[3:07:35]   I feel like Diddy dancing in a bank I feel like Diddy dancing in a bank[3:07:54]   I feel like Diddy dancing in a bank I feel like Diddy dancing in a bank I feel like Diddy dancing in a bank[3:08:24]   I feel like Diddy dancing in a bank I feel like Diddy dancing in a bank I feel like Diddy dancing in a bank[3:08:45]   I feel like Diddy dancing in a bank I feel like Diddy dancing in a bank I feel like Diddy dancing in a bank I feel like Diddy dancing in a bank[3:09:08]   statements. So they're fully trying to get out of paying anybody back.[3:09:11]   They haven't paid anyone a dime back.[3:09:13]   A guy should to get paid back and their whole response to the lawsuit was we do[3:09:17]   not live in Texas. So apparently some sort of a hot shop, mumbo jumbo,[3:09:22]   right? To get this guy to eventually stop spending his lawyer money.[3:09:27]   A very crooked way to respond. I mean,[3:09:29]   I can't believe a public figure would even choose that route.[3:09:32]   That's like a route that dirty darn does in the eighties to get[3:09:37]   out of some scamp. You know, not something a public figure.[3:09:41]   Except for like Cavos. So that ass.[3:09:44]   The only person talking about it is UK's Cavos.[3:09:47]   I just got an idea I'm from some guy or an email. He goes, mate,[3:09:52]   you should go after UK YouTube is plenty of that cause I hate Cavos.[3:09:59]   Oh yeah. Cavos. It's like, chill the fuck out. Oh, Cavos is disgusting.[3:10:03]   I hope that's not what people see when they see a guy like me.[3:10:05]   I hope that's not what they see when they see a guy like me start coming on the[3:10:08]   screen, screaming and crying.[3:10:10]   Cavos has taught me a lot about that person. I do not want to be near. No,[3:10:14]   we love Cavos.[3:10:16]   At least he's covering the Logan Paul thing,[3:10:19]   but UK YouTubers for the most part in regards to that guy's question of covering[3:10:23]   them. I don't want to even be around them.[3:10:26]   I'd like to just imagine that they're only in Britain.[3:10:28]   I can't stand the sound of a UK accent.[3:10:32]   It gets more hideous to me as the decades go by.[3:10:37]   I hate all of London top to bottom. I hate the vibe,[3:10:42]   the look, the feel, the people, the sound, the, the wardrobe,[3:10:47]   the, the restaurants, the ground, the air, the birds,[3:10:51]   the bus, the stupid fucking phone booth that they need,[3:10:57]   the double decker, but I hate it all.[3:10:59]   And I hate every everybody pretty much in all of Europe.[3:11:03]   I truly do. I don't want to cover them. I don't want to know they exist.[3:11:07]   And I'd prefer they stay off YouTube. This is an America thing. Okay.[3:11:12]   Leave it to us. So, uh, yeah,[3:11:16]   hopefully we won't be covering YouTube. And by the way, most Americans,[3:11:19]   when they hear people from the UK talk, we cringe tremendously.[3:11:22]   I know you guys think, Hey, the girls must really like some very,[3:11:27]   no, that was in 1993 for two months and nobody's doing that anymore.[3:11:32]   Okay. You haven't had a handsome guy represent your,[3:11:37]   your country since 1992. It's over. There's no more, uh,[3:11:41]   we love that accent. Don't do it. Harry styles.[3:11:45]   He keeps his quiet. Doesn't he pretty fucking quiet, huh?[3:11:49]   You forget that he's got that voice under there. So that's why keep quiet,[3:11:54]   keep quiet. Be like Carrie cells. Look down when I see you and I approach you.[3:11:58]   And that's Harry styles scared out of his fucking mind.[3:12:04]   So yes, we are done with the UK here at red bar.[3:12:07]   We don't want any association with a UK listener anymore.[3:12:12]   We're going to be canceling the subscriptions to anyone out of state,[3:12:18]   Arizona only me, Danny Woodward.[3:12:22]   Well, I hope Danny Woodward still lives here.[3:12:24]   I went looking for him the other day. I went through his hometown,[3:12:27]   used the address and file and I was circling his house for hours and[3:12:32]   hours and hours. Couldn't find the guy. He must've been hiding from me.[3:12:38]   So yeah, if you live locally,[3:12:40]   I have every right to come check you out before we let you in the group.[3:12:46]   I go, what's your scars club username to get in the group. You give it to me.[3:12:49]   Then there's a pending day where I go drive up. If you live in Arizona,[3:12:54]   we come by your house, we check in, we see what kind of property you have,[3:12:58]   how you keep your property, how nice you keep it, you know,[3:13:03]   and then we make a decision. Thank you very much. All right. We're going to do,[3:13:07]   what were we going to do? What were we doing? Something big now?[3:13:09]   Talking about Logan, getting engaged.[3:13:13]   Well, yeah, that's what I was going to say.[3:13:14]   I was dying the second he announced that he was getting engaged.[3:13:19]   And I go, I can't wait for the video. I was imagining it.[3:13:24]   In 72 hours,[3:13:27]   I will make the biggest life changing decision I ever made. You know,[3:13:31]   one of these scripted videos. And then today, this morning,[3:13:35]   that exact video comes out. Should we take a look? See what he's doing.[3:13:39]   Logan Paul gets engaged. This video came out today.[3:13:45]   Yeah. Double check everything. We good? Okay.[3:13:48]   Look at this shirt.[3:13:52]   Today's the day where I ask the love of my life to marry me.[3:13:56]   14 months ago, I fell in love with.[3:13:58]   Jules already falling for it at this point. You know,[3:14:03]   girls fall for this. Remember, this is an actor. You know,[3:14:06]   we're going to do a big thing about actors today.[3:14:08]   We're going to show you what an actor looks like in real time using the, uh,[3:14:13]   Abrams method, of course,[3:14:15]   this is acting. This is what Logan Paul does. Remember,[3:14:17]   he is a fake wrestler, a circus performer in the WWE,[3:14:21]   which when you see him in his getup,[3:14:24]   it looks like you're watching that show, the wrestler,[3:14:26]   the movie where you're seeing an out of work, you know,[3:14:31]   like circus performer, really being dragged.[3:14:34]   And that's how I envisioned Logan Paul to me. I was like,[3:14:37]   I don't know what I'm going to do. I don't know what I'm going to do.[3:14:40]   And that's how I envisioned Logan Paul to me. I don't see WWE here.[3:14:45]   I'm going to find that clip from big light Mike's blog vlog one second. Yeah.[3:14:50]   I don't see WWE when I see Logan Paul,[3:14:53]   I see circus performer. I see the sad end of the circus,[3:14:57]   the sad side of the circus where men are, you know, they're there.[3:15:02]   My kidney got popped, you know,[3:15:05]   my kidney got popped here because of all the trapeze that I've been doing,[3:15:09]   you know, this circus here, click this video, watch this.[3:15:14]   You're John Mike. I got, and I got killed. Probably say to[3:15:23]   go on, Michael, here's big Mike.[3:15:27]   And he's running into Logan backstage. You know,[3:15:29]   Logan's on his way to his dressing room. He's wearing the circus suit.[3:15:34]   And it just doesn't it look like he's going to go in his thing and do steroids[3:15:38]   and then cry. Okay. Like wait two seconds.[3:15:43]   Go on, Michael. All right, always going to see it.[3:15:49]   All right, mate.[3:15:51]   First time I talked to him in like five weeks. You're my friend. You're my friend.[3:15:56]   Yes, you are. He's all dressed up in his costume.[3:16:01]   There's no hooker. So Mike said, no, Mike said no. Cause there's no,[3:16:03]   no, I will defend him. He did.[3:16:08]   It's like,[3:16:08]   you're not supposed to see someone like that when they're in costume in that[3:16:12]   way. It's a circus performer.[3:16:14]   Now you're an out of work personality.[3:16:19]   You're an out of work entertainer who is now a circus performer.[3:16:23]   That's what this looks like on a PJ and he yelled at me.[3:16:27]   We're coming back out. We're coming back. Okay.[3:16:31]   And it's like a CD out of work entertainer too.[3:16:35]   And when you see the first half of the vlog,[3:16:37]   Jeff and Mike are out being like normal guys in London.[3:16:41]   And then they get to visit their freak friend. Who's in this troop.[3:16:45]   Yeah. You're in this traveling troop where you do it.[3:16:49]   And when you actually see these wrestling moves that they're doing,[3:16:52]   it's so pathetic. I mean, they're literally fake punching each other.[3:16:57]   And like hitting the ground. It's you guys can't be watching that.[3:17:02]   I'm so sorry. I don't know what happened as a kid. I mean,[3:17:06]   it must've been one of those pretty, pretty, uh,[3:17:10]   typical upbringings, right? Where something went wrong,[3:17:14]   but you had those little WWE figures to keep you company, right?[3:17:19]   Something went wrong with your dad.[3:17:22]   Something went wrong with your dad. Didn't it? I don't know. I mean, I'm just,[3:17:26]   that's really offensive to a lot of people. It could be great. It could be great.[3:17:30]   I guess the WWE, I always see these 35 year old men.[3:17:33]   Everybody has these out of shape, slightly chubby guys,[3:17:37]   but they're having the time of their life. Your thing. The air is sure.[3:17:41]   They're thing wrestling. Everybody has their things. No,[3:17:46]   I just can't believe you would. And these guys,[3:17:48]   all these people who like wrestling hate Logan Paul.[3:17:52]   Like they don't like the idea of him. He's a joke. He's a loser. He's a,[3:17:57]   and now they love him. Cause he can do a, a jump off of a chair.[3:18:03]   Well, they still, it's too much. I know that's a wrestling thing.[3:18:06]   You're playing around and you know what? This is medieval times[3:18:11]   and they don't even serve food.[3:18:13]   Medieval times is better because they have weapons.[3:18:15]   Medieval times is better, you know,[3:18:17]   cause you don't personally know the performers, you know,[3:18:22]   but that's all it is. So when you go to WWE, you gotta remember,[3:18:25]   this is medieval times. And I don't want you,[3:18:29]   if you're an adult and you've got even a couple,[3:18:31]   even one WWE figure like on your little shelf, please remove it.[3:18:37]   Get rid of your children's toys.[3:18:43]   They're not going to be worth anything. You don't need the turtles.[3:18:47]   You don't need the Ghostbusters toys anymore.[3:18:49]   I don't want to see any toys in a man's home.[3:18:53]   I want to see a lot of stainless steel and glass[3:18:58]   and very, very high end modern elements. Just kidding.[3:19:03]   I don't want to see that either. We're very against that. All right.[3:19:07]   Let's see Logan's getting engaged.[3:19:09]   Beautiful human being I've ever seen in my life.[3:19:11]   And I have been waiting for this day ever since.[3:19:18]   Coming off the back of launching prime in Spain, Germany, Denmark,[3:19:21]   in Norway, signing FC Barcelona, winning money in the bank.[3:19:26]   I didn't actually win, but I did get left with this nasty little battle scar.[3:19:30]   This has been one of the craziest weeks of my life.[3:19:31]   And we have finally reached our summer destination.[3:19:34]   And it does come. I mean, he is the master of this.[3:19:36]   This does come the same week that everybody's talking about him,[3:19:40]   not paying back the crypto zoo stuff, which he promised. I mean,[3:19:43]   the only reason he got out of the crypto zoo thing is because he said,[3:19:46]   I'm paying everyone back. I'm going to fix this. It's been six months.[3:19:50]   He's refusing to speak.[3:19:51]   And prime is being investigated by the FDA.[3:19:58]   Prime is finally being investigated by the FDA, you know, and yes,[3:20:03]   he can make his little excuses for all this stuff,[3:20:05]   but what kind of guy is constantly involved in scams and prime here?[3:20:09]   Let's show them the prime article real quick.[3:20:12]   It should be at the top of next up. Great. Here it comes.[3:20:17]   This was very funny to read. Look at this.[3:20:20]   FDA asked to investigate Logan Paul's energy drink prime,[3:20:25]   which has the caffeine of six cokes.[3:20:30]   So they're going after him. This is on ABC news. It's as big as it gets.[3:20:36]   They say that the energy drink has earned some popular.[3:20:40]   Basically they have a prime energy drink,[3:20:43]   which is advertised as 18 plus. Cause I think most energy drinks are,[3:20:47]   but since prime and the other drink is so popular with kids,[3:20:50]   kids are drinking it anyway and getting crazy.[3:20:53]   Kids love prime all over the world.[3:20:55]   I go into the vitamin shop just to bother the bros at vitamin[3:21:00]   shops. You ever been in a vitamin shop?[3:21:02]   They don't know anything about any of the products. I go, hi,[3:21:05]   do you guys carry thorn amino acids? He goes, is that like a testosterone?[3:21:11]   I look around this whole place is just selling loony testosterone.[3:21:15]   The vitamin shop has turned into a full, I don't know who they hired.[3:21:20]   It's like they hired the gym guys.[3:21:22]   And then the gym guys slowly started restocking the shelves with just their[3:21:26]   favorite bullshit pre-workouts. That's all it is. I go, you don't know.[3:21:31]   He didn't know what thorn was at the vitamin shop. Thorn,[3:21:34]   the head company in nutrition.[3:21:38]   I go thorn. I couldn't believe it. That when he said, is that like testosterone?[3:21:42]   I go, thank you very much. Do you need it? No,[3:21:46]   I don't need your help. That's all I needed to know here.[3:21:49]   So here's prime being held by a little black kids.[3:21:52]   But it's funny because in all these articles that are talking about how prime is[3:21:56]   so bad for your kids are showing the bottled version instead of the can,[3:22:00]   which is actually getting investigated. So all the parents are going to be like,[3:22:03]   I just saw a picture. Isn't that funny?[3:22:06]   Cause I was going to say that this article is not even showing the prime energy,[3:22:10]   which is being investigated. They're showing the prime hydration drink,[3:22:14]   which has no caffeine, no caffeine, but now parents are seeing this image.[3:22:20]   And now they're going to say no to prime.[3:22:21]   Now check out this little black kid's hands.[3:22:24]   What's he been scraping at his own ass?[3:22:29]   I mean, this kid's fingernails are covered in shit and blood and he's got a[3:22:34]   little wart. What kind of kid do you know has warts? That's disgusting.[3:22:39]   So this is the type of charity you want me to donate to, to help him? No,[3:22:42]   thanks. He's biting his nails too.[3:22:45]   He's biting his nails with all this red and decrepitness all over there.[3:22:49]   That's probably caused by the prime. He was a nice kid before the prime.[3:22:52]   So now he's scratching it himself from the six cokes. Well, they are,[3:22:57]   they're letting little, little kids drink this.[3:22:59]   I saw like a one year old kid drinking prime energy.[3:23:02]   I drink that I can't even stomach. Really.[3:23:06]   You can't even stomach these energy drinks anymore.[3:23:08]   Unless you've had a giant meal first,[3:23:11]   you really have to like prep to take an energy. They make you so nauseous.[3:23:16]   So here they are, and they're being investigated.[3:23:18]   People are having anxiety, digestive issues.[3:23:21]   It's got a lot of impacts on young children, heart problems.[3:23:25]   So just as bad as Joe Rogan's vaccine,[3:23:29]   you hear that prime is given more problems than the vaccine JFK.[3:23:34]   So you got to ban prime because I know you guys are on top of this vaccine[3:23:38]   stuff. That vaccine is, might as well be injecting yourself with pure poison.[3:23:44]   It's the same. And so is prime.[3:23:48]   So I need all the anti-vaxxers to go, what's the biggest VAX.[3:23:52]   And this is going right towards your favorite thing in the world.[3:23:55]   The children all of a sudden.[3:23:59]   So these children are drinking things that cause heart problems,[3:24:03]   anxiety, and digestive issues. That's even worse than the VAX.[3:24:08]   So you must stop prime.[3:24:11]   I'm begging all the anti-vaxxer people, Joe Rogan,[3:24:14]   you got to go against prime day in and day out. I hate that damn vaccine.[3:24:21]   Man. Oh man. I could barely stomach that vaccine to tell you the truth.[3:24:26]   Seriously. That's all I'm thinking about.[3:24:31]   All right. So Logan is now engaged. Now this is a lie.[3:24:34]   Look at the shirt he's wearing. I mean, it's like it's ribbed.[3:24:37]   Where did you get this Nordstrom's rack?[3:24:42]   Who makes this? Sean puffy cone.[3:24:46]   I mean, that's such a horrendous shirt.[3:24:49]   It looks like a pajama shirt that I have. Did anything happen?[3:24:52]   This video is epic. And don't watch it with your girlfriend. Cause she'll be like,[3:24:56]   Oh my God, he's actually such a nice guy. He's not, this is all acting.[3:25:01]   It's being videotaped. It's all an act. It's a video.[3:25:05]   You see, this wasn't like a video that he found out was shot about him.[3:25:10]   You know, uh, by accident, he,[3:25:12]   every edit of this video was decided on by him. So you got to keep that in mind.[3:25:18]   So here he is. He gets engaged. Will you marry me?[3:25:22]   It's one size too big.[3:25:29]   See the marriage. Yeah. You got to see, here's the marriage.[3:25:32]   I don't want to do the whole thing.[3:25:33]   It's so nonsensical trying to hide a Polaroid camera every time.[3:25:37]   No, not the whole thing. I just mean this part. Okay. Here he is.[3:25:39]   He's going to say I do.[3:25:41]   And it really does look like Justin Bieber from every angle.[3:25:47]   Like that looks like a younger Justin Bieber. Okay.[3:25:50]   You go. I'm sorry. I'm being such a pussy.[3:25:57]   Can you hit this button for me, please?[3:25:58]   Oh my gosh. Baby girl.[3:26:05]   Will you marry me?[3:26:14]   And that is how I ended up engaged.[3:26:20]   Jesus Christ.[3:26:23]   It's cool. It's cool with me. Oh my God.[3:26:28]   I put this on.[3:26:37]   This is almost like a Chris D'Elia move of crying so much to show how[3:26:41]   genuine he is. Exactly. Yeah.[3:26:45]   Him and Chris D'Elia are very similar. Logan. Logan is pure evil.[3:26:49]   You know, we studied Jake who cries every day. Yeah. Brother Jake.[3:26:54]   If this was brother, does this mean I'm married to Utah?[3:27:00]   Brother Jake thinks now he's engaged to his girlfriend. Jutta.[3:27:05]   He bought her a Volkswagen Jetta and took the logo off and add them to a custom[3:27:10]   Yuta J U T T A. And he got her that he flew it all the way to[3:27:15]   Belgium. Well, there it is. Logan Paul is engaged.[3:27:19]   What will this mean though for the future?[3:27:21]   Will big Mike not be able to hang out with him that much now?[3:27:25]   And maybe big Mike will start turning on Logan.[3:27:28]   Big Mike and Jeff are full-time BFFs now Logan is just kind of[3:27:32]   trying to hold on to Mike.[3:27:35]   If Logan can't do that when he's married,[3:27:37]   maybe Logan will lose big Mike and we'll get some big Mike secrets.[3:27:40]   I'm willing to give Mike a third chance here. If he does the right thing,[3:27:45]   you know,[3:27:46]   somebody left big Mike know we're willing to give him another try.[3:27:51]   If he should turn on, on his, on his brother, Logan. Okay.[3:27:55]   That's what we want.[3:27:57]   All right. Let's do some more little ones here. Okay. Oh, wait.[3:28:01]   Here's a little one. That's good.[3:28:05]   And then I really want to show them our Tony because that's like my favorite.[3:28:09]   Yeah. Let's do a little one. Let's do Tony Hinchcliffe with a big bomb.[3:28:14]   Wait till you see Tony today. Love that little one for you in next step.[3:28:19]   Next step comes a little one. Oh, Sam Tripoli. Oh God here.[3:28:24]   This is pretty bad. We saw this cause we thought all this stuff.[3:28:27]   Was over, you know, Sam had come in and apologized to us. He said,[3:28:31]   he had changed. He had grown. Remember he said, I was on drugs back then.[3:28:35]   I quit doing the drugs. I, uh, I didn't know what I was saying.[3:28:40]   I didn't know what I was doing. Mike, please,[3:28:42]   if you could find in your heart to forgive me, we said, of course, Sam,[3:28:44]   it's water under the bridge. She goes, thanks, man.[3:28:46]   I actually think you were like really funny, you know?[3:28:49]   So it's so stupid that we had to get mixed up in this. And I was like, no,[3:28:52]   it's fucking cool. And then we find this clip,[3:28:56]   she kind of goes against all that stuff that I thought we were cool. You know,[3:29:01]   is that the right set up for that? I thought me and Sam were cool,[3:29:05]   but we're not. Is that the set up for this clip? So here it is.[3:29:10]   YouTube or clip from this episode. Yeah. Just go do the clip,[3:29:15]   but from this episode. Okay. Here it is. And this thing, right. She's,[3:29:19]   she literally believes in the Holocaust. She's fiercely Jewish. Right.[3:29:24]   We're lined up here. 57 42. Does that sound good? I think so.[3:29:28]   Here's Sam on his show. Tinfoil podcast.[3:29:32]   This is what my hair is starting to look like here too. Michael Scotting.[3:29:38]   That's how my hair is going to be very soon. This is very Jewish,[3:29:40]   a very Jewish look. You know, this guy could be, you know,[3:29:44]   there was a Jewish guy in the show, very popular show suits.[3:29:47]   A guy I really admire from this show suits.[3:29:52]   His name is a fuck.[3:29:55]   What's that rat's name from suits.[3:29:58]   The bald Jewish guy. He's got the best name in suits.[3:30:02]   Louis lit. This is some Louis lit[3:30:07]   type of hair. And I'll tell you, Louis lit.[3:30:11]   The name is so good. He's a lawyer, right?[3:30:14]   You know why they named him Louis lit? Why?[3:30:17]   Litigation. Louis lit will call him.[3:30:22]   That's disgusting that a show thinks that they could do that too.[3:30:25]   Cause Louis lit was supposed to be a respectable Jewish man.[3:30:29]   And then you're thinking to yourself, you're going to wait, wait, wait,[3:30:32]   like lit as in litigate writers.[3:30:38]   Does he know the writers did that? Does he even know that's what they did?[3:30:42]   That's super embarrassing to me. So this is some Louis lit ass hair. This is a,[3:30:47]   I didn't click the clip. You have to click, click the first link. Sorry.[3:30:51]   I just put that in just in case the clip didn't work,[3:30:53]   but that's the part you want to go to. Okay.[3:30:56]   I mean, you do have a freedom not to get attacked for words.[3:31:00]   So here we are. Here's the clip. Yeah.[3:31:03]   I think they were just backwards in there. Okay. So yes,[3:31:06]   it's a clip from the show. You saw the Louis lit type of look he's got going on.[3:31:09]   And then this guy says this, I don't know who this guy is.[3:31:12]   I mean, you do have a freedom not to get attacked for words. That's,[3:31:15]   that's legally, you know, it's illegal to attack somebody saying something.[3:31:20]   Uh, I mean, it depends on what he's saying. No, not by the law. The law,[3:31:25]   there's the law for that. Yeah. Okay. Sometimes go to jail. Yeah.[3:31:29]   I'm just making sure there is a law against that. Right.[3:31:32]   Because it's something they said. Yeah. Well,[3:31:34]   some people say some things and people show up.[3:31:37]   So he has to keep this up forever now because you see how he can't,[3:31:42]   because that took his co-host or whoever that guest was that caught him off[3:31:46]   guard. He's like, wait, people should,[3:31:49]   there should be you're going to fight people for saying things that's against[3:31:52]   our whole stance here with this Liberty and all this. Well,[3:31:55]   sometimes you got to show up.[3:31:57]   So I thought that was pretty gnarly considering that.[3:31:59]   I thought Sam liked red bar now. So here,[3:32:04]   here's that legal.[3:32:06]   Saying something. Uh, I mean, it depends on what he's saying. No, not by the law.[3:32:11]   The law is illegal. You will go to jail for that. Yeah. Okay.[3:32:14]   Sometimes go to jail. Yeah. I just want to make sure there is a law.[3:32:19]   Right. Because it's something they said. Yeah. Well,[3:32:21]   some people say some things and people show up. Yeah.[3:32:27]   Yeah. Maybe they're inciting you,[3:32:28]   tricking you into putting yourself in jail. Possibly. It's always possible.[3:32:34]   Oh, really? That's exactly what we've been trying to do.[3:32:39]   Yeah. Set him up for jail. He doesn't care. He's going to go to that prison.[3:32:43]   Damn. It sucks to have a guy who doesn't care about going to jail on your tail.[3:32:48]   So, uh, it looks like he's still on our ass. Um, there he is,[3:32:52]   but that's a great one to use. If anything should ever happen, you know,[3:32:56]   that he said, your honor, he's saying you don't care about jail.[3:32:58]   He knows fully the consequences of his actions here.[3:33:01]   He knows what he's doing.[3:33:03]   Knows what he's doing. He wants to hurt. He wants to go to jail.[3:33:08]   Could you imagine?[3:33:09]   Wait, someone in the chat said Sam's producer's name is Johnny Woodward.[3:33:14]   Johnny Woodward.[3:33:20]   I hope that's not a joke. Cause that's not a very strong joke.[3:33:23]   I hope that's real. Not a very strong joke. Okay. Tony time. Oh my God.[3:33:27]   This is so good. Bring them up.[3:33:30]   I mean, Oh my God. I just almost called you big Mike.[3:33:33]   That's fine. I actually respect the fuck out of big Mike.[3:33:37]   I'm having a rough day today.[3:33:38]   You're having a really rough day.[3:33:40]   You're going to have a lot of rough consequences soon for the day.[3:33:45]   No, you're not getting any consequences. It's all fine. I'll save the show.[3:33:49]   My consequences are a nice big hug.[3:33:51]   Basically the video of Logan doing his proposal.[3:33:54]   That's how Mike acts to me every day. Every day.[3:33:58]   He wakes me up every morning with an album made out of one of kill Tony's little[3:34:02]   joke book with little sayings written in.[3:34:05]   This is the first time I realized that we knew each other because we both got[3:34:10]   the same scene.[3:34:11]   He wrote a book earlier in that video.[3:34:14]   He made a book about all the things he loves about her and every single thing[3:34:17]   was like, I love how you make me coffee in the morning.[3:34:21]   I love how you're always there to support me. I love how you do things.[3:34:24]   He loves her because she's a free personal assistant. I mean,[3:34:29]   the only things Logan likes about her that he said in this video are things that[3:34:32]   she does to help him throughout the day.[3:34:35]   Yes, literally. That's all he showed.[3:34:37]   You're amazing. You don't care about any of my scandals.[3:34:41]   You don't care that all of the audience called you a man in Justin Bieber.[3:34:45]   They're all saying it's true. He is named Johnny Woodward. Even Zander.[3:34:49]   Oh, wow. Johnny Woodward.[3:34:50]   It's true.[3:34:50]   Look at that. Well, maybe that is, uh, one of Danny's family members.[3:34:55]   Okay. Tony Inchcliff. Come on down. Where is he?[3:35:02]   Here we go.[3:35:05]   Oh, this fucking what's this guy's name. Nathan. Daniel.[3:35:10]   Nathan. Is that his name? Nathan. Jared. Nathan. Seriously.[3:35:15]   I will give money. If somebody can take him down, execute him.[3:35:21]   Okay.[3:35:21]   There's gotta be somebody that could jump out of this crowd and slice his head[3:35:24]   off for me. I hate Jared. Nathan. We got,[3:35:29]   we just got rid of Michael Loehr. We just got rid of Michael Loehr.[3:35:34]   That took me years. And then they replace him with this.[3:35:43]   This has to stop.[3:35:44]   And fans of comedy need to stop thinking that seeing a retard perform[3:35:49]   comedy is so funny and that it has to happen every week.[3:35:53]   It's awful. It's really the worst thing you could do.[3:35:57]   It's worse than the worst bad comic. You know what I mean?[3:36:02]   It's worse than the most boring comic to have a retard go up and you're all[3:36:06]   laughing. Cause he's retarded. That's all you're doing.[3:36:08]   You don't like his jokes. There's no jokes.[3:36:20]   It really gives people a thrill to see like a retard doing normal people's[3:36:23]   stuff. They're either faking it.[3:36:27]   They're laughing at it or they have a thrill that the retard is up and moving.[3:36:33]   It's it's one or the other. And that's all bad.[3:36:36]   The only thing you should do when a retard takes a stage, just go, ah, fuck,[3:36:42]   fuck, fuck, and be furious.[3:36:48]   Listen to the sound of this guy's voice.[3:36:50]   For myself,[3:36:52]   speech therapy has evolved over the years.[3:36:59]   It first started with me saying tongue twisters.[3:37:04]   How much word can a word choc choc.[3:37:07]   Get ready for one of these every five feet, by the way,[3:37:11]   after they get rid of my precious abortions,[3:37:14]   get ready for one of these everywhere you look, there's going to be one.[3:37:17]   Carving and fucking snot, touching you, getting stuff on you.[3:37:22]   Get ready America.[3:37:24]   You're not going to be able to eat a fry without seeing one of these guys out of[3:37:26]   the side of your eye. It's going to be awful. It's going to be awful.[3:37:30]   Every dry out the streets are going to be just burning cars everywhere.[3:37:35]   Huge crashes, pile ups, helicopters flying into buildings.[3:37:41]   Maybe they, and they can't even do our jobs. It's it's,[3:37:45]   I would rather have all illegal immigrants than one of these,[3:37:50]   unless they can, they do Amazon, make Amazon easy enough for them to do.[3:37:54]   Then I'll be okay with it, but they need to be doing something.[3:37:57]   And then I want a discount on the fucking Amazon. How about this?[3:38:01]   You get to keep the tards. We won't abort them anymore,[3:38:05]   but they all have to work at Amazon for free.[3:38:07]   And the customer sees those savings, then I'm in.[3:38:12]   But otherwise, if it's just all the prices keep skyrocketing,[3:38:16]   and then they're also around farting and burping and they don't brush[3:38:21]   their teeth and they're breathing down my neck.[3:38:24]   Listen to this.[3:38:25]   A wood chalk and chalk wood. Now it evolved to me eating.[3:38:38]   Cause he said pussy.[3:38:41]   I like how when there's a guest like black people don't fully get this retard[3:38:45]   shit. Watch this. Here's this black guest.[3:38:49]   This ain't for him. And that's how it should be.[3:38:55]   It ain't for him. He's not going to sit around and pretend, by the way,[3:38:59]   what are you wearing? Tony?[3:39:01]   I will give a thousand dollars to any man who could find out why he needs to be[3:39:06]   wearing scuba under a t-shirt[3:39:11]   with a watch over the scuba.[3:39:13]   I would really like to know,[3:39:14]   because I had a theory that it was something to do with.[3:39:17]   He thought his neck looked too long and thin.[3:39:20]   Cause remember when Tony used to come out, it was like seeing a pterodactyl.[3:39:24]   When Tony used to come out, his neck and head would be about,[3:39:27]   you ever met a guy with a long head and a long neck? It's disgusting.[3:39:32]   We mock those people. If your neck is longer than it should be,[3:39:37]   you're fucked because we've been mocking you for years.[3:39:40]   I don't know if you knew that long necks.[3:39:42]   We had a guy, Dan Grossman,[3:39:46]   Dan Grossman growing up, Google them. No,[3:39:50]   I don't. You'll never find him. Dan Grossman growing up,[3:39:54]   his neck was this long. And then by the time you got to the chin,[3:39:58]   his head was another alien's length of stuff.[3:40:03]   You had a thing like, I can't even show you. It would be about this long,[3:40:06]   but this way. And I go, that looks grotesque.[3:40:11]   So we thought maybe Tony was embarrassed of his long neck.[3:40:15]   But the other day I saw some pic of him on the comedy mothership or something[3:40:18]   where he was wearing a regular.[3:40:20]   Yeah. He was wearing a V cut polo or something. Yeah.[3:40:23]   And that shows a lot of neck that accentuates the neck.[3:40:26]   So that blew our theory of he's trying to cover up his neck.[3:40:29]   He looked, even though he was dressed like a weird cop or like mall[3:40:34]   worker, he's still like better than this.[3:40:37]   We need to know and it can't just be because he's gay.[3:40:42]   We need to know why he wears, nobody wears under arm. Okay.[3:40:47]   Someone in the chat says it's because he's a golfer now.[3:40:50]   And that's the trendy shirt. Is this true? I can't imagine.[3:40:54]   I can't imagine. I mean, I've seen, see here right now in my eyes,[3:40:59]   I'm closing my eyes. I'm picturing a bunch of guys on the golf course.[3:41:02]   None of them are wearing this. Sorry. Sorry.[3:41:07]   In my imagination.[3:41:08]   I haven't seen anything going on on a golf course he was wearing was a golf[3:41:12]   outfit. I don't know if this is golf. This is more of an underwater sports,[3:41:16]   water adventure type suit. I mean,[3:41:18]   this is what you would wear if you were waking up at six 30 AM and surfing the[3:41:22]   coast. I don't understand. And it's not just this,[3:41:26]   he's always wearing all sorts of, um, um, you know,[3:41:31]   cycling outfits, uh, you know,[3:41:35]   just really specific,[3:41:38]   specific sporting outfits that you could really only get. Um,[3:41:44]   if you're really into the specific sport on the show, we don't know.[3:41:48]   And it's hot, it's hot and humid. It's hotter than July.[3:41:52]   It's a summer when niggas die. It's a summer when niggas try.[3:41:57]   It's as close to latex as he can get away with in public. Yeah. Well,[3:42:01]   that's very funny. That's a funny answer.[3:42:03]   I'm looking for the real answer. Somebody's got to knock on his door.[3:42:07]   Maybe I'll email red band and go red band. I got to know,[3:42:12]   why is Tony wearing the slick sleeves? This is black arm,[3:42:17]   black neck. It just doesn't make sense.[3:42:19]   And this is nothing compared to some of the outfits that he's worn.[3:42:25]   It really bothers me too. I'll say that. I,[3:42:29]   it's not okay. Not okay to dress like this. I don't care what the reason.[3:42:34]   I just need to know the reason, but thank you here.[3:42:37]   Akhmad Iqmahd or whatever your name is for realizing that[3:42:42]   retards aren't funny. I know the band has[3:42:46]   lost their way as black people. Okay. This guy used to never laugh at a retard.[3:42:50]   Now he's laughing at every retard as if that's what's up.[3:42:54]   The band has lost their way. D madness cut off his braids.[3:42:57]   You should see him behind you. He looks like a family matters now,[3:43:03]   but I liked it. The black guy keeps it real. It's like, nah.[3:43:07]   If his mom caught him acting like this,[3:43:11]   he would be in huge trouble. My mom. I mean,[3:43:14]   if there was a black guy who was acting like this. Yeah.[3:43:18]   And I hate this guy's whole look. I mean,[3:43:20]   I really hate this whole king of Queens style retard that you see running all[3:43:24]   over this whole, uh, there was a guy like this on Twitter.[3:43:27]   He was hooked up to a bunch of Twitter machines dying. He killed his wife.[3:43:31]   What was his name? There was a comedian. He killed his wife.[3:43:37]   He's a midget. They say he killed his wife,[3:43:41]   but she died from drug use. Patton. Patton Oswald.[3:43:47]   There's a lot of these little Patton Oswald,[3:43:49]   retarded guys running around these chunky guys. Now[3:43:56]   I did[3:44:02]   I can't stand that. I can't stay. I don't have any patience for that.[3:44:06]   None whatsoever.[3:44:09]   That makes me want to destroy the place.[3:44:13]   So the fact that there's people out there like even him, this drummer,[3:44:17]   laughing it up, what is so fucking funny about this to you?[3:44:22]   Are you just so fucking nice?[3:44:27]   Do you have so much fun on a fucking daily basis?[3:44:31]   That guy is too happy. You're too happy. I don't like somebody that happy.[3:44:35]   You gotta be miserable. Most of the time for me to like you[3:44:40]   party.[3:44:43]   And she[3:44:47]   went down. I wish Joe Rogan crashed his car into the stage.[3:44:58]   His, uh, his Camaro. Yes, his Camaro. Okay.[3:45:03]   Let's get to the, the, the portion that we wanted to show you.[3:45:06]   Tony does a giant bomb here and he must be exposed,[3:45:09]   punished and humiliated.[3:45:14]   Yup. Cause nobody else is doing this stuff. Nobody else is, uh,[3:45:18]   humiliating Tony for all these terrible moments that he has.[3:45:22]   So we'd like to really highlight these 48 39, 48 39.[3:45:27]   Watch what Tony does. And we got this whole comics joke too. Right.[3:45:31]   About that. Okay, great. So there's a comic on steroids coming up here.[3:45:34]   You'll see what happens.[3:45:51]   I know I look like I sleep on an air mattress. It's because I,[3:45:55]   it's because I do, but, uh, I also have sex in an air mattress.[3:45:58]   You haven't tried it. Give it a shot. All right.[3:46:00]   You kind of have to do a missionary the whole time. Cause like,[3:46:03]   otherwise a toenail is going to pop the bed or something. You know what I mean?[3:46:06]   Like it's dangerous. I was having sex with her the other day, uh,[3:46:08]   from behind air mattress, Joe,[3:46:11]   I no stranger to air mattress jokes. Uh, James Fritz,[3:46:14]   our old co-host built his entire special off that he was poor[3:46:19]   and slept on a deflating air mattress.[3:46:23]   He made the hit record on the red bar,[3:46:26]   comedy record label deflated.[3:46:29]   Number one,[3:46:30]   beautiful poster of the man laying on the air mattress in a[3:46:35]   beautiful orange abyss. Remember that beautiful poster, James Fritz.[3:46:40]   So I'm no stranger to the air mattress, humor and comedy.[3:46:43]   James Fritz had a very famous air mattress rant that took Chicago[3:46:48]   by stormy would take this. Now that I'm thinking of it, you know,[3:46:52]   four or five years, he went around town bar after bar night,[3:46:55]   after night, year after year,[3:46:57]   and told a story just about his air mattress.[3:47:00]   How funny it is that he's 36 and he sleeps on an air mattress, right?[3:47:05]   Very fucking funny. I'm seeing this. I'm going, wow,[3:47:09]   this air mattress, what did a toenail poked it?[3:47:12]   James Fritz's version was that, uh, a cat's nail poked it. Okay.[3:47:17]   They all have a version of how it gets popped that they think is funniest to[3:47:21]   them. So this guy goes, Hey, your toenail could pop it or something.[3:47:26]   Who the fuck knows you having sex, you grinding this bitch.[3:47:30]   My air mattress actually won't pop because it's a very,[3:47:34]   very nice air mattress. You should see this thing.[3:47:38]   If you get on an air mattress, you see about this tall here,[3:47:41]   get the fuck off and call a lawyer. That is,[3:47:46]   if it's like a bone colored,[3:47:49]   especially the colors they pick for air mattresses,[3:47:52]   you'll get like bone on the side and maroon. Yeah.[3:47:56]   Or maroon is suede on the top. It's like guys,[3:48:01]   or Navy and bone maroon and bone[3:48:05]   gray. Of course, the worst shittiest gray guys,[3:48:09]   air mattresses could look, they should look like a seahawk for guys.[3:48:13]   Give them some color.[3:48:16]   So this guy's doing a zero mattress humor.[3:48:19]   Going to pop the bed or something. You know what I mean? It's dangerous.[3:48:22]   I was having sex with this girl the other day from behind cause I'm cool. And,[3:48:26]   that's disgusting by the way, behind,[3:48:30]   unless you take a big piece of tape and wrap it around her waist and your butt[3:48:33]   cheeks to keep those cheeks fully together. Behind is sick.[3:48:37]   She was digging her claws into the bed, you know? So I was like, whoa, whoa,[3:48:42]   whoa. And she turned around and she looked at me and she was like,[3:48:46]   what are you close? I'm like, yeah, close to sleeping on the fucking floor.[3:48:50]   All right, let's, let's pull it back.[3:48:53]   It was actually really good. The third time I've heard this, she, he goes,[3:48:57]   I was like, Oh, Oh, she's like, Oh my God, are you close? Yeah.[3:49:01]   Close to sleeping on the fucking floor. That's hilarious. Wait,[3:49:04]   this air mattress joke rules.[3:49:06]   And this is even better for what Tony's about to do.[3:49:09]   Let's hear the whole joke again. Now keep in mind,[3:49:13]   this is one of Mike's let's watch it again. But with this in mind,[3:49:17]   this is one of Mike's favorite comics[3:49:24]   just scan. It is right now at the moment. This is my favorite comedian.[3:49:28]   Listen to this.[3:49:33]   I, uh, I know I look like I sleep on an air mattress. It's because I,[3:49:37]   it's because I do, but, uh, I also have sex in an air mattress.[3:49:40]   So you haven't tried it. Give it a shot. All right.[3:49:43]   You kind of have to do missionary the whole time. Cause like otherwise,[3:49:46]   a toenail is going to pop the bed or something. It's dangerous.[3:49:49]   I was having sex with this girl the other day from behind cause I'm cool and[3:49:54]   she was digging her claws into the bed, you know? So I was like, Whoa, Whoa,[3:49:58]   Whoa. And she turned around and she looked at me and she was like,[3:50:02]   what are you close? I'm like, yeah, close to sleeping on the fucking floor.[3:50:10]   You know, it's fun. I like having sex in an air mattress though. Cause uh,[3:50:12]   that way I can see with our screams. That sounds good.[3:50:17]   There were no, it was completely silent in the room. And then Tony,[3:50:21]   I got to say almost every single time someone comes,[3:50:24]   I watch every episode of kill Tony and whenever a guy comes out that has me in[3:50:28]   tears and I think is so funny, it's always a guy who gets like,[3:50:31]   I'm not saying that this guy's really funny. No, this guy sucks.[3:50:34]   We don't think this is funny. Don't worry.[3:50:35]   But occasionally there is like a great guy that comes out and everybody is just[3:50:39]   silent. And yeah, they don't know what to laugh at.[3:50:42]   I think that we should start a club where we take all the kill Tony guys.[3:50:46]   Cause we give them a home. This guy deserves a home.[3:50:50]   It's one of the top comics. Okay. So that's his bit. Tony,[3:50:56]   Tony just now paying attention. Okay.[3:51:00]   Let's see what happens guys. Guys.[3:51:05]   Guys, I'm going to hit rock bottom in real time. You know what I mean? Like,[3:51:10]   I'm like, yeah, I didn't think I was going to be here either. You know,[3:51:13]   like they text their friends when they go home with me and they're like, Oh,[3:51:15]   he's the fun guy from the bar. He's a comedian. Uh,[3:51:19]   and then they have get bad Dick on an air mattress and they're like, Oh my God,[3:51:22]   he's a fucking comedian. All right. It's uh, it's checks out.[3:51:25]   Not getting my laughing from that one. I like when, Oh fuck. All right.[3:51:28]   Thank you. There you go. Okay. So it sets over really.[3:51:33]   I saw Tony go, give him the cat, give him the meow.[3:51:38]   Yeah. We've heard enough. Give him the meow. Okay.[3:51:43]   Watch what Tony did. We all heard his air mattress joke, right?[3:51:46]   Chad is calling it better than prior. Good. Better than prior.[3:51:51]   We all agree. He also has the look of a guy that we like.[3:51:57]   So let's hear now. Let's see what Tony does with this information.[3:52:00]   We all heard the bit. We know the bit front to back. We love the bed.[3:52:04]   Okay.[3:52:07]   Uh, the air mattress bit. All right. Watch what he does.[3:52:09]   The air in the room with your air mattress material there. Colin. Oh,[3:52:14]   fuck. All right. Thank you guys. There you go.[3:52:19]   Really deflated the air in the room with your air mattress material there.[3:52:23]   Colin deflated the air. Why? It wasn't good. Not good enough for you,[3:52:28]   Tony. Okay. You look like you were going to do good.[3:52:32]   You look like a professional. You have a good haircut.[3:52:35]   You have rings on for some reason. You have a open shirt,[3:52:39]   you got a chain, you got a little bit of swag to you,[3:52:42]   and then you just come out and do that. You've been on the show a few times,[3:52:47]   right? Yeah. Like a year and a half ago. It never really goes that great,[3:52:50]   does it? It went pretty decent. I don't think you are.[3:52:54]   I don't think you are at all. It's pretty much it went pretty decent. You said,[3:52:58]   I don't think you are. Okay. But this is coming from Tony.[3:53:01]   His quick wit. He's been practicing for years. He has a story for everything.[3:53:05]   Yeah. Thing he says is always killed, so maybe we should listen to him. Yeah.[3:53:09]   Keep listening to Tony. Remember this guy's completely sucks. His air mattress[3:53:14]   bit was horrible. He's never done well. Okay,[3:53:18]   I calls the one that matters. So I like that. You thought you did good.[3:53:22]   You pulled a little Jared Nathan. You're trying to. I'm not the bad comedian.[3:53:25]   You just saw. Okay, Colin, let's talk about it.[3:53:29]   I actually slept on an air mattress[3:53:33]   when I was coming up in the game and someone's living room and I paid rent to[3:53:37]   sleep on an air mattress and somebody's living room and I once hooked up[3:53:43]   with a chick way out of my league back then.[3:53:47]   And I remember this because I actually have a better story than you. I've never[3:53:51]   told it on stage or anything, but your story, your shitty story reminds me of[3:53:55]   my good story.[3:53:56]   Oh,[3:53:59]   so he's about to tell us a good air[3:54:03]   mattress story. Okay. He's recap.[3:54:05]   The comic said that he's fucking on the air mattress.[3:54:09]   The girl's toenail pokes it and he's getting closer to the floor.[3:54:13]   No, but the actual joke was, he's going, Oh, Oh, and she's going, Oh,[3:54:17]   are you close to coming? And he goes, nah,[3:54:20]   I'm close to the fucking floor with this air mattress because of the leak.[3:54:24]   You stupid fucking bitch. Okay. Which that's the pub side.[3:54:29]   So yeah, she goes, Hey, Oh my God, you're coming close. He says,[3:54:34]   yeah, close to the floor.[3:54:36]   But Tony has one that's way better. Tony has a joke that's way better.[3:54:39]   He's made this very clear. I mean, he's really set the standards high. Let's,[3:54:43]   uh, let's hear him. Let's hear Tony's first stage or anything, but your story,[3:54:48]   your shitty story reminds me of my good story anyway.[3:54:52]   So I ended up here. Here's the good story, right?[3:54:56]   Your shitty story reminds me of my good story.[3:55:01]   And he's about to do shitty story reminds me of my good story anyway.[3:55:05]   So I ended up hooking up with this hot fucking one of those beautiful mixed[3:55:10]   girls with the fucking, you know what I mean? Poofy hair.[3:55:13]   I mean just absolutely stunning. And I remember thinking to myself,[3:55:15]   why is this girl fucking me? I'm a 23 year old door guy at the store.[3:55:19]   I don't have money. I don't have food. This is crazy.[3:55:23]   All I have is this fucking air mattress and my job at the comedy store. Anyway,[3:55:27]   I wake up the next morning,[3:55:28]   she's gone already and I noticed that there's an earring,[3:55:33]   an earring on the air mattress and it's right next to my face. And I go, Oh,[3:55:37]   she left an earring and I grab it and it goes and it starts.[3:55:45]   So this is very early in the morning that this happens and I'm like, Oh fuck.[3:55:50]   So I go back to sleep, right? I'm in the middle of an air mattress. Now,[3:55:53]   what you don't know people with parents that were together jobs and college[3:55:58]   diplomas is that when you sleep on an air mattress and it's actually slowly[3:56:02]   deflating, it doesn't evenly go down.[3:56:05]   Now the middle where you're at goes down and the rest closes on you like a[3:56:10]   Venus fly trap of depression.[3:56:13]   So you end up literally on the hardwood floor,[3:56:16]   but with a bunch of mattress sticking up like that.[3:56:18]   And that part doesn't deflate that doesn't deflate because there's no[3:56:21]   pressure on it. You understand what I'm saying?[3:56:23]   So you end up just enclosed in a fucking hot case that now the sun's coming up[3:56:29]   in Los Angeles and now it's one hundred and thirty degrees.[3:56:33]   Anyway,[3:56:39]   no,[3:56:42]   that is not a good story and look how he ends it.[3:56:47]   That was a lot of words to say a story way worse than his.[3:56:55]   His was 10 seconds long.[3:56:56]   It had the same thing about the air mattress popping and it ended with a punch[3:57:00]   line.[3:57:01]   Can you believe this guy and then he doesn't apologize for that.[3:57:05]   He doesn't have to do anything. He just gets away with this. Not here.[3:57:08]   And after he treated that guy that way about his air mattress story,[3:57:13]   I just can't believe this.[3:57:14]   Well, you got to see this guy's face. So this guy's realizing he goes,[3:57:17]   that's your whole story. Watch this.[3:57:19]   Watch this guy's face when Tony wraps it up.[3:57:23]   Now it's 130 degrees. Anyway,[3:57:28]   I like that. I'm telling. Wow. Cool story.[3:57:34]   You really showed him Tony.[3:57:36]   Everybody find this guy and tell him that air mattress story was way[3:57:41]   shittier. Everyone find this guy. Tell him you're on red bar.[3:57:44]   Mike's a big fan. He says he's never met a comedian like you. Okay,[3:57:49]   let's watch Tony's face as he bombs this away. Anyway,[3:57:55]   I like that.[3:57:55]   I'm telling some real careers really slowing down the comedy part of everything[3:58:02]   share with you some of the unbelievable adventures that I've been on.[3:58:11]   Yo, if I see you, I'm gonna crack your jaw.[3:58:14]   Yup. Oh,[3:58:17]   you are the biggest piece of shit I've ever.[3:58:20]   And also the only reason that Tony remembers that as a really good story is[3:58:24]   because he had sex with a super hot shit, super hot chick.[3:58:27]   He wanted to tell you about his mind.[3:58:30]   That's one of the beginning of the story.[3:58:32]   But then when he realized it was after the hot chick part, he kind of started[3:58:36]   going, Oh, this story actually sucks.[3:58:39]   And he was trying to figure out a way to end it.[3:58:41]   This story better.[3:58:46]   Not better. Look at that. I mean, how embarrassing in front of this guy,[3:58:50]   you just told him how horrible he was. And then you end in this manner.[3:58:53]   So I was a wildly rich and it would be great.[3:58:57]   You should have made fun of him there. You didn't need to, did you look,[3:59:01]   he's happy, you know, and we, he knows, tell him,[3:59:04]   we know her stories here during this episode,[3:59:06]   really slowing down the comedy part of everything out of this.[3:59:09]   Share with you some of the unbelievable adventures that I've been on until I[3:59:13]   was a wildly rich and successful. So let's talk about it. Colin,[3:59:18]   are you really on an air mattress?[3:59:21]   He could feel that running through his whole body right now. Can't he?[3:59:25]   He knows, he knows. And we know, tell everybody.[3:59:33]   See you, Tony fucking loser. Got him.[3:59:38]   So yeah, I just wanted to highlight that moment of his life.[3:59:40]   Make sure everybody knows what he's about. Oh my God.[3:59:42]   So I got three big bombastic babies that I want to do.[3:59:47]   Sure. What you got? One of them is Chris D'Elia.[3:59:50]   One of them is Tom Segura and one of them is club random.[3:59:54]   And I ain't leaving here without those three, but you can pick the order.[3:59:58]   Ladies and gentlemen, Tom Segura.[4:00:02]   Throw in some weed music. We'll take a few puffs, take a few puffs.[4:00:05]   We'll see what Tom did. We'll take a few puffs and see what Tom did.[4:00:09]   Tom Segura has got a new special. Hey, ball hog.[4:00:13]   Sledgehammer. Yep.[4:00:16]   Chief with me. It's red bar.[4:00:18]   Take a few puffs.[4:00:20]   The indeca dominance will make us dominant.[4:00:30]   That kind of music. Is this Dasha? Is this Ivy Loke?[4:00:34]   Is that her name?[4:00:36]   Ivy Loke music.[4:00:41]   It's going to be.[4:00:43]   Oh, yeah, Ivy Loke loves this type of stuff right there.[4:00:48]   Take a few puffs.[4:00:54]   This Billie Eilish.[4:00:59]   New Billie Eilish.[4:01:00]   She's acting weird.[4:01:06]   OK, I got a whole mouth full of indeca, hold on to that.[4:01:13]   Hey, Leela, la, la, la, la, la, la.[4:01:15]   It's a hit record.[4:01:16]   OK, Tom Segura, come on down.[4:01:18]   You're really a fan of Skrillex.[4:01:20]   Whenever I put on a Skrillex song, you get mad.[4:01:22]   Skrillex is not. I'm not into that.[4:01:25]   No, that's so surprising to me.[4:01:27]   Skrillex was a known joke for people like me growing up.[4:01:31]   Yeah, you were two years old.[4:01:33]   Skrillex, when he came out, was a laughing stock.[4:01:36]   He was a Machine Gun Kelly type of people would always make fun of him.[4:01:42]   He was the reason Dubstep got such a bad name.[4:01:45]   No, he was the reason Dubstep got such a bad name.[4:01:48]   People couldn't go that far.[4:01:50]   They did not want.[4:01:51]   He's the reason that Dubstep got a good name.[4:01:53]   And then other. No, no, no.[4:01:54]   I like Dubstep from.[4:01:56]   No, the best some of the best Dubstep is when it was commercialized[4:02:00]   and found in like a Mountain Dew ad.[4:02:02]   That to me is Dubstep.[4:02:05]   Yes, I like after it was commercialized and used in like a ninja[4:02:11]   Twitch promo.[4:02:13]   See, Zander is a Skrillex fan with me.[4:02:14]   Well, I'll tell you, Jules, it's not that I'm not a fan again.[4:02:18]   When he came out, he was if you were any sort of guy,[4:02:22]   you know, who had any integrity, you weren't messing with Skrillex.[4:02:26]   He had a funny name to everybody that name blew people's minds.[4:02:29]   You thought Lady Gaga was bad when this name Skrillex hit the streets.[4:02:34]   We said, no, we've had enough.[4:02:36]   We're not going in this goofy direction.[4:02:38]   You've gotten better.[4:02:39]   But that was you being a boomer back then.[4:02:41]   I'm saying I'm not saying me.[4:02:43]   This is not about me.[4:02:44]   I was not aware of this.[4:02:46]   That's the same as going, oh, Justin.[4:02:47]   Jules, I am.[4:02:48]   Balls. No, no, no, no.[4:02:50]   Listen. Yes. Yes, it is.[4:02:51]   I'm reporting on the culture's stance was no to Skrillex.[4:02:56]   I know, but that's wrong.[4:02:57]   I didn't say if it was wrong or right.[4:03:00]   I said I follow the culture's lead.[4:03:05]   And if they don't like Skrillex, I'm not going to mess with him.[4:03:08]   And to me, this guy was no different than Marilyn Manson,[4:03:11]   who I also was scared of.[4:03:13]   I think Skrillex is cute.[4:03:16]   Just saying. Yeah.[4:03:19]   I just don't and I don't really like his music.[4:03:20]   I find it to be very Arabian.[4:03:24]   I don't like when there's world sounds in my music.[4:03:30]   I don't like other cultures.[4:03:32]   Stay out of India, producers.[4:03:34]   Stay out of India.[4:03:35]   I'll tell you, that's where the Beatles lost me.[4:03:37]   You like an African sound.[4:03:39]   I do so.[4:03:41]   Because we're all from Africa.[4:03:43]   That proves it.[4:03:44]   You know, that's why rap is so popular.[4:03:46]   Africa, there might be something to it.[4:03:49]   These other countries, this Middle East.[4:03:52]   That's bad music.[4:03:54]   Egypt, bad music.[4:03:55]   India, bad music.[4:03:57]   Iran, Iraq,[4:03:59]   Bugabasta, Bugabi,[4:04:03]   Irenistan, all these places that you've heard on the news.[4:04:08]   Regarding George Bush, no good.[4:04:11]   I don't like that sound.[4:04:12]   I don't like Dubai.[4:04:13]   I don't like the flavor of Dubai.[4:04:14]   I don't like the color scheme.[4:04:17]   I don't like any of that.[4:04:19]   I do like the religion.[4:04:23]   I like what this religion is saying,[4:04:24]   where they talk about the big box,[4:04:26]   they pray around the box, whatever that is, I'm in.[4:04:29]   Okay, we'll change this convo[4:04:31]   because now everyone's arguing about Skrillex[4:04:33]   and I don't know enough.[4:04:34]   To me, here's what I mean by all this about Skrillex.[4:04:37]   When I say this about Skrillex,[4:04:39]   he's not something I take.[4:04:41]   He's not anyone I take seriously or listen to.[4:04:47]   When I see him, I go,[4:04:48]   oh, here comes a novelty song to fill up time.[4:04:50]   You would never have spring breakers without him.[4:04:53]   He was the worst part of that movie.[4:04:54]   I wanted that movie to be mostly done[4:04:56]   by a 90s rock rap background music, soundtrack.[4:05:03]   A rock rap soundtrack would have been better.[4:05:08]   Limp Bizkit, 311.[4:05:10]   Yeah, we need like a 311 type movie to come back.[4:05:22]   Soon.[4:05:23]   Soon.[4:05:24]   Everyone's feeling to Blink 182 lately.[4:05:26]   Yeah, as a joke, as a fucking meme.[4:05:30]   You know, real nice.[4:05:33]   Okay, what were we gonna do?[4:05:34]   Tom Segura, come on down.[4:05:35]   Yes.[4:05:36]   Tom Segura.[4:05:37]   I got no problem with Skrillex.[4:05:38]   I don't take it that seriously.[4:05:41]   I don't rate Skrillex.[4:05:41]   I don't pay attention to him though either.[4:05:44]   To me, I see Skrillex is not very important to me.[4:05:46]   Okay, that wasn't the best.[4:05:47]   Never argue.[4:05:48]   That's one of the chat behaviors that I don't like.[4:05:50]   Arguing about music.[4:05:52]   It's not as best.[4:05:53]   I just like to play the new songs that came out this week[4:05:56]   so we can all see what's out there.[4:05:57]   You know, it's good for us.[4:06:00]   Maybe sometimes it's Skrillex.[4:06:02]   Maybe sometimes it's 311.[4:06:05]   Skrillex was in our playlist is what was happening.[4:06:08]   Yeah.[4:06:10]   You're losing your mind.[4:06:12]   That's why this is brought up?[4:06:14]   Thought we were just talking Skrillex.[4:06:16]   Just talking about him.[4:06:19]   Didn't know I had given him air time.[4:06:23]   Have to edit that out.[4:06:25]   Okay, we're doing Tom Segura now.[4:06:27]   Oh my God.[4:06:28]   And you're not gonna believe it.[4:06:29]   Tom Segura's got a new special sledgehammer, right?[4:06:32]   Wait till you hear what sledgehammer's about.[4:06:35]   Very funny.[4:06:35]   He's in the round this time.[4:06:37]   Have you heard comedians speak of the round?[4:06:42]   Very medieval times, being in the round.[4:06:44]   I hate the round.[4:06:46]   It makes me sick hearing comedians talk about the round[4:06:50]   and their way around it.[4:06:54]   Their theory of the round.[4:06:56]   You hear these guys and they all talk about it.[4:06:58]   What's even sicker is when a comedian[4:07:00]   who does these types of theaters is talking to a comedian[4:07:03]   who has not done these types of theaters yet,[4:07:06]   like a Sam Talon.[4:07:08]   But they're talking about the round.[4:07:10]   Oh, there's nothing sicker than the speak of the round.[4:07:12]   I don't like it.[4:07:13]   It makes me dizzy.[4:07:14]   There's so much editing happening.[4:07:17]   For every three cuts that you would have[4:07:19]   in a normal production, you got six for the round.[4:07:22]   Cause the man is spinning.[4:07:23]   Yes, the man has.[4:07:26]   These guys aren't grown up enough for the round yet.[4:07:28]   They're not mature enough for the round.[4:07:30]   So you've got Tom Segura, Joe Rogan.[4:07:32]   Basically running as if it's a treadmill.[4:07:36]   Around the round.[4:07:38]   You know, they're really gonna take advantage[4:07:39]   of seeing everyone.[4:07:40]   It's so great.[4:07:41]   I get to see everyone's face.[4:07:43]   Really lights me up.[4:07:45]   Well, what about the person who's watching you[4:07:46]   and then you instantly turn their back to them[4:07:49]   and move the other way?[4:07:50]   It's very rude.[4:07:51]   Imagine you're watching a stand-up.[4:07:52]   You're like, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.[4:07:54]   And then the guy turns around and walks away.[4:07:56]   That's what's happening in the round.[4:07:58]   But doesn't it look so great on tape?[4:08:00]   I was watching an Ed Sheeran concert video.[4:08:02]   I just was curious to see what it was like.[4:08:05]   Ed Sheeran is on tour right now.[4:08:06]   Now I'm gonna get accused of being Ed Sheeran.[4:08:08]   Well, this is UK.[4:08:09]   People want more UK, they're saying.[4:08:11]   We're getting a lot of listeners in the UK.[4:08:13]   So Ed Sheeran is their biggest band.[4:08:15]   You know, I was curious to see what a stage looked like.[4:08:17]   I clicked the video and he had a round stage[4:08:19]   and the outside is like a treadmill[4:08:21]   and he was literally running.[4:08:22]   He had actually a walkway, an airport walkway installed.[4:08:27]   What do you call those things?[4:08:27]   The treadmill.[4:08:28]   And he was like-[4:08:29]   He had that installed on the outside of his round[4:08:33]   and then he would actually jog it,[4:08:35]   making him going about 26 miles an hour[4:08:37]   down the assisted step or whatever you call it.[4:08:40]   Like imagine if you were on one of those walking things[4:08:43]   at the airport running.[4:08:45]   It's like you're flying like Superman.[4:08:47]   So he was doing that while playing his guitar[4:08:50]   and then running in the middle,[4:08:51]   hitting the looper pedal, of course, that gimmick that he's...[4:08:53]   I can't believe his whole concert is a looper pedal.[4:08:57]   You'll never see me operate a looper pedal.[4:08:59]   I could be doing that all day.[4:09:02]   Doesn't it look like there'd be looper ability[4:09:04]   in this studio?[4:09:05]   There's not.[4:09:06]   And I don't even buy combo pedals that include looper.[4:09:10]   Sometimes you'll buy a reverb.[4:09:11]   Oh, it's also got a looper.[4:09:13]   No, thanks.[4:09:15]   A looper is the biggest gimmick to hit music[4:09:18]   since the round nose of a clown.[4:09:22]   It's as gay as a clown.[4:09:24]   You're sitting there, what are you, a one man band?[4:09:27]   Yes.[4:09:28]   With your looper.[4:09:29]   And then we all have to sit through 27 minutes[4:09:30]   of you setting up the loop that,[4:09:32]   what, isn't gonna really change?[4:09:35]   I want a song that's spastic, going in 800 directions.[4:09:38]   She can't do that with a looper pedal.[4:09:40]   I gotta wait.[4:09:41]   Yeah, I gotta hear you go.[4:09:41]   Do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do.[4:09:44]   Set that.[4:09:46]   Now you're gonna go, dank, dank, dank, dank, dank.[4:09:49]   Set that by the time you've said everything.[4:09:52]   I'm over the song.[4:09:54]   I need a new song.[4:09:55]   These loopers must stop.[4:09:57]   If you see a looper pedal, rip its guts out.[4:10:00]   This concert really blew my mind.[4:10:01]   He had the hugest stage,[4:10:03]   like search Ed Sheeran stadium tour on YouTube.[4:10:06]   His stage looks like it's like an excision EDC dubstep rave.[4:10:11]   And he's just looper pedaling you to death[4:10:13]   with these gay ass chords.[4:10:14]   John Mayer opened for him only on the guitar[4:10:18]   and then him only guitar and looper pedal the whole time.[4:10:21]   That looper pedal needs to fucking stop.[4:10:24]   You know, I hoped it was too tricky to operate[4:10:27]   and most people wouldn't dare.[4:10:28]   He hasn't.[4:10:29]   But no, it seems very easy[4:10:30]   cause they're all operating it perfectly[4:10:32]   without missing a beat.[4:10:34]   I can't even get two of the loops to line up.[4:10:37]   That's why I don't really use one.[4:10:39]   Can't figure that shit out.[4:10:41]   You would have to play with that for weeks and months.[4:10:44]   You should try it for karaoke one night.[4:10:46]   See if you can do the loop.[4:10:47]   I'd have to, it would have to be,[4:10:49]   we would have to play this segment[4:10:52]   as a reminder, like right before the song,[4:10:53]   this would come on.[4:10:55]   You could play one of the ones Joe Kumia does[4:10:57]   and just copy.[4:10:59]   And it's, there's something so pathetic[4:11:01]   about a man triggering his looper pedal for the next loop.[4:11:09]   Oh, is that fucking bad.[4:11:11]   That really makes me fucking sick.[4:11:13]   Okay.[4:11:15]   Tom Segura in the round.[4:11:18]   Okay.[4:11:19]   I'd like it.[4:11:20]   If we could all agree, the round is douchey.[4:11:24]   Right?[4:11:25]   I'd like if we were just, could all start there.[4:11:27]   Even if we don't believe it.[4:11:29]   Let's just all agree to that.[4:11:31]   The everyone's agreed.[4:11:32]   Oh, good.[4:11:34]   We're going to open up Netflix for this one.[4:11:36]   Here he is.[4:11:37]   Come on, ball hog.[4:11:38]   Who's watching?[4:11:39]   Mike.[4:11:41]   I'm proud to say.[4:11:42]   Oh, there he is.[4:11:43]   That's the ice.[4:11:44]   If you hover over anything in Netflix,[4:11:46]   it starts doing the trailer.[4:11:49]   Which by the way,[4:11:49]   have you ever seen a Netflix trailer?[4:11:51]   Now it's like six.[4:11:51]   You have to choose your own length as Jules.[4:11:55]   Jules came up with it.[4:11:58]   A Netflix trailer is now choose your own length.[4:12:00]   I hope people know this.[4:12:02]   Otherwise they'll show you the entire movie[4:12:04]   edited a different way.[4:12:06]   Yeah, seriously.[4:12:07]   If you just keep watching a Netflix trailer[4:12:10]   before you know, you go, this is 24 minutes in,[4:12:13]   but it's still cut like a trailer all the way through.[4:12:15]   And you're going, this is the whole movie times 10.[4:12:18]   I swear I've watched a 10 minute trailer on Netflix before.[4:12:22]   Cause you're just seeing how long it's gonna go.[4:12:24]   And you want to see the end.[4:12:25]   Yeah, so what you do,[4:12:26]   I'll give you a tip is you,[4:12:29]   you access the trailer,[4:12:30]   you go and you hit your timer,[4:12:32]   your stopwatch when that thing hits 10, 15 seconds,[4:12:35]   you stop the trailer.[4:12:37]   Cause they'll show you everything.[4:12:38]   And then you've got to sit through that again.[4:12:41]   And you know how bad it was.[4:12:43]   Imagine having to sit through it twice.[4:12:45]   Isn't that the most cringe worthy thing in the world[4:12:47]   where you're in the movie theater[4:12:48]   and the part from the trailer comes on[4:12:50]   and you're like, I can't even look[4:12:52]   because these people still laugh[4:12:55]   as if they've never heard that part[4:12:57]   that we heard a hundred times.[4:12:58]   And you're going, you're laughing at the trailer line.[4:13:01]   I don't even want to hear the trailer line.[4:13:04]   It will cringe me out so hard.[4:13:05]   I won't be able to watch the movie trailer[4:13:08]   or when it's a song[4:13:12]   and you're like 30 seconds into the song[4:13:14]   and then they fully say the name of the song in the song.[4:13:18]   They're like, ah, yes.[4:13:20]   Yes, when I was in high school,[4:13:21]   me and Danielle had a car rule[4:13:23]   that when the name of the song played,[4:13:25]   you had to change the song.[4:13:27]   That is strange.[4:13:27]   Sometimes it was the first line.[4:13:29]   So Tom Segura is all these things.[4:13:31]   He's on Netflix.[4:13:32]   He's participating in the long trailers.[4:13:35]   Here he is.[4:13:36]   And they've got to make it up.[4:13:37]   Did you see the promo pic?[4:13:38]   Did we have that?[4:13:40]   Yeah, it's in this note underneath it.[4:13:42]   Okay, yeah.[4:13:43]   Look at this poster.[4:13:44]   This was sent to me by many people.[4:13:46]   As you know, we showed you Tom Segura[4:13:48]   when he went a little heavy on the makeup.[4:13:50]   Remember that one, Tom Segura?[4:13:53]   Tom Segura on his last special[4:13:56]   went so heavy with the makeup[4:13:58]   that it, I mean, he looked like a living geisha.[4:14:03]   It was fully, imagine a geisha walking around[4:14:05]   offering you sweet tea or whatever the hell it is they do.[4:14:09]   That's him.[4:14:10]   Imagine the kimono.[4:14:11]   Imagine the chopsticks in the hair.[4:14:13]   That's what I remember it to be.[4:14:16]   It's not an exaggeration.[4:14:19]   A geisha is easier to stomach to look at.[4:14:22]   Which by the way, geisha is number two[4:14:24]   of things I can't stomach.[4:14:27]   But easier to stomach than Tom in that makeup last year.[4:14:30]   Everyone made fun of him.[4:14:31]   He even had to come on record.[4:14:33]   He was very defensive about it at first.[4:14:35]   Did not play along with it.[4:14:38]   It wasn't even his fault.[4:14:39]   So he could have been like, what the fuck did they do?[4:14:43]   You know what I mean?[4:14:44]   And blame the makeup lady, embarrass her.[4:14:47]   But no, he had a lot of real tricky ways out of that one.[4:14:51]   He did blame her in the end.[4:14:52]   He did blame her in the end.[4:14:54]   Of course, you have to.[4:14:57]   Now his new promo picture is out.[4:14:59]   We're all waiting for makeup.[4:15:01]   And remember, I had so many people[4:15:03]   when we did the Tom Segura makeup thing,[4:15:06]   I had so many people in the comments.[4:15:09]   It was crazy.[4:15:10]   Go, dude, everyone wears makeup on TV, you idiot.[4:15:16]   And you would go, oh God, they think I don't know that.[4:15:20]   You know, it would like break your heart to read.[4:15:24]   So I'll say this again.[4:15:25]   Yes, we know that everyone wears makeup on TV.[4:15:31]   I'm in hair and makeup.[4:15:33]   Have my fucking life with this one, this old bitch.[4:15:40]   We were making fun of the fact[4:15:45]   that he was wearing too much makeup.[4:15:49]   You idiots.[4:15:51]   Too much makeup.[4:15:53]   He was wearing a full thing like a geisha.[4:15:55]   Like I said, lipstick plus circles here.[4:15:58]   I mean, there's good makeup and bad makeup.[4:15:59]   Jesus Christ.[4:16:01]   For every gender.[4:16:01]   So in your head, you're on...[4:16:06]   And what if they had never worn makeup on TV then?[4:16:09]   Then what?[4:16:10]   Then he's fully gay?[4:16:12]   We know.[4:16:14]   So what we're making fun of is it's went too far.[4:16:16]   You look like an idiot.[4:16:17]   Get it?[4:16:20]   That's the joke.[4:16:22]   The big joke that we're all laughing at.[4:16:23]   You should try on like a dark taupe lipstick.[4:16:26]   Well, that's what I'm thinking here.[4:16:28]   So can anyone see this?[4:16:29]   Can you feel this?[4:16:31]   It's more of a vibe than a thing you could really point out.[4:16:34]   Oh my God.[4:16:35]   Yes, you can see that.[4:16:37]   I'm trying to go to the right.[4:16:39]   I mean, that looks even crazier.[4:16:40]   Right there.[4:16:42]   So he's not wearing makeup, but they...[4:16:46]   This is a guy popping the paint in the bottom of the gun.[4:16:52]   That's how the special should have started.[4:16:54]   Should have been a name with an airbrush that...[4:16:57]   And then it cuts to this.[4:16:59]   He is fully Moroccanized.[4:17:03]   He looks like one of those light skinned black guys.[4:17:06]   Basketball coming.[4:17:07]   He looks like Shel Silverstein.[4:17:10]   He is fully...[4:17:13]   I like, I can't even...[4:17:14]   It looks like he was checking out like a muffler of a car[4:17:16]   that backfired.[4:17:20]   And now he's just been kind of wearing it all day.[4:17:22]   It looks like shut miners shut.[4:17:26]   It's so sleazy.[4:17:29]   So Moroccan.[4:17:31]   It is so Middle Eastern.[4:17:34]   That looks like the guy that we rented the parking spot[4:17:36]   from Chicago.[4:17:38]   Yes, yes, yes.[4:17:39]   I get you this one.[4:17:40]   Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.[4:17:41]   He does everything through paper receipts.[4:17:45]   And what, didn't we get in some huge incident with him[4:17:47]   where we had to like rip our car out of the spot[4:17:50]   while screaming at him?[4:17:51]   What was that again?[4:17:52]   He was trying to raise the rent.[4:17:55]   So there he is.[4:17:56]   And yes, they've botched it again.[4:17:58]   I can't believe...[4:17:59]   So in the special, it's not like this,[4:18:00]   but for the promo pictures.[4:18:01]   They're calling him Sinbad.[4:18:03]   Yeah, I mean, this is, he could be a genie.[4:18:06]   This is full genie,[4:18:07]   especially with that blue background there.[4:18:11]   So yeah, he's been customized at the very least.[4:18:15]   I'll say that this nigga has been customized at the least.[4:18:18]   The very least.[4:18:19]   Okay, so just like his cars, they done him up.[4:18:23]   They gave him a matte finish.[4:18:24]   No, I'm actually so excited for this segment.[4:18:26]   So this segment is pretty good because...[4:18:30]   Do you guys like a three-peat?[4:18:32]   This is a three-peat.[4:18:33]   And this is because Tom Segura is very big right now.[4:18:36]   He's a big comedian.[4:18:39]   He pretty much doesn't have any big strikes[4:18:41]   against him by anybody.[4:18:43]   You know, there's like this huge scene[4:18:45]   of 30 to 50-year-old men that seem to love Tom.[4:18:52]   Earlier today in the chat, I screenshotted this[4:18:54]   when we were teasing Tom Segura.[4:18:56]   Robin Tran said, Tom Segura is only famous[4:18:59]   because Louis C.K. got canceled[4:19:01]   and they looked a tiny bit similar.[4:19:03]   Wow.[4:19:04]   It could be something like that,[4:19:06]   where they're hoping that Tom's got something[4:19:08]   in the chamber based on this cadence[4:19:10]   that he's been providing and this look.[4:19:13]   You know, that's all I think it is.[4:19:14]   It's like, Tom hasn't really screwed up.[4:19:19]   He's been very, very safe.[4:19:21]   And he's almost giving people...[4:19:25]   From what I talked to,[4:19:26]   because I even got a guy at the fucking rental car place[4:19:28]   or the U-Haul place.[4:19:30]   Yes, one time Mike was wearing a Tom Segura shirt.[4:19:33]   I was wearing Tom Segura's shirt from the podcast.[4:19:39]   And...[4:19:40]   And why were you wearing that?[4:19:45]   Just picked it out of the closet.[4:19:46]   I just picked it out of the closet.[4:19:47]   It's one of my shirts.[4:19:48]   I buy everybody's merch.[4:19:49]   And I wanted a thin shirt for the day[4:19:55]   that I could wear while boxing up a U-Haul.[4:19:58]   Something that I didn't maybe care about.[4:20:02]   So I didn't even realize I was wearing this.[4:20:06]   During the summer when I'm working,[4:20:08]   I literally grabbed from one of the thousands of t-shirts[4:20:11]   stuffed into my home and I put it on and we go,[4:20:14]   as long as it fits and it's not dirty.[4:20:17]   That's the criteria.[4:20:18]   So he brings up Tom Segura[4:20:22]   and obviously I've got the shirt.[4:20:24]   I must love him.[4:20:25]   I didn't even consider this.[4:20:28]   Only talking about it now, Jules,[4:20:30]   did I consider that, oh yes.[4:20:32]   Cause to me, I'm wearing the shirt[4:20:35]   and he knows that I'm the host of this.[4:20:38]   In my mind, I'm operating as if he knows[4:20:42]   I'm just wearing this cause it's stupid.[4:20:45]   Yes. And the guy was like, oh, Tom Segura.[4:20:47]   I love him.[4:20:48]   But of course to him, yeah, of course to him,[4:20:52]   if I'm wearing a Tom Segura shirt to him[4:20:54]   and he doesn't know me, he doesn't know I'm red bar.[4:20:57]   So to him, he's gone, this guy loves Tom Segura.[4:21:01]   So he starts pouring his heart out to me about Tom Segura[4:21:03]   and I'm like, yeah, we fucking hate him.[4:21:06]   We actually.[4:21:08]   And the guy was like, oh, okay.[4:21:11]   And then he's like, you know, yeah.[4:21:15]   I started explaining how we have a show[4:21:16]   or something like that, but I couldn't believe,[4:21:19]   yeah, I guess now it makes all the perfect sense.[4:21:21]   No wonder this guy.[4:21:23]   Cause I'm like, why is this guy telling me[4:21:25]   that Tom Segura like in this way, you know,[4:21:30]   this guy needs to shut the fuck up about this shit.[4:21:33]   But it was really good.[4:21:34]   I think my head was more so really excited[4:21:41]   by this idea that like, here is, this is what the fan is.[4:21:45]   Like, this is a real fan.[4:21:47]   I'm putting a face to it.[4:21:49]   And this face happened to be a really schlubby,[4:21:51]   like out of work musician vibe, 40 year old fucking loser,[4:21:58]   bald, whiny, little Moby, little bitch,[4:22:03]   fucking 40 year old schlub guy.[4:22:06]   You know these guys?[4:22:08]   There's many around.[4:22:11]   And yeah, they love Tom Segura,[4:22:15]   but you go, why do they love him?[4:22:17]   Cause Tom never really, you watch all Tom's stuff[4:22:20]   and it's very, it's almost like it would,[4:22:27]   in our minds we go, oh,[4:22:28]   but he must've done something really big[4:22:30]   and huge and funny once.[4:22:32]   And this is just like chill stuff surrounding[4:22:35]   the huge funny stuff that happens somewhere else[4:22:38]   that we haven't seen, right?[4:22:40]   But no, we've watched all his specials.[4:22:43]   We never see this part where you would go,[4:22:46]   why are 40 year old men all in love with him?[4:22:49]   So yeah, maybe it's like that.[4:22:52]   They're hoping, they're doing,[4:22:55]   they're hoping this is the guy, right?[4:22:58]   They're hoping this is the funny guy.[4:22:59]   They're wishing and throughout all that hoping and wishing,[4:23:03]   they're just allowing him to be the guy standing in[4:23:07]   for no one at the moment, right?[4:23:10]   He's the easiest pill to swallow,[4:23:12]   to hold them over for now.[4:23:15]   But they say that they like him.[4:23:17]   Well, those guys are gonna be pretty disappointed today[4:23:19]   because we've caught Tom,[4:23:21]   who has had really no big strikes to his name.[4:23:24]   This is bad.[4:23:25]   Might wanna cut to me for this.[4:23:27]   We've caught Tom Segura red handedly with proof,[4:23:34]   stealing three full jokes.[4:23:40]   Nobody has talked about this.[4:23:42]   We saw a simple comment on Reddit.[4:23:44]   Jules, why don't you explain to people[4:23:46]   this comment on Reddit you saw,[4:23:48]   how it tipped us off to what we have found.[4:23:50]   I did see a tiny, tiny down-voted comment[4:23:52]   on the Your Mom's House Reddit.[4:23:54]   Is this it here?[4:23:55]   Yes, so I wanna, don't spoil it though.[4:23:57]   Oh, okay.[4:23:58]   Oh, okay, yeah, it's gonna spoil it, good.[4:24:00]   But shout outs to Luscious Johnny on Reddit.[4:24:03]   And you're probably a Tom fan,[4:24:05]   but this is all on you, bro.[4:24:07]   Okay, and which ones,[4:24:09]   how many did he call out of the three?[4:24:12]   Just the first two.[4:24:13]   And then the third one is one that I noticed.[4:24:16]   So should I say the names of the three comedians?[4:24:19]   I mean, I think we could do them one at a time.[4:24:20]   I think you should start with-[4:24:21]   One at a time,[4:24:22]   but then I really wanna reiterate the big three[4:24:24]   and I need you to hear this sentence as one.[4:24:28]   I think we should see the intro of Tom's special[4:24:30]   and then move on to the-[4:24:32]   Okay, three big comedians, by the way.[4:24:35]   Three big comedians, three big jokes.[4:24:40]   How many did that guy predict you said two?[4:24:42]   Yes.[4:24:43]   And then how did we find the third one?[4:24:45]   That was when you came up with, right?[4:24:46]   I did.[4:24:47]   So one of these is Jules herself.[4:24:50]   One of the three busts that we have today is Jules herself.[4:24:53]   I mean, don't give me too much credit.[4:24:55]   It's pretty obvious.[4:24:56]   Well, nobody else is talking about it.[4:24:59]   Okay, here it is.[4:25:00]   Tom Segura, Sledgehammer.[4:25:02]   We're so sorry, Tom, but this is bad.[4:25:06]   You might need to call a lawyer.[4:25:09]   Tom, here he comes.[4:25:12]   He doesn't need to call.[4:25:16]   It's going to be very exciting.[4:25:18]   Here comes a Netflix comedy special.[4:25:20]   Netflix should have this removed.[4:25:22]   You'll see why.[4:25:25]   Or a drink.[4:25:26]   His coming everywhere world tour.[4:25:29]   Hope not with those stolen jokes.[4:25:31]   You got a new set, you got to work out here after this.[4:25:34]   There he comes.[4:25:35]   Oh no.[4:25:38]   Okay, it's an intro with some video footage[4:25:40]   and some photos of Tom[4:25:43]   with very famous celebrities.[4:25:47]   A montage, in fact, of Tom with celebrities.[4:25:53]   I can't actually believe that.[4:25:54]   So the intro of his standup special[4:25:57]   is just him meeting celebrities looking really cool[4:26:00]   in black and white in hotel waiting rooms, in lobbies.[4:26:06]   So he really wants us to know, this is good to keep in mind.[4:26:09]   He wants us to know he's connected.[4:26:11]   He's pretty connected, Jules.[4:26:13]   He's a celeb now.[4:26:14]   Okay, you thought he was just some nerd comic.[4:26:16]   He's separating himself from the other comics now,[4:26:19]   letting the Netflix audience show,[4:26:20]   no, this isn't just some comic.[4:26:22]   I'm hanging out with Brad Pitt.[4:26:25]   I'm hanging out with LeBron.[4:26:27]   I'm like one of the culture's most accepted comics.[4:26:32]   Okay, so I'm trying to really establish that here and now.[4:26:36]   Okay, he wants to really push over.[4:26:39]   Santino, get these other guys out of here.[4:26:41]   I'm the head comic, is what he's trying to say.[4:26:44]   Okay.[4:26:45]   Cheers.[4:26:46]   To Tom Segura.[4:26:47]   Whoo![4:26:57]   Sledgehammer.[4:27:00]   It's a sledgehammer.[4:27:07]   Thank you very much.[4:27:08]   Thank you, everybody.[4:27:12]   They love him.[4:27:13]   Thank you, please.[4:27:16]   Take a seat.[4:27:17]   Be seated.[4:27:18]   Thank you so much.[4:27:19]   Thanks for coming out.[4:27:21]   The classic Tom Segura weird outfits.[4:27:25]   Look at this coat.[4:27:27]   Would you ever put this coat on, Jules?[4:27:29]   Look at this coat.[4:27:30]   He's getting his clothes tailored now.[4:27:32]   Did you hear about this?[4:27:34]   If you listen to Two Bears, One Cave,[4:27:36]   he brags about how he gets all his clothes tailored.[4:27:39]   And guess what, Jules?[4:27:41]   What?[4:27:42]   Game changer.[4:27:45]   Yep.[4:27:45]   Okay.[4:27:46]   He gets his clothes tailored now.[4:27:48]   And guess what, Bert?[4:27:49]   Game changer.[4:27:52]   This is a guy who likes to say game changer[4:27:54]   at the end of something[4:27:55]   that costs a lot of money to pull off.[4:27:58]   So he's getting his clothes tailored now.[4:28:01]   So he thinks this is a nice look.[4:28:02]   He thinks you could just get any shitty clothes now[4:28:04]   and tailor them.[4:28:06]   And then that's the secret.[4:28:07]   Well, yeah, sure.[4:28:08]   If you want to look like you're on ABC, nigga.[4:28:12]   You look like a stock guy from one of the networks[4:28:17]   at seven, at around six or seven p.m.[4:28:19]   I could see on some shitty show that I know nothing about[4:28:23]   where the wardrobe department has a very limited budget[4:28:27]   and they've dressed everybody plain.[4:28:31]   That's what you look like.[4:28:32]   All right, here he is,[4:28:33]   introducing himself in the beautiful round.[4:28:37]   Yeah, man.[4:28:39]   We're here.[4:28:47]   Let me ask you guys something, man.[4:28:48]   Are they gonna keep taking our Confederate statues down[4:28:52]   or what?[4:28:57]   So Tom does this thing too.[4:28:59]   I hope this doesn't fool many.[4:29:03]   He has a thing that he does[4:29:07]   where he wants to include 10 shocking things per special[4:29:13]   that are like, dude, I can't believe he said that.[4:29:16]   That's so gross out shocking guy.[4:29:21]   But that's not really Tom's personality.[4:29:24]   It's not really his vibe.[4:29:25]   So Tom sits there with Christina[4:29:27]   and the likes of these people and they come up with,[4:29:30]   they dream up.[4:29:31]   What would make the crowd go, oh, oh no.[4:29:36]   And they concoct these things that,[4:29:38]   it's not in his personality.[4:29:40]   Yeah, the Confederate flags.[4:29:42]   Yeah, let's, no, no, no.[4:29:43]   He's trying to just throw in little things here and there.[4:29:47]   So you go, oh, he's pretty fucking.[4:29:49]   This guy's sick.[4:29:50]   He's twisted, twisted in the head.[4:29:52]   Him and Christina like to do this.[4:29:54]   They're hanging on to this dream[4:29:56]   that they're kind of like a edgy, dark, twisted comics,[4:30:01]   but they're really not.[4:30:02]   They're very plain.[4:30:03]   They're very ordinary people.[4:30:08]   I'm just taking the temperature of the room.[4:30:10]   I don't know who's here, you know.[4:30:12]   Ugh.[4:30:15]   That's a weird one to start.[4:30:17]   All right.[4:30:17]   Is that hair hand coming out?[4:30:19]   Is he one of these guys who's got that hair hand[4:30:21]   that you see real dark coming out of the clothes?[4:30:23]   Oh yes.[4:30:24]   Really?[4:30:25]   That disgusts me.[4:30:26]   His body really revolts me.[4:30:28]   These fat guys don't get it.[4:30:30]   Once you've gone fat, you're done.[4:30:33]   Lose all the weight you want.[4:30:34]   You look just as gross to us.[4:30:37]   Your body is deformed now.[4:30:39]   Your skeleton is all out of whack.[4:30:42]   So when you shrink down, you start looking all weird.[4:30:45]   You got this weird wrist.[4:30:47]   When I see his wrists, I get like nauseated.[4:30:50]   That has to do with getting huge and fat[4:30:52]   and then lose it all the weight.[4:30:55]   Being fat for so many years and then losing all the weight.[4:30:57]   You get stuff like wrist nauseation.[4:31:00]   You get stuff like, is his back weird?[4:31:04]   Does he have a weird back?[4:31:07]   You start looking like Louis Litt.[4:31:09]   Yeah, I've been on this phenomenal tour.[4:31:12]   I'll show you this wrist.[4:31:13]   I've met people that I've never thought[4:31:15]   I would meet in my life.[4:31:16]   Recently, I met-[4:31:17]   There it is.[4:31:18]   Wait.[4:31:19]   Just there.[4:31:20]   Oh.[4:31:20]   All right.[4:31:22]   Yeah, I've been on this phenomenal tour[4:31:25]   and I've met people that I've never thought[4:31:27]   I would meet in my life.[4:31:29]   Recently-[4:31:30]   There it is.[4:31:31]   Oof.[4:31:32]   These are lines of hair, as you're saying?[4:31:34]   Starting out like the wolf man?[4:31:37]   I think so.[4:31:38]   Are those just three long hairs that I'm seeing?[4:31:41]   I don't know.[4:31:42]   It's too blurry to see.[4:31:44]   Like what I'm hoping for is this is spiked hair shooting out.[4:31:48]   Like a comb over that's going to the side.[4:31:49]   Yeah, like a comb over, yeah.[4:31:52]   Either way, listen, I'm distracted.[4:31:54]   I'm not paying attention to the comedy.[4:31:55]   Tom, I'll tell you right now.[4:31:56]   You need to get wrist surgery.[4:31:59]   Sorry.[4:32:00]   Yep.[4:32:01]   That's the only way.[4:32:02]   I'm so distracted as an audience member.[4:32:04]   You care about the crowds.[4:32:07]   You want us laughing, right?[4:32:08]   Get that wrist surgery.[4:32:10]   Your comedy will be, you'll be getting a lot more laughs.[4:32:13]   People can't pay attention.[4:32:15]   Get that in his head.[4:32:17]   I met a supermodel, which is wild,[4:32:20]   because, well, I don't think she wanted to meet me.[4:32:22]   I should be clear about that.[4:32:23]   Okay, so this is how we open.[4:32:25]   Fancy hotel in Toronto and somebody that worked there,[4:32:29]   you know, they go to her, they're like,[4:32:30]   hey, he's a comedian.[4:32:31]   Shoes they gave him.[4:32:33]   Where'd you get these shoes?[4:32:34]   Zara on the bottom underneath the shirts.[4:32:36]   There's these shoes sitting there.[4:32:38]   Where'd you get these shoes?[4:32:40]   A store that just sells clothes and you got tricked[4:32:42]   and thought that you could buy the shoes too.[4:32:44]   Like, okay.[4:32:45]   Banana Republic shoes.[4:32:48]   Is that where you got those?[4:32:49]   Or did they come with the jacket?[4:32:51]   Oh, that's, oh, I get it.[4:32:53]   You know, he's, so he got.[4:32:55]   Extra fabric from tailoring the jacket.[4:32:57]   Yeah, because his shoes, now I get it.[4:33:01]   Cause I'm so dumb.[4:33:02]   He's got gray shoes to match the gray jacket.[4:33:06]   That looks good.[4:33:09]   It's a sick look.[4:33:10]   And you thought you were really pulling off something here?[4:33:14]   You thought you were coordinating?[4:33:18]   Sebastian, what do you think?[4:33:20]   It's pretty good.[4:33:21]   Are you trying to coordinate?[4:33:26]   Yikes.[4:33:27]   Why?[4:33:28]   What have I done?[4:33:29]   What have I done?[4:33:31]   Yeah, that just got, your whole look disgusts me.[4:33:32]   I find it laughable.[4:33:34]   If I saw you, I'd push you into a bush[4:33:36]   to sully up all your fucking new clothes.[4:33:39]   Hey, what the fuck, man?[4:33:40]   I just got this jacket.[4:33:42]   Yeah, now you're in a bush covered in dirt and blood.[4:33:46]   And then they go, she's a supermodel.[4:33:48]   I was like, I can see.[4:33:49]   He's bragging.[4:33:51]   This isn't the bad stuff.[4:33:52]   And what struck me is that they are so much better looking[4:33:55]   than you think they're going to be.[4:33:57]   Like, you know, you see in a magazine or on your phone[4:34:00]   and you're like, she's pretty, but in person,[4:34:02]   you're like, what the fuck is happening right now?[4:34:05]   So it's a bunch of bull like this where he thinks[4:34:07]   that he's jet setting all over town and going to hotels.[4:34:10]   So let's start with the one of the three, shall we?[4:34:15]   I mean, I can't believe we're covering three.[4:34:17]   Usually all I got to show you is one stolen bit,[4:34:19]   case closed, we all celebrate.[4:34:22]   We all party all fucking weekend.[4:34:24]   We rent out hotels, we celebrate, we tell everyone we know.[4:34:29]   And, but what do we do on a day where we have three[4:34:33]   full bus, wait, what do they call it[4:34:36]   when it's just a half bath?[4:34:40]   I guess a half bath.[4:34:42]   So I guess you would call it just a-[4:34:43]   2.5 bath.[4:34:45]   Two and a half bus.[4:34:47]   One is just a half bus.[4:34:49]   Good enough for me.[4:34:51]   So two, three full little bus here.[4:34:55]   You know, one of them, you could go, okay,[4:34:57]   if it was just this one that we're talking about,[4:35:00]   we would let it slip.[4:35:01]   But these two are just irredeemable.[4:35:03]   And when the comedy community finds out about this,[4:35:06]   they're going to go fucking nuts.[4:35:07]   Okay, I guess we'll start with joke number one.[4:35:09]   Give me that time code.[4:35:11]   Well, do you want to show the other one first?[4:35:13]   What order do you want to do it in?[4:35:15]   Oh, I don't know.[4:35:16]   Do we tell?[4:35:17]   Yeah, this is tricky too.[4:35:18]   Listen, man, I've never been presented with three in a row.[4:35:22]   So you go, what do you do?[4:35:23]   Do you show the original first?[4:35:25]   No, I think you show Tom's first.[4:35:28]   And then you show the original, right?[4:35:29]   Is that how they do a bus typically?[4:35:31]   A joke steal bust.[4:35:33]   I want to do it the most traditional way[4:35:35]   that YouTube likes it done.[4:35:38]   That's how I want to do it.[4:35:40]   I think, okay, then we can do Tom's first.[4:35:42]   And remember if you're watching, this is a clip.[4:35:44]   Hey, we didn't clip this[4:35:45]   and you don't come to red bar for quick news.[4:35:49]   You know, this is a story of my life.[4:35:52]   And then, you know, it's intertwined with this.[4:35:55]   You know, you're in the wrong spot.[4:35:59]   So we apologize for the weights, for the people.[4:36:00]   I could see people on YouTube flipping the fuck out[4:36:03]   right now, especially now that I'm even going even longer[4:36:06]   than I have to, not showing them the stealing part.[4:36:08]   I mean, they're fucking losing their,[4:36:09]   don't put this in, clippers.[4:36:11]   They'll lose their minds[4:36:13]   and they'll start unsubbing from your channel.[4:36:15]   You'll lose revenue on this, not me.[4:36:18]   She'll cut it out.[4:36:20]   Don't annoy them that way.[4:36:22]   That's why we don't want you clipping.[4:36:25]   But I mean, for now we do.[4:36:28]   But usually we don't want you clipping[4:36:29]   because you leave stuff like this[4:36:31]   and you're driving people insane.[4:36:33]   But Mike, what about the regular listeners[4:36:35]   who have to listen to this?[4:36:38]   What about them?[4:36:39]   Okay, what is our first quote?[4:36:40]   Okay, go to 730.[4:36:42]   730.[4:36:44]   Here it is.[4:36:45]   And we'll watch Tom's joke first[4:36:46]   and then we'll show you the stolen one.[4:36:49]   It doesn't matter.[4:36:50]   Here he is.[4:36:52]   It's here's joke.[4:36:52]   And then a hot chick will walk by[4:36:55]   and I'll go, get the fuck out of here.[4:36:56]   What do you know?[4:36:57]   I think the gayest I ever was[4:37:06]   was in February.[4:37:09]   That's when I did my shows in Los Angeles[4:37:11]   and Brad Pitt came to my show.[4:37:14]   Woo, okay.[4:37:16]   The gayest he ever was[4:37:18]   was when Brad Pitt came to his show in LA.[4:37:23]   Why was he gay?[4:37:24]   Let's hear some more.[4:37:26]   Brad Pitt came to his show.[4:37:28]   I do not know what year he was born[4:37:31]   or how many infants he consumes in a week,[4:37:33]   but that man is stunning, all right?[4:37:37]   I've never heard this take on Brad Pitt.[4:37:39]   So guys think he's attractive to them.[4:37:43]   Brad Pitt, are you sure?[4:37:45]   We're talking about the same guy?[4:37:47]   Cause every guy I hear keeps telling me[4:37:49]   about how they went gay for this Brad Pitt.[4:37:55]   I had never heard anything like that.[4:37:58]   So he's just so beautiful of a guy.[4:38:00]   Is that what they're saying?[4:38:01]   That seems to be it.[4:38:04]   So Tom is one of these guys[4:38:05]   who's just gonna go with the basic,[4:38:07]   Brad Pitt is so beautiful.[4:38:09]   It like literally turned me gay.[4:38:10]   He's like literally mixed with a bunch of doves[4:38:14]   or some shit.[4:38:15]   Listen to this crap, look.[4:38:16]   I do not know what year he was born[4:38:19]   or how many infants he consumes in a week.[4:38:21]   Oh, how many?[4:38:22]   He must consume infants, he's so beautiful.[4:38:25]   This is the kind of talk[4:38:26]   you want your father to hear you say?[4:38:29]   Okay.[4:38:31]   All right, so he's doing this.[4:38:32]   We've heard this routine before, haven't we?[4:38:36]   It's stunning, all right?[4:38:38]   He came into my dressing room.[4:38:39]   I couldn't make eye contact.[4:38:41]   Do you understand?[4:38:41]   Can't make eye contact.[4:38:42]   I was like, hey, what's going on?[4:38:43]   Too hot.[4:38:44]   How you doing?[4:38:46]   He goes, look at me.[4:38:47]   I was like, no.[4:38:51]   Okay, that's a cool celebrity story.[4:38:53]   Have we heard this one before?[4:38:54]   Was that the whole story?[4:38:56]   Now we should show you where we've heard it before.[4:38:58]   I think so.[4:38:59]   Okay, now this is the lightest one of the load, okay?[4:39:02]   We're starting easy here.[4:39:04]   This is light.[4:39:05]   This one could have been overlooked.[4:39:09]   This one's not gonna send him to jail on its own.[4:39:12]   But when you see all three combined,[4:39:15]   this one needs to be shown.[4:39:16]   And this one happens to be from his Theogate nemesis,[4:39:19]   Theo Vaughn.[4:39:20]   So it turns out Theo Vaughn has a similar[4:39:25]   setup here.[4:39:26]   He has a similar idea here.[4:39:28]   And by the way, Tom doesn't do jokes.[4:39:30]   He does setups.[4:39:33]   If you actually edited a tape[4:39:34]   of all Tom Segura's punchlines,[4:39:38]   there's really nothing there at all.[4:39:41]   His punchlines, there's really nothing there.[4:39:43]   He's getting credit for good setups,[4:39:48]   but he's never delivering a punchline,[4:39:50]   which is what a joke is.[4:39:51]   So he actually doesn't do jokes.[4:39:53]   People go, oh man,[4:39:54]   I love his joke about the woods.[4:39:56]   Wait, wait, wait.[4:39:57]   You love his setup, actually, about the woods.[4:40:00]   The joke at the end was because I'm gay.[4:40:04]   It's like nothing.[4:40:07]   The end of his jokes mean nothing.[4:40:11]   But you do remember the setup.[4:40:13]   So you're thinking in your head,[4:40:14]   oh, you had a fun time with the Tom show.[4:40:16]   And then you're going, he did the joke on the woods,[4:40:18]   the car, the this.[4:40:19]   No, he did the setups of those things.[4:40:23]   Okay, so that's what we're judging here today.[4:40:25]   Tom's setups, that's what we call his jokes.[4:40:28]   Okay, got it.[4:40:29]   Where is this Theo Vaughn?[4:40:31]   It's the next link.[4:40:32]   Theo Vaughn, Brad Pitt bit.[4:40:34]   Okay, here it is.[4:40:35]   Well, I had some jokes planned for you guys,[4:40:37]   but I have to scrap them[4:40:39]   because I have to tell you what happened.[4:40:40]   I met Brad Pitt, okay?[4:40:43]   The real-[4:40:44]   Not enough to me is too much.[4:40:45]   If you're Tom Segura, professional comedian,[4:40:48]   three hours of fucking day[4:40:50]   telling me about how you do the craft,[4:40:54]   you can't have the same anything[4:40:58]   as one of your good friends within the last five years.[4:41:02]   Okay, you just can't.[4:41:04]   Sorry.[4:41:05]   See, that's how strict I am.[4:41:06]   If you want to be big shot Tom Segura, Joe Rogan,[4:41:09]   you're talking about the craft[4:41:10]   every fucking minute of the day,[4:41:14]   then you can't say the same thing[4:41:18]   that your buddy just said, okay?[4:41:20]   You can't say the same thing as anybody just said.[4:41:22]   It's gotta be new.[4:41:23]   So this would be bad enough, just this part.[4:41:25]   Good to be here, beautiful crowd.[4:41:27]   I had some jokes planned for you guys,[4:41:29]   but I have to scrap them[4:41:30]   because I have to tell you what happened.[4:41:32]   I met Brad Pitt, okay?[4:41:34]   The real Brad Pitt, okay?[4:41:36]   Not the fake Brad Pitt,[4:41:37]   the only one God ever made, met him, okay?[4:41:41]   This is what happened.[4:41:41]   Very similar.[4:41:42]   Listen up, haters.[4:41:45]   So it's a beautiful day out, okay?[4:41:47]   Because Brad only lives on beautiful days.[4:41:50]   Same type of thing.[4:41:51]   You know, does this guy eat babies?[4:41:53]   How does he look so good?[4:41:55]   He's sculpted by God, the same old shtick.[4:41:59]   Okay, was that?[4:42:00]   That's the baby one, right?[4:42:02]   Yes.[4:42:03]   Okay, let's get to where it really gets into trouble.[4:42:05]   That's just showing you that, you know,[4:42:06]   he heard Theo Vaughn talk about Brad Pitt,[4:42:09]   decided he now talks about Brad Pitt too.[4:42:13]   I would have avoided that.[4:42:15]   I would go, oh, Theo's done that already?[4:42:17]   Scrap it.[4:42:18]   Cancel that.[4:42:21]   Cancel it.[4:42:23]   That's what I would have said[4:42:24]   if I was a professional comedian.[4:42:26]   You know, making millions and millions of dollars[4:42:28]   off this stuff.[4:42:29]   It's going to Netflix.[4:42:30]   The whole world's gonna say,[4:42:31]   I'm not gonna do anything that Theo Vaughn just did.[4:42:34]   Okay.[4:42:36]   All right, what's our next time code?[4:42:37]   Next, you wanna go to 1955.[4:42:40]   1955.[4:42:42]   So if you're clipping this,[4:42:43]   you should do this out of order.[4:42:44]   You're sure like a preview of the worst one, you know?[4:42:47]   The worst one's last.[4:42:48]   The worst one's gonna be last.[4:42:50]   So I, you know, these Tom fans,[4:42:51]   they're gonna come up with excuses all the way through[4:42:53]   for this part,[4:42:56]   which we can't have them do.[4:42:57]   Okay, 1940 what?[4:42:59]   55.[4:42:59]   1955.[4:43:02]   All right, here we go.[4:43:03]   At the same time,[4:43:05]   I have a monitor on the nightstand for the little guy,[4:43:08]   right?[4:43:08]   This dude stands up in bed.[4:43:11]   Okay, he's doing a sun bit.[4:43:12]   Lot of suns bits in this new special.[4:43:15]   Very family.[4:43:16]   Very, a lot of bits where these would be great things[4:43:20]   to say to another kid's parents[4:43:23]   while you're picking your son up from school.[4:43:26]   That's kind of the level of the stories[4:43:29]   Tom's gonna tell about his kids.[4:43:30]   The kind of stuff you would say[4:43:31]   if you were at a soccer meet,[4:43:34]   some other asshole dad sitting there,[4:43:35]   you got nothing to talk about.[4:43:38]   So why not tell a funny story about your stupid kid?[4:43:42]   Very funny.[4:43:42]   And a lot of people love this humor.[4:43:44]   We found that the comments really loved the kid stuff.[4:43:49]   That's the opposite of anything I'll love, okay?[4:43:52]   This kid stuff is so dang light,[4:43:55]   it doesn't even need to be spoken in an Uber.[4:43:58]   Really, it's the lightest of the light[4:44:00]   should not be in a special.[4:44:02]   So here he is talking about his kids,[4:44:04]   referring to him as he here.[4:44:07]   His little boy.[4:44:08]   At the same time,[4:44:09]   I have a monitor on the nightstand for the little guy,[4:44:12]   right?[4:44:13]   The kid stands up in bed and he goes,[4:44:16]   what was that?[4:44:17]   Oh, that's the kid's voice you're going with.[4:44:23]   What was that?[4:44:26]   It's so familiar.[4:44:27]   Where have I heard that?[4:44:28]   Let's hear this again.[4:44:29]   So he's doing a little funny voice for the kid.[4:44:32]   He's not doing a kid's voice.[4:44:34]   He's not going,[4:44:35]   Tada, can you come and wash my little bow?[4:44:39]   He's doing a wacky kid voice,[4:44:42]   a little wackier than your normal Marky, let's say.[4:44:47]   And for the little guy, right?[4:44:48]   This dude stands up in bed.[4:44:51]   He goes, what was that?[4:44:55]   I don't really want to repeat it.[4:44:56]   It's very offensive to me.[4:44:58]   So now I drag my ass into his room.[4:45:02]   He's standing there with his three-year-old gut out.[4:45:04]   You know how they're all like,[4:45:11]   Not funny.[4:45:12]   What, you own a Chevron?[4:45:13]   Why do you stand like that, dude?[4:45:15]   Listen to that roar.[4:45:19]   I go, what?[4:45:20]   He goes, what was that?[4:45:22]   This is the kid.[4:45:23]   I go, what was what?[4:45:24]   He goes, that.[4:45:27]   I go, what's that?[4:45:28]   He goes, what was that?[4:45:29]   I go, I don't know what the fuck you're asking.[4:45:34]   He goes, was that a choo-choo?[4:45:37]   I said, what?[4:45:38]   He goes, was it a choo-choo?[4:45:43]   So he goes, is this kid adopted?[4:45:45]   He's from some other country, maybe?[4:45:47]   Now, you know how you know it's bad.[4:45:49]   The second that he said the first, what was that?[4:45:52]   The entire chat exploded with Delia, Delia, Delia.[4:45:55]   Really?[4:45:56]   So they guessed it.[4:45:57]   They knew right away.[4:45:58]   We don't even have to show.[4:45:59]   Yes, he is doing Chris D'Elia's patented,[4:46:03]   disgusting, despicable kid voice.[4:46:07]   Yes.[4:46:08]   Then at the end of the movie,[4:46:10]   there's this really cute moment[4:46:12]   where the little kid in the movie[4:46:13]   looks up to Kazam, Shaquille O'Neal,[4:46:15]   and this is what he says.[4:46:17]   I just want you to know that[4:46:21]   I consider you my friend.[4:46:23]   Ooh, Tom![4:46:25]   Oh my god.[4:46:27]   Bullhog![4:46:29]   How could you not know that?[4:46:30]   You stole disgraced comedian,[4:46:33]   that's what ABC called him this morning.[4:46:36]   You stole disgraced comedian Chris D'Elia's kid voice[4:46:44]   who's not allowed to do Netflix anymore[4:46:47]   because of his.[4:46:48]   So you thought you would take the kid voice.[4:46:49]   So you thought, I guess I could do that.[4:46:51]   Chris is no longer allowed on Netflix.[4:46:56]   Wanna hear that again?[4:46:57]   Then at the end of the movie,[4:46:59]   there's this really cute moment[4:47:01]   where the little kid in the movie[4:47:02]   looks up to Kazam, Shaquille O'Neal,[4:47:04]   and this is what he says.[4:47:06]   Um, I just want you to know that, um,[4:47:10]   I consider you my friend.[4:47:13]   Amazing.[4:47:15]   Chris D'Elia using his kid voice.[4:47:16]   See, it's even a clip of somebody.[4:47:18]   And this is what she says.[4:47:19]   She says, well, I was wondering,[4:47:22]   um, do you want to see a secret garden?[4:47:28]   Oh, he's disgusting.[4:47:31]   I mean, this is so his voice,[4:47:33]   that's all I had to do on YouTube[4:47:35]   was search Chris D'Elia kid voice,[4:47:37]   and there was a kid voice.[4:47:38]   Remember Logan Paul.[4:47:40]   Logan Paul had tried to lift this as well a few years back.[4:47:43]   He tried to hijack this.[4:47:45]   I think he even knew that's too far.[4:47:48]   So what's, what's going on, Tom?[4:47:50]   Are you forgetting?[4:47:53]   Are you, I could see Tom thinking[4:47:55]   he's come up with all this on his own.[4:47:58]   I could see Tom being so swept up[4:47:59]   with his momentum in the cars[4:48:02]   that he's not taking any time to think.[4:48:05]   And these things that are coming so easy to him,[4:48:08]   it's not that he's a genius comedian,[4:48:09]   it's that he's being very lazy[4:48:12]   and not realizing that he had just heard[4:48:15]   his friends all say these same things.[4:48:17]   Let's hear that kid voice.[4:48:18]   He goes, was that the Chit-Chu?[4:48:20]   You go back to when he goes, what was that?[4:48:22]   Cause that one was like so the same.[4:48:25]   It's insane.[4:48:26]   Dragged my ass into his room.[4:48:28]   He's standing there with his three-year-old gut out.[4:48:30]   You know how they're all like,[4:48:38]   I'm like, what do you own a Chevron?[4:48:39]   Why do you stand like that, dude?[4:48:42]   Took you back to the worst part.[4:48:45]   I go, what?[4:48:46]   He goes, what was that?[4:48:49]   There it is.[4:48:49]   I go, what was what?[4:48:51]   He goes, that.[4:48:52]   So you do Chris D'Elia child material.[4:48:55]   That's fucking disgusting.[4:48:58]   Of all the material of Chris's that you would do,[4:49:00]   why child material?[4:49:02]   How are you not, aren't you mortified?[4:49:05]   I mean, if I were you, I would literally call Netflix,[4:49:07]   go, we have to edit this.[4:49:08]   I've made a huge mistake.[4:49:11]   You need to put out a statement for these two.[4:49:14]   Now we've got one more.[4:49:17]   It goes further, sure.[4:49:20]   Steal Chris D'Elia's voice,[4:49:22]   a voice that was taken from him.[4:49:25]   You know, at least Chris D'Elia's a nice guy[4:49:28]   to take from him.[4:49:30]   You know, just despicable.[4:49:31]   And then your friend Theo Von,[4:49:33]   does Theo know that you're doing a big Brad Pitt joke now?[4:49:36]   Washing his down the shore?[4:49:41]   I don't know if Theo loves that.[4:49:43]   Does Theo like that?[4:49:44]   Do you want everybody showing this to Theo back to back?[4:49:46]   Is that what you want?[4:49:47]   Theo was mad when he found out that, who was it?[4:49:51]   The show Dave stole his jokes?[4:49:53]   Theo gets mad when somebody even does a little bit of Theo.[4:49:57]   So he might be mad.[4:49:58]   I mean, it was very minor, but it should be, again,[4:50:02]   as a comic, as professional as yourself,[4:50:04]   you should go, hey, Theo talked about Brad Pitt.[4:50:06]   What else we got?[4:50:08]   That's it.[4:50:09]   There shouldn't be,[4:50:10]   you shouldn't just be accidentally[4:50:12]   doing the same setup as him.[4:50:13]   Okay, so here's-[4:50:14]   Now for the next one,[4:50:15]   I think maybe we should show the other one first.[4:50:17]   I don't know why I'm feeling that.[4:50:18]   Really?[4:50:18]   I don't know.[4:50:19]   No, okay, you can show us first.[4:50:20]   Go to 2430.[4:50:22]   2430, okay.[4:50:23]   Yeah, I understand what you mean.[4:50:26]   And that's kind of why you gotta just go back and forth.[4:50:28]   It's just one of those moments.[4:50:30]   2430?[4:50:31]   2430, now this is a little joke[4:50:33]   about Tom being in the shower with his son.[4:50:36]   Tom is in the shower with his son[4:50:39]   when he notices something.[4:50:43]   Then he looks up at me and he goes,[4:50:45]   you have a big penis[4:50:49]   and I have a small one.[4:50:52]   I go, well, that's because mine's hard, buddy.[4:50:58]   I'm in the shower with my son.[4:51:00]   He goes, you have a big penis.[4:51:03]   I have a small one.[4:51:04]   Why, daddy, why?[4:51:06]   And the misdirection is,[4:51:07]   well, that's because I'm hard, son.[4:51:10]   Ha ha ha, I can't believe it.[4:51:12]   He's crazy, he's crazy.[4:51:14]   When I talk about making love with these kids,[4:51:16]   people get all mad,[4:51:17]   but Tom talking about the dick with his kid,[4:51:21]   that's fine, he's hard with his kid.[4:51:23]   I mean, people did not like it[4:51:24]   when Balenciaga joked around[4:51:25]   about messing around with kids, so okay.[4:51:29]   People are saying he stole this from Daddy Wash My Front.[4:51:32]   Wow, yeah, I mean, this is an old joke.[4:51:34]   I mean, talking about dicks with little kids.[4:51:37]   However, he did not steal it from me.[4:51:41]   Let's, should we hear him just say it one more time?[4:51:44]   Let's hear him say it one more time.[4:51:45]   For a minute, I'm like, can you wet me?[4:51:51]   Then he looks up at me.[4:51:53]   He goes, you have a big penis.[4:51:57]   And I have a small one.[4:52:00]   I go, well, that's because mine's hard, buddy.[4:52:05]   Look at him accepting laugh.[4:52:07]   He's accepting laugh.[4:52:09]   Ooh, they get so happy when crowds laugh at them.[4:52:15]   It's like, it's crazy.[4:52:18]   Even if they know joke, not theirs.[4:52:20]   Can I read this comment I screenshotted from Reddit?[4:52:24]   MashTheGash2018 says, I was at the taping.[4:52:29]   Before the show started,[4:52:30]   they gave us instructions on how to laugh[4:52:33]   and really overdo it because it's a taping.[4:52:35]   Wow.[4:52:36]   Kind of took me out of the experience.[4:52:38]   Ooh, you hear that, Tom?[4:52:40]   Instructing people to laugh.[4:52:42]   And they think they can hide behind, it's a taping.[4:52:45]   It's a taping.[4:52:46]   We're allowed to act as shitty as we want.[4:52:49]   We're allowed to act as shitty as the shows[4:52:51]   that me and Rogan talk about are so dead on network TV.[4:52:55]   Right?[4:52:56]   Remember when you and Rogan sit around[4:52:57]   talking about how network TV is so stupid and so fake.[4:53:02]   And here you are doing network's TV's biggest crime,[4:53:09]   telling people to laugh[4:53:11]   when maybe they wouldn't have laughed for real.[4:53:14]   I mean, that's a huge crime on humanity[4:53:16]   to take a man's laugh like that,[4:53:19]   to try to use it to manipulate us into laughing[4:53:23]   and taking our laugh.[4:53:25]   Why?[4:53:26]   Cause it's a taping.[4:53:27]   It needs to be perfect.[4:53:28]   Well then be perfect.[4:53:31]   But it's a taping.[4:53:32]   We need people laughing.[4:53:33]   Well then make them laugh.[4:53:35]   Well, it's a lot easier if we just tell them[4:53:39]   to laugh at every time it sounds like a joke[4:53:41]   and laugh super loud so that it's good for the taping.[4:53:46]   Your own son has told us this on Reddit.[4:53:50]   And that was on the Your Mom Sows Reddit.[4:53:52]   So that was your fan.[4:53:53]   That's your fan.[4:53:54]   It's disgusting.[4:53:56]   And it shouldn't be,[4:53:56]   yes, I get it, they do that at tapings.[4:53:58]   They shouldn't.[4:53:59]   Here, play Tom's One More from 2430.[4:54:01]   2430.[4:54:03]   Just so we don't forget.[4:54:04]   Yeah, of course.[4:54:05]   Oh, Tom.[4:54:07]   Whoa, he's dancing.[4:54:09]   He looks up at me.[4:54:11]   He goes, you have a big penis.[4:54:15]   And I have a small one.[4:54:18]   I go, well that's cause mine's hard, buddy.[4:54:23]   That look he get, ooh, biting his lip.[4:54:27]   Biting his lip like a little Jewish kid getting money.[4:54:31]   Disgusting, man.[4:54:33]   You getting some money from your father for free?[4:54:37]   It's pretty fucking sick, isn't it?[4:54:39]   You gonna put that in your bank or spend it?[4:54:42]   It's going in the bank, isn't it?[4:54:44]   Fucking Jew.[4:54:45]   Okay, let's see who he stole that from.[4:54:48]   Now, some of you might not remember this guy,[4:54:49]   but we've got great video.[4:54:52]   Ladies and gentlemen, Jimmy Pardo.[4:54:55]   You remember Jimmy Pardo?[4:54:57]   He is, wow, he really looks like Aaron M.M. Holt here.[4:55:02]   Doesn't he?[4:55:04]   Jimmy Pardo is a short little guy.[4:55:06]   I think he's 5'4".[4:55:07]   I'm not joking, 5'4".[4:55:10]   Real loud mouth, real asshole guy.[4:55:12]   He used to be around a lot.[4:55:13]   I totally forgot about this guy.[4:55:15]   Is he still up to anything?[4:55:16]   He used to be doing podcasts and all that stuff.[4:55:20]   He was trying to be in the scene.[4:55:21]   I do not know this person.[4:55:23]   What time are we going to here?[4:55:24]   2.40. 2.40.[4:55:26]   Here it is, here's Jimmy Pardo, 2.40.[4:55:30]   Because about four months ago,[4:55:31]   I was babysitting my nephew[4:55:33]   and I was giving him a bath.[4:55:34]   And he asked, Uncle Jimmy,[4:55:36]   why is my penis different than yours?[4:55:38]   And I said, well, yours isn't erect.[4:55:40]   Ooh.[4:55:48]   I guess I forgot to laugh.[4:55:50]   This is bad, Tom.[4:55:54]   This is bad.[4:55:56]   Did you hear that folks?[4:55:58]   That folks, but I can relate to this story[4:56:00]   because about four months ago,[4:56:02]   I was babysitting my nephew and I was giving him a bath.[4:56:05]   And he asked, Uncle Jimmy,[4:56:06]   why is my penis different than yours?[4:56:09]   And I said, well, yours isn't erect.[4:56:16]   What do you think?[4:56:17]   Yes.[4:56:20]   They're on tape folks.[4:56:21]   Jimmy Pardo did it first.[4:56:25]   Tom knows.[4:56:27]   Tom knows that's three.[4:56:29]   That's technically three Tom.[4:56:31]   Three steals in one special is pretty bad.[4:56:34]   Theo Vaughn, Chris D'Elia and Jimmy Pardo[4:56:37]   have all been stolen from[4:56:40]   so that Tom Segura could profit[4:56:42]   on his new Netflix special, Sledgehammer.[4:56:46]   Will Tom address these allegations?[4:56:50]   Pretty damning, huh?[4:56:51]   And almost the rest of the special[4:56:53]   other than those parts were Tom telling a big long story[4:56:55]   about how he took an edible and then was really high.[4:56:59]   And then followed by a 20 minute story[4:57:01]   about how his mom took an edible[4:57:03]   and was really high.[4:57:04]   Have you heard this?[4:57:05]   This is something else that needs to stop in this industry.[4:57:08]   We don't care if you took an edible[4:57:11]   unless you ended up cutting off your sister's head[4:57:16]   with a saw.[4:57:17]   Don't tell your edible story.[4:57:21]   We don't care.[4:57:23]   We don't care.[4:57:24]   We've heard it all.[4:57:26]   They told me you could handle this.[4:57:28]   I was like, yeah, whatever.[4:57:30]   I took it an hour later,[4:57:32]   I take some more and then all of a sudden.[4:57:35]   And he set up the two stories the exact same way[4:57:37]   where he was like,[4:57:39]   I thought I was getting 10 milligrams from Joey Diaz,[4:57:42]   but then it was like 200 milligrams and I went crazy.[4:57:47]   And then he goes into another story about his mom[4:57:49]   and I kind of thought he was gonna do a story[4:57:51]   about how his mom can eat as many edibles as she wants[4:57:54]   and she's still a bad ass or something.[4:57:56]   But he told the same story.[4:57:58]   He was like, my mom asked for 10[4:58:00]   and then she asked for 40 and then she went crazy.[4:58:03]   She was talking out loud.[4:58:06]   I mean, it was crazy.[4:58:08]   What's so crazy about talking out loud?[4:58:10]   It's like that.[4:58:11]   It's not crazy.[4:58:13]   Like one of his punchlines about the Joey Diaz one,[4:58:15]   he was like, I was leaving the comedy club.[4:58:18]   I had to put my hand on someone's shoulder[4:58:20]   so they could leave me out.[4:58:23]   This is how you tell an edible story in 2023.[4:58:25]   Just so you know.[4:58:26]   You're allowed to tell people this happened.[4:58:28]   This is how you do it.[4:58:29]   Sorry, I'm late.[4:58:30]   Yeah, I took an edible.[4:58:31]   I was like, anyway, what's up?[4:58:34]   That's it.[4:58:35]   That's how important it is now.[4:58:37]   You tell it like that to a guy at work[4:58:40]   as you clock in late.[4:58:43]   You don't bring it to this stage.[4:58:45]   You don't bring it to the podcast world anymore.[4:58:47]   We know.[4:58:49]   We're fully aware of what edibles do to these fucking faggots.[4:58:57]   Do you agree?[4:58:58]   What do you think?[4:58:59]   773-239-4322.[4:59:02]   The agreement line.[4:59:03]   Call in.[4:59:05]   Tell us how much you agree.[4:59:07]   Well, there it was.[4:59:08]   Tom Segura stealing three jokes.[4:59:09]   You want to chief to that?[4:59:10]   Put on some nice musical.[4:59:11]   I do kind of have to do a tiny short.[4:59:14]   I can sneak behind.[4:59:14]   We'll take a break.[4:59:15]   I'll sneak behind the bathroom break.[4:59:16]   No, no, no.[4:59:17]   We'll take a quick little break.[4:59:18]   We got to air down.[4:59:19]   I'll be right back.[4:59:20]   We'll be right back in a second on Red Bar.[4:59:22]   Hang tight.[4:59:22]   Don't go anywhere.[4:59:28]   It's a shame.[4:59:34]   It's a shame.[4:59:39]   It's a shame.[4:59:44]   It's a shame.[4:59:49]   Wherever you go, I'll go with you.[4:59:55]   Whatever you smoke, I'll smoke with you.[5:00:00]   Whatever you pose, I will take your picture even though I just[5:00:06]   wish I was in it, just have something to remember.[5:00:11]   Lit our cigarettes with studying thoughtfulness,[5:00:16]   dreamed of higher consciousness, but really wanted the opposite.[5:00:21]   Who unscrewed the bottle and poured it?[5:00:24]   Who's onto the plane?[5:00:25]   Who gives a damn about all the constant wealth?[5:00:29]   I just wanted to know your name.[5:00:31]   It's a shame.[5:00:32]   It's a shame.[5:00:34]   But all in love is fair, and it's a shame.[5:00:38]   It's a shame.[5:00:40]   It's pain we have to bear, and it's a shame.[5:00:43]   It's a shame.[5:00:44]   When you got no one left to blame, and you say, don't go.[5:00:51]   You're already there.[5:00:53]   It's a shame.[5:00:54]   It's a shame.[5:00:58]   It's just a shame.[5:01:00]   It's a shame.[5:01:01]   It's a shame.[5:01:03]   It's a shame.[5:01:04]   It's a shame.[5:01:08]   It's just a shame.[5:01:11]   It's a crying shame.[5:01:14]   Whatever you pay, I'll pay for you.[5:01:19]   Wherever you lay, I'll lay on your head Whatever you say, I will do the octave[5:01:29]   Even though you don't care much for harmony I just wanted to give you the option[5:01:35]   We're drinkin' woman eyes We're fuckin' with fetish eyes[5:01:40]   We get clean and testify We relapse in the justified way[5:01:46]   So many teal and jobs when no one calls the prayer And I guess some love it just crystallizes[5:01:54]   Some stays in the air and it's a shame It's a shame[5:01:59]   You just can't get along and it's a shame It's a shame[5:02:04]   Things just turn out wrong and it's a shame It's a shame[5:02:09]   When you got nothing left to say And so you put it in a song[5:02:14]   But you only wanted to explain It's a shame[5:02:22]   It's just a shame[5:02:28]   It's a shame[5:02:33]   It's just a shame[5:02:36]   It's a cryin' shame[5:02:39]   It's a shame[5:02:44]   It's just a shame[5:02:49]   It's a shame[5:02:54]   It's just a shame[5:02:58]   It's a cryin' shame[5:03:09]   Like a cocktail[5:03:11]   Baby, baby, baby, baby, baby, baby, baby[5:03:19]   Just like the good news of the moon[5:03:23]   Baby, baby, baby, baby, baby, baby[5:03:33]   Baby[5:03:39]   One feelin'[5:03:43]   Trees bloomin'[5:03:47]   Warm winds[5:03:51]   Hot summer[5:03:55]   Strangin' glasses[5:03:59]   Roamin' thin[5:04:03]   Don't make me slip[5:04:08]   Not fail[5:04:09]   Not this time[5:04:12]   Chunky[5:04:14]   Chunky for grudges with me up low[5:04:18]   Put me in the cold rain but I just can't fake it[5:04:22]   See my eyes swell[5:04:24]   See the skies swell and light up this moon[5:04:29]   Because I never want to fall in love[5:04:33]   Never[5:04:34]   I never want to fall in love[5:04:37]   Never[5:04:38]   Never want to fall in love[5:04:41]   Ah, ah, oh, oh[5:04:49]   Never[5:04:50]   La, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la[5:04:54]   I got it[5:04:55]   La, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la[5:04:58]   Welcome back, you sanctimonious pricks[5:05:01]   What's up, Rob?[5:05:02]   La, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la[5:05:05]   You sanctimonious prick[5:05:07]   You ever heard something like that before?[5:05:09]   Well, welcome back, hi, welcome to Redbar[5:05:12]   I'm going to show you this, this edit[5:05:15]   I've done it again[5:05:17]   So[5:05:18]   Don't rush[5:05:19]   Thank you[5:05:21]   You like touch[5:05:23]   Never too much[5:05:25]   I got to show you this amazing edit that Xander made[5:05:28]   And this is to be used in every reply to every tweet[5:05:33]   Josh Denny tweet[5:05:35]   No, but this could be a good one to use in Josh's replies when he[5:05:40]   When he starts showing off, starts bragging about comedy[5:05:44]   Remember we saw[5:05:45]   You don't have to give him hell every second of every day[5:05:47]   No[5:05:48]   Let him get his thoughts off[5:05:49]   Yeah[5:05:50]   But if he starts going[5:05:51]   Oh, I'm the greatest comedian since Carlin[5:05:54]   Well, he's been doing that a lot lately[5:05:56]   Nobody can step to me[5:05:58]   We saw Josh Denny's sit-down comedy special[5:06:01]   Where he was doing all new stuff[5:06:03]   To the Flat Earthers[5:06:05]   People were appalled by that[5:06:07]   People really couldn't believe it[5:06:09]   That was such a great tape to play[5:06:12]   It really, it really summed up Denny so nicely[5:06:17]   In case maybe some people, you know, didn't really realize how bad it was with Denny[5:06:22]   That was a good one[5:06:24]   And Xander's actually gone through[5:06:26]   He got a copy of that tape that we were watching here[5:06:29]   He found out that the whole thing is old material[5:06:33]   All of it[5:06:34]   We'll show you a clip from that[5:06:36]   This is pretty good[5:06:37]   And grab the link[5:06:39]   Is it in the chat?[5:06:41]   Yeah, put it in the chat[5:06:42]   Put the link to this in the chat[5:06:43]   So that everybody can save this in a little notepad[5:06:46]   You save this in your notepad[5:06:48]   If you're ever seeing Josh Denny bragging or showing off[5:06:51]   Or talking about how he's such a great comic[5:06:54]   You'll have the link[5:06:55]   You could use it in the reply[5:06:57]   It would be great[5:06:58]   It would be great if people started using this every time they saw him getting a fight on Twitter[5:07:02]   With other people[5:07:03]   Send the link to everybody fucking fighting with[5:07:06]   I mean this is really an embarrassing one for Josh[5:07:10]   And I think it's got a lot of[5:07:12]   What do they call it when you've got a lot of real world purpose[5:07:16]   For the video[5:07:18]   Some, you know, it's got some[5:07:20]   There's a word for that that people love[5:07:22]   Okay, here it is[5:07:24]   I'll show you the intro here to Xander's video about Josh Denny[5:07:28]   Hack[5:07:29]   Adjective[5:07:30]   Not interesting or funny[5:07:32]   Lacking significance through overuse[5:07:35]   Unoriginal and trite[5:07:37]   Josh Denny is a hack comedian[5:07:39]   So you do that night after night until you get 10, 20[5:07:43]   And then after you get 20 minutes[5:07:45]   And you've done it a few times[5:07:47]   If you have the discipline[5:07:49]   You stop doing those jokes[5:07:50]   And you start again with a new 20[5:07:52]   You stop doing those jokes[5:07:53]   You stop doing those jokes[5:07:55]   You stop doing those jokes[5:07:57]   Louis C.K. there in the intro[5:07:59]   The secret just comes out and goes, hey[5:08:03]   Have any of you ever thought about fucking a retarded chick?[5:08:06]   Hey[5:08:07]   Have you guys ever thought about fucking a retarded chick?[5:08:10]   So this is great[5:08:11]   It jumps through all the eras[5:08:13]   Showing you him doing the same material year after year[5:08:18]   Some dating back to 2012[5:08:21]   Maybe even earlier[5:08:23]   Here I keep landing[5:08:24]   There's 2012[5:08:26]   2015[5:08:28]   It's a real good back to back[5:08:30]   It's one of those[5:08:31]   10 minutes long[5:08:33]   And then you're pretty much seeing his whole set[5:08:35]   That he's been using his whole life[5:08:39]   So there it is[5:08:40]   To anybody that needs to know what Josh's comedy is like on Twitter[5:08:43]   Go to like 955[5:08:46]   That's my favorite part of this video[5:08:48]   This is just a great way[5:08:49]   Because this is his current act[5:08:51]   This is Josh's current act[5:08:53]   You remember he's been lying[5:08:55]   Saying he's been doing new stuff[5:08:57]   He's got a special coming out[5:08:59]   But this is his current act[5:09:01]   And his current act[5:09:03]   Is the same act[5:09:05]   That he's been doing since he started[5:09:07]   So if you want to see Josh's full act[5:09:09]   Here it is and you'll actually get to see it[5:09:11]   Through the years here[5:09:13]   What did you say, 9?[5:09:15]   Like 955[5:09:17]   955, wow[5:09:19]   I mean it's all good but this is my personal favorite Josh joke[5:09:22]   My little cousins are half ginger, dog[5:09:26]   We love this one[5:09:28]   I know your struggle, bro[5:09:30]   Fuck a potato famine[5:09:32]   Potato famine[5:09:35]   It's a teachable moment though[5:09:37]   We prefer the term Cinnamon American[5:09:39]   We prefer the term Cinnamon American[5:09:41]   We prefer the term Cinnamon American[5:09:43]   We prefer the term Cinnamon American[5:09:45]   Doesn't matter if you're born in cinema[5:09:48]   Emigrated here, it's about our history[5:09:50]   And our heritage[5:09:53]   Because like Josh, if you're not from cinema[5:09:55]   Doesn't matter[5:09:57]   It's about our heritage[5:09:59]   I fucking love this one[5:10:03]   Very fucking cool, thank you Zander[5:10:05]   That might be my number one favorite joke[5:10:07]   Cinnamon American, yeah people died when that one happened[5:10:09]   We love that one, Cinnamon American[5:10:12]   And you can hear it, he's been doing that one since he started comedy[5:10:15]   Very nice[5:10:17]   There he is, the Chris Rock Slayer[5:10:19]   Josh Denny, share that with everybody[5:10:21]   Get that link in rotation[5:10:23]   How many views? 1k views[5:10:25]   This should be every person Josh knows[5:10:27]   Should have a nice view with this one[5:10:29]   Gavin McInnes[5:10:31]   Get everybody involved, tag everybody[5:10:33]   Go crazy[5:10:35]   Okay, make a huge mess[5:10:37]   Go nuts with that one[5:10:39]   And forever[5:10:41]   Thank you so much to Zander[5:10:43]   Old Leo Dominique[5:10:45]   He's the best[5:10:47]   I wonder if Leo Dominique has the brain power of Zander[5:10:50]   You know, like can he do all these mathematical[5:10:52]   I fear Zander so much[5:10:54]   But do you think Leo Dominique has all the brain power of Zander[5:10:57]   The mathematics and all that stuff[5:10:59]   I don't think he has the mathematics[5:11:01]   But I do think he has an artistic flair[5:11:04]   Should we do what Tony does and make[5:11:06]   Him go up against each other[5:11:09]   And then have the audience vote[5:11:11]   To see who's the smartest[5:11:13]   I would never do that[5:11:15]   By the way[5:11:17]   And I hate to even compare the two[5:11:19]   I don't see what Leo Dominique is doing to be anything[5:11:23]   Close to what Zander has done[5:11:29]   They're just known guys[5:11:33]   Leo Dominique, we gotta remember to do that[5:11:37]   When we launch this show, Jules[5:11:39]   Remind me to put up the new Leo Dominique banner[5:11:41]   And in fact we're looking for that very banner[5:11:44]   So if somebody wants to design[5:11:46]   A very high end, remember department store look[5:11:50]   And it just says Leo Dominique[5:11:53]   Like a jewelry store[5:11:55]   You know, Leo Dominique[5:11:57]   It's a bridal shop even[5:12:00]   Think bridal, think high end[5:12:03]   Think engagement[5:12:05]   People are saying Leo can analyze well[5:12:07]   Don't downplay him[5:12:09]   I don't know anything about him[5:12:11]   Everything I know about him is a hope[5:12:14]   Really?[5:12:16]   Okay, we're gonna do this one next[5:12:18]   Who did we have?[5:12:19]   Did I wanna do any more of my little guys[5:12:21]   Or should we get into[5:12:23]   Chris D'Elia[5:12:25]   Let's do it[5:12:27]   We caught Chris D'Elia doing some despicable stuff[5:12:29]   This is what he's been up to[5:12:31]   Of course he was on Ricky's[5:12:33]   Cast[5:12:35]   No, George Danko[5:12:37]   Yeah, yeah, yeah[5:12:39]   This is so much better[5:12:41]   You're losing it[5:12:43]   No, this is so much better[5:12:45]   Yes, Ricky's was Brian Khaled[5:12:47]   Of course[5:12:49]   But Chris was on Ricky's[5:12:51]   Doing the crying[5:12:53]   Yes, that was a tape we showed a few weeks ago[5:12:55]   Yes, but that tape is also included today[5:12:57]   So that's where I get confused[5:12:59]   Yes, this is way better[5:13:01]   Chris D'Elia was on George Janko's[5:13:03]   Podcast[5:13:05]   Is that a next step now?[5:13:07]   This is so good[5:13:09]   This is so good and so wrong[5:13:11]   At the same time[5:13:13]   This was really creepy[5:13:15]   And wait till you hear some of the stuff we found[5:13:17]   Chris was not having a good time with this one[5:13:21]   Chris is gonna realize a lot of shit in real time here[5:13:23]   He's with George Janko and his girlfriend[5:13:25]   Jen Janko[5:13:27]   Jen Janko[5:13:31]   What is his girlfriend's name again?[5:13:33]   Sarah Kimberly Potter[5:13:35]   Shawna Della Rica[5:13:37]   Otherwise known as Belle[5:13:39]   Shawna Della[5:13:41]   Dash Rica[5:13:43]   Like Puerto Rico[5:13:45]   Della Rica[5:13:47]   Have you ever had a Della Rica banana?[5:13:49]   From the little Mexican place down the street[5:13:51]   Through the 30 cent bananas[5:13:53]   They're awful[5:13:55]   I'm taking Leo under my wing[5:13:57]   He will replace me after Denny sits on me to death[5:13:59]   This is perfect[5:14:01]   How old is Leo?[5:14:03]   He's about 13, 14[5:14:05]   How old is Leo? I never even thought of that[5:14:07]   He could be anywhere from 12 to 42[5:14:09]   Hey Leo are you there? What's your age?[5:14:11]   Yeah Leo we need that age[5:14:13]   We need an ID[5:14:15]   I want to strip search Leo[5:14:17]   Okay here it is[5:14:19]   It's George Janko[5:14:21]   Should I show this little intro here?[5:14:23]   Or should we wait till their show actually starts?[5:14:25]   I'm used to go 48 seconds is the real beginning[5:14:27]   I hate those intros[5:14:29]   But I gotta say if someone[5:14:31]   cut me crying into an[5:14:33]   interview or an interlude[5:14:35]   Yeah Chris[5:14:37]   did you ever think that the part where you're[5:14:39]   fake crying here using the[5:14:41]   Abrams method of course[5:14:43]   More on that coming up soon[5:14:45]   Of course the standard Abrams[5:14:47]   method for[5:14:49]   crying in cinema[5:14:51]   You know[5:14:53]   which is fully on display right here[5:14:55]   Did you ever think that this is gonna[5:14:57]   be cut into George's little[5:14:59]   fun intro?[5:15:01]   Yo meet Chris D'Elia[5:15:03]   And then it's just clips of you crying[5:15:05]   Did you ever think about that?[5:15:07]   Clips of you crying while promoting[5:15:09]   Celsius a drink which[5:15:11]   snuck its fucking way into[5:15:13]   the club[5:15:15]   They snuck right in, didn't they[5:15:17]   Celsius? Nobody asking any[5:15:19]   questions about Celsius[5:15:21]   It just happens to be in every gas station[5:15:23]   across the country now and we're just[5:15:25]   okay with that[5:15:27]   You know how long that used to take for a brand[5:15:29]   to break through and be everywhere[5:15:31]   All of a sudden we're just all[5:15:33]   okay with Celsius[5:15:35]   Every can of Celsius is completely[5:15:37]   different graphic design than the next[5:15:39]   We were at an old tire shop[5:15:41]   the other day, don't ask why[5:15:43]   and I was drinking a Celsius[5:15:45]   and the tire shop[5:15:47]   70 year old man went[5:15:49]   The 70 year old man at the tire shop[5:15:51]   Oh is that Celsius? That's pretty good[5:15:53]   I love that flavor of Celsius[5:15:55]   You're 70[5:15:57]   So this is the drink that like[5:15:59]   Charlie Jordan made popular[5:16:01]   by drinking it twice at the beach[5:16:03]   and now all of a sudden[5:16:05]   it's everywhere, it's the grossest[5:16:07]   can, you can't have a white can like this[5:16:09]   The word[5:16:11]   Celsius is hideous[5:16:13]   and we just all allow it, now we pretend this[5:16:15]   can's fine, okay, Chris D'Elia's crying[5:16:17]   in front of a Celsius[5:16:19]   You're enough, you know[5:16:21]   because you're you[5:16:23]   Hey guys, welcome back to the George[5:16:25]   Janko show, I'm very excited to introduce[5:16:27]   our guest today, his name is Chris[5:16:29]   You look absolutely[5:16:31]   stupid[5:16:33]   You thought I was going to say[5:16:35]   stunning, didn't you? No[5:16:37]   We saw some old footage of Janko[5:16:39]   He used to look so cool[5:16:41]   Why would you do[5:16:43]   your hair and beard like this[5:16:45]   while wearing headphones and those eyebrows[5:16:47]   Do you[5:16:49]   Do you not understand why this is wrong?[5:16:51]   You cannot look like this[5:16:53]   It doesn't need to be explained, look how[5:16:55]   stupid and gay you look Welcome back to the George Janko[5:16:57]   show, I'm very excited to introduce our[5:16:59]   guest today, his name is Chris[5:17:01]   D'Elia The fact that I can't physically[5:17:03]   do anything about this is[5:17:05]   insane[5:17:07]   What was that video we were watching the other day?[5:17:09]   Because I got to see that cool Janko again[5:17:11]   Yeah, I know, he did not[5:17:13]   look this perverse[5:17:15]   Even just a year ago[5:17:17]   I mean, he's really getting[5:17:19]   so weirdly[5:17:21]   He was cool before[5:17:23]   Yeah, no wonder I liked him before and hate him now[5:17:25]   I mean, really[5:17:27]   this is straight out of Dubai[5:17:29]   Not the good part[5:17:31]   Why would you want to look like that, George?[5:17:36]   Why would you want to look like this?[5:17:38]   I found the cool George[5:17:40]   We got to show you what he looked like just seven months ago[5:17:42]   I mean, it's crazy[5:17:44]   Wait till you see the difference[5:17:46]   Stuff like that bothers me[5:17:48]   Sorry, I'll get caught up all day on a guy[5:17:50]   Some guys[5:17:52]   it's just based on[5:17:54]   look like this they give once[5:17:56]   and I'll hate their guts for[5:17:58]   fucking life[5:18:02]   Look at his fucking face[5:18:04]   Just kidding, I need to bully him to death[5:18:06]   Sorry, it's the only way[5:18:08]   It's the only way out of this[5:18:10]   We're going to show you, yeah, do we have a timecode of this?[5:18:12]   His seating position to the right[5:18:14]   Oh my god, wait till you see the difference here[5:18:16]   You're not going to believe this[5:18:18]   I got to really do some zoom in here for this one[5:18:20]   So we all saw how George looked, right?[5:18:22]   Look at him there[5:18:24]   Look, he's cool[5:18:26]   I took the guest[5:18:28]   Making it much harder for George to engage in the conversation[5:18:30]   The obvious imbalance between George, Logan, Mike, and George[5:18:32]   Then he turns, yeah, now he's back to fucking[5:18:34]   What? What are you selling me?[5:18:36]   Really, it's like the worst look a guy could possibly have[5:18:38]   Yeah, he's changed a lot[5:18:40]   Okay, so let's go back to George[5:18:45]   He's introducing the show[5:18:47]   He's got his favorite comedian on[5:18:49]   Chris D'Elia, if you can believe it[5:18:51]   If you guys haven't seen his standup[5:18:53]   Please, pause what you are doing[5:18:55]   And go watch his standup[5:18:57]   But if you guys have seen him[5:18:59]   You guys are in for an amazing podcast today[5:19:01]   We have some funny moments, we have some deep moments[5:19:03]   So buckle up, like and subscribe[5:19:05]   And enjoy today's interview with Chris D'Elia[5:19:07]   It's too loud in my headphones[5:19:09]   Is it?[5:19:11]   It's too loud in my headphones[5:19:13]   It's too loud in my headphones[5:19:15]   Is it?[5:19:17]   It's so loud[5:19:19]   I can hear your thoughts[5:19:21]   Here they are[5:19:23]   That's better[5:19:25]   The weird face had such a concern in it[5:19:27]   It was so loud[5:19:29]   But now it's good[5:19:31]   Did you even check my headphones before?[5:19:33]   This is how it starts[5:19:35]   It was so loud[5:19:37]   Interesting, you see[5:19:39]   Chris got a big smile all of a sudden[5:19:41]   I wonder what brought that smile[5:19:43]   Let's rewind the tape[5:19:45]   Let me check dude[5:19:47]   It was so loud[5:19:49]   Two people[5:19:51]   hysterically laughing[5:19:53]   This makes[5:19:55]   Chris happy[5:19:57]   He lights up[5:19:59]   Physically[5:20:01]   He can go from sick to healthy[5:20:03]   When two people[5:20:05]   laugh, it doesn't matter if it's a joke[5:20:07]   If he meant it to be funny[5:20:09]   It doesn't matter why they're laughing[5:20:11]   When someone[5:20:13]   laughs at Chris' joke[5:20:15]   He feeds[5:20:17]   off of it[5:20:19]   It's like a video game where you're[5:20:21]   grabbing some fucking juice off the ground[5:20:23]   and you're doing all this stuff for health[5:20:25]   It's like health to him[5:20:27]   from a game[5:20:29]   And on these YouTubers' podcasts[5:20:31]   George calls himself a comedian[5:20:33]   but he's not really in the same scene[5:20:35]   On these YouTubers' podcasts, these guys can say[5:20:37]   just a normal sentence[5:20:39]   and then whoever it's like, Tana, Logan Paul[5:20:41]   anybody who's just a[5:20:43]   regular YouTuber, they die[5:20:45]   They die laughing[5:20:47]   and these comedians, you see them[5:20:49]   They're almost surprised by it and then they light up[5:20:51]   It's like, no[5:20:53]   Be surprised and go, okay, okay, okay[5:20:55]   But now you see them gobble it up[5:20:57]   and then they'll keep talking[5:20:59]   You start laughing[5:21:01]   loud and they'll start waking up[5:21:03]   They'll start talking[5:21:05]   It's really something else[5:21:07]   and you can see the most perverse comedians[5:21:09]   the darkest ones[5:21:11]   are the ones who share that[5:21:13]   attitude and they'll want you to believe[5:21:15]   that that's a good[5:21:17]   attitude to have[5:21:19]   They'll talk about this as casually[5:21:21]   as we talk about[5:21:23]   Oh yeah, I ran into my friend yesterday[5:21:25]   It was nice to see her[5:21:27]   They talk about it casually[5:21:29]   Maybe I'm not making myself clear[5:21:31]   Swallow when people's laughs like that[5:21:35]   power, like Freddy Krueger[5:21:37]   is wrong and evil[5:21:41]   I mean, maybe some people don't even look at it that way[5:21:43]   I never thought of that[5:21:45]   To me, that's sick. It's as sick as it gets[5:21:47]   Gobbling up my laughs[5:21:51]   Stealing these emotions from me[5:21:53]   These organic[5:21:57]   you know[5:21:59]   one in a million[5:22:01]   It's really crazy[5:22:03]   It's so crazy how easy these people laugh[5:22:05]   to anybody. That is a sexual[5:22:07]   sexual thing[5:22:09]   to give a man a laugh like that[5:22:11]   Be very, very careful about who you[5:22:13]   see laughing at who[5:22:15]   Okay? Really?[5:22:17]   Keep a close eye on those people[5:22:19]   Here, watch[5:22:21]   Alright, well then let me fucking check, dude[5:22:23]   It was so loud[5:22:25]   and I didn't want to take it off because I wanted to seem like a[5:22:27]   Wait, wait, wait[5:22:29]   You check your guest's headphones?[5:22:31]   I don't have guests. It's only me[5:22:33]   I don't have a podcast because I don't want to have to deal with shit like that[5:22:35]   So George, you don't really know nothing about this guy[5:22:37]   You know, you said, you're my favorite[5:22:39]   comic. You're the reason I got into all[5:22:41]   this. No, I gotta say it's one thing for these[5:22:43]   asshole guys to be like[5:22:45]   Oh, Crystalia is amazing and hang[5:22:47]   out because it's like, what do you expect from[5:22:49]   these men? Am I right?[5:22:51]   But Jenko's girlfriend is just gonna[5:22:53]   sit here and I hope she doesn't[5:22:55]   know. So this is my question[5:22:57]   Tashauna Dela Rica[5:22:59]   You listening? It's like, aren't you scared?[5:23:01]   Wait, have you heard[5:23:03]   the allegations?[5:23:05]   If the answer is yes[5:23:07]   So you just don't care about that?[5:23:09]   You think it's fake? Or did George[5:23:11]   tell you they[5:23:13]   were fake? I need to know[5:23:15]   Did she go, wait, doesn't he have like[5:23:17]   all these allegations? And then he's[5:23:19]   like, nah, man, that's bullshit. Just[5:23:21]   a bunch of haters. Trust me on this[5:23:23]   He doesn't let her read[5:23:25]   So that's my[5:23:27]   question is how does a girl[5:23:29]   I mean, a lot of this[5:23:31]   Crystalia stuff is very recent. How does a girl[5:23:33]   like this appears to be[5:23:35]   very nice, very[5:23:37]   sensitive towards other people's[5:23:39]   feelings, right?[5:23:41]   She seems like a sweet girl[5:23:43]   to me. Why does she[5:23:45]   think it's so awesome to[5:23:47]   meet a guy who's been[5:23:49]   accused of sexual[5:23:51]   misconduct with 10 women? I mean, she[5:23:53]   looks like one of his victims[5:23:55]   But that's what I mean. I need to hear from[5:23:57]   Shauna. Why is[5:23:59]   it so exciting for you?[5:24:01]   And why couldn't you be like, that's[5:24:03]   cool. We could interview somebody[5:24:05]   who doesn't have those allegations[5:24:07]   You know,[5:24:09]   it's just that the[5:24:11]   excitement and[5:24:13]   you know, the alligator, you're fresh off just[5:24:15]   watching that. You just Googled Chris because[5:24:17]   he's coming on the show and if you YouTube[5:24:19]   Google Chris, all[5:24:21]   you're getting is allegation videos[5:24:23]   So I don't know what's so[5:24:25]   fucking, what's to be happy[5:24:29]   about here? What's so exciting?[5:24:31]   I don't want to have to deal[5:24:33]   with people not showing up, people like saying[5:24:35]   like, Oh, we got to move the time[5:24:37]   Even this one, this is your podcast[5:24:39]   We were supposed to do it Friday[5:24:41]   And he called me. He's like, dude, can we do it Wednesday?[5:24:43]   I was sick. You weren't even[5:24:45]   sick. You're sick.[5:24:47]   We didn't want to get you sick. I know that was sweet[5:24:49]   But I'm like, all right, that's fine. Like I don't even[5:24:51]   want to deal with that. I want to do my own[5:24:53]   That's why I have my podcast and I have[5:24:55]   my podcast with my brother. So you lied to me and you said it[5:24:57]   was okay. What was okay? Because it's not[5:24:59]   okay. It was okay. I don't give a shit[5:25:01]   But just the whole reason why I don't have guests[5:25:03]   Hey man, tell yourself that[5:25:05]   I don't care. So a lot[5:25:07]   of flirting, a lot of riffing and Chris is[5:25:09]   pretty happy right now[5:25:11]   Those laughs came in. He was a little nervous[5:25:13]   about coming. He's in his head[5:25:15]   Those laughs came in. He goes, Oh, okay[5:25:17]   I got this[5:25:19]   Keep in mind Chris is in a pretty good mood[5:25:21]   for the beginning of this podcast here[5:25:23]   You can go to three thirty for[5:25:25]   a little one. Three thirty. We got a little one[5:25:27]   at three thirty. Here we go[5:25:29]   Uh[5:25:31]   Are you?[5:25:33]   No[5:25:35]   Not being married. I would die.[5:25:37]   My mom would kill me. She's a Syrian[5:25:39]   No, but actually one of your jokes[5:25:41]   was it's like you say you talk about[5:25:43]   how he says Bardar[5:25:45]   Oh, I slipped that[5:25:47]   I slipped that in a podcast[5:25:49]   Uh oh[5:25:51]   What's happening here? Okay, we got another[5:25:53]   little thief. Keebler Elf[5:25:55]   Stealing jokes[5:25:57]   from trees. Little[5:25:59]   George Janko. Listen to this one[5:26:01]   I hate to say this[5:26:03]   I'm just trying to point out what they're talking[5:26:05]   about. I hate to say this. I'm gonna go like this[5:26:07]   Bardar[5:26:09]   Now I don't know[5:26:11]   what that is. I actually don't either[5:26:13]   We don't know what it is, but[5:26:15]   there's some bit where Chris[5:26:17]   is running around screaming[5:26:19]   screaming[5:26:21]   Bardar[5:26:23]   I'm sure it's in[5:26:25]   his son's voice[5:26:27]   I'm sure it's awfully[5:26:29]   horrible. And I'm embarrassed[5:26:31]   you even have repeated it[5:26:33]   George Janko. They're gonna bring[5:26:35]   this up here. Watch[5:26:37]   Watch how sinister this is[5:26:39]   I'll explain[5:26:41]   Stop being married. I would die[5:26:43]   My mom would kill me. She's a Syrian[5:26:45]   No, but actually one of your jokes[5:26:47]   It's like you talk about[5:26:49]   how he says Bardar[5:26:51]   Oh I slipped that[5:26:53]   I slipped that in a podcast[5:26:55]   Somebody said something that[5:26:57]   You slipped it in a podcast[5:26:59]   What's he getting at here?[5:27:01]   Let's hear him out[5:27:03]   I slipped that in a podcast[5:27:05]   Somebody said something that sounded like[5:27:07]   Bardar. So naturally[5:27:09]   So I went Bardar[5:27:11]   Like that. And I went like this[5:27:13]   Oh fuck. Cause that's part of your bit[5:27:15]   I bit my tongue and I was like[5:27:17]   I'm not gonna feed into it[5:27:19]   And then I reminded myself[5:27:21]   Oh make sure to go in there. Cut that out[5:27:23]   But then I watched it back and I was like[5:27:25]   Oh no one's ever gonna pick this up[5:27:27]   They're not gonna know what the fuck this is[5:27:29]   You[5:27:31]   Shunk[5:27:33]   As low as to steal a Chris[5:27:35]   Delia joke[5:27:37]   You didn't catch yourself[5:27:39]   in real time[5:27:41]   You're telling me the comments[5:27:43]   Are they calling you out on this? Is that what he's saying?[5:27:45]   And Chris is sitting[5:27:47]   there. So basically you're admitting to Chris[5:27:49]   that you used[5:27:51]   one of his lines, one of his bits, one of his[5:27:53]   jokes[5:27:55]   You used it for your financial gain[5:27:57]   Okay[5:27:59]   And you're telling Chris this and now Chris has to[5:28:01]   pretend like oh no that's totally[5:28:03]   Yeah that happens man[5:28:05]   Yeah no that's cool[5:28:07]   This is really making Chris sick[5:28:09]   I mean Chris hates when his essence is[5:28:12]   That's something big about Chris too[5:28:14]   He doesn't like anybody doing his material[5:28:16]   He gets really mad about that[5:28:18]   Did you know that? It's a big thing about him[5:28:20]   Into it[5:28:22]   And then I reminded myself[5:28:24]   Oh make sure to go in there and cut that out[5:28:26]   But then I watched it back and I was like[5:28:28]   Oh no one's ever gonna pick this up[5:28:30]   They're not gonna know what the fuck this is[5:28:32]   Five comments[5:28:34]   Vardar you got that from Chris[5:28:36]   That's just from on the road[5:28:38]   Or something or maybe like in town doing shows[5:28:40]   I just shot my special and I put it on that[5:28:42]   but it's not out yet[5:28:44]   Oh congratulations[5:28:46]   So he steals, can you believe that George Janko[5:28:48]   a little thief and how often does he do that[5:28:50]   And then he pretended[5:28:52]   he didn't know what this Vardar was[5:28:54]   when she stupidly brought it up even though[5:28:56]   she knows this has been a big incident with him[5:28:58]   Vardar what's that[5:29:00]   Oh yes of course Vardar yeah[5:29:02]   I just stole that actually[5:29:04]   Isn't that crazy but I had to stop[5:29:06]   myself I need to really[5:29:08]   I stopped myself it was really hard to[5:29:10]   fight the urge to keep doing your bit[5:29:12]   and take all the laughs[5:29:14]   as my own so I really had[5:29:16]   to use mindfulness[5:29:18]   and self control[5:29:20]   and talk to myself in the moment[5:29:22]   and rein myself in[5:29:24]   What did he say it was insane[5:29:26]   How about just don't steal[5:29:28]   another man's bit[5:29:32]   Disgusting he probably thinks you're allowed[5:29:34]   to do that as long as everybody doesn't[5:29:36]   know and it's just YouTubers[5:29:38]   Okay what's our next thing here[5:29:40]   Go to 1120 for just a mini[5:29:42]   Jankoism[5:29:44]   Sorry I'm a fan of Jankoism[5:29:46]   See what he does here[5:29:48]   It's way harder to have actual[5:29:50]   good material and make it work in every room[5:29:52]   Way harder[5:29:54]   I didn't even I know that sounds stupid[5:29:56]   because I just entered the[5:29:58]   field of stand up but I didn't[5:30:00]   know that people talk about the same[5:30:02]   jokes for like a year or so[5:30:04]   I didn't know this[5:30:06]   I had no idea I thought it was like[5:30:08]   okay I'm gonna try this joke and if it works I'll just keep it[5:30:10]   Bro I didn't know that you have to[5:30:12]   work on a material until it's[5:30:14]   like perfect so I'm like I thought[5:30:16]   that some of the communities were fucking lazy[5:30:18]   when I was coming around I was like damn this guy's been saying the[5:30:20]   same fucking joke for so long[5:30:22]   Turns in the crowd hurt[5:30:24]   Hurry up Joe[5:30:26]   You hear that that's what we think[5:30:28]   No I didn't know that and then[5:30:30]   I got into it and then I realized that[5:30:32]   there's an art to[5:30:34]   laughing at the joke that you already know what the fuck[5:30:36]   like you know what I mean? Anyways I just like that[5:30:38]   Yeah I love that[5:30:40]   He's right here you know he should be[5:30:42]   disgusted by that[5:30:44]   This whole BS non[5:30:46]   about how comedians are working[5:30:48]   on their material so once they come[5:30:50]   up with a joke they have to work[5:30:52]   on it now Jules for one year[5:30:54]   of course[5:30:56]   Within that one year I'm gonna chore it[5:30:58]   till the final day when I shoot my special[5:31:00]   and then release it[5:31:02]   So you know what I'm[5:31:04]   saying is how much are they really working[5:31:06]   on these bits[5:31:08]   or is it mostly you just want to do[5:31:10]   the same bit for one year[5:31:12]   so that you don't[5:31:14]   have to think of a different one every day[5:31:16]   It's mostly that I think[5:31:18]   Well I would love to see[5:31:20]   you know what they should do all these bits[5:31:22]   you claim you worked on for a year let's see the start[5:31:24]   of those bits come out with a thing[5:31:26]   where you show the start show the end it should be a[5:31:28]   tremendous growth[5:31:30]   to the end of these bits but I would[5:31:32]   I would bet if you[5:31:34]   heard these jokes they're pretty much[5:31:36]   the same as they were when they were[5:31:38]   first said 12 months[5:31:40]   ago okay I think comics[5:31:42]   got a step using that one I want[5:31:44]   all new material every show[5:31:46]   For some reason it fascinates me to hear[5:31:48]   Jenko tell me about comics[5:31:50]   but anyways here's where it starts to get[5:31:52]   good 1415[5:31:54]   Jenko tells Chris about the greatest[5:31:56]   night of his life[5:31:58]   wow it's cut me off here[5:32:01]   at a most played[5:32:03]   it's jumping to 1438[5:32:05]   look at this it's not giving me any times here[5:32:07]   let's try[5:32:09]   this look it's just 1438[5:32:11]   just click there[5:32:13]   just hold on a sec[5:32:15]   there we go[5:32:17]   no it's just giving me[5:32:19]   1438 pull up for[5:32:21]   precise seeking[5:32:23]   this is interesting just take a chance[5:32:25]   pull up in that hill buddy[5:32:27]   go in the hill[5:32:29]   just click in the hill and see what time shows up there[5:32:31]   that's crazy[5:32:33]   tell you the greatest night of my life[5:32:35]   it's pretty close[5:32:37]   here's what I do people laugh and then you get[5:32:39]   paid for that it's like amazing I'm so lucky[5:32:41]   so I gotta tell you the[5:32:43]   greatest night of my life[5:32:45]   well it's up there bro it's like really up there I've told[5:32:47]   it so many times and it's kind of funny I'm gonna tell you right now[5:32:49]   this is a little embarrassing though[5:32:51]   hey guys this video is actually sponsored by me[5:32:53]   today I wanted to connect one[5:32:55]   wait this is crazy too he doesn't[5:32:57]   add for you to subscribe to his[5:32:59]   Instagram so you can FaceTime[5:33:01]   him for $9.99[5:33:03]   really?[5:33:05]   oh I gotta hear this so this interrupted the part we were here[5:33:07]   to play very rudely with this[5:33:09]   ad but let's hear this ad[5:33:11]   uh hey guys this video[5:33:13]   is actually sponsored by me today I wanted to[5:33:15]   connect one on one with you guys[5:33:17]   really? you hear this guys?[5:33:19]   he wants to connect one on one[5:33:21]   on me[5:33:23]   on me[5:33:27]   get it[5:33:29]   vlogs or podcasts that is[5:33:31]   exclusive and you really want that[5:33:33]   one on one experience with me now on[5:33:35]   Instagram you could subscribe and we've been having[5:33:37]   amazing conversations $9.99 a month[5:33:39]   so if that's something that you guys are interested in hop on over[5:33:41]   to my Instagram the link is in the description[5:33:43]   and uh let's have some really cool[5:33:45]   conversations wait you're telling[5:33:47]   does everybody get a convo?[5:33:49]   that's pretty good[5:33:51]   guys if you could get a nice convo with[5:33:53]   Janko on my behalf[5:33:55]   I feel like you could get[5:33:57]   out of him some stories[5:33:59]   about Big Mike and Logan if you kind of[5:34:01]   really got him after ball[5:34:03]   oh he's so stupid you could trick him into saying anything[5:34:05]   like just think of like a million[5:34:07]   stories about what you think could've[5:34:09]   went down and be like dude I'm just[5:34:11]   struggling because my bros I have[5:34:13]   two friends that I work with[5:34:15]   and they've been disrespecting me[5:34:17]   and not understanding[5:34:19]   trick him easily[5:34:21]   it's that exact same thing just happened to me[5:34:23]   it would be so easy[5:34:25]   he's wearing all black[5:34:27]   black socks, black pants, black shirt[5:34:29]   black beard, black eyebrows, black[5:34:31]   hair, black headphones[5:34:33]   it's like a little ninja[5:34:35]   alright here it is[5:34:37]   first time I ever got to perform in front of my girlfriend[5:34:39]   was in front of you as well[5:34:41]   that was that night really?[5:34:43]   that was the first time you performed in front of you?[5:34:45]   yeah and remember you took some pictures[5:34:47]   and you captivated our moment[5:34:49]   for us it was so special[5:34:51]   I remember thinking I gotta take this picture because it's the first time[5:34:53]   that's right I remember that[5:34:55]   which was so sweet[5:34:57]   remember when Shane Gillis was on Kill Tony[5:34:59]   and there was a comic on stage[5:35:01]   doing his one minute[5:35:03]   and[5:35:05]   the entire time the comic was up there[5:35:07]   Shane just interviewed him as if he was a normal comic[5:35:13]   but then it turns out halfway through the set[5:35:15]   the guy reveals that he's Shane's roommate[5:35:17]   remember that?[5:35:19]   of course[5:35:21]   so there's like this open mic loser on Kill Tony[5:35:23]   bombing his head off[5:35:25]   they're interviewing him they're doing all this stuff[5:35:27]   and then halfway through he goes[5:35:29]   Shane what the fuck man you're my roommate[5:35:31]   you know what's going on[5:35:33]   and he's like oh oh oh[5:35:35]   you like tried to hide[5:35:37]   first of all you had a roommate with a guy[5:35:39]   you shouldn't be on Kill Tony[5:35:41]   you shouldn't be on any sort of podcast if you're rooming with a guy[5:35:43]   so similar to that we're gonna see something here[5:35:47]   we're gonna see something similar with Chris here[5:35:49]   comedian embarrassment[5:35:51]   yeah, comedian embarrassment is very real[5:35:53]   and sometimes comedians do things[5:35:55]   sometimes they go low[5:35:57]   and you're about to see us discover something[5:35:59]   along with[5:36:01]   cause stupid George is so stupid[5:36:03]   so we've seen Chris flash hotel employees in the hallways[5:36:07]   we've seen him create a cult[5:36:09]   where he has girls following his wishes[5:36:11]   every day driving where he needs them to go[5:36:13]   we've seen him forcing them to get tattoos[5:36:15]   we've seen him forcing them to get on their knees[5:36:17]   this is all alleged of course[5:36:19]   allegedly[5:36:21]   but this might be the most shocking thing[5:36:23]   we've heard yet[5:36:25]   yes this is a side of Chris[5:36:27]   this is one of the wildest things[5:36:29]   I think he's done[5:36:31]   as far as late night activities[5:36:33]   goes you're not gonna believe[5:36:35]   the activities Chris is up to[5:36:37]   you know remember this guy was a bad guy[5:36:39]   the activities Chris is up to[5:36:41]   remember this guy was a big action star[5:36:43]   he was rolling with the celebs[5:36:45]   he wanted to be hanging out with[5:36:47]   at the very least Chappelle[5:36:49]   you know on a Friday night[5:36:51]   wait till you hear who he's hanging out with[5:36:53]   now[5:36:55]   and what kind of activities he's up to[5:36:57]   these days[5:36:59]   be there, it was the first time[5:37:01]   or second time performing at the Laugh Factory[5:37:03]   Enrique wanted you to watch me[5:37:05]   so he hit you up, and this motherfucker[5:37:07]   I'm like why the fuck would you tell me that[5:37:09]   don't tell me that, I'm already nervous about it[5:37:11]   you wanted Chris D'Elia to watch you[5:37:13]   stand up, what did you think he was gonna do?[5:37:15]   you heard a story that[5:37:17]   comics are gonna help you, you think Chris D'Elia[5:37:19]   is gonna come help you?[5:37:23]   he's gonna mentor you?[5:37:27]   you're completely lost, George[5:37:29]   you have no idea what's[5:37:31]   going on, you told another comic[5:37:33]   at the club, hey can you go ask[5:37:35]   Chris if he can watch my set, I'm new[5:37:37]   are you a little girl?[5:37:40]   Chris, would you mind watching my set[5:37:44]   I'm new[5:37:46]   that's what he thinks[5:37:48]   he thinks it's that inviting[5:37:50]   I don't know if I time coded this, but[5:37:52]   at one point he goes, Chris, you are the reason[5:37:54]   that I started comedy, you're the reason[5:37:56]   you're doing all of this, but he said that[5:37:58]   to Sebastian, McCoy,[5:38:00]   Bobby Lee, like a million[5:38:02]   people[5:38:04]   wait till you hear the story, cause it's kinda hard[5:38:06]   to figure out, they don't outright tell us[5:38:08]   what happened here, but we'll discover[5:38:10]   it through their conversation[5:38:12]   in front of Val, and so[5:38:14]   afterwards, you know, my dream came true[5:38:16]   everybody kinda liked what I was doing, we had a moment together[5:38:18]   I'll remember, and then I[5:38:20]   remember, I was like, I wonder if I could[5:38:22]   get these people back to my house, like hang out[5:38:24]   and I go[5:38:26]   oh right[5:38:28]   oh right, look at this[5:38:30]   he goes, I do my stand up, you come[5:38:32]   and watch, I get off stage[5:38:34]   we have a moment[5:38:36]   I find out[5:38:38]   that everyone does love my stuff[5:38:40]   and then we had a moment[5:38:42]   and Chris is going, yeah[5:38:44]   yeah, right, right, right, so you're telling[5:38:46]   me, here's the picture so far[5:38:48]   let me paint it[5:38:50]   George is at the Laugh Factory, Chris[5:38:52]   is at the Laugh Factory[5:38:54]   George has some other[5:38:56]   comic tell Chris to come watch him[5:38:58]   George gets off stage[5:39:00]   asks Chris what he thought[5:39:02]   Chris said, you were great[5:39:04]   yeah, you were great[5:39:06]   yeah, you were great[5:39:08]   he considers that a heart to heart[5:39:10]   then, he does this[5:39:12]   everybody kinda liked what I was doing[5:39:14]   we had a moment together, I'll remember[5:39:16]   and then I[5:39:18]   remember, I was like, I wonder if I could get these people[5:39:20]   like back to my house, like hang out[5:39:22]   and I go, yo guys, I'm hanging on my place[5:39:24]   if you guys, I'm just having like a little kickback[5:39:26]   no fucking kickback was planned by the way[5:39:28]   I really just threw it out there, hoping that like[5:39:30]   you guys were like, nah, be me next time and then we can exchange numbers[5:39:32]   and then everybody was like[5:39:34]   sounds great, where's your address?[5:39:36]   and I was like, no fucking way this is happening[5:39:38]   what George is saying[5:39:40]   is that, he's like[5:39:42]   I gotta take this shot[5:39:44]   all the comics are at the Laugh Factory[5:39:46]   he just got off stage[5:39:48]   Chris D'Elia is there[5:39:50]   uh[5:39:52]   I forget, a couple other big name[5:39:54]   comics, Jo Koy[5:39:56]   and Janko goes, I gotta[5:39:58]   take this opportunity[5:40:00]   and then lies about[5:40:02]   there being a party[5:40:04]   back at his house[5:40:06]   that they could all go to[5:40:08]   yo, I got this thing back at my place tonight[5:40:10]   if you guys all want to come[5:40:12]   and they're like, oh, okay[5:40:14]   I guess there's a party happening[5:40:16]   there was no party[5:40:18]   George made up the party[5:40:20]   in real time[5:40:22]   in hopes to just get these guys back[5:40:24]   to his apartment[5:40:26]   so that he could simply[5:40:28]   hang out with them[5:40:30]   he's telling the story now[5:40:32]   listen to this shit[5:40:34]   remember, I was like, I wonder if I could get these people[5:40:36]   back to my house, like hang out[5:40:38]   and I go, yo guys, I'm hanging out at my place[5:40:40]   if you guys, I'm just having a little kick back[5:40:42]   no fucking kick back was planned by the way[5:40:44]   I really just threw it out there, hoping that you guys[5:40:46]   were like, nah, meet me next time and then we could exchange numbers[5:40:48]   and then everybody was like[5:40:50]   sounds great, where's your address? and I was like, no fucking way[5:40:52]   this is happening, so I called this guy[5:40:54]   just go roll up all the joints, get drinks[5:40:56]   go to the store, grab snacks[5:40:58]   he's telling this to Chris for the first time[5:41:00]   so Chris just thought there was[5:41:02]   some kind of party going on[5:41:04]   nothing else going on that night[5:41:06]   so maybe we'll swing on over[5:41:08]   I'm not sure[5:41:10]   maybe there was a girl that he wanted[5:41:12]   yeah[5:41:14]   so George has no party plans[5:41:16]   so he calls his sister and he's telling her[5:41:18]   make this place look like a party[5:41:20]   I mean, get joints out[5:41:22]   get cops, go run out[5:41:24]   get whatever you need, get ice[5:41:26]   George Janko's a nerd, he's trying to[5:41:28]   come up in the comedy community[5:41:30]   he has an excuse[5:41:32]   but Chris[5:41:34]   Chris D'Elia though[5:41:36]   does Chris D'Elia have an excuse[5:41:38]   of going over to a[5:41:40]   kids house?[5:41:44]   so this is what Chris D'Elia[5:41:46]   is doing now?[5:41:48]   you're going over to George Janko's[5:41:50]   starter apartment[5:41:52]   and hanging[5:41:54]   out there all night, listen to this story[5:41:56]   change numbers[5:41:58]   and then everybody was like, sounds great, where's your address?[5:42:00]   and I was like, no fucking way, this is happening[5:42:02]   so I called Jessica, I go, Jessica, roll up all the joints[5:42:04]   get drinks, go to the store[5:42:06]   grab snacks, and she's like, what the fuck's[5:42:08]   happening? I was like, I don't know, just[5:42:10]   fucking go! yeah, we were home like, we're like, okay, let's[5:42:12]   get things ready, let's grab, put things out, like[5:42:14]   you know? I'm on my way home, I'm at a red light[5:42:16]   next to the Hollywood Bowl, I'm calling my mom[5:42:18]   and dad, I'm like, you won't fucking believe this[5:42:20]   I go, Chris is coming, Enrique's coming[5:42:22]   and then I was like, oh my god, fuck[5:42:24]   Enrique's calling me right now, let me call you back[5:42:26]   and then I like, settled myself, and I go, boop boop[5:42:28]   what up, bro? and he goes, yo, look to[5:42:30]   your left, and I was like, no fucking way[5:42:32]   and I turned and all of them are out the window[5:42:34]   waving at me, I was like, oh my god[5:42:36]   dude, that was so embarrassing[5:42:38]   but we get here, and I'm sitting[5:42:40]   right here, and[5:42:42]   you get up, like, we're all smoking[5:42:44]   we're having a good time, and this is a moment[5:42:46]   that I'll like, look back, do you have any[5:42:48]   idea what it does to you? Chris is sitting there[5:42:50]   just like Shane Gillis[5:42:52]   go back and pause[5:42:54]   on Chris's face[5:42:56]   Chris can't believe[5:42:58]   we get here, and I'm sitting right here[5:43:00]   and you get up[5:43:02]   like, we're all smoking, we're having a good time[5:43:04]   and this is a moment that I'll like[5:43:06]   look back[5:43:08]   Chris cannot believe[5:43:10]   George is telling everybody that[5:43:12]   he hung out[5:43:14]   and partied with George Janko[5:43:16]   all night[5:43:18]   George's little apartment[5:43:20]   that's what you're doing now?[5:43:22]   this story gets[5:43:24]   much worse, Chris was like[5:43:26]   this was a big part of Chris's night[5:43:28]   and I thought Chris didn't do drugs[5:43:30]   yeah, you were all sitting around smoking[5:43:32]   it's like, mhm[5:43:34]   mhm, mhm[5:43:36]   he's so embarrassed that his[5:43:38]   peers are hearing this[5:43:40]   we're all smoking, we're having a good time[5:43:42]   and this is a moment that I'll like look back[5:43:44]   do you have any idea what it does to somebody's[5:43:46]   brain? watching somebody[5:43:48]   on TV all the time and absorbing[5:43:50]   and learning and like[5:43:52]   before I even did anything on social media[5:43:54]   this is making it way worse[5:43:56]   you come and you meet me[5:43:58]   so now he's saying, do you know what it's like[5:44:00]   that I grew up watching you on TV[5:44:02]   and now you're in my house?[5:44:04]   and Chris is mine[5:44:06]   that's such a low[5:44:08]   so now Chris is basically just hanging out[5:44:10]   with some random kid fan[5:44:12]   first of all, why aren't you hanging out with[5:44:14]   Hollywood's hugest celebs and movie stars[5:44:16]   second of all, if they aren't available[5:44:18]   why aren't you with your wife and kid that you love[5:44:20]   so much?[5:44:22]   I mean really, at his age, at his disgrace[5:44:24]   he'll go as low as Janko[5:44:26]   for a night out[5:44:28]   this is what you do when you're like 25[5:44:30]   and you've got nothing[5:44:32]   cooking, and you just[5:44:34]   yeah, we all go back to some stupid comedians[5:44:36]   house who was here at the club[5:44:38]   you don't do this as a Chris D'Elia[5:44:40]   an action star[5:44:42]   but it gets worse[5:44:44]   talk to me, and then now[5:44:46]   you're standing right here in my house[5:44:48]   we're all chilling and you're giving us this material[5:44:50]   that you're working on, I'm like how the[5:44:52]   fuck did I get here[5:44:54]   and I just want to let you know that that sits in my heart[5:44:56]   like all the time[5:44:58]   I think about you all the time[5:45:00]   cause that's a night that really[5:45:02]   gives Chris a lot of guilt in his[5:45:04]   stomach[5:45:06]   as far as how low he is[5:45:08]   sank[5:45:10]   oh that's so sweet[5:45:12]   so now George has completely[5:45:14]   turned himself into a fan[5:45:16]   to Chris[5:45:18]   a countless fan that he's[5:45:20]   sick of talking to, he sees a little guy at the meetup[5:45:22]   you know[5:45:24]   that's what George has become to Chris[5:45:26]   and another thing, I don't know if you guys ever[5:45:28]   listen to Chris's own podcast[5:45:30]   but he has a completely[5:45:32]   different personality, like he acts the way[5:45:34]   he acts in his stand up on his own[5:45:36]   podcast[5:45:38]   and then he comes on these other guys' podcasts[5:45:40]   and he's like, yeah man[5:45:42]   this is just amazing bro[5:45:44]   I know[5:45:46]   like who are you?[5:45:48]   seriously[5:45:50]   that's why you don't do interviews I guess[5:45:52]   yeah, I mean it's just remarkable[5:45:54]   I don't know what kind of Chris[5:45:56]   Delia this is[5:45:58]   nice teeth, nothing beats those teeth[5:46:00]   look at that guy[5:46:02]   imagine[5:46:04]   he actually looks kind of cute, that zoomed in[5:46:06]   really really small dogs[5:46:08]   faces[5:46:10]   yeah I wish I was like 100 yards away from him at the beach[5:46:12]   looking through binoculars and him close[5:46:14]   up while he does his beach stuff[5:46:16]   that's cute, his eyes[5:46:18]   he looks nice[5:46:20]   okay let's hear some more about this huge night[5:46:22]   huh Chris?[5:46:24]   no that's really sweet[5:46:26]   man, yeah that's funny[5:46:28]   man because I remember that[5:46:30]   night and I actually remember thinking like[5:46:32]   wow this is cool meeting[5:46:34]   new people and like[5:46:36]   really? you know I felt comfortable enough[5:46:38]   because I mean like dude it's like[5:46:40]   I don't know you're really good[5:46:42]   at being in a room like just you[5:46:44]   you're very like[5:46:46]   oh you fill the room when you walk into the room[5:46:48]   you're very you know[5:46:50]   and I[5:46:52]   know that mode because I know[5:46:54]   how to do stand up so like obviously I know how to do[5:46:56]   that but like often I'm like[5:46:58]   I feel really insecure I don't want to do[5:47:00]   that or you know maybe I[5:47:02]   don't know what to expect of me to be funny[5:47:04]   but like I don't want to really[5:47:06]   have that mode on[5:47:08]   basically what he's saying is everybody knows me[5:47:10]   as this rapist[5:47:12]   so it's really tough to go anywhere[5:47:14]   with a group of people in someone's apartment[5:47:16]   that I don't know[5:47:18]   and I couldn't believe how sweet you guys[5:47:20]   were because the whole time I was there[5:47:22]   it was as if[5:47:24]   you had never heard that I[5:47:26]   have done any sexual misconduct[5:47:28]   it was amazing[5:47:30]   I finally felt[5:47:32]   it's like do you know how pathetic[5:47:34]   that is that you finally[5:47:36]   felt comfortable because a bunch of dumb ass[5:47:38]   kids let you in their house[5:47:40]   you think you're[5:47:42]   free now?[5:47:44]   and you think it's not?[5:47:46]   this is like when he joined Threads[5:47:48]   thinking[5:47:50]   oh I'm back baby[5:47:52]   listen to this crap[5:47:54]   I feel really insecure I don't want to do[5:47:56]   that or you know maybe I[5:47:58]   don't know what people expect of me to be funny[5:48:00]   but like I don't want to[5:48:02]   really have that mode on right[5:48:04]   now but then I don't want people to think I'm like in a bad[5:48:06]   mood right because like if I'm just[5:48:08]   out somewhere and people are like[5:48:10]   some people are like he's a dick[5:48:12]   and it's just because I'm not like hey hey[5:48:14]   you know what I mean and it's like I'm a regular[5:48:16]   person but like so[5:48:18]   it's because you sit there like this[5:48:20]   freaking the fuck out[5:48:22]   because you got so much guilt[5:48:24]   that's why everyone's going what's wrong with him[5:48:26]   it's because you act like a[5:48:28]   complete creep[5:48:30]   yes you should not be in the[5:48:32]   mix with anybody in their apartments[5:48:34]   that's over you stay[5:48:36]   at home stay in the shadows[5:48:38]   that's where we need you[5:48:40]   okay you're too much of what's called a creep[5:48:42]   get it?[5:48:44]   I was able to feel comfortable enough in front of you[5:48:46]   guys and all your friends and you know[5:48:48]   everyone that was here that it[5:48:50]   was actually like I left that night thinking[5:48:52]   like man that was really a special night[5:48:54]   so yeah bro we have a picture of[5:48:56]   all of us wearing the same jacket[5:48:58]   that whole day was[5:49:00]   weird you guys like all fell[5:49:02]   in love and Chris you like let loose and[5:49:04]   became like best friend slumber party[5:49:06]   all night with these guys that you[5:49:08]   didn't know any of them[5:49:10]   you started all wearing matching jackets[5:49:12]   you were so this is what happened[5:49:14]   Chris went to the party all nervous[5:49:16]   but he was in that mode[5:49:18]   he goes to this party with a bunch of these idiots[5:49:20]   they all start laughing at every[5:49:22]   word out of his mouth[5:49:24]   Chris lights up now he's[5:49:26]   comfortable[5:49:28]   because they're all just[5:49:30]   laughing at him that's where he's most comfortable[5:49:32]   on stage that's why he's so comfortable on stage[5:49:34]   they're all just dying laughing[5:49:36]   allowing all the misconduct[5:49:38]   all the guilt[5:49:40]   washing it right away with their laughs[5:49:42]   and so he loved that he ate[5:49:44]   that up and now he's yearning for more[5:49:46]   he's hanging out with kids now[5:49:48]   I don't know if this is the place for him[5:49:50]   does his wife know he's hanging[5:49:52]   out with a bunch of little kids[5:49:54]   I remember what you were saying Jessica[5:49:56]   was passing out on a tray[5:49:58]   pre-rolls that she made[5:50:00]   but when I yelled I was like dude get fucking[5:50:02]   people out of smoke there was one girl I don't[5:50:04]   know what her name was it was the black girl[5:50:06]   comedian what's her name she was really pretty[5:50:08]   oh my god[5:50:10]   I forgot her name I only met her once[5:50:12]   but I never fucking ever[5:50:14]   talked to that girl the only reason she was here[5:50:16]   is she literally said no and I invited her[5:50:18]   I was like alright well if you change your mind there's going to be a lot of weed there[5:50:20]   I said that as a joke[5:50:22]   and she literally goes anyways[5:50:24]   yeah yeah yeah[5:50:26]   he does that or he wants you to stop talking[5:50:28]   look at this fucking snake[5:50:30]   he loves that[5:50:34]   fucking phone and what are you looking at now on the phone[5:50:36]   he's texting one of his[5:50:39]   girls to meet him outside[5:50:41]   of this house that's a great that's a stock[5:50:43]   Getty stock image[5:50:45]   no this[5:50:47]   is like a how to stock image[5:50:49]   I'm not saying too lazy to try[5:50:51]   does this but it's coming to mind[5:50:53]   like if you had to make an edited video[5:50:55]   where it was like one of Chris's victims[5:50:57]   yeah I would slowly zoom in[5:50:59]   and then a picture of him[5:51:01]   on the other end responding[5:51:03]   you could use this yes exactly that would[5:51:05]   be perfect for something like that[5:51:07]   look at this guy he's so crooked[5:51:09]   that's a[5:51:11]   crooked guy huh alright we got[5:51:13]   some more great Chris stuff[5:51:15]   3005 but that's a big[5:51:17]   one I didn't know he was hanging out with kids[5:51:19]   that surprised me[5:51:21]   what is the time code[5:51:23]   at 3005 3005[5:51:25]   coming up so that's where[5:51:27]   his life's at now he's hanging out with little[5:51:29]   Chris in the house that his girl lives in[5:51:31]   is just[5:51:33]   that's almost abuse that's really sick[5:51:35]   and to just let all these other random girls[5:51:37]   there Chris is basically on the loose[5:51:39]   nobody's watching him[5:51:41]   he shouldn't be out without[5:51:43]   a chaperone from the state[5:51:45]   you know somebody from the local[5:51:47]   police should be watching[5:51:49]   him when he goes out[5:51:51]   I mean he's being investigated by the FBI[5:51:53]   he's being investigated by the FBI[5:51:55]   right now I like how that's not enough anymore[5:51:57]   shouldn't that be enough to go I don't think[5:51:59]   we need these guys who get investigated by the FBI[5:52:01]   to come into the house[5:52:03]   that's what I would do I wouldn't want that[5:52:05]   there's enough other guys out there[5:52:07]   where you just don't need the FBI[5:52:09]   investigated ones to be the guys that you hang[5:52:11]   out with so[5:52:13]   a lot of people that do stand up they try to[5:52:15]   do it so that he get into like TVs[5:52:17]   and movies and you've had such a successful[5:52:19]   like lane when it comes to that did you[5:52:21]   want to do that or was that something that you were[5:52:23]   like oh this is the doors are opening let me just[5:52:25]   take it yeah well now it's backwards[5:52:27]   yeah now it's backwards huh[5:52:29]   remember when you wanted to be a[5:52:31]   action star[5:52:33]   that's the best part about it it's not he[5:52:35]   wanted to be an actor he's[5:52:37]   on record saying I want to be[5:52:39]   an action star[5:52:41]   that's not[5:52:43]   a real title by the way[5:52:45]   that's like an opinion concept[5:52:47]   that we call Jean-Claude[5:52:49]   Van Damme he's an[5:52:51]   actor though he didn't sign up action star[5:52:53]   yes please[5:52:55]   you know maybe they've gotten that specific now[5:52:57]   they shouldn't[5:52:59]   but yeah Christian wanted to just be an actor he wanted[5:53:01]   to be an action star and he was[5:53:03]   digitally removed[5:53:05]   from the Todd[5:53:07]   Snyder film[5:53:09]   and replaced with a breastless[5:53:11]   lesbian[5:53:13]   named Tig Notaro I mean[5:53:15]   you can never get[5:53:17]   over that you know that's the[5:53:19]   biggest L you can take is the[5:53:21]   breastless woman that only happens in like[5:53:23]   the idol that only happens[5:53:25]   in the idol oh my[5:53:27]   Tedros Tedros[5:53:29]   I miss you Tedros there's[5:53:31]   no chance that Tedros character's ever[5:53:33]   coming back did you see that video of Trisha[5:53:35]   doing Tedros ASMR[5:53:37]   probably show some of that no you guys should go see that[5:53:39]   on your own Trisha Paytas does[5:53:41]   wait the one we watched is not as good where she[5:53:43]   does the dressing up as Tedros[5:53:45]   it's like it's okay but then[5:53:47]   I saw another one I don't even think you've seen it[5:53:49]   where she does ASMR as Tedros[5:53:51]   oh wow no I have not[5:53:53]   seen that oh wow[5:53:57]   okay yeah go check that out[5:53:59]   really only watch 35 seconds[5:54:01]   of it you'll go crazy[5:54:03]   so here he is[5:54:05]   and he wanted to be that big[5:54:07]   action star here's dummy George Janko[5:54:09]   asking him about acting[5:54:11]   which Chris doesn't like to talk about[5:54:13]   because George Janko is so idiotic[5:54:15]   you know[5:54:17]   Chris was[5:54:19]   you know they made a decision the Hollywood said no[5:54:21]   and they're not going to let him back[5:54:23]   in now right he's[5:54:25]   like one of the disgraced ones[5:54:27]   they've edited him out they have to stand[5:54:29]   by that decision they can't let him back now[5:54:31]   then they will look stupid for the editing[5:54:33]   so they're just going to stand behind oh[5:54:35]   yes this had to be done[5:54:37]   movies and you've had such a successful[5:54:39]   lane when it comes to that did you[5:54:41]   I think that's a big one too like[5:54:43]   if all of Hollywood is editing you[5:54:45]   out of the movie it was like a big Hollywood[5:54:47]   decision[5:54:49]   isn't that enough to go okay this guy[5:54:51]   is probably[5:54:53]   you know what I mean people don't bring that up enough[5:54:55]   I don't think it's like[5:54:57]   he's got Rolling Stone articles[5:54:59]   investigated by the FBI[5:55:01]   he was edited out of a movie[5:55:03]   millions of dollars to edit him out of this[5:55:05]   movie they decided that was[5:55:07]   worth the cost yes they decided[5:55:09]   can't you trust them[5:55:11]   since when do[5:55:13]   Hollywood productions just throw away money[5:55:15]   so[5:55:17]   believe me this came at a great expense[5:55:19]   to them if they had to do it[5:55:21]   it must really[5:55:23]   have needed to be done they probably know more[5:55:25]   about the gory details there's a lot of guys[5:55:27]   that have done crimes that have not been edited[5:55:29]   out there you go think about all the guys who[5:55:31]   have done crimes they're still in the film[5:55:33]   must have been pretty bad so Chris's might[5:55:35]   have been way worse than we even know[5:55:37]   do you want to do that[5:55:39]   or was that something that you were like oh this is[5:55:41]   the doors are opening let me just take it yeah[5:55:43]   well now it's backwards right like now it's[5:55:45]   like to me the goal is like[5:55:47]   doing stand up yeah[5:55:49]   you know what I'm saying because I don't know[5:55:51]   if this is your point of view but the entertainment[5:55:53]   field isn't where the only place you[5:55:55]   could work stand up[5:55:57]   which I can't wait till that door[5:55:59]   closes and it could[5:56:01]   things could change[5:56:03]   this FBI investigation[5:56:05]   could pop up with some real[5:56:07]   gnarly surprises man[5:56:09]   you know imagine he gets hauled[5:56:11]   off by the FBI[5:56:13]   never to work in a theater in these[5:56:15]   theaters what are you thinking why are you putting[5:56:17]   your insurance at risk[5:56:19]   by having Chris Delia[5:56:21]   and all these patrons you know they're[5:56:23]   at your theater if he does anything to these women[5:56:25]   at your theater it looks like your theater[5:56:27]   was pretty irresponsible I wouldn't take that[5:56:29]   risk I had to watch a tour[5:56:31]   vlog of Chris Delia[5:56:33]   walking all through my neighborhoods[5:56:35]   and towns[5:56:37]   touching all of my Christmas here[5:56:39]   every single day this was here in[5:56:41]   Tucson we do I not deserve to feel[5:56:43]   safe I know[5:56:45]   he's just walking out[5:56:47]   he's going to all our local restaurants[5:56:49]   he's walking in and out of our[5:56:51]   children's homes it's dangerous[5:56:53]   we don't want this guy roaming our streets[5:56:55]   late at night[5:56:57]   yeah it's so fucking[5:56:59]   lame now bro no I'm sorry[5:57:01]   every time I talk shit about the industry she stresses out[5:57:03]   but it's still but she[5:57:05]   loves it but the[5:57:07]   thing about it is it's[5:57:09]   so splintered right like you're[5:57:11]   it's never going to be like in the 80s when[5:57:13]   fucking you know Terminator came out or whatever[5:57:15]   it is like there's never going to really be that movie[5:57:17]   yeah unfortunately but[5:57:19]   but well I mean[5:57:21]   I know I just[5:57:23]   talking about that so yes[5:57:25]   Chris has he's actually[5:57:27]   he made the decision that stand up[5:57:29]   is more important to him wonder[5:57:31]   how he came to that conclusion[5:57:33]   from the being kicked[5:57:35]   out of course all right what's our next[5:57:37]   code[5:57:39]   do you want more about the acting[5:57:41]   stuff or not no that's okay[5:57:43]   there's a funny part where[5:57:45]   they go they should make a Marvel movie[5:57:47]   where a comedian is the main star[5:57:49]   and then Jacob's girlfriend goes there[5:57:51]   there is one Ryan Reynolds ooh[5:57:53]   yeah that was rough too[5:57:55]   I could go to 10150[5:57:57]   10150 here we go we're going[5:57:59]   up 10150 now[5:58:01]   Chris is kind of in a rotten mood[5:58:03]   by this point he's started[5:58:05]   to really realize this kind of sucks he's talking[5:58:07]   to a kid this kid is[5:58:09]   annoying right[5:58:11]   10150 here we come[5:58:13]   there I did my show in Austin[5:58:15]   but it was at this[5:58:17]   theater and[5:58:19]   yeah you know he's just doing[5:58:21]   his thing in Austin I don't[5:58:23]   I don't talk to him too much that's just fucking you fall out of touch[5:58:25]   with people and shit but like[5:58:27]   when they move and but yeah[5:58:29]   I haven't been awesome but yeah he's[5:58:31]   cool oh this is all about Joe Rogan[5:58:33]   this is his cope about not going to[5:58:35]   the oh here we missed[5:58:37]   the question Jules we missed the whole[5:58:39]   question 10150 you said that's[5:58:41]   what I thought it was couldn't be here let's hear this[5:58:43]   and[5:58:45]   I don't know it was[5:58:47]   like uh we just would[5:58:49]   maybe go 10105[5:58:51]   10105 oh my god[5:58:53]   just go back a few seconds[5:58:55]   that's a lot back so it's like[5:58:57]   other comedians sometimes like I guess[5:58:59]   maybe like if I don't know I don't really[5:59:01]   care anymore like even if it's Chappelle[5:59:03]   and like I'm a comedian he knows[5:59:05]   if I don't do well you got to hear George's[5:59:07]   watch like who cares like has Chappelle ever watched you[5:59:09]   yeah yeah we were on a[5:59:11]   101 yeah 10105 is[5:59:13]   10105 there you go[5:59:15]   10105[5:59:17]   let's see what I got here[5:59:19]   here you go enough about bombing[5:59:21]   I don't give a fuck like I have my[5:59:23]   audience and they're cool and like you[5:59:25]   know it doesn't matter something we've[5:59:27]   all been wanting to once you get to that level though[5:59:29]   you get better you know yeah[5:59:31]   it's good you're just like truly comfortable[5:59:33]   yeah great yeah do you[5:59:35]   have any do you have a relationship with Rogan[5:59:37]   oh you[5:59:39]   have a relationship with[5:59:41]   Rogan yeah[5:59:43]   look at this do you have any do you have a[5:59:45]   relationship with Rogan uh-huh yeah[5:59:47]   oh you thought about that for like[5:59:49]   a quick second huh[5:59:51]   that was a weird one[5:59:53]   yeah[5:59:55]   yeah because this is weird we've all wanted[5:59:57]   to know what's Chris's status[5:59:59]   with Joe Rogan of course[6:00:01]   he hasn't been he used to appear on[6:00:03]   on Rogan right Rogan used to[6:00:05]   run in that circle with Chris D'Elia[6:00:07]   Chris used to hang around those boys[6:00:09]   we haven't seen Chris on Rogan[6:00:11]   since the big incident right[6:00:13]   Rogan hasn't brought up Chris at all[6:00:15]   never talks about him[6:00:17]   so I was very surprised to hear that[6:00:19]   yeah do you have any[6:00:21]   do you have a relationship with Rogan[6:00:23]   uh-huh yeah how did that start[6:00:25]   uh he[6:00:27]   was at[6:00:29]   improv[6:00:31]   and I knew him through another friend[6:00:33]   Brian Callen and we just became[6:00:35]   fast friends like he was I thought wait[6:00:37]   a friend Brian Callen you met[6:00:39]   Rogan through Callen. Callen said that[6:00:41]   he barely knew you and you guys were barely[6:00:43]   friends. Interesting. Remember that whole[6:00:45]   thing? I just want[6:00:47]   to say that I barely know Chris[6:00:49]   outside of a few times seeing[6:00:51]   him at the comedy store[6:00:53]   I thought you introduced him to Rogan[6:00:55]   there was that too and I[6:00:57]   knew him through another friend Brian[6:00:59]   Callen and we just became fast friends[6:01:01]   like he was a cool[6:01:03]   fast friend right away like um[6:01:05]   and[6:01:07]   I don't know it was like uh[6:01:09]   we just would laugh with each other and[6:01:11]   I did his podcast a few times and[6:01:13]   since he's moved to Austin and opened up[6:01:15]   his comedy club I haven't been out there[6:01:17]   I don't know we just laughed together[6:01:19]   and do his podcast a few times[6:01:21]   and share laughs[6:01:23]   you laughed together?[6:01:25]   What are you on? Are you on the Vyvanse?[6:01:27]   Vivantica?[6:01:29]   He's on something here[6:01:31]   Since he's moved to[6:01:33]   Austin and opened up his comedy club[6:01:35]   I haven't been out there I did my show[6:01:37]   in Austin. That's why you haven't seen him[6:01:39]   he moved to Austin[6:01:41]   yeah you know[6:01:43]   he's just doing his thing in Austin[6:01:45]   I don't talk to him too much[6:01:47]   you fall out of touch with people and shit[6:01:49]   So you don't have a relationship?[6:01:51]   Yeah and I haven't been to Austin but yeah[6:01:53]   So you fell out of touch[6:01:55]   with him when he moved around[6:01:57]   to Austin around the time of your[6:01:59]   show? No relationship then[6:02:02]   Can we quickly go to[6:02:04]   2.30 and hear about what Jenga[6:02:06]   thinks of Rogan?[6:02:08]   Ok 1.30 let's hear this[6:02:10]   Especially back then[6:02:12]   Long long long time ago[6:02:14]   For anybody who doesn't know what I'm talking about[6:02:16]   Joe was sick of a comedian[6:02:18]   stealing material[6:02:20]   and this is before he was even[6:02:22]   Joe Rogan[6:02:24]   at the level he's at[6:02:26]   for you to take a stage where[6:02:28]   a comedian is way bigger than you[6:02:30]   He was bigger yeah[6:02:32]   He used a household name at the time[6:02:34]   and just[6:02:36]   in front of his own audience too[6:02:38]   just to stand up because nobody wanted to do that[6:02:40]   I heard he got like kicked out from clubs[6:02:42]   he wasn't allowed to perform[6:02:44]   The comedy store wouldn't let him perform there anymore[6:02:46]   after that[6:02:48]   It's crazy that he went from like[6:02:50]   oh that's a no no why the fuck would you ever do that[6:02:52]   to like now anything he basically says[6:02:54]   the whole media is like yeah I guess he's right[6:02:56]   let's listen to him[6:02:58]   Ok listen to this[6:03:00]   In George Janko's mind[6:03:02]   Joe Rogan[6:03:04]   has reached a status where whatever[6:03:06]   Joe says whenever it's in the media[6:03:08]   it's usually[6:03:10]   the media going he's right[6:03:12]   Joe Rogan[6:03:14]   Don't you just love[6:03:16]   Do you hear Chris' confusion[6:03:18]   and stupid Chris is just going to go[6:03:20]   yeah yeah[6:03:22]   Listen to this[6:03:24]   Anything he basically says the whole media is like yeah I guess he's right[6:03:26]   let's listen to him[6:03:28]   It goes to show that he didn't just wake up[6:03:30]   So not quite the story[6:03:32]   Do you understand what he's done there?[6:03:34]   He got that completely opposite[6:03:36]   The media is always attacking him[6:03:38]   Which is what Chris mentioned[6:03:40]   Chris even mentioned that earlier[6:03:42]   Yes[6:03:44]   So now Chris is like oh yeah whenever the media talks about him[6:03:46]   it's oh man he's so right he rules[6:03:48]   Ok[6:03:50]   That's what you think of him in your mind?[6:03:52]   You don't really know[6:03:54]   Alright what's our next code here[6:03:56]   Go to 10835[6:03:58]   10835[6:04:00]   Here we come[6:04:02]   He discusses you think oh my god[6:04:04]   with all these disgusting crimes in my[6:04:06]   past I wish I could just erase[6:04:08]   that I would do anything to have[6:04:10]   not done that[6:04:12]   Yeah right wouldn't you think that he would say something like that[6:04:14]   if I could go back in time I wouldn't[6:04:16]   want any of this to have happened[6:04:18]   Let's see what he says[6:04:20]   Alright let's hear[6:04:22]   She has just made me a better person[6:04:24]   You going through your turbulence[6:04:26]   in life to get to[6:04:28]   be in the arms of your angel[6:04:30]   Yeah[6:04:32]   Do you ever lay in bed[6:04:34]   looking at her and just be like man[6:04:36]   I did have to suffer a lot[6:04:38]   to really enjoy[6:04:40]   and be grateful[6:04:42]   for the position I am in life[6:04:44]   Do you ever feel like you would walk[6:04:46]   through that fire again?[6:04:51]   It was all[6:04:53]   I used to think[6:04:58]   it was the[6:05:02]   worst thing[6:05:06]   that could ever happen[6:05:08]   everything I went through and now[6:05:10]   I can say[6:05:14]   that[6:05:16]   I would[6:05:22]   do[6:05:24]   everything[6:05:26]   I would go through all that shit[6:05:28]   to[6:05:30]   have what I have now[6:05:32]   What the fuck[6:05:34]   You would do it all[6:05:36]   again to have what you have now?[6:05:38]   Do you hear that?[6:05:40]   The victims[6:05:42]   FBI FBI FBI[6:05:44]   He would do it[6:05:46]   His life is so good now[6:05:48]   You hear this ladies?[6:05:50]   His life is so good now[6:05:52]   that he'd do it again[6:05:56]   Oh really dude?[6:05:58]   That's what he said[6:06:00]   He said it[6:06:02]   Jenko's like would you go through[6:06:04]   these same struggles[6:06:06]   if you knew it would lead to the same[6:06:08]   growth that you're at now[6:06:10]   And he says yes[6:06:12]   Do[6:06:14]   everything[6:06:16]   I would go through all that shit[6:06:18]   to[6:06:20]   have what I have now[6:06:22]   I would do[6:06:24]   I would do anything[6:06:26]   for[6:06:28]   Kristen and Calvin and William now[6:06:30]   who's three months old[6:06:32]   I remember[6:06:34]   being a comedian[6:06:36]   And you had to do all that crazy rape stuff[6:06:38]   in order to get Calvin[6:06:40]   and that girl[6:06:42]   It's a web[6:06:44]   Oh my god your son was born[6:06:46]   out of a scandal[6:06:48]   And the only reason you're with him[6:06:50]   that's kind of what you're saying now[6:06:52]   The only reason you're even with this kid[6:06:54]   and didn't say get an abortion bitch[6:06:56]   or else sue[6:06:58]   is because you needed to rework your image[6:07:00]   Right when he got caught with all this stuff[6:07:02]   he had a kid[6:07:04]   the next week[6:07:06]   It was right around the same time[6:07:08]   and then he immediately used his kid[6:07:10]   and this whole family figure[6:07:12]   nonsense[6:07:14]   as a way to show[6:07:16]   that he's grown, he's changed[6:07:18]   he could be forgiven, he's now focused on[6:07:20]   his family[6:07:22]   I think what he's saying is if this didn't happen[6:07:24]   there would be no Calvin[6:07:26]   There would be no Clarissa[6:07:28]   or whatever her name is[6:07:30]   because[6:07:32]   without those rapes I would have never gotten[6:07:34]   you know what I mean?[6:07:36]   I would have never gotten her pregnant during that whole thing[6:07:38]   and that's when I was doing all the fucking[6:07:40]   of all those different women[6:07:42]   He said it[6:07:44]   And then she got pregnant[6:07:46]   and without[6:07:48]   the serious consequences[6:07:50]   I probably wouldn't have kept Calvin[6:07:52]   It's like[6:07:55]   Pusha T and Drake[6:07:57]   You would never have seen Drake's kid if it weren't[6:07:59]   for Pusha T[6:08:01]   He would just send him some food in the mail every once in a while[6:08:03]   in an envelope, some bird food[6:08:05]   and they've got very similar sons[6:08:07]   Drake's son and Chris' son[6:08:09]   should hang out together[6:08:11]   Couple of dweebs, that Calvin[6:08:13]   Ooh, I get sick[6:08:15]   when I see his boy[6:08:17]   Chris D'Elia's son Calvin[6:08:19]   Ooh, is that kid ugly?[6:08:21]   Really, one of the ugliest kids I've ever seen[6:08:23]   Hauntingly[6:08:25]   Nauseating[6:08:27]   To look at[6:08:29]   And same with Drake's kid too[6:08:31]   Well Drake's kid is a little breath of fresh air[6:08:33]   after you're thinking about Calvin[6:08:35]   I'll tell you that[6:08:37]   But they are the same type of kid[6:08:39]   They were unwanted children[6:08:41]   that were scooped up last minute[6:08:43]   and used to show daddy good[6:08:47]   Very despicable[6:08:49]   And your son will hear all about this in my report[6:08:51]   that I'm giving to him when he's 18[6:08:53]   I'd go to 11150 for another little[6:08:55]   Georgism that I liked[6:08:57]   11150, he'd do it all again[6:09:01]   That should be a headline[6:09:03]   Why not?[6:09:05]   In a normal world, that should be a headline[6:09:07]   Every news outlet, Chris D'Elia says[6:09:09]   he would do it all again[6:09:11]   111, what?[6:09:13]   11150, I hope[6:09:17]   He'd do it all again, okay, let's hear some more[6:09:19]   Oh, let's get many of the settings here[6:09:21]   I hate those damn settings[6:09:25]   11150, they say[6:09:27]   I'm gonna try it again[6:09:29]   They hit me with a settings pain[6:09:31]   Please stand up[6:09:33]   And that's fulfilling[6:09:35]   During the stage time, though[6:09:37]   God forbid you make one error[6:09:39]   And the remarks[6:09:41]   start coming[6:09:43]   Hey, oh my god[6:09:45]   So you know when you join the BBG[6:09:47]   and you're like a sweet guy and you're like, oh my god[6:09:49]   I'm so excited to join this group[6:09:51]   for the show that I love[6:09:53]   And then you're like, hey, what's up fam[6:09:55]   I love Red Bar[6:09:57]   Have you seen these types of posts?[6:09:59]   Mike's hair, so excited to hang with you guys[6:10:01]   And then all the comments are like, fuck you, you piece of shit[6:10:03]   Die, you fucking idiot[6:10:05]   If you get into yourself[6:10:07]   Which I like[6:10:09]   I like that that's the way it goes[6:10:11]   Some guy comes in, introduces himself[6:10:13]   He gets destroyed[6:10:15]   But the guy who did the original post[6:10:17]   If you get yourself into that situation[6:10:19]   All you have to do is say[6:10:21]   You make one mistake[6:10:23]   And the remarks start coming[6:10:25]   Yes, we met a guy[6:10:27]   The Italian sunbather[6:10:29]   He's changed our whole outlook[6:10:31]   But[6:10:33]   Anyway, I wanted to[6:10:35]   See if this is okay[6:10:37]   To kind of change what we call comments around here[6:10:39]   Instead of comments[6:10:41]   I'd like to refer to them as remarks[6:10:43]   So much better[6:10:45]   Oh, here come the remarks[6:10:49]   I like that phrase[6:10:51]   That word, remarks[6:10:53]   When I'm clicking the people[6:10:55]   I let people into the BBG[6:10:57]   If they answer all of the questions with their Scars[6:10:59]   Username and stuff[6:11:01]   And every time I click[6:11:03]   Yes to someone, I'm like, oh, you are gonna get[6:11:05]   So fucked[6:11:07]   Wow, listen to that, just based on their picture[6:11:09]   You're like, you're gonna get brutalized[6:11:11]   No, not based on their picture, I just worry for you all[6:11:13]   I'm like, oh, I hope that you don't get into[6:11:15]   Too much trouble in here[6:11:17]   The guys are gonna kill you[6:11:19]   Oh, I see, you see their whole future ahead of them[6:11:21]   Of what could happen[6:11:23]   I should just send them all a personal message[6:11:25]   And be like, just don't introduce yourself[6:11:27]   Don't say nothing[6:11:29]   Okay, so we're at here[6:11:31]   111.50[6:11:33]   Yes[6:11:35]   Okay, just better be rich[6:11:37]   People laugh, I love doing stand up[6:11:39]   And that's fulfilling[6:11:41]   Yes, right, exactly[6:11:43]   So like, that's an hour a day[6:11:45]   But when I'm sitting and I'm with my sons[6:11:47]   And I'm with my wife[6:11:49]   That's fulfilling[6:11:51]   And I could not have realized that[6:11:53]   If I didn't go through everything I went through[6:11:55]   I just couldn't have[6:11:57]   I couldn't have, man, it was too[6:11:59]   You're blessed, bro, you get to handle both of them[6:12:01]   You're blessed, he's blessed[6:12:03]   That's why, when I first met you, bro[6:12:05]   I was just so excited about what you were going through[6:12:07]   And I couldn't fucking say[6:12:09]   I was so excited about what you were going through[6:12:13]   This is what George said[6:12:15]   When I met you and I heard about the ten allegations[6:12:17]   And all those anus crimes[6:12:19]   I was so excited[6:12:21]   About what you were going through[6:12:23]   This is strange, isn't it?[6:12:25]   This is what I mean[6:12:27]   Why do they treat it like this?[6:12:29]   Do they do it?[6:12:31]   Is George doing it because it's like, in his mind[6:12:33]   All he's caring about is[6:12:35]   It's nice to see somebody get cancelled[6:12:37]   So[6:12:39]   If I ever get cancelled for anything[6:12:41]   I'll be able to get through it[6:12:43]   But not really realizing this is about[6:12:45]   Great[6:12:47]   I was so excited[6:12:49]   When you were going through all that stuff[6:12:51]   When I first met you, bro[6:12:53]   I was just so excited about what you were going through[6:12:55]   And I couldn't fucking say that to you[6:12:57]   Because I was like, that's going to come off really weird[6:12:59]   But you could have[6:13:01]   All the money in the world[6:13:03]   All the power in the world[6:13:06]   But if you're not grateful for it[6:13:08]   If you don't know how to appreciate it[6:13:10]   If you don't know what it's worth[6:13:12]   Then it becomes meaningless[6:13:14]   And so like[6:13:16]   I like to use God because I'm using God[6:13:18]   You know this guy[6:13:20]   118.50[6:13:22]   Here we come[6:13:24]   Just trying to skip through this extendo[6:13:26]   End part[6:13:28]   Okay[6:13:29]   We're almost there[6:13:31]   Before the remarks[6:13:34]   Having a kid was the first time[6:13:36]   I actually[6:13:38]   And it's[6:13:40]   You know, embarrassing to say[6:13:42]   But it's the first time that I[6:13:44]   Was like, oh I have to live outside myself[6:13:46]   And not live selfishly[6:13:48]   At fucking 40, 39[6:13:50]   But it's the truth[6:13:52]   If that's what[6:13:54]   He's taught me[6:13:56]   Then beautiful[6:13:58]   Yeah, absolutely[6:14:00]   How dare you[6:14:03]   It's not a journey[6:14:05]   To rape ten girls[6:14:07]   Allegedly[6:14:09]   It's not a journey[6:14:11]   People are so confused[6:14:13]   About what cancelling is[6:14:15]   See this word cancelling[6:14:17]   Everyone gets used to it, I was cancelled, I was cancelled[6:14:19]   They think they're all in one group of people who[6:14:21]   The woke mob came after[6:14:23]   And it was all a misunderstanding[6:14:25]   But they learned from it[6:14:27]   They grew[6:14:29]   And now they're amazing[6:14:31]   They're the best[6:14:33]   This is what's going on[6:14:35]   Shauna Delarica[6:14:37]   Is doing this[6:14:39]   She must be cancelled herself[6:14:41]   You know what's funny[6:14:43]   That's just a little you[6:14:45]   I know, I know[6:14:47]   I know, I know[6:14:49]   But also half my wife[6:14:51]   Do you see more yourself or your wife[6:14:53]   And your kids?[6:14:55]   Different[6:14:57]   How can you even talk to a younger girl[6:14:59]   At this point[6:15:01]   Without remembering what you've done[6:15:03]   Do you want to see this bitch cry?[6:15:05]   120.55[6:15:07]   120.55 we're going to see him cry[6:15:09]   And notice[6:15:11]   The Abrams method[6:15:13]   Of crying in cinema[6:15:15]   On full effect[6:15:17]   You can go frame by frame[6:15:19]   See Abrams in every frame[6:15:21]   And he's used this[6:15:23]   Same crying technique[6:15:25]   That he learned from acting[6:15:27]   From the Abrams Academy[6:15:29]   He's used this[6:15:31]   On three different podcasts[6:15:33]   And we've actually compared the cries[6:15:35]   And you can[6:15:37]   Trust us here[6:15:39]   We talked to some experts from these acting[6:15:41]   Classes and they said[6:15:43]   That's Abrams[6:15:45]   So when Chris cries on these[6:15:47]   Podcasts[6:15:49]   This is fully intentional[6:15:51]   We're in the process right now of trying to dig up[6:15:53]   Exactly the triggers[6:15:55]   He's using from Abrams[6:15:57]   To activate the emotion[6:15:59]   I think we'll see him here[6:16:01]   Let's take a look[6:16:13]   So crossing your arms[6:16:15]   Crosses the arms[6:16:17]   Abrams says always cross your arms[6:16:19]   Yes that's the big thing[6:16:21]   Always cross your arms[6:16:23]   Get yourself in that moment and think about[6:16:25]   And of course Chris's cry trigger[6:16:27]   Is this Calvin[6:16:31]   He's probably picturing how ugly that bitch is[6:16:35]   But he looks, he pictures Calvin[6:16:37]   And then I think he[6:16:39]   Tells himself like picture Calvin[6:16:41]   Getting hit by a fire truck[6:16:43]   And being squashed into the ground[6:16:45]   And you run out there and he's just dead meat and worms[6:16:47]   And then picture that[6:16:49]   And then he'll get himself to cry[6:16:51]   Every time[6:16:53]   Over this Calvin[6:16:55]   And here it is[6:16:57]   Question[6:16:59]   I know[6:17:01]   It's true[6:17:03]   Someone in the chat[6:17:08]   Has some other insights into the Abrams method[6:17:10]   They say you cross your arms[6:17:12]   And then pinch your sides[6:17:14]   Oh that's what he's doing[6:17:16]   Yes he's doing, of course yes[6:17:18]   The Abrams method isn't just to cross your arms[6:17:20]   It's to pinch your sides with your nail[6:17:22]   And twist[6:17:24]   Wow that could help too[6:17:26]   That could give you some more of the physical[6:17:28]   You know pain going through your body[6:17:30]   As well to show that you're really feeling it[6:17:32]   Oh so people know Abrams then[6:17:34]   Yes we all know[6:17:36]   Oh okay good[6:17:38]   I'm glad that you guys are up to date on that[6:17:40]   And you can tell anybody[6:17:42]   Abrams sent you[6:17:44]   Hard[6:17:46]   To understand[6:17:51]   But you know who you are[6:17:53]   And you may not[6:17:55]   Feel that way[6:17:57]   Especially[6:17:59]   What you're saying if I'm talking to him as he's 16[6:18:01]   Um[6:18:03]   But you know who you are[6:18:05]   And[6:18:07]   I guess I just want[6:18:11]   I[6:18:13]   I was always[6:18:15]   I feel like I wanted somebody to tell me[6:18:17]   That I am good[6:18:19]   And I'm[6:18:21]   Like worthy[6:18:23]   To say the way I am you know[6:18:25]   And I don't know like I had great parents[6:18:27]   But I feel like[6:18:29]   Abrams method think about your parents[6:18:31]   You're enough[6:18:33]   You're enough[6:18:35]   Because you're you[6:18:37]   And that's[6:18:39]   This is all Abrams[6:18:41]   What I[6:18:43]   I would want them to know that[6:18:45]   You don't need anything else[6:18:47]   Um[6:18:49]   And you got to feel all your feelings[6:18:51]   That sucks because I hate doing that[6:18:53]   This tricks everybody[6:18:55]   Really? Every comment[6:18:57]   Will be like oh my god he's so[6:18:59]   Vulnerable and so open and[6:19:01]   Aware of himself[6:19:03]   It's incredible how much he's grown[6:19:05]   Bravo I like him even more[6:19:07]   That he did all that stuff and is acting like this[6:19:09]   Now that's what these[6:19:11]   Psychos do it's like when they hear charity[6:19:13]   They get all excited[6:19:15]   That's what these psychos do now[6:19:17]   They love growth[6:19:19]   Allegations isn't enough for people[6:19:21]   How many allegations does it need to be?[6:19:23]   Before it doesn't matter how[6:19:25]   Great he is at growth[6:19:27]   If he did that[6:19:29]   Okay he has one allegation[6:19:31]   Okay he has two allegations[6:19:33]   Okay he has three allegations[6:19:35]   But he has like forty[6:19:37]   It's so many people and it's so many[6:19:41]   Twisted stories[6:19:43]   But you love the growth and you love the[6:19:45]   Just because he cried[6:19:47]   This could trick H3 this performance[6:19:49]   We and have a hundred million fans tomorrow[6:19:51]   New fans[6:19:53]   They're dying to forgive these pedos[6:19:55]   It's crazy[6:19:57]   Isn't that nuts?[6:19:59]   I wonder if they just get caught up[6:20:01]   They're just such brain dead bimbos[6:20:03]   Like George and his girlfriend[6:20:05]   They're not thinking about it right?[6:20:07]   I would love to confront one of these people about this[6:20:09]   You know imagine you're sitting with[6:20:11]   Shawna Dela Rica and you go Shawna[6:20:13]   Read this article[6:20:15]   Watch this video read this article[6:20:17]   Did you know this before?[6:20:19]   You're just learning it now?[6:20:21]   Shawna Dela Rica is a cute little girl in Hollywood[6:20:23]   Doesn't she know how to[6:20:25]   Recognize a creep by now?[6:20:27]   It's really bad[6:20:29]   The type of girl that he's preying on is you[6:20:31]   You could be his next victim[6:20:33]   Now that you've allowed him into the house[6:20:35]   Abrams always advises[6:20:37]   To put a finger on the lips[6:20:39]   Yes[6:20:41]   This is all Abrams I mean you can see it in the eyes[6:20:43]   Pretty dry[6:20:45]   Wow[6:20:47]   It's about the appearance of crying[6:20:49]   There's no tear coming down[6:20:51]   No there's no tear[6:20:53]   But people all thought that he cried[6:20:55]   He really opened up[6:20:57]   And he's doing this on all the podcasts[6:20:59]   And it's exactly paced like this[6:21:01]   In every one of the podcasts that he does[6:21:03]   But you have to feel all your feelings[6:21:05]   You can't run from those[6:21:07]   Which I did[6:21:09]   I built this whole career[6:21:11]   Off of just making people laugh[6:21:13]   And never being able to[6:21:15]   Confront the sad moments[6:21:17]   And the dark sides[6:21:19]   And the tribulations[6:21:21]   I would just[6:21:23]   Find the humor in it[6:21:25]   And run from that[6:21:27]   That is something that is[6:21:29]   Only going to bite you in the ass[6:21:31]   So make sure to feel all the feelings[6:21:33]   And find good things to do[6:21:35]   To cope with it[6:21:37]   But yeah you know who you are[6:21:39]   Don't let other people[6:21:41]   Tell you who you are[6:21:43]   And it may be hard to find out[6:21:45]   Truly who you are[6:21:47]   But you already know and you just have to[6:21:49]   Get through life figuring out[6:21:51]   Figuring that out[6:21:53]   So I guess that's[6:21:55]   What I would tell him[6:21:57]   That was a lot of words[6:21:59]   That was perfect[6:22:01]   And she starts crying too[6:22:03]   Wow[6:22:05]   You are[6:22:07]   Wait pause[6:22:09]   Abrams always says[6:22:11]   If you're not able to get out a tear[6:22:13]   Blow your nose[6:22:15]   Yes a loud dry nose blow[6:22:17]   Into the Kleenex[6:22:19]   Listen to that[6:22:21]   Let's hear it for snot[6:22:23]   You are[6:22:25]   That was dry[6:22:27]   So then it makes it look like[6:22:29]   Something big is going on up there[6:22:31]   With your sinuses[6:22:33]   You're not crying you don't need the tissue[6:22:35]   You know a guy is doing Abrams[6:22:37]   When he's tearing up and you offer him[6:22:39]   A tissue and he says yeah[6:22:41]   And except like if you ever said[6:22:43]   Guy really tried[6:22:45]   Yeah so if some guy tried to hand me a tissue[6:22:47]   You're dead[6:22:49]   So yeah[6:22:51]   When you're doing Abrams you're taking the tissue[6:22:53]   It's all part of the big act[6:22:55]   When I first[6:22:57]   Abrams made a killing off this method too in the 50's[6:22:59]   He really[6:23:01]   Cleaned up everybody was using his method[6:23:03]   Okay can I confess something[6:23:05]   We made up the Abrams method[6:23:07]   But wouldn't it be funny[6:23:09]   If like Xander or one of these[6:23:11]   Artistic guys[6:23:13]   Made a web page[6:23:15]   About Abrams method and then[6:23:17]   Every time you see a guy cry[6:23:19]   Add traits[6:23:21]   So just take all the traits[6:23:23]   Chris shows and then[6:23:25]   Say that they're part of the Abrams method[6:23:27]   Put it on a website and then people[6:23:29]   Could refer[6:23:31]   To this site it's right here[6:23:33]   This is exactly what he did[6:23:35]   Anything you can think of just add to that[6:23:37]   And then whenever someone's doing this[6:23:39]   Because people will believe that especially with the name[6:23:41]   Abrams behind it[6:23:43]   Classic Abrams method[6:23:45]   This site[6:23:47]   Make sure you add the word cinema in there[6:23:49]   Just some AI picture[6:23:51]   And you could make like a fake book[6:23:53]   Called like[6:23:55]   Tearing up in cinema[6:23:57]   Tearing cinema[6:23:59]   Something like that[6:24:01]   Yeah he's your typical[6:24:03]   Famous acting code[6:24:05]   AI book cover[6:24:07]   Do a whole new AI website[6:24:09]   Make him say a bunch of shit about the Abrams method[6:24:11]   A Jewish guy sitting on a stool being like[6:24:13]   The Abrams method[6:24:15]   It's been used[6:24:17]   In everything you know[6:24:19]   I think Gene Cusinau vibes[6:24:21]   Please let's get this[6:24:23]   Up and running[6:24:25]   I like this Abrams[6:24:27]   Okay here George[6:24:29]   I want to hear from George right here[6:24:31]   You are[6:24:33]   When I first[6:24:35]   Met you bro like[6:24:37]   You were so unbelievably[6:24:39]   Opening for me[6:24:41]   He met him during all the scandals[6:24:43]   I don't know if I have to be the one to remind you dude[6:24:45]   But you're an amazing human being[6:24:47]   Thanks dude[6:24:49]   How do you even take that from[6:24:51]   He goes thanks dude[6:24:53]   Thanks dude[6:24:55]   This means a lot to me[6:24:57]   See he likes hearing that[6:24:59]   Even though he knows he doesn't deserve that[6:25:01]   He knows it's not true[6:25:03]   But he does like the sound of it[6:25:05]   You know it's like a big hug from a[6:25:07]   Big mom[6:25:09]   And he loves that feeling he doesn't get this feeling[6:25:11]   From other guys and now this guy is[6:25:13]   Going ahead and saying this on a podcast[6:25:15]   Lending this[6:25:17]   Idea out there[6:25:19]   That he could use hey look at this[6:25:21]   This guy sees it[6:25:23]   That's me[6:25:25]   And you just soak it all up with that sick[6:25:27]   Thanks man[6:25:29]   You're an amazing human being[6:25:31]   Thanks dude[6:25:35]   That's so[6:25:37]   Dramatic bro[6:25:39]   That is so[6:25:41]   Thanks dude[6:25:43]   You're gonna let someone talk to you like that[6:25:45]   You're gonna let look at this[6:25:47]   You know and I don't know if I have to be the one to remind you dude[6:25:49]   But you're an amazing human being[6:25:51]   Thanks dude[6:25:53]   And also George is just playing[6:25:55]   The long game trying to become friends[6:25:57]   Yes he doesn't even know anything about Chris[6:25:59]   He didn't know Chris did his podcast[6:26:01]   Without guests he didn't know Chris[6:26:03]   Had a podcast with his brother[6:26:05]   He didn't know the names of Chris' specials[6:26:07]   He doesn't know anything about Chris[6:26:09]   But I am[6:26:11]   Obsessed with you[6:26:13]   I don't know if I have to be the one to remind you dude[6:26:15]   But you're an amazing human being[6:26:17]   Thanks dude[6:26:19]   This is so sneaky because what George is doing[6:26:21]   Is using this opportunity when Chris[6:26:23]   Is at his lowest to sneak[6:26:25]   In and become[6:26:27]   Celebrity friends with celebrity[6:26:29]   Comedian Chris D'Elia[6:26:31]   He's taking him while he's cheap[6:26:33]   You know he's buying while it's cheap[6:26:35]   While the stock is cheap[6:26:37]   He gets in there you know maybe in ten years they forgive[6:26:39]   Chris and he's the biggest comic and now George[6:26:41]   Is within those circles[6:26:43]   That's sick to buy low[6:26:45]   That's what he's doing right[6:26:47]   He learned that from Logan[6:26:49]   Who learned it from Gary V[6:26:51]   Who created it[6:26:54]   I saw this video of Gary V[6:26:56]   Who was just like[6:26:58]   Guys just get on every social media[6:27:00]   I know you're like Threads is stupid[6:27:02]   Just go on there and give it a chance[6:27:04]   Okay you're never gonna make it anywhere in life[6:27:06]   If you don't just give it a chance[6:27:08]   Get on Threads follow me[6:27:10]   It was insane it was like[6:27:12]   Are you working for Threads? A lot of guys are working[6:27:14]   For Threads Amanda Cerny I saw[6:27:16]   Shilling for Threads[6:27:18]   It's disgusting when you see people do that[6:27:20]   Because it's like no no no let us make our own[6:27:22]   Decisions about this[6:27:24]   Gary V demanded[6:27:26]   That everybody stop bitching and join[6:27:28]   Threads and start using its interface[6:27:30]   Immediately[6:27:34]   It's like he gets something off the bottom[6:27:36]   End the top end[6:27:38]   Okay here's George[6:27:40]   Look at George you are an amazing[6:27:42]   Person why is he amazing?[6:27:44]   Because[6:27:46]   You steal from his act[6:27:48]   Bardar[6:27:52]   Bro you're far past worth it[6:27:54]   I think[6:27:56]   Look at him[6:27:58]   You're far past[6:28:00]   Worth it[6:28:02]   Bro you're far past worth it[6:28:04]   Look at his eyes[6:28:06]   What the fuck is far past worth it[6:28:08]   What the fuck is far past[6:28:10]   Worth it how much longer could I agree[6:28:12]   To this before I've completely sold[6:28:14]   My soul[6:28:16]   And that's what I mean[6:28:18]   You can't agree with far past worth it[6:28:20]   Chris on his[6:28:22]   Sorry not cancelled[6:28:24]   Congratulations podcast[6:28:26]   Is like he's on there being like[6:28:28]   This dude came up to me[6:28:30]   And said[6:28:32]   I was far past worth it[6:28:34]   And I was like[6:28:36]   Bro[6:28:38]   And then you're like[6:28:40]   And then he's here allowing this[6:28:42]   To come out of Jenga like this is not him[6:28:44]   This isn't your personality[6:28:46]   Like how do his fans from his other podcast[6:28:48]   Watch this and allow it[6:28:50]   This isn't how you act when you're bouncing[6:28:52]   Off the walls and being Mr. Cool Guy[6:28:54]   Everyday[6:28:56]   Why are you acting like this?[6:28:58]   Well they probably think oh he must have some[6:29:00]   Huge connection with this boy[6:29:02]   George[6:29:04]   I guess he does[6:29:06]   Big connection with this little guy[6:29:08]   Imagine letting a kid like[6:29:10]   This tell you you're okay[6:29:12]   The Abrams method too[6:29:14]   Far past worth it[6:29:16]   This looks like one of Abrams fucking balls[6:29:18]   Love it[6:29:20]   Oh[6:29:22]   Is that a bad look[6:29:24]   I can't get over that[6:29:26]   I think it's a little slimmer[6:29:28]   On the sides but he's got these headphones[6:29:30]   On so it makes it look like a perfect little[6:29:32]   Annie like an ice spice type of[6:29:34]   Haircut[6:29:36]   Which is extremely degrading[6:29:38]   Alright let's see[6:29:40]   Bro you're far past worth it[6:29:42]   I think[6:29:44]   You just stepping up to the plate[6:29:46]   And finding out[6:29:48]   Who your demons are for your family[6:29:50]   I[6:29:52]   Know men good men bro[6:29:54]   Great men that run away from that[6:29:56]   And you took it[6:29:58]   On your shoulders bro[6:30:00]   I could not be more proud[6:30:02]   To tell the world I'm friends with you bro[6:30:04]   I really love you bro[6:30:06]   Thank you so much for being here[6:30:08]   Thank you guys really[6:30:10]   I really appreciate it[6:30:12]   You made me so emotional[6:30:14]   I mean he can't even believe this[6:30:16]   He can not[6:30:18]   This is too far for him[6:30:20]   He's over the moon[6:30:22]   I mean he can't believe[6:30:24]   That two people like this are telling him[6:30:26]   How amazing and special he is[6:30:28]   She's crying[6:30:30]   It was just[6:30:32]   It's from your heart[6:30:34]   And you know you can feel that[6:30:36]   I'm too much of an emotional person to watch you[6:30:38]   I'll tell you I didn't cry for like fucking[6:30:40]   40 years and then now it's just like every day[6:30:42]   So I'm catching up it's okay[6:30:44]   Just so much beautiful it's sad[6:30:46]   You cry beautiful you cry it's like[6:30:48]   So much man[6:30:50]   Well I'm happy to see you taking it in[6:30:52]   Though that means you're enjoying life[6:30:54]   You're understanding what it is[6:30:56]   I feel like when you weren't crying[6:30:58]   When you weren't opening up bro you were just[6:31:00]   Living life on fast forward like through the moment[6:31:02]   Yeah I'm glad you're here[6:31:04]   You're here with us bro[6:31:06]   I'm very proud of you bro[6:31:08]   Love you dude[6:31:10]   Love you[6:31:12]   Love you[6:31:14]   You see how far this is going[6:31:16]   I know it sounds like your general pleasantries[6:31:18]   But listen to this[6:31:20]   I'm glad you're here with us bro[6:31:22]   I'm very proud of you bro[6:31:24]   Love you dude[6:31:26]   Love you[6:31:28]   You're in love with George Janko[6:31:30]   You love him[6:31:32]   I mean come on[6:31:34]   He can't even believe[6:31:36]   He said that love you dude[6:31:38]   You just[6:31:40]   Look at the look in his eyes right now[6:31:42]   He can't believe he's gone[6:31:44]   This far[6:31:49]   Love you dude[6:31:51]   Glad you're here with us bro[6:31:53]   I'm very proud of you bro[6:31:55]   Love you dude[6:31:57]   I'm here because of people like you man no joke for real[6:31:59]   Nah dude you are here because you put yourself through[6:32:01]   You did it not only did you make yourself[6:32:03]   Successful you accomplished your dreams[6:32:05]   But when shit got tough[6:32:07]   You didn't talk away like a bitch and run away[6:32:09]   You said nah nah nah[6:32:11]   I'm gonna make sure my kids go through this[6:32:13]   And I'll never forget this[6:32:15]   I asked you when I was[6:32:17]   The laugh factor I go what's pushing you bro[6:32:19]   And you said I'm doing this for my kid[6:32:21]   And I just want[6:32:23]   I don't know if your kids ever[6:32:25]   So he allegedly raped[6:32:27]   10 women[6:32:29]   But because he still has the nerve[6:32:31]   To do stand up[6:32:33]   And take money[6:32:35]   That makes him amazing[6:32:37]   What is so amazing[6:32:39]   About this story[6:32:41]   I just don't get it[6:32:43]   I don't get what they've concocted in their heads[6:32:45]   Is the story behind here[6:32:47]   And you said I'm doing this for my kid[6:32:49]   And I just want[6:32:51]   I don't know if your kid's ever gonna wash us when he's older[6:32:53]   So this kid thing like worked[6:32:55]   Even better than he thought[6:32:57]   I'll just pretend[6:32:59]   I'm the father of the year and that I love this kid[6:33:01]   And that actually worked[6:33:03]   So there's a tip for you guys out there[6:33:05]   If you get busted doing anything[6:33:07]   Quickly do a whole song and dance about your fucking son[6:33:09]   This is what the world[6:33:11]   Opens him right up[6:33:13]   You can say whatever[6:33:15]   Do whatever you want[6:33:17]   As long as you have a son[6:33:19]   And you earn money for the son[6:33:21]   Still[6:33:23]   Everything that you became now[6:33:25]   I could certainly stay[6:33:27]   On everything that I've ever done[6:33:29]   I know because it was for Calvin[6:33:31]   And not William too[6:33:33]   But he wasn't around at the time[6:33:35]   Wasn't around during the sex[6:33:37]   It was for Calvin and now it's for both of them[6:33:39]   Love you bro, thank you so much for being here[6:33:41]   Thank you so much[6:33:43]   I'll see you guys next time[6:33:57]   Bye bye, do a quick cool down here okay[6:33:59]   See you soon[6:34:57]   Who sees me naked[6:35:01]   When the bed sheets[6:35:03]   Read blood from the pressure[6:35:07]   Plastic Catholic priests[6:35:09]   Wash from the drifter[6:35:13]   Wet the flour and[6:35:15]   Whisk it together[6:35:19]   That's just for good measure[6:35:22]   That's just for good measure[6:35:26]   I can't carry the weight[6:35:28]   Of my feelings[6:35:30]   No[6:35:32]   No[6:35:34]   No[6:35:36]   No[6:35:41]   I can't carry the weight[6:35:43]   Of my feelings[6:35:45]   No[6:35:47]   No[6:35:49]   I can't carry the weight[6:35:51]   Of my feelings[6:36:04]   I can't carry you[6:36:06]   Fuck like you're eating[6:36:10]   Your smile's like[6:36:12]   Lines in the concrete[6:36:16]   Through the towel and[6:36:18]   Tired of baking[6:36:24]   I've never seen me naked[6:36:28]   I can't stay[6:36:40]   From the moment I first met you[6:36:44]   I can't stay[6:36:52]   Fuck[6:37:20]   Cut[6:37:42]   This is gonna be so fucking awesome[6:37:44]   This is gonna be awesome[6:37:48]   This is gonna be so cute[6:37:50]   And awesome[6:37:52]   Awesome[6:37:54]   Thank you[6:38:22]   Cause I've made some real big mistakes[6:38:26]   But you make the worst ones look fine[6:38:30]   I should have known[6:38:32]   It was strange[6:38:34]   You only come out at night[6:38:36]   I used to think[6:38:38]   I was smart[6:38:40]   But you made me look so naive[6:38:44]   The way you sold me for parts[6:38:48]   Sunk your teeth into me[6:38:50]   You're a blood sucker[6:38:54]   Famed fucker[6:38:56]   Bleeding me dry like a goddamn vampire[6:39:00]   Thank you[6:39:02]   And every girl I ever talked to[6:39:04]   Told me you were bad[6:39:06]   Bad news you called them crazy[6:39:08]   God I hate the way I call them crazy too[6:39:10]   You're so convincing[6:39:12]   How do you lie without flinching?[6:39:16]   Oh what a mesmerizing[6:39:18]   Paralyzing[6:39:20]   Fucked up little thrill[6:39:22]   Can't figure out just how you do it[6:39:24]   And God knows I never will[6:39:26]   Went for me and not her[6:39:28]   Cause girls your age no better[6:39:30]   I've made some real big mistakes[6:39:32]   But you make the worst ones look fine[6:39:36]   I should have known[6:39:38]   It was strange[6:39:40]   You only come out at night[6:39:42]   I used to think[6:39:44]   I was smart[6:39:46]   But you made me look so naive[6:39:50]   The way you sold me for parts[6:39:52]   You sunk your teeth into me[6:39:56]   You're a blood sucker[6:40:00]   Famed fucker[6:40:02]   Bleeding me dry like a goddamn vampire[6:40:06]   Thank you[6:40:08]   You said it was true love[6:40:10]   But wouldn't that be hard[6:40:12]   You can't love anyone[6:40:14]   Cause that would mean you had a heart[6:40:16]   I tried to help you out[6:40:18]   Don't know how I can't[6:40:20]   Cause how you think's the kind of thing I'll never understand[6:40:28]   I've made some real big mistakes[6:40:32]   But you make the worst ones look fine[6:40:36]   I should have known[6:40:38]   It was strange[6:40:40]   You only come out at night[6:40:42]   I used to think[6:40:44]   I was smart[6:40:46]   But you made me look so naive[6:40:48]   The way you sold me for parts[6:40:52]   You sunk your teeth into me[6:40:56]   You're a blood sucker[6:40:58]   Famed fucker[6:41:00]   Bleeding me dry like a goddamn vampire