episode: RED BAR RADIO S21 E01
mentions
transcript
[0:00:00] We're rolling.[0:00:02] I notice something feel tight[0:00:04] and the enemy's speed ain't walking to right.[0:00:06] Don't make a backup.[0:00:07] I say, look darling, Leno,[0:00:09] you are the man digging here before.[0:00:11] Okay, okay, okay.[0:00:17] Turning.[0:00:30] Yeah.[0:01:00] And now you're under my control.[0:01:15] Oh.[0:01:19] Nice.[0:01:20] Okay.[0:01:30] Yeah guys,[0:01:31] this is a really good song.[0:01:33] Yeah, it's gonna be a really good show.[0:01:37] We're just getting started.[0:01:38] Yeah, season 21.[0:01:40] Thank you.[0:01:41] Thank you.[0:01:42] Hi.[0:01:43] Season 21, everybody.[0:01:44] Hi.[0:01:45] We're back.[0:01:46] Hey.[0:01:47] What's going on?[0:01:48] Hi, Jules.[0:01:49] We also have Jules in the house.[0:01:50] What's up?[0:01:51] What's up?[0:01:52] Jules in the house.[0:01:53] This is gonna be a very difficult podcast.[0:01:54] Season 21, everybody.[0:01:55] Hi.[0:01:56] We're a few days late.[0:01:57] Okay.[0:01:58] Do you wanna hear the story[0:01:59] or do you wanna hear the story[0:02:00] I'm telling?[0:02:01] Tell me.[0:02:02] Tell me.[0:02:03] Tell me.[0:02:04] Tell me.[0:02:05] Tell me.[0:02:06] Tell me.[0:02:07] Tell me.[0:02:08] Tell me.[0:02:09] This is the story I'm telling people.[0:02:12] The story, that one.[0:02:14] Yeah.[0:02:15] So, uh, um, yeah.[0:02:17] The truth of the matter is,[0:02:18] um, well now it sounds like[0:02:20] I'm setting up a bit.[0:02:21] I,[0:02:22] I let my health get the best of me[0:02:24] and I'm ashamed.[0:02:28] Not as strong as I thought I was.[0:02:30] And, uh...[0:02:31] What started as a little harmless meatloaf[0:02:35] turned into a four-day[0:02:36] pain train. Listen, I don't like bumming people out.[0:02:40] I don't like talking about my condition. Okay.[0:02:45] Could you imagine having your own condition? It's, uh,[0:02:49] it's very embarrassing. So I like to just skip over it.[0:02:53] If you don't hear from me, it means that, uh,[0:02:55] you should feel really bad for me.[0:02:57] It means that I'm quivering in pain and that I'm not,[0:03:03] uh, doing well physically, but I've,[0:03:06] sort of brought myself back together again over the last four days when I got[0:03:10] something very exciting to share with you. Uh,[0:03:14] today's episode is going to be very reminiscent of some old[0:03:19] time.[0:03:21] Some very old times. Summer of joy.[0:03:25] I've got a little gold on here today for the new summer.[0:03:30] Kevin Brennan thought we were taking off for the summer.[0:03:33] I couldn't believe it. We're here for the summer.[0:03:40] Let me get all my adjustments ready. Okay. It's been a hell of a morning,[0:03:45] an even crazier night,[0:03:48] but what's going to make this show quite fascinating is I've got a little[0:03:52] loopiness to me, which I haven't had in years.[0:03:56] I haven't started a show like this in years.[0:03:57] I used to do shows like this when I was younger. When I was younger,[0:04:02] what would happen is I would have very little sleep, right?[0:04:06] You remember those days when you were younger and you'd get up and you'd feel[0:04:09] kind of cracked out,[0:04:10] but you'd feel happy about it and laughy and a little bit[0:04:14] goofy. That's what happened to me last night.[0:04:18] Last night is the first time I suffered from, I can't sleep.[0:04:21] I'm too excited.[0:04:25] So yes, I'm very excited. I've got what?[0:04:27] Jules here 14 days of stuff built up in my head,[0:04:31] ready to tell everybody about I'm extremely excited.[0:04:34] And I was so excited last night that I couldn't sleep. I got to bed at three.[0:04:39] I woke up at seven and then I, uh,[0:04:43] screamed it by herself till now. So I'm a little nuts,[0:04:48] but I think it's going to make for a fun thing. Old fashioned time.[0:04:52] We got our air conditioning fixed. Thanks for your concern about that.[0:04:56] A lot of people emailing me is if I don't have the means to get the[0:05:00] AC fixed. Well, they were wrong. I've got the means. We got it fixed.[0:05:05] It's beautiful in here. It's a beautiful 63 degrees.[0:05:10] Are you guys excited for season 21?[0:05:14] I know Jules is excited. She might quit this year.[0:05:19] Yeah, right. Where am I going to work then?[0:05:21] We've got a couple of fans on, so you might hear a little, but don't worry.[0:05:25] That's keeping everything good. We're going to try.[0:05:28] We're waiting. If we want to spend $15,000 to add a quieter AC back here.[0:05:34] So we had the AC guy come in. It was a blast. He was really, seriously,[0:05:38] he couldn't have been a night of chilled air.[0:05:43] He couldn't have been a nicer guy. And, uh,[0:05:46] it was the first time that I really,[0:05:47] I was like so happy with an AC repairman. He came in, he did his job.[0:05:52] It was only a $400 mistake.[0:05:56] $400 mistake.[0:05:59] That's a line from an apocalypse Hoboken song. And I remember as a kid,[0:06:04] Oh, a $400 mistake. That's, that's a lot of money now.[0:06:09] I don't know.[0:06:10] It was only $400 to fix the part that I broke by turning it down to[0:06:15] 55 overnight.[0:06:17] I'm going to be wearing some wearable vitamins today to help[0:06:22] metabolize myself. We'll see how that goes.[0:06:25] A full disclosure. I've got a five hour energy in me.[0:06:28] I've got one of these on the arm. This is just a B vitamin patch.[0:06:33] They're selling wearable vitamins everywhere now. And then,[0:06:38] uh, right after the show, we're going to do a no days wasted.[0:06:41] 9 a.m. Not a big deal. You ever seen these packets? Jules,[0:06:46] people like this, the faggot pack. Just saying that.[0:06:49] So people know it's not an ad[0:06:51] Ooh.[0:06:53] Before they all start going ad, ad, ad, I hate.[0:06:56] You could say faggot. I heard Matt Healy say faggot the other day,[0:07:02] our buddy from come town, Matt Healy. All right,[0:07:05] let's get into the drinking and the celebrating. Uh,[0:07:09] we're sorry that we kept you waiting. Nobody is sorry than me.[0:07:15] Uh, but you're going to forget about that very soon. You know,[0:07:17] it's going to be a thing of the past very soon.[0:07:19] Nobody's going to be typing up a comment.[0:07:23] I saw a comment yesterday, broke my heart. I'm sick in bed,[0:07:27] cursing myself, shivering, thinking that, Oh,[0:07:31] I'm back to this. Maybe it's a summer thing. Maybe when the summer starts,[0:07:35] I get sick again. Again, if you're new here,[0:07:39] I have this condition that I'm living with.[0:07:43] I might have a hernia too.[0:07:45] Got a nice lump here on my waist.[0:07:48] That's making Jules very sad and scared,[0:07:52] but I don't think it's a hernia.[0:07:54] I think it's a swollen lymph node from an infection into my leg.[0:08:01] I hope not either. Let's hope not. God forbid. God forbid,[0:08:06] but I'm going to be fine. Here's what you got to know about me. I, uh,[0:08:09] I,[0:08:11] the mountains I'm climbing to do all[0:08:16] this, uh, proves that I have the strength to,[0:08:22] uh, really do this. Well, you have nothing to worry about. Okay.[0:08:25] Welcome to season 21. We're by the way, you know,[0:08:30] our seasons are the same. Everything's the same.[0:08:32] We only upgrade when organically needed. Okay.[0:08:36] We only change things around. So you don't got to worry. Oh,[0:08:39] it's season 21 going to bring the same types of laughs as[0:08:44] season 20 from last week.[0:08:48] It will be entirely the same except for much better. Okay.[0:08:54] People are saying lumps are actually cool now. So. Well, I don't know. You know,[0:08:59] I, again, I don't like to bum people out.[0:09:00] If I told you what was going on with me, you'd be sitting there.[0:09:04] You'd be weeping throughout the show instead of a weeping, laughing, uh,[0:09:08] with tears of laughter. They say you'd be weeping. You'd feel so bad for me.[0:09:13] So think about that when you write your comment. Oh, where's this show? Oh,[0:09:19] where did he go? You've been lied to.[0:09:25] Okay. But think about how much, how horrible it is. And imagine me.[0:09:30] I want people to be thinking about me as if I'm like a family member to you.[0:09:35] You know what I mean? I don't want you to think that I'm just, um,[0:09:39] host. I'm a family member to you. Okay.[0:09:42] And you got to think of me dearly, right? Jules,[0:09:47] let's get this party started. Get me some drinking music here.[0:09:52] Let's share a drink. Let's celebrate season 21.[0:09:56] This is going to be an excellent app by the way. You've tuned in.[0:10:00] You're really excited for the series. Give me some better,[0:10:03] something more exciting for drinking here. It's 21 Savage. Of course.[0:10:08] Here we are. Welcome to red bar. The assorted jelly beans.[0:10:19] How good is that? One more.[0:10:25] This is what I listened to now.[0:10:27] Nobody[0:10:37] does a band like this anymore. It's too gay.[0:10:42] This is all I like now. Rap is over.[0:10:48] Here everybody.[0:10:57] Whoa.[0:11:04] All right. Welcome to season 21. We've got an excellent show.[0:11:07] This is basically a hundred gags, a hundred gags did steal[0:11:13] the wildness, the obnoxiousness of this song. Listen to these boys.[0:11:22] Nobody sings like that anymore. They're afraid. Uh, speaking of fear,[0:11:27] I didn't know how big a hit this jelly roll would be.[0:11:32] Jelly roll. You know, he's a lips. He's a form of a lips.[0:11:37] He's a donkey lips. Uh, he's, you know, jelly lips. You've got donkey lips.[0:11:42] Who else was like a lips character that we just saw this week? There's like,[0:11:46] Oh, there's a guy on that new,[0:11:48] that Netflix barbecue show that reminded me of Don.[0:11:52] What's this new Netflix barbecue show called?[0:11:54] We love this with Melissa Cookston. Have you seen,[0:11:59] you know, I, uh, we,[0:12:00] we talked about this Netflix barbecue show last season when it came out,[0:12:05] not our season, their, their season.[0:12:07] And I was obsessed with this judge. They have Melissa[0:12:12] Cookston. Do you know her?[0:12:15] I guess we might've brought her up on the show,[0:12:17] but somebody messaged me when season two was coming up. They go, Mike,[0:12:21] season two of the barbecue show. And what's it called? Jewels by the way.[0:12:24] I honestly have no fucking clue.[0:12:25] You got to come up with something. Just say something like Netflix barbecue.[0:12:30] How to barbecue. Right. I think of how to barbecue. Right. Every time.[0:12:35] Uh, but they scared me. They, they go, Mike, you know, the show,[0:12:38] barbecue showdown, barbecue showdown. Have you seen this with Melissa Cookston?[0:12:42] This is a good show. And, uh, they're doing it right.[0:12:46] They got great judges. You know, Melissa, you've got the big black guy.[0:12:49] He's like, get out of my office. That kind of black eye,[0:12:54] him and Melissa together when they're standing around with the smoke,[0:12:57] they look like a couple of detectives in the show justified.[0:13:02] And they're about as serious as a couple of detectives. You know,[0:13:05] those types of detectives that go, you know,[0:13:07] they have their own day where they go do whatever they want and they just[0:13:11] interview people all day and knock on doors. You know,[0:13:15] the life of a detective, I'm telling you, not so bad. You get your,[0:13:18] you get to do whatever you want. You could wake up whenever you want it.[0:13:22] You go in your car, you go door to door. Guys, you a couple of questions.[0:13:27] It's pretty cool. I mean, you could run errands on being a detective.[0:13:31] You could do whatever you want.[0:13:33] So this guy messages me and he scares me because you have this new season of[0:13:38] barbecue showdowns out there. And, uh, I guess they talked to Melissa.[0:13:43] They told her she's gotta be nicer. You know, she was the mean,[0:13:46] cruel judge on the last show. And I turned in Melissa.[0:13:51] Hey, nice, sir. She's worse. She's worse, which is good.[0:13:56] That's what you want. You don't want her to be nice. What do you, Ethan Klein,[0:14:00] Hassan. They want everyone to be nice. Not here.[0:14:04] We just finished watching Brian Holtzman's special.[0:14:07] Boo. Boo. Boo. Boo.[0:14:12] Is he retarded? Just kidding. I love him.[0:14:17] Brian Holtzman, a new special just came out. You know,[0:14:20] he's a comic from, uh, the comedy store. I don't know. He's a little,[0:14:24] uh, he's a little messed up now.[0:14:27] It almost sounds like he's got Parkinson's or Tourette's now.[0:14:31] He couldn't really, he was like that guy from kill Tony,[0:14:36] the new tard and kill Tony. Have you seen this guy?[0:14:40] The new fat tard with the little glasses, the little eyes.[0:14:43] And he goes.[0:14:48] I love shoot him.[0:14:52] I know, but he's, you know, you don't want people to think you're retarded.[0:14:56] You know, there's this new Netflix show, uh, with another retard.[0:15:00] What's this comedy show that you're making me watch here. Four legs only.[0:15:04] Thanks for the legs. What is it called? It's on Netflix.[0:15:08] The guy who I ask every day, Jules,[0:15:10] is he retarded for legs?[0:15:13] Don't worry about those guesses. It's the guy,[0:15:18] the only comedy show on Netflix that we're watching right now.[0:15:21] I think you should leave. I think you should leave.[0:15:26] Do you understand? Four legs only. I think you should leave. Have you seen this?[0:15:30] What's it called? I think you should leave. Yes. Yes, of course. Okay.[0:15:34] The guy, every scene, he just acts completely retarded.[0:15:39] It's like, that's the only way to be funny now by acting like a complete re,[0:15:44] you know, he's almost just doing a retard. Every sketch is about,[0:15:48] wouldn't it be cool if there was a retarded guy in a boardroom screaming,[0:15:52] wouldn't it be cool if there was a retarded guy at a party and he messes it all[0:15:57] up. And it's just the same thing. Every time there's gotta be another way.[0:16:02] And I'm here to show you how that way is done. Thank you.[0:16:06] Let's do some non-retarded comedy. That whole kill Tony show is retard,[0:16:10] retard, screaming, retard studying. And they love it.[0:16:14] The more special needs a person is the more they that's really[0:16:18] good. He's deaf, but he made some sort of a joke.[0:16:22] Not so much retired comedy,[0:16:24] but yelling comedy does work on me.[0:16:27] I do yelling comedy. My yelling comedy doesn't come up.[0:16:32] People don't tune in and go, is he retarded? Is he special needs?[0:16:35] That's why I do my hair like this.[0:16:37] There's too many geeks doing comedy like[0:16:41] Jeremiah. Wait,[0:16:45] do you see what he posted? You know,[0:16:49] I probably wouldn't even be here today unless that post woke me out of[0:16:54] bed. Was that yesterday that he posted the thing about his new baby?[0:16:58] Jeremiah wonders. You don't seem to really have any information about all[0:17:03] my questions. What's the point of asking her a damn thing.[0:17:08] I might as well start doing super chats to get my questions answered around here.[0:17:11] Cause she doesn't know what the hell I'm talking about. She does. She does.[0:17:16] She's warming up. We're all a bit rusty from our five day[0:17:22] setback. We didn't take those summer off. We had a five day setback.[0:17:26] It was driving us crazy with worry. You know,[0:17:28] we just stupidly put out a post saying, we'll see you next week.[0:17:33] You don't want to tell people when you're ever seeing them again,[0:17:36] they will hold you. And by them next week means, okay,[0:17:39] if this was posted Wednesday, then it means exactly on Wednesday.[0:17:42] That is a next week to me. Next week means here's Wednesday.[0:17:46] You definitely won't be till after the next Wednesday.[0:17:49] And then that's next week and beyond is next week.[0:17:54] You understand to me? If I go, I'll see you next week.[0:17:57] That could be starting anywhere from next week to the next year.[0:18:02] As long as it's after next week, I've kept my promise.[0:18:05] Well, get this. When Mike first made that post about season 21,[0:18:09] he wrote season 21 coming immediately.[0:18:14] Immediately meaning there'll be no wait. To me, that's no wait.[0:18:19] You know, Curb Your Enthusiasm, they take eight years between seasons.[0:18:24] So I said, you better tune to that to next week because immediately means like[0:18:28] in five minutes.[0:18:29] I blame all these other shows,[0:18:30] all these other shows who just come on here and live for super chats and they[0:18:34] just say whatever they please, you know, there's no thought behind them.[0:18:38] And they're on every day. So you think, Oh, this should be done daily. No,[0:18:43] no, no, no. Uh, but everybody was very patient. Everyone's very nice.[0:18:48] There was only two commenters and they were still very nice. And no,[0:18:53] but I'm telling you this eats us alive. We sit there. This is me.[0:18:58] What are we going to do? This is me on day two of being sick.[0:19:01] What are we going to do? What are we going to do? Do we tell them?[0:19:04] Do we put out a thing saying he said, listen,[0:19:06] if I put out a thing saying I'm sick, it would be every other day.[0:19:11] A post I'm sick. I'm sick. I'm sick. I'm sick. You start to think I was a bitch.[0:19:17] I don't think that anyone is ever really mad at us.[0:19:20] We're just triggered from our, I didn't say that. You're off. I didn't say that.[0:19:24] I just said,[0:19:25] they need to know that this is all that matters to us.[0:19:31] I mean, look around,[0:19:31] I've dumped my children's college fund into the studio.[0:19:37] Okay. Everybody else just gets a little stream deck.[0:19:40] Maybe they've invested $35 into their show. Okay.[0:19:45] You wouldn't believe more than gas digital is invested in their entire network.[0:19:48] We have invested in just this desk area.[0:19:51] You don't have to get so jealous. Why are you so jealous of us,[0:19:56] Kevin? That guy does like one show a year.[0:20:02] This guy does like one must be nice. When someone says must be nice.[0:20:06] They want to be you.[0:20:09] You can take two weeks off too if you want, by the way.[0:20:13] No, he can't because he needs the money. See these guys,[0:20:17] the only reason they're there streaming is because it's a cash day[0:20:22] because that means you could get super chats. That means donations.[0:20:27] So it's very motivating for these people who make very little money to wake up[0:20:33] and go, Oh my God, I got the opportunity to make $200 today. I better,[0:20:38] I better get up there and start calling with my friends. But everybody's happy.[0:20:43] Everybody's having a great time.[0:20:45] Let's take the focus off us and put it on our enemies.[0:20:50] Jeremiah Watkins, come on down.[0:20:54] You're going to be the first fool of season 21.[0:20:59] Jeremiah wonders. You remember this guy?[0:21:01] He used to be the saxophone player of the old kill Tony band.[0:21:05] I showed you him a few weeks ago,[0:21:08] reminding you what he did during the summer of Floyd. Remember that?[0:21:12] Black lives matter. Remember that?[0:21:18] He had a high hat on.[0:21:20] Never trust a guy in one of these high hats.[0:21:25] You know, Sam Tripoli is wearing them. Josh Denny's wearing them.[0:21:28] Burke. Chrysler is wearing them.[0:21:33] Is everything okay over there? Yeah.[0:21:35] I was actually just thinking you looked hot cause I'm a last cause jelly roll.[0:21:43] Uh, Burke Chrysler,[0:21:44] just saying his name makes me very happy because we've got some news about Burke[0:21:51] Chrysler. Okay. Let me, one thing at a time, too excited to say,[0:21:56] let's do a rise and then we'll get into Jeremiah wonders.[0:22:00] You're not going to believe what he's done. And this was the post.[0:22:05] This was the post that I read that goes, you can't be sick anymore.[0:22:08] It's time to get out of bed. It's time to fight. Okay.[0:22:13] It's time to do what it takes. Let's do a rise and we'll show you, uh,[0:22:18] Jeremiah, what he's done. The last time I showed you him on this show again,[0:22:22] remember he was on this screen and it was because he said black lives matter.[0:22:28] Here we go. We're doing a rise. Remember Jules,[0:22:30] you could go around the room with this one. Here you go. Rise, my friend.[0:22:35] Hit it.[0:22:38] Ooh, rise, rise, rise, rise.[0:22:43] Forgets.[0:22:47] She doesn't forget.[0:22:51] Let's look at this go a little faster. This month we upgraded the,[0:22:57] I put a new intake of the TV riser,[0:23:02] 15 degree horsepower boost. I put in there,[0:23:06] here it is. And I'll show you the post that got me out of bed.[0:23:09] Thank you to the bring back group member for posting this.[0:23:14] I know the bring back groups been getting along great lately.[0:23:19] The bring back group is where the Facebook guys go to get together and they've[0:23:24] been getting along great lately. I saw some guy in there, uh,[0:23:27] who was getting along great with people.[0:23:30] And so that's what they're doing in there. They're getting along great,[0:23:34] just like I want them to be.[0:23:36] They're getting along perfectly in there and nobody is judging each[0:23:41] other.[0:23:43] They're all treating each other like gold in there,[0:23:46] which is what I prefer in the bring back group.[0:23:49] They're not arguing about George Floyd.[0:23:54] There's not a bunch of guys in there saying, Oh yeah, well,[0:23:57] George Floyd was on fentanyl. And then a bunch of other guys going,[0:24:00] are you kidding me? A cop killed him.[0:24:02] I didn't see that in there at all. Cause they don't act like that in there.[0:24:06] They act perfect in there. They treat each other with respect.[0:24:10] They don't start bringing stupid Twitter arguments into the bring back group[0:24:14] because they're better than that.[0:24:17] Our audience has risen above the internet,[0:24:21] twit twatting, the twit twatting on the internet.[0:24:24] See I'm a little inspired by the Brian Holtzman stand up special.[0:24:29] I might start acting more like Holtzman this year, you know,[0:24:33] looking more like him. I've got the same. It doesn't matter how much I work out.[0:24:37] I got the, I got the upper body of a 90 year old man.[0:24:42] I'll tell you that you should see how old I got last week.[0:24:46] Jules said I looked at 90 the other day. That's what she said.[0:24:51] She goes, are you okay? You look 90.[0:24:54] It was more of the look in your eyes than your look.[0:24:58] Yeah. That's why I put on all this.[0:24:59] Because you were sick. So.[0:25:02] Or was I just goofing off? Maybe I was drugging. Maybe I was out partying.[0:25:07] All right. We've got to show you this. This is Jeremiah wonders.[0:25:12] And, uh, I, I love who posted this. You know, I,[0:25:15] I can't thank you enough for posting this. Let me find out where it is.[0:25:20] Did you put it up to the front or is this next up?[0:25:23] So Jeremiah wonders had a kid like last year, right?[0:25:28] Can we get some footage of kids? You get that black lives matter video again.[0:25:33] So I could show you who he is.[0:25:34] I think that's the one we should use every time we show him,[0:25:37] how does it feel Jeremiah to be the first enemy of the year,[0:25:42] the new season, 21 seasons. And I'm talking about you,[0:25:46] this little spineless,[0:25:49] spineless snake doesn't have the guts to acknowledge that he's been[0:25:53] brought up on this show several hundreds of times.[0:25:57] Remember when we watched you eat eggs on something's burning Jeremiah,[0:26:02] you gross Christian.[0:26:04] Ooh. And one hour ago, he posted the last riff, a crowd work doc.[0:26:09] The last riff.[0:26:11] You know, he does a show. I'm sure you've heard of this one from Joe Rogan.[0:26:15] He does a show in LA called stand up on the spot.[0:26:23] Stand up on the spot.[0:26:25] Have you seen your favorite comics? Take a stab at this.[0:26:27] Have you seen the big fat guy from, are you garbage?[0:26:34] I have to, I know this is mean to do. We have to show them Ethan's new tick.[0:26:40] So get that next, the, are you garbage guy? Oh,[0:26:45] that could have been me, but I watched my weight.[0:26:49] I cared about my health. I could have been the, are you garbage guy?[0:26:53] Great hair, fat body.[0:26:57] Imagine his bare naked tush hanging out that are you garbage guy.[0:27:02] And then that balding sickly,[0:27:05] are you a cycle guy? He's horrible.[0:27:10] They've done stand up on the spot Jeremiah's little show and what stand up on[0:27:15] the spot is it's an improv game.[0:27:18] You know, Joe Rogan has lifted this. So yeah. Okay. Listen,[0:27:22] Jeremiah Watkins has a show called stand up at the spot.[0:27:25] And this is at the comedy store. This is where a comic gets on stage.[0:27:29] One of your favorites, Tim Dylan, Louis J,[0:27:36] one of your favorites gets on stage.[0:27:37] And then the audience yells out a suggestion[0:27:43] and then the comic. So y'all sent me out jewels. I'll be the come.[0:27:46] Anyone got any suggestions, suggestions?[0:27:49] HBO is the idol.[0:27:51] The idol. Okay. Oh, I got this. So, uh,[0:27:55] anybody here,[0:27:58] hate people that are idols and it's like,[0:28:02] wow. Bravo.[0:28:05] And then the audience is even going,[0:28:08] see, they're going to do any material or is it all just them riffing,[0:28:13] which we despise here. Remember somebody riffing.[0:28:17] That's something to despise. That's it. Very hard to watch.[0:28:21] You don't want to see an adult riff. We don't riff here. None of this is riffing.[0:28:27] So I don't like riffing. I don't like a improv.[0:28:31] I don't like an improv game that you learned at class.[0:28:35] And here's an upgraded version for this day.[0:28:37] And to have Jeremiah host this with that[0:28:42] $3,000 smile, he gets up there and he goes,[0:28:46] he really sashays around. He's a real fake person. Jules Jeremiah.[0:28:52] Let's show that little video again. Start hating this guy, guys,[0:28:56] start hating him with me. I'm telling you, you will feel so much better.[0:29:00] Take it from me. If you're ever feeling down, if you're ever feeling low,[0:29:04] if you're ever having a bad day,[0:29:05] focus in on somebody and hate their guts.[0:29:09] You will feel incredible. This is normal. This is what you should be doing.[0:29:14] Here he is. Wait till you see this. And you've seen him.[0:29:18] That's the thing. You've already seen him. Here he is.[0:29:24] Kill that music.[0:29:29] We're just, so here he is. Here's Jeremiah Watkins.[0:29:32] And this was the summer of Floyd. I already showed you this.[0:29:35] I'll show you again.[0:29:36] And they were taking in this beautiful, powerful,[0:29:40] peaceful protest. And they had to take in the sign.[0:29:45] He's being serious. This isn't a gag like me.[0:29:49] And that made me sad that that's not an obvious thing that we're having[0:29:54] to teach our kids this. How is it not?[0:29:59] Of course, of course, that's what it is. Let them speak. We can do better.[0:30:04] I know we can. And I just want to say, as black people,[0:30:07] I stand with the black community. I love you. And I support you.[0:30:13] Here it is. This is the opening. Do I have your attention? Listen,[0:30:16] black lives matter.[0:30:21] I mean, is that enough to hate him for life?[0:30:24] You can't come back from that until today.[0:30:28] He did something worse. He did something worse.[0:30:32] 2020 was a crazy time.[0:30:35] No, it wasn't. These guys were just acting completely psychotic.[0:30:38] There was nothing. You didn't see me do that.[0:30:41] Did you see that the biggest star of 2020, Hannah Gadsby,[0:30:44] everybody's turned on her.[0:30:46] I heard Hannah Gadsby and believe me comics.[0:30:49] They took the easy way out and they made fun of my pal.[0:30:54] Remember I used to, when this Nanette came out,[0:30:57] I used to go to lunches with her where we'd talk about how much better we[0:31:02] were than everybody else. How people don't get us,[0:31:07] how we're better.[0:31:09] And we'd roll our eyes and laugh as we spent so much[0:31:14] money on all this stuff, biscuits and all this crap.[0:31:19] And now I guess she's being laughed out of town. So the comics were right.[0:31:22] This is not comedy. The men said, I don't believe that.[0:31:26] I think her special was great Nanette. And, uh, but people,[0:31:31] it was, Oh, this isn't comedy. I don't think you watch the name.[0:31:36] Oh, I watched it.[0:31:39] And, uh, I just,[0:31:41] I can't get on board with something everybody's doing.[0:31:44] And if you're all going to hate Nanette,[0:31:45] then I'm going to be the person to like her. Sorry. So here he is.[0:31:49] This is Jeremiah Watkins and he's a, a trier.[0:31:53] I mean, he's doing it all every day. He's posting a thousand little clips,[0:31:58] uh, trying a million different. Let's,[0:32:01] let's watch a little bit of a stand up here. Let's see what he says.[0:32:06] Come on, Jerry. Come on. Hit it. Hit it boy.[0:32:11] Okay. Here he is. Look at,[0:32:12] and look how he mugs out there muting me a game with rap. You know what I mean?[0:32:17] My story. I've only had one woman, right?[0:32:20] He's doing my voice. Look at that hair.[0:32:24] Of rap music.[0:32:32] Every day. It's a clip like this every day.[0:32:35] So don't you even dare to compare to her. One girl for life every day, every night.[0:32:40] She's my blue sky and I'm a kite. She can do no wrong.[0:32:42] Only right love a girl too much. My only play. That's one kitty for eternity.[0:32:46] Now, are you allowed to kill somebody's baby?[0:32:49] Depends if they are about to attack you in a self-defense.[0:32:54] I just watched John wick for last night.[0:32:58] And uh, I'm in the spirit.[0:33:01] I'm in the spirit of all that stuff that he did. John wick for,[0:33:05] of course with me to cockoo. Okay. Did you see me to cockoo?[0:33:09] The blind guy. Do I understand why you all like John wick?[0:33:14] Nope.[0:33:16] It must be the tube lights that they set up behind every scene to make it look[0:33:20] like a neon wonderland. Huh? Everything's a neon place. By the way,[0:33:27] there is no difference between John wick for and[0:33:32] La machine.[0:33:37] Nobody has a better,[0:33:39] the machine review than us coming up today.[0:33:45] You guys are in store for an actually great episode.[0:33:49] Now that I think of it,[0:33:54] you're so fucked. All right. So here's this guy. Everybody knows Jerry, right?[0:33:59] You know, we got a lot of new, um,[0:34:01] supporters this year for our show jewels.[0:34:04] Sometimes maybe they missed who this guy is. You know, maybe matter.[0:34:09] You got to stop talking. I've clicked on your thing there. You know,[0:34:13] sometimes people miss these guys. Jewels.[0:34:16] Let's say we've got a hundred new supporters since the last season.[0:34:20] They might not know him.[0:34:21] They might've tuned in because they see us make fun of a big Mike,[0:34:26] right? So maybe they don't know Jeremiah.[0:34:29] You got to give people a little backstory, a little intro.[0:34:32] I think people appreciate that about,[0:34:36] about a red bar and how we do this. So you've seen this guy, right?[0:34:40] He's trying to bulk up.[0:34:41] Can you give me any advice?[0:34:43] Look at that hair. Look at that hair bulk up a little bit.[0:34:49] Any suggestions for me? Wait,[0:34:54] you're like, he's too far gone.[0:34:56] You see this million dollars smile that he tries to pull off.[0:35:02] Look at this disgusting haircut. Ooh. Can we see that?[0:35:07] Why does, why does he make it like that? Why does it,[0:35:12] why does it gotta be a combed? You know, that's not the right hairstyle.[0:35:17] That's not the right product for this hairstyle.[0:35:20] He's using like a hard wax, but to do a long,[0:35:23] you should do your hair like that next week, just to see if you can do my nose.[0:35:27] Like that. And you see this bullshit smile he's got on his face.[0:35:31] Wait till you hear what I caught him doing.[0:35:34] That the listener in the bring back group caught him doing that. I,[0:35:39] and I'll tell you,[0:35:40] it was so bad jewels that I replied in the comment[0:35:44] thread. What I'm about to show you that he did was so bad.[0:35:50] I've never replied with this in my life.[0:35:52] It was the cutest reply I've ever done. I wrote what the fucking fuck.[0:35:59] That's what I'm about to show you. You're going to go, what the fucking fuck?[0:36:04] It's that bad. So let's see if we could catch it here.[0:36:09] He's had another new kid.[0:36:12] He's got no business having kids. Is this his second kid?[0:36:16] This is his second son.[0:36:18] Second sense of this guy is one of these guys. He's doing six shows a night.[0:36:23] He's doing a million Instagram things a day. He's all,[0:36:27] or he's trying to be,[0:36:28] he tries to situate himself into everyone else's business.[0:36:32] You know, now that asked, he should have moved to Austin.[0:36:36] I think that was a big mistake for him. He stayed back.[0:36:39] He was in the old kill Tony band.[0:36:41] Now the new kill Tony audience doesn't even know who he is anymore.[0:36:45] They brought back the old band a few months ago.[0:36:48] The new crowd didn't know the old band. They don't even know him.[0:36:54] So all the old jokes, they, they meant nothing.[0:36:57] I wonder if they regret not moving. I'm curious.[0:37:01] Let's uh, before I show you what he's done here, let me, uh,[0:37:06] just check out this chilling here with the boys watching Spiderman.[0:37:11] So here's the old baby. And remember, he's posting these beautiful boys,[0:37:16] by the way,[0:37:22] I love other people's sons.[0:37:27] I'm a big Phoenix sons fan.[0:37:31] Red bar sons is our team.[0:37:35] We love other people's boys.[0:37:41] That's it. Can I bring, can I see your kid's neck?[0:37:46] Imagine that Jeremiah,[0:37:49] imagine that on this one.[0:37:55] Why as Jeremiah, would you post like if you're in the comedy community,[0:37:58] I just don't,[0:38:00] I never understand how people post these kids.[0:38:04] He's got no business having no kids. You know, I always say,[0:38:07] if you don't have any money, having kids is child abuse to the kid.[0:38:13] Here's the new one. And remember,[0:38:15] this guy's never been with his girl in his whole life. He was afraid.[0:38:18] Remember that story. Brian red band told me, he said, dude,[0:38:22] Jeremiah is so weird.[0:38:24] We brought him to the strip club and he had like a total freak out and he put[0:38:28] his head down and ran towards the door and left. And he went like this.[0:38:34] He said that he was having like a polygamist freak out or not polygamous,[0:38:39] like a Puritan freak out. He was so scared of the women.[0:38:44] And then all of a sudden he finds this psycho.[0:38:47] They get married and they start pumping out kids immediately.[0:38:52] He had no business being a fi I mean,[0:38:54] he hasn't even figured out his own shtick yet.[0:38:57] He doesn't even know what his voice is on stage.[0:39:00] If you don't know your voice on stage, you can't be having a kid.[0:39:04] You at least got to know your persona.[0:39:08] I'm ready to have a child.[0:39:11] I'm ready to have a lot of kids.[0:39:16] You know, these assholes who go, Mike, you should have a kid. You should be. Oh,[0:39:18] yeah. Would you like red bar every once every 71 days?[0:39:22] Cause that's what it would be. Cause if you have a kid,[0:39:26] you drop everything.[0:39:27] And now you have to train the kid to be the best person in the[0:39:32] world. If you don't have the patience for that,[0:39:35] then you don't have what it takes to make a kid.[0:39:38] Don't make a kid unless you plan them. It's like, don't open a restaurant.[0:39:42] Unless it's the best pizza in town.[0:39:45] Don't open up a hot dog place.[0:39:47] If it's the seventh worst hot dog place on the block, but they do.[0:39:53] They do shy. Say that for kids.[0:39:55] If your kid's not going to be one of the best kids, what's the point.[0:40:00] Just to flood the market, just to get some presents.[0:40:03] You were bored of your little life,[0:40:04] not enough people celebrating you and you wanted a presence thing that will make[0:40:09] you whole. That's what they think. They sit around. They're so bored and lonely.[0:40:14] And then they go, what can I do? I bet if I had kids, I'd be like, come on,[0:40:19] the world would rule. And then they pretend that it rules.[0:40:22] Now you would never understand. I've had kids, trust me,[0:40:26] gave them back. It was so boring. And again,[0:40:30] if I have a kid that I'm done with my life, and now I am like a sensei,[0:40:36] I'm like master splinter, right? That's[0:40:40] and then you teach the kids and then every day would be working on this kid and[0:40:44] making,[0:40:44] and I'd be going nuts because I can't let my kid[0:40:49] go to school.[0:40:51] I can't let my kid do all this stuff. I can't let my kid go to,[0:40:54] we're Jewish kid's house. You know, like me, I grew up,[0:40:59] my parents made me play with an Indian kid[0:41:04] named Sashin. Sashin. It could have been Satchin,[0:41:09] but I called him Sashin. His house smelled like Tang.[0:41:15] I'd go like this, mama, mama, pick me up, pick me up. This kid stinks.[0:41:20] And they'd be like, Oh, he doesn't like it. They made Tang sandwiches for us.[0:41:25] Remember going to your friend's house as a kid and eating dinner with your[0:41:30] family?[0:41:31] Is there anything worse than eating the disgusting food somebody else's[0:41:36] parents made?[0:41:37] Like sure your parents food is whatever.[0:41:39] Their salads.[0:41:40] But a stranger's parent or not a stranger, just someone else's parents food.[0:41:44] Yes. They don't know how to cook. No, no, no. I go, are your, Oh,[0:41:47] your parents are chefs. They go, no. I go, well,[0:41:50] why are they making dinner though? Oh,[0:41:53] your parents are world star chefs. No. Oh, well, what do they do for a living?[0:41:58] Well, my mom works at Target and my dad is a lawyer. Jewish.[0:42:04] Then why are they making dinner?[0:42:06] Even if your friend's dad like brought home Subway or something,[0:42:10] it was still like off.[0:42:12] It was off because they did it a different way. Yes. Yes.[0:42:16] Even if you went to McDonald's with a friend's dad,[0:42:20] he would do McDonald's. Not the way you're used to.[0:42:24] It would be off. That's a great metaphor for my entire life.[0:42:29] Everybody besides me is off. Do you feel this way at home? I'm here.[0:42:34] I'm your Messiah to lead you into that feeling. That's why I'm here.[0:42:39] And you're right. Lean into that. They're all off.[0:42:43] Most people are off. Not us.[0:42:46] I had this one friend that I went over to.[0:42:49] LOL. Yes. They're saying takeout was still weird. That's from Jules.[0:42:53] Pretty good for a girl through a Jew.[0:42:57] Go on, Joel.[0:42:57] I went to this kid's house all the time and his mom would make just different[0:43:03] versions of things in like, you know,[0:43:05] those spinach and tomato colored wraps. Like, you know,[0:43:08] when you would get that, I don't know what to call it other than a wrap.[0:43:12] A spinach wrap. Yeah. A large tortilla with speckles. And that's fine.[0:43:16] Whatever. Delicious wrap. Okay. The way that she... Was it cold? Yes.[0:43:21] She always had these wraps and every time you'd have the dinner,[0:43:24] it was something in the wrap and I would go over there and I'd be like,[0:43:27] the wrap again. There's no flavor. It's so dry. It's so cold.[0:43:31] All I'm tasting is freezing cold ingredients.[0:43:34] And every time I see one of those to this day, I'm like...[0:43:37] Like it could be bologna and cheese ice cold, or it could be like lettuce,[0:43:40] tomato, onion, and Turkey all cold. It's going to taste the same.[0:43:45] Every day they had that for dinner. No change.[0:43:47] I used to go over to this kid's house. His dad would make burgers, right?[0:43:53] They would be these. Nope.[0:43:54] He'd baste them with barbecue sauce while he was cooking them.[0:44:00] No, thank you.[0:44:03] Hell no.[0:44:04] You got to sit. If you go to someone's house,[0:44:06] the safest best bet is to look into their long pantry.[0:44:10] If they don't have a long pantry, get out. That's not a real kid.[0:44:13] You got to have a long pantry next to the fridge that opens like this. Okay.[0:44:17] It's a long door, long, skinny door.[0:44:20] If they just have upper cabinets for a pantry, that's...[0:44:24] No, no.[0:44:25] All you're going to find in there is the mom's Salem's.[0:44:30] So, uh, your best bet at a kid's house,[0:44:34] if you're ever eating dinner at a kid's house,[0:44:36] just see if they've got little Debbie hostess and little Debbie snacks,[0:44:42] uh, Swiss rolls. That's your best bet. Couple roll-ups, couple Swiss rolls,[0:44:47] rain check on the main entry.[0:44:50] What you want when you're at your friend's house is to be in the fully stocked[0:44:54] kid's playground basement with like 50 TVs and tons of snacks.[0:44:58] And then the mom calls down, you want some dinner?[0:45:00] And then your friend goes, no mom. And then you don't.[0:45:04] Yup.[0:45:05] And that concludes our version of snacks.[0:45:09] Bet. Thank you. All right. Jeremiah wonders.[0:45:13] He's chilling with the boys. I was kidding about kissing the boys.[0:45:16] I know a lot of people are up in arms about saving the kids. You know,[0:45:21] you should have seen what I did to target. I do.[0:45:23] I kicked over this whole, uh, stand at target.[0:45:28] I went into target. I went crazy. I saw red and I started,[0:45:32] do you see what I did to target? It was on the news.[0:45:34] I went in there and I go, what the fuck is this home?[0:45:38] And I broke a cardboard cutout over my knee. They go, sir, you got to leave.[0:45:43] I fucking hate target. You know what target is? They're targeting kids.[0:45:50] Did you hear about this? So I'm just kidding. When I said,[0:45:56] to some kid that I'm actually looking at here, but at target,[0:46:00] they're not kidding. They're coming for those kids. We need to burn down[0:46:07] the idea of targeting kids. You see this? Okay.[0:46:11] Let's just watch his video one more time.[0:46:13] And then I'll tell you what Jeremiah wonders did that got me so perturbed.[0:46:18] And this is going to make us feel better.[0:46:21] You guys ready to feel amazing today based on other people's[0:46:26] pain. Watch here with the boys.[0:46:30] Watching Spider-Man,[0:46:31] but what you should be watching tonight is my new crowd work doc that I just[0:46:36] called the last riff. Check it out on my YouTube. Now it's a lot of fun.[0:46:41] Chilling here with the book.[0:46:42] If my dad made a tic-tac during my pregnancy,[0:46:47] it'd be over. No promos. When you're with your son, no promo Kanye West,[0:46:53] Kanye West. Wasn't out there doing Danda. When the kids were born,[0:46:57] he was holding the kids with a giant smile and a giant chain like me.[0:47:03] So Jeremiah, this is what got me out of bed. Thank you for posting this.[0:47:07] This is what made me go enough being sick.[0:47:11] It's time to get back to work. Okay. Enough with this Jewish bullshit.[0:47:18] And it was this way to see this. You're going to fucking die.[0:47:20] I could read this all day. If this was all we were showing you on the show today,[0:47:24] I could die a happy man.[0:47:27] Is it going to open for me? Hands. Okay. Watch this.[0:47:31] And maybe we could see who posted this note by cut them out. Okay.[0:47:35] Here's Jeremiah's posting these wonderful pictures of this new cretin that he's[0:47:38] made. New baby. Okay.[0:47:42] No business having to, this looks like Dave Gibson Tappan Skins family.[0:47:46] For God's sakes. Hey, it's happened. Skins families tonight. Tappan Skins.[0:47:51] You got enough money for those kids. Anybody out there, by the way,[0:47:54] if you have two kids and they're not rich, come see me.[0:47:57] I want to give your kids some money. Let's give someone's kid Tappan Skins family.[0:48:01] How about this? I want to have a kid. Whenever I see him on his story,[0:48:04] they're out there having a freaking blast. Let me say.[0:48:08] I got a new contest idea called the Godfather.[0:48:14] Let me in trade for a nice[0:48:19] amount of money to get these kids up to speed.[0:48:22] I am the legal Godfather of one listener's child[0:48:28] who's in,[0:48:31] I'm talking about 1000 to $3,000.[0:48:36] And that gives me access to Godfather to one of your kids. And I kid[0:48:42] privately speak with them. If I need, I can pick them up 3000.[0:48:47] I could do stuff like that to believe me. A lot of these kids need, well,[0:48:51] there's a lot of people up there. $3,000. They could,[0:48:55] you can't even go to Disney world for 3000 anymore for four days.[0:49:00] I was watching a Disney world tour the other day, balling my eyes out,[0:49:05] balling, thinking about how fun it would be to be at Disney world right now,[0:49:10] even the humidity of Orlando makes me ball.[0:49:17] Anyway, look at this. So Jeremiah has another kid. Okay.[0:49:19] That's not the disgusting part to you. Probably to me,[0:49:23] that's bad enough.[0:49:26] A fool like this having two kids should be bad.[0:49:29] You should look at that as child abuse, but no, the world goes congrats, right?[0:49:34] Congrats. Congrats. Congrats. Celebrate them.[0:49:38] And this is why people have kids. People sit around and they go,[0:49:40] how could I get celebrated? How could I fit in?[0:49:45] How could I feel wonderful? Well, I'll have these kids. You get married.[0:49:49] That party's over, right? Then you have kids.[0:49:53] Now you can get have another party. People are like invested.[0:49:56] They're making sure you got money, right?[0:49:58] It's a nice way to make sure people are giving you money.[0:50:03] You know, it's a nice way. If you're really scared of life,[0:50:06] you have a couple of kids and that will really,[0:50:08] that'll make sure everything's fine. I can't tell you how goofy this is[0:50:14] to have these kids, you know,[0:50:17] especially in Dr. Peterson's America.[0:50:22] With all these people trying to rape your kids at every turn,[0:50:24] you can't even shop. Where are you going to shop with a kid?[0:50:27] Bring them to target. He's going to end up like Dolly. Pardon.[0:50:33] Shaken around. I'll have two massive tits. By the time he's four,[0:50:36] you take them to target. So look at this.[0:50:39] This is what's going to drive you wild.[0:50:40] And this is what took me about an hour to get comfortable enough to cover.[0:50:45] Listen to this.[0:50:47] My new son is here. Whitaker,[0:50:50] Zach Watkin, eight pounds,[0:50:54] 13 ounces. That's nothing. So he's a mealy baby.[0:50:59] What do they call that? A preemie. A lot of people think I was born a preemie.[0:51:04] You're wrong. You're wrong. I don't know. Eight pounds is nothing.[0:51:08] You should see eight pounds. I'm doing a lateral raises with 10.[0:51:13] I'm up to 10 pounds on lateral raises.[0:51:17] Everybody knows how complicated that could be. So eight pounds is nothing.[0:51:21] I could take two of his babies and do this. No problem. Four sets of 12,[0:51:26] no problem. Using my shoulders. You know,[0:51:29] I'm not using the forearms to bring that up. I'm activating these things.[0:51:34] So I'll grab two of his babies by the neck. I'll use the pinky.[0:51:37] Have you ever used the pinky method on these lateral raises? You ever do this?[0:51:43] Here, get a, get a straight in there. You hold the babies with your pinky.[0:51:53] Somebody edit that in. His two kids like that. They're only eight pounds.[0:51:59] My new son is here. Whitaker, Zach Watkins.[0:52:04] And you're telling everybody your son's full name birthday.[0:52:07] Why don't you post his social security?[0:52:09] Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Want to sign my son up for a gap card?[0:52:12] Come on.[0:52:15] Eight pounds, 13 ounces born June 2nd. And I'll tell you why it's TMI.[0:52:18] I'll tell you why people share because I needed a money.[0:52:23] Now don't read along. I'm, I'm guessing you guys are like me.[0:52:27] You can't read. So don't read along. Look at this.[0:52:32] Born June 2nd, 10 30 PM.[0:52:36] That's when the tonight show starts in, uh, Illinois.[0:52:40] That baby is up past his head. Imagine you're born the tonight show.[0:52:46] And then your baby gets born. That's like, he's born to be a star.[0:52:51] Just like you is born right during the monologue.[0:52:55] 10 30 PM. June 2nd. Look at this.[0:52:59] I got to calm down. Cause this is the best thing I've ever seen.[0:53:02] Hopefully you audio listeners are on the edge of your seats. Listen to this.[0:53:07] And I'm sorry. I know this is being annoying, being annoying.[0:53:10] Okay.[0:53:15] A lot of my friends have said,[0:53:17] let me know if I can do anything when the baby comes.[0:53:22] If you send food or drop it off,[0:53:26] that's the best thing you can do.[0:53:30] If you want to send money for Uber eats slash[0:53:34] door dash, that's awesome too.[0:53:37] I don't care if this comes off as tacky.[0:53:42] I'm exhausted and I'm in charge of meal prep for[0:53:47] my family. An emoji like this.[0:53:53] Thanks for the love and positivity.[0:53:57] Tommy NC 2010 everybody.[0:54:01] So are we up to speed on what's going on here? He has a kid.[0:54:05] He's begging for free food.[0:54:09] This will not stand. This will not last.[0:54:14] Only in charge of meal prep for the family.[0:54:16] Can you make a nice meal for your new son meal prep? That's what he said.[0:54:21] It should not be called meal prep.[0:54:26] I'm in charge of meal. I would hope so.[0:54:29] I would hope somebody is doing food for the family. See,[0:54:33] he thinks of it as like a little event, like stand up on the spot. Oh,[0:54:36] should there be food? I'm in charge of the food.[0:54:40] Is this not blowing your mind? And it doesn't end here. This wasn't a one-off,[0:54:45] but let me read you that again. Look at this. A lot of people say,[0:54:49] is there anything that you do when the baby comes?[0:54:51] If you send food or drop it off,[0:54:54] that's the best thing you could do.[0:54:57] If you want to send money for Uber eats slash door dash, that's awesome too.[0:55:01] I don't care if this comes off tacky.[0:55:04] I'm exhausted and I'm in charge of meal prep for the family.[0:55:10] Thanks for the love and positivity.[0:55:11] Now I'm going through the comments here and everyone's just going, congrats,[0:55:14] congrats, congrats. I go, he don't want congrats.[0:55:18] You think he's reading? Congrats. Congrats. Every congrats you see,[0:55:21] he's pissed. He's looking for Venmo idiots.[0:55:26] He doesn't want congrats. He wants here's cash.[0:55:31] He has a thing set up like when I always check to see if people are scars[0:55:36] before letting them into the BBG. Cause it's the only system I have.[0:55:41] Jeremiah has a setup like I do checking the scars, usernames, et cetera.[0:55:45] To see if people have donated to his, what can I do?[0:55:49] What can we do with this here?[0:55:52] And this went across all platforms multiple times.[0:55:56] Here's another post from his Instagram stories, I believe.[0:56:00] And this is so manipulative. Yes. Wait till you see this.[0:56:04] This is so manipulative.[0:56:06] He posts a picture of rich crackers with is,[0:56:13] what is that salmon on it? It's like salmon, little pieces of salmon.[0:56:17] So it's a plate of rich crack,[0:56:20] rich crackers with a little piece of smoked salmon on it. And he goes,[0:56:25] I don't know how to cook.[0:56:27] This is what I made for us for breakfast.[0:56:31] Haha. Dying.[0:56:33] Well, you need to know how to cook. If you have a kid.[0:56:35] This is what I mean. I just can't believe. Why would you have a kid?[0:56:38] So what you're trying to do is say, look, I'm about to feed the kid.[0:56:42] Crap. Better send the money or the kid gets this.[0:56:47] The new baby. He gets, I don't know what a baby eats,[0:56:51] rich crackers and salmon. That salmon is going to kill your baby. Believe me,[0:56:55] there are parasites in raw salmon. You can't give it to a baby.[0:57:00] People don't know that they think sushi is for everybody.[0:57:03] You can't give sushi to a baby.[0:57:07] Most sushi has parasites in it.[0:57:10] What happens if they, when there's another pandemic?[0:57:12] He's threatening the life of his kid.[0:57:14] The power grid goes out and you can't order and there's no restaurants.[0:57:17] How are you going to feed your kid?[0:57:18] Look at this. So the first slide is this. I don't know how to cook.[0:57:23] This is what I made for us for breakfast. Haha. Gino, Gino, Gino face.[0:57:29] If you want to send money for Uber Eats, store dash, that's awesome too.[0:57:35] Venmo, Jeremiah Watkins, cash app. How much money am I donating today?[0:57:40] Hey, you got to give some, let's give him 3000 bucks[0:57:45] to scare him. Give him like,[0:57:50] that's too much of our money. Whatever you want.[0:57:52] What do you guys think would be a good at effort? I want to skip 2000 bucks.[0:57:56] Give like him like $200,[0:57:58] but no that's cheap. You want the baby to eat white pizza with[0:58:03] anchovies. Nor how about like, here's $2,000,[0:58:08] but you need to photograph your baby eating every one of the meals and show[0:58:13] receipts to me of every one of the meals that you get. And I get like,[0:58:17] I need perks for the donation.[0:58:20] I need Patreon level perks of[0:58:24] insider footage of your kid in the high chair,[0:58:28] smashing the salmon with his paws. Look at this. He says,[0:58:33] I also don't care if this comes off tacky.[0:58:37] So he's doing this on off. He's writing this. Like I'm writing red bar,[0:58:41] new episode available. Now he's doing this.[0:58:44] I'm in charge of meal prep for my family.[0:58:47] And this is a whole different post here in what's this what's huh.[0:58:52] It's like throw every emoji on there. That way they'll,[0:58:56] whatever they think this is, it'll be something for them.[0:59:01] Someone says, I'm livid.[0:59:02] Didn't this guy brag on Bert's show that he was a great cook and then made[0:59:06] crappy eggs. Yes. So he's lying about being a bad cook.[0:59:11] He's manipulating people. And how, if you do,[0:59:16] don't you dare give him a dollar.[0:59:18] This should be reported to DCFS, the child custody guys.[0:59:24] I learned that term DCFS very quickly. When I was a kid,[0:59:28] I would threaten my parents with that every day. You got to do your homework.[0:59:32] Do you want me to call DCFS? I'll say anything.[0:59:36] You could do that now. So, so easily. Now you could scare your parents.[0:59:41] I wonder how many kids are like holding their parents hostage by just I'll tell[0:59:46] everybody you raped me on Twitter. It's up to you.[0:59:51] It's up to you. It's up to you. Jeremiah wonders everybody.[0:59:54] Was that not as incredible as I wasn't that just as incredible as I[0:59:59] promised that child sushi pick did shock me.[1:00:02] Oh, can people see this?[1:00:06] I'm Lisa from black.[1:00:10] Just going to say you're wearing the vision pro the vision pro,[1:00:14] which watch this. How many of you are like[1:00:20] anti Apple's vision pro? Don't even tell me.[1:00:26] So something happened with Apple vision pro,[1:00:29] which I'll tell you I'm buying as many of them as they'll allow me[1:00:34] to. This is Apple just new headset. It came out to,[1:00:38] they announced it yesterday.[1:00:40] This is how I wanted people to act when chat GPT came out,[1:00:45] but no, you all ran to the computer. Maybe cause it's free.[1:00:48] People like free. They don't like this $3,000 range.[1:00:53] It scares them. Even the Klein's even the Hassan's.[1:00:57] So I don't know. Are people up in arms?[1:00:59] Because I'll tell you who is up in arms and maybe do you want to be the same as[1:01:03] them? Here's a segment called, do you want to be like them?[1:01:08] I don't know what's going on, but I saw the Apple keynote.[1:01:12] I watched all four hours of it yesterday.[1:01:14] Which you should get paid for that.[1:01:16] We should get paid to watch a four hour Apple commercial.[1:01:20] At least you should get a hundred dollar gift card to the iTunes store.[1:01:24] And they act like they're doing us a favor. They're like,[1:01:26] here's TT Pacoco. And it's just a white woman.[1:01:31] It's like, they literally did this. They're like,[1:01:33] let's talk to N and see what's up. And I go, N,[1:01:38] and then it's just a white woman. Let's talk to Lili.[1:01:43] And then it's another weird, strict white woman.[1:01:48] It's like, why don't you have the same cast? Who are these people?[1:01:51] And why are you, why do they all have these funny names?[1:01:55] Why are they here? And did you see that big pride rainbow?[1:01:58] They had sticking it to the Michael Knowles of the world.[1:02:02] They're not afraid. So there was a war on pride this season, you know,[1:02:06] it's the pride parade.[1:02:13] So, you know, when the gay pride stuff first[1:02:18] started, I was like, well, this is discussing[1:02:25] it.[1:02:28] That's me at the pride parade, shooting out the tires, just the tires,[1:02:34] which is still allowed. So I was always like, yes,[1:02:38] I hate the pride parade.[1:02:39] I lived in Chicago and they actually have a whole boy's town in Chicago.[1:02:44] This made me really mad my entire life. It was in what area was that?[1:02:49] I don't even remember the areas in Chicago anymore.[1:02:51] That's a distant of a memory. It's become Halstead.[1:02:56] Boy's town. Where was that? Where was boy's town? By, by the Cubs,[1:03:00] Wrigley field.[1:03:01] To anaphylactic shock. So exactly. I hate that.[1:03:05] So they have like a three mile strip,[1:03:09] a very expensive, nice street called Halstead.[1:03:14] And what they've done is they put up every 10 feet is a giant[1:03:20] must be $50,000 pillar of the rainbow.[1:03:26] And the whole place is called boy's town.[1:03:29] And every place is a gay bar. And this is the gay neighborhood.[1:03:33] That drove me nuts. When I was a kid, you know, Scott hand on the Bible,[1:03:38] that drove me nuts.[1:03:39] I didn't know why the city was investing and you should see the pillars were the[1:03:44] problem. You want to nickname something boy's town, go ahead.[1:03:48] But the minute you start spending 50,000,[1:03:52] A pillar. And here's the thing. So three miles street,[1:03:56] there must've been $150,000 pillars.[1:04:00] Pull up these pillars, boy's town pillar, Chicago.[1:04:05] And I go, why is my tax money going to guys fucking each other up the aisle?[1:04:13] I couldn't believe that they were building.[1:04:15] There's nothing cool about representing a guy fucking a dude up the ass.[1:04:21] And that's what everybody's just realizing now.[1:04:27] And guess what?[1:04:31] It's wrong to do now.[1:04:35] This is bad timing.[1:04:37] The name of the segment we're in right now is, do you really want to be like them?[1:04:41] Wait, no, it's not. I didn't approve that name at all.[1:04:44] What you just invented it.[1:04:47] Do you really want to be like them? No,[1:04:50] that's not what I'm saying.[1:04:51] I'm saying $50,000 for these pillars was insane. You know,[1:04:56] and this is something, if you want to get together and protest, look at this,[1:04:59] these things, this could be more, this could be a hundred pop-ups.[1:05:05] We let them win, huh? So we're taking down target. Meanwhile,[1:05:08] everybody's doing eight pop-ups a site, eight pop-ups a site.[1:05:13] So this is what happens when you go to a site. Let me run you through it.[1:05:16] If you haven't visited a website currently, you open a site,[1:05:21] you start looking at the newsletter,[1:05:24] save 50%. Okay. That's fine.[1:05:29] Let me just close that. Where's the X. Oh, they've made the X invisible.[1:05:33] Okay. I'll just click around all that. Nope. That took me somewhere else.[1:05:38] Those tricksters. You finally get the ad closed. Okay. It's 10 minutes later.[1:05:42] You get the newsletter pop-up closed.[1:05:45] Then do you accept cookies taking up this much of the[1:05:50] bottom, this much of the bottom. Okay. Let's say no. I hit the X on that.[1:05:55] So what's the point of even asking, did the site go away?[1:05:59] The site's allowing me to do everything the same. And I've said, no,[1:06:02] I don't accept the cookies. So why even ask? And then every time,[1:06:07] look at this, I got another pop-up here. The best things in life are free.[1:06:12] There was a time. Let me do some internet etiquette for you guys.[1:06:17] Some internet history, some internet etiquette.[1:06:20] There was a time where if there was a site with a pop-up,[1:06:24] you were furious. It couldn't stand. Remember pop-up ads.[1:06:29] We actually dealt with this.[1:06:31] Like there was a time where people tried with the pop-up ads. We said no.[1:06:35] And pop-up ads went away for like 10, 12 years.[1:06:40] Then all of a sudden about four or five years ago,[1:06:45] every site said, let's hit them with about seven pop-ups.[1:06:49] Let's get these guys nuts.[1:06:52] And it's just working out for anybody. When I get an ad like that, I go,[1:06:56] I got to get out of here. I get overwhelmed. I throw everything away.[1:07:01] I stopped buying what I'm buying.[1:07:03] You know how many little coffee mugs on Instagram that got added to the cart?[1:07:07] They're emailing me. Are you sure you left this in your cart?[1:07:11] Too many ads. We, I think we got to fight back on this. Where's Matt Walsh.[1:07:16] Where's the daily wire with this.[1:07:18] Why can't we all team up to fight against something like this?[1:07:22] Jules they love pop-ups, but no,[1:07:24] instead we're trying to kick Robin Tran out of a little kid's dressing room just[1:07:28] because she's simply going, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa.[1:07:33] Waste of time, you know, um,[1:07:38] do you know as a trans person,[1:07:39] you're not allowed to take someone else's child and shove them against your[1:07:42] cock. It's unbelievable. So these are the signs. Look at this,[1:07:46] the history of the boys town rainbow pylons.[1:07:53] And there are these giant a hundred foot statues made out of like[1:07:58] gold. I mean, look at that. Try building one of those.[1:08:02] That's at least a hundred grand and there's thousands of them. It's classy.[1:08:06] So I go, why are they spending my money on this?[1:08:09] Just because a bunch of people are, uh, sucking each other's cocks.[1:08:14] That came up as a separate page.[1:08:16] Look at that. Still planning a trip to Chicago. Look at all this nonsense.[1:08:20] There's a separate window pop-up. I didn't know that.[1:08:22] That's what I'm talking about. The whole thing's a massive.[1:08:25] We're just allowing it, you know, we're allowing it. You know,[1:08:29] you tune into kill Tony. Now there's at least 17 ads.[1:08:33] They're burning during the middle of the show. Now kill Tony just stops.[1:08:37] And it's just them screaming ads. This they're there.[1:08:41] This must come to an end. You know, now you're all complaining.[1:08:45] Did you see Twitch this morning? Let's show them that let's show them Twitch.[1:08:48] But wait, you're in the middle of talking about two different things.[1:08:51] Okay. I talked about boys sound. I'm sick of spending money for this, uh,[1:08:55] pillar. That was your main point.[1:08:57] A hundred percent. Could you imagine? That's why I moved out of this city.[1:09:02] I'm not going to a city where every tax dollar I have goes to this.[1:09:07] And by the way, it's like what to shove this up.[1:09:09] The biggest gay guy's ass there. Is that what it's for?[1:09:11] So if the King gay comes by, we get something for him.[1:09:14] I thought you were going to say that you used to hate pride parades so much,[1:09:18] but now that everybody hates them.[1:09:20] Yes. Then it's like, well, my point was,[1:09:24] where were you at the beginning? You could have,[1:09:29] you know, put a stop to this a long time ago,[1:09:32] but now you've you've let it go on. It's been so normal.[1:09:36] And now you're all shocked by it.[1:09:38] I can't believe YouTube is even allowing this every daily wire video.[1:09:43] You go to Michael knows, go to Michael knows his YouTube. I mean,[1:09:47] I thought you weren't allowed to bully and harass[1:09:52] show the world has successfully.[1:09:54] You're now allowed to fully gay bash on YouTube.[1:09:58] You're fully allowed to hate the gays. You know,[1:10:01] I was an early, uh, I,[1:10:05] I made a song.[1:10:07] I was involved in gay bashing back when gay bashing was[1:10:12] a funny thing. Still, it was a funny thing. And people understood you go,[1:10:17] Oh, this guy is so gay sucks. And people would laugh and laugh and laugh,[1:10:21] but everybody still, it didn't mean you actually hated any gay people. Now,[1:10:26] you know, everybody fully just hates gay.[1:10:30] We're all up to speed on this, right? It's not even something. I mean,[1:10:34] this really just happened overnight. It went from, and it was so weird.[1:10:38] Cause when Caitlyn Jenner came out,[1:10:42] there wasn't even this much of a controversy over trans people.[1:10:46] The bud light thing with that, you know,[1:10:51] I saw her the other day.[1:10:52] I understand why she needs to be fully stopped.[1:10:57] He Dylan Malaney.[1:11:01] Yeah, of course. But ever since that happened,[1:11:05] people just went crazy. And now it's just full.[1:11:08] We are done with pride. We are done with this gay pride parade.[1:11:14] We are done with any gay thing, which I,[1:11:18] it's just weird timing. Why didn't you have this stance?[1:11:22] When they started introducing all this stuff, like I did, you know,[1:11:27] I had this stance 20 years ago and then was forced to get used to it.[1:11:34] You know,[1:11:35] you know how many pride parades I would get on the train and I'd see people in[1:11:38] Chicago coming back from the pride parade. I go, Ooh, Ooh, Ooh, Ooh,[1:11:43] and it wasn't because they were gay.[1:11:46] It was because they were covered in zits.[1:11:49] The city gays.[1:11:53] And you've seen this in a New York street shows with street[1:11:58] rat homos, such as girls. You've seen the show girls. You've seen that.[1:12:02] What's the other show with the two Jewish broad city, broad city.[1:12:06] And you see the kind of homo homos that are on[1:12:11] those types of shows. And they're in the city and it's hot.[1:12:15] They always do the pride parade when it's very sweaty.[1:12:18] And usually a gay pride goer, the people who go to the parade,[1:12:23] what they are is they're a little overweight,[1:12:25] but they're wearing a much smaller shirt than they should.[1:12:30] You know, like imagine Lena Dunham,[1:12:32] remember Lena Dunham would go out of her way to look[1:12:36] repulsive and to really make you nausea.[1:12:40] They really found the secret to not only make, can you go, Oh, I hate their kind,[1:12:45] but to make you go, Oh, I'm slightly,[1:12:48] lightly nauseous. You know, and I get it.[1:12:53] It's the hot, hot summer. It's August in Chicago.[1:12:57] It's hotter than July. It's the summer when niggas die. That's Nas.[1:13:03] That's a Nas Kanye West song. Hotter than July.[1:13:09] It's the summer when niggas die. It's the summer when niggas try. Nas.[1:13:14] Perfect impression of Nas. That's a good song.[1:13:17] I liked that song with him and Kanye West off the new Nas album.[1:13:22] So it'd be July.[1:13:24] And I remember I would like use the L train in Chicago and then boom, boom,[1:13:28] boom, boom, boom. They'd all pile in and they'd all have acne on top of acne.[1:13:32] And they'd have the cheapest little tank top on and they'd have the hairy[1:13:37] armpits with the acne coming out.[1:13:39] They'd have the knees with the zits all over the knees.[1:13:43] They'd have zits here with a little hair coming out and they'd have the big[1:13:46] plastic glasses. You could smell their breath.[1:13:49] The whole train would start smelling like the gay man's breath.[1:13:55] And it really wasn't the gay man that did us dirty.[1:13:59] It was the gay woman. Okay, let's do the history of the lesbian.[1:14:03] The real concern in the world here. Again,[1:14:08] it is not trans people. It is not gay people.[1:14:11] It is lesbians that have made us fearful to[1:14:15] share our cities with pride without lesbians.[1:14:21] Pride. Wouldn't be as bad. Uh,[1:14:25] these pride parades are[1:14:31] very harsh because of the style of girl and you see a girl there and her hair's[1:14:36] all frizzy and dirty and she's got grease all over the zits and[1:14:41] that acne. Yes.[1:14:42] They're trying to keep you away and they've got a little belly and a little gut[1:14:46] sticking out. Oh, it's so repulsive to me.[1:14:49] And they don't care if they're like dripping in sweat and they don't shower.[1:14:54] They're all laughing it up like Lena Dunham.[1:14:57] And that's really the problem we have. You know, it's not homosexuality.[1:15:03] It's this disgustery. And I think a lot of people,[1:15:06] it's very hard for them to go, I hate disgusting.[1:15:11] People, you know,[1:15:13] they see this Dylan Maveni and I get it.[1:15:16] That's a very vile.[1:15:18] I remember the first time I saw that person on my screen. Of course,[1:15:23] that's a no brainer. Hate, hate, hate, hate, hate.[1:15:27] But not just because she put on a dress. I mean, I put on a dress all the time.[1:15:31] Remember summer of joy.[1:15:34] You didn't hate me and you didn't hate Robin Trent.[1:15:38] Robin Trent crushing it. By the way, I just saw a new clip of Robin Trent.[1:15:42] She's crushing it. Now imagine Robin,[1:15:44] Trent fully naked holding a cutoff head.[1:15:48] And then it's just a Bush. I mean, not a Bush. Uh, it's a, uh, full deck.[1:15:54] So imagine this. You don't have to imagine that.[1:15:59] Okay. Wait, listen, hear me out. Robin.[1:16:02] Trent's first debut album. I produce it.[1:16:05] She could hire a real company to do it. So I don't screw it up,[1:16:08] but I'll give the money.[1:16:09] All I want is this director's cut over the album cover.[1:16:14] And it will be a perfectly done recreation of[1:16:19] sleepaway camp. One's ending. What's her name from sleepaway camp.[1:16:24] Do we remember her name? Crystal? What was her name?[1:16:28] And she was holding the decapitated head, right?[1:16:32] Can we get the picture ending of sleepaway camp? One picture,[1:16:36] but we do this with Robin Trent and it shot beautifully.[1:16:40] It shot like the machine machine.[1:16:45] And it shot so beautifully in the lighting is all like kind of neon,[1:16:50] cool colors and stuff. Everything's really sharp.[1:16:52] Maybe we shoot it on a Leica M11.[1:16:57] We're part of the Leica family now, man.[1:16:59] Hey, wait, do you see our shots of the city?[1:17:03] Wait till you see our shots of the buildings. They look just like Leica shots.[1:17:07] Cause they are, they're not Fuji fakes. Let me show you this.[1:17:12] And are people following me with my stance on homophobia?[1:17:18] You know, and here at red bar, this is where again,[1:17:21] if you've seen John Wick four, which I bet you have, if you're on the right,[1:17:25] if you're on the right, you saw John Wick four in theaters,[1:17:29] so this is like the continental grounds, right?[1:17:34] Is that what you call it in John Wick? I seen every John Wick.[1:17:38] I had to watch a John Wick one through three recap YouTube video to figure out.[1:17:43] I didn't remember a lick of that. I didn't remember any of it.[1:17:47] And do you guys like John Wick is a joke, right?[1:17:50] I hope you like that movie is just a joke. It's like a meme.[1:17:54] Cause it's so stupid or you actually think that's so cool.[1:17:59] So I'm watching John Wick four and they have these areas where all the[1:18:01] criminals could get together, right?[1:18:04] But they don't hurt each other on criminal grounds. It's a continental or some,[1:18:09] no shooting, no shooting. And they're all half to the rule is,[1:18:14] and you've all seen John Wick.[1:18:17] The rule is, is that if you're in one of these hotels in New York,[1:18:23] even if you're or Soho,[1:18:26] uh,[1:18:26] even if it's your biggest enemy and you're in the lobby with him,[1:18:29] there's no hurting each other on these grounds. It's a rule.[1:18:31] Although they all seem to hurt each other on these grounds.[1:18:34] Nobody followed the rule once wherever.[1:18:38] I don't think unless the recap was off.[1:18:42] So that's what red bar is.[1:18:45] You're going to take, cause Dylan Maveni is a fan of the show.[1:18:51] Just kidding. I wouldn't allow that. That would be, I would say, no,[1:18:53] you've got to get out of here. You're, you're screwing up my business. Nope.[1:18:56] You're taken away from my business, but I want red bar.[1:19:00] And you'll see here today with some red bar in the wilds. Again,[1:19:03] we've got them on both sides. I want[1:19:08] like somebody who's killed a trans person. Okay.[1:19:13] Like a January six killed a trans person by shooting a[1:19:18] shotgun into their head. And it's a secret. Nobody's caught them yet.[1:19:22] I want that guy listening. And then I also want,[1:19:28] you know, as much of an opposite of that guy as you can on the other side.[1:19:32] So just a decent person listening as well.[1:19:37] And, uh, you're all to get along on these grounds.[1:19:42] You have to,[1:19:44] and there's no, and you can't start turning it to one side or the other.[1:19:47] You can't go, Oh yeah, well, if those people are on this grounds,[1:19:49] then maybe Mike's the enemy. No, no, no, no, no, no. Sorry.[1:19:55] It's the rules and you'll be the table in[1:19:59] the, they will come down on you. They'll come down on you.[1:20:02] Then it'll be a jewel.[1:20:04] Me to cuckoo verse, uh, Jeff leach,[1:20:08] of course in a dual. And I will be the guy, the cheating,[1:20:13] the cheating little rat in Paris.[1:20:17] Who's ahead of the whole thing.[1:20:19] I'll be the cheating little rat and you can't defeat me.[1:20:22] It's a losing battle wick. We watched John wick last night.[1:20:27] It's in my head. It is in my head too. We hated it. We just hated it.[1:20:31] I kind of find it. I get it. So that's my point here today.[1:20:35] Is it relaxing to, I kind of find it relaxing. No,[1:20:40] like nope, nope, nope, nope. Hated it.[1:20:43] So that's my point here today. Is that the reason you started talking about,[1:20:47] I'm wrapping that up is because of the apple event,[1:20:50] which we're talking about vision pro. Yes. At the apple event,[1:20:53] they opened up with a big,[1:20:56] beautifully built rainbow to stick it to that.[1:21:01] They're going, we ain't going no, it was nice because pride's being[1:21:06] attacked. You know, I don't know if I've made myself clear.[1:21:10] I don't know if I am clear, but you just can't go around.[1:21:18] You know boycotting target[1:21:23] because of what they can do to your kids.[1:21:26] You can't care about kids this much. You have to get over the kids.[1:21:31] Otherwise you're acting pedophilic.[1:21:35] I[1:21:39] obviously don't care what people do.[1:21:40] I just want them to get together and be friends on our grounds.[1:21:45] And my,[1:21:48] the best thing I could say about these situations like this is once you see a[1:21:53] situation, situational lies, you back out.[1:21:58] Okay. So that's the best thing you could do.[1:22:01] Like when you see everybody fighting about George Floyd, you go, Oh,[1:22:04] that's one of those main fights.[1:22:06] Now I'm going to normalize and back out.[1:22:11] You can't be part of the main fight of the main[1:22:16] jerk off fight that everybody's having. So once you see that,[1:22:20] regardless of if you have a take or if you stand on one side or the other,[1:22:24] you got to go, Oh, that's one of those[1:22:28] main crazy fights. So you have to drop both sides.[1:22:33] You have to stop caring about this[1:22:37] incident now.[1:22:39] And you just certainly can't argue like that in the bring back group about[1:22:43] something like that.[1:22:44] I couldn't believe there were guys doing the whole George Floyd thing.[1:22:48] Somebody brought up George Floyd and they're like, yeah, man,[1:22:50] that fentanyl addict. I'm so glad he's gone. And then another guy was like,[1:22:55] are you kidding me? I'm not into cops standing on necks.[1:22:59] And I was looking at this. I wanted to kill myself. I wanted to kill myself.[1:23:03] I couldn't believe how faggoty it was.[1:23:06] So that's where it needs to end. It's like,[1:23:08] it doesn't matter what you think you're not allowed to be involved in one of[1:23:13] earth's jerky arguments as a[1:23:18] red bar fan.[1:23:19] So you didn't watch what is a woman this week?[1:23:22] Absolutely not. The things have gone too far there.[1:23:25] That's where you got to step back and you got to go, well,[1:23:27] I can't be a part of this. I'm this much of a loser.[1:23:32] So I hope that makes sense to people out there. And[1:23:37] there is no right way to go about these things. There's only one right way.[1:23:41] And that is to back out of these things and just try it, just try it.[1:23:46] You don't gotta be on anybody's side. Don't let them force you.[1:23:50] Don't let them force you like they forced me because now I'm on the side of the[1:23:55] haters.[1:23:56] There are two factions forming that you actually do have to take sides on.[1:24:00] And that is, are we wearing the headsets or not?[1:24:04] No, I'm not getting into that too,[1:24:06] because that's another one that I'm pulling out of. I just wanted to know,[1:24:10] I can't believe it. Oh, well, here it is.[1:24:13] Ethan Klein and his son have decided that the[1:24:18] apple goggles are[1:24:23] so stupid and retarded.[1:24:28] So is that the side you want to be on?[1:24:30] Is that the side you want to be on?[1:24:32] It seems like we're pro goggles around. Chad, I was looking,[1:24:36] it seemed like they agree with you.[1:24:37] I found it to be, well, again, that's what I mean.[1:24:40] I don't really have my research down.[1:24:44] Break this thing over my knee today. Really? I hate glass.[1:24:49] He's loopy folks.[1:24:52] The apple goggles came out and I saw the discourse around this people getting[1:24:56] upset. And it was a similar upsetness.[1:24:59] Like I get when I start hearing about people using chat GPT,[1:25:04] do you know how many people think chat GPT is like a fact checking[1:25:08] device? Like it's a hundred percent reasonable.[1:25:12] Most people think chat GPT is just a magic platform that helps[1:25:17] you with anything.[1:25:18] Like people like Logan Paul are using[1:25:22] chat GPT in their daily lives.[1:25:25] They were immediately in,[1:25:28] and they're trying to figure out how could I cheat to win using chat GPT.[1:25:33] So I understand the hatred towards something like that,[1:25:38] but, um,[1:25:39] I feel like the people who are mad at the apple goggles are being a little[1:25:44] hatred.[1:25:45] See,[1:25:46] just wait to see what it's like before you go.[1:25:48] A lot of very definitive opinion.[1:25:51] I don't have a definitive opinion in my whole life,[1:25:54] except for Jeremiah wonders must be stopped.[1:25:58] And even that is bendable based on how much he's willing to pay[1:26:04] or how much he's willing to change. You know,[1:26:05] all I want to see is people grow jewels. That's,[1:26:09] you see these bullshit podcasters,[1:26:11] what they want to do is they want to make fun of everybody like us,[1:26:14] but you can't just admit that. So these bullshit podcasters, they go,[1:26:18] I just want to see people like grow and mature and change.[1:26:23] Right. You ever seen this now? This is what people pretend that they're,[1:26:26] I just want to like, you know, to see him grow and be mature.[1:26:30] Please do not mature. Do not grow. You know,[1:26:35] it was like the items thing.[1:26:38] So we can't change. We can't corrupt. No, please. No, you can't.[1:26:42] Ooh, growing up. No, thank you.[1:26:47] Maturing says who mature to what, who's to whose level.[1:26:54] So with the Apple goggles, I saw it.[1:26:57] I didn't like what I saw with Hassan and Ethan.[1:27:01] Both of them were completely against the Apple goggles.[1:27:04] Shouldn't it be so excited to see a big movie theater in your house?[1:27:09] Talk about classes on, not everybody can afford a home theater,[1:27:14] and they need to wear the goggles. That's a problem with you.[1:27:17] I like that. It's a lot of money. Listen, everybody is like,[1:27:21] I don't even think it's that crazy. I mean, it's a whole new type of course.[1:27:25] I feel like it tapped into people's like, uh,[1:27:29] tapped into people's fear. Okay. They're exhausted. So everyone's exhausted.[1:27:34] And now they go, I got to learn this whole new thing.[1:27:36] I got to be in this AR world. I got to start now.[1:27:39] I really got to focus here. Cause I got a lot of new stuff to learn.[1:27:43] And maybe it will suck, but why don't we just wait and see and hope it's good.[1:27:47] Yeah. I might be using it on the show. You might just see me doing like this.[1:27:51] I know I want my whole desk. Can you get a direct feed?[1:27:54] Cause imagine if I could just have all the stuff pop up and then you have a[1:27:58] direct feed to what I'm seeing in my goggles. It's a new way to watch.[1:28:03] And I don't listen. I'm not excited about this. So, so expensive.[1:28:06] I think they're comparing it to like a phone price, but it's a computer.[1:28:10] Meanwhile,[1:28:10] these guys are building PCs so that they could play a call of duty from[1:28:14] 2008, where it's more accurate. You think that looks good to call of duty.[1:28:20] You think that looks good. You're running in fast motion, buddy.[1:28:24] It's not look, doesn't look real to me at all. And your computer builds,[1:28:29] you're so proud of your computer builds.[1:28:31] I don't even understand what needs to be built to make this[1:28:36] happen. You buy a computer off the shelf, nine 79, it runs the game. Fine.[1:28:41] I think you guys are all confused.[1:28:43] You're doing too many options in the game settings pain.[1:28:48] You're screwing up the computer. You think you need all this stuff.[1:28:51] You don't need anything. You could run a,[1:28:54] the best game in the world on this old iPad. It runs just fine.[1:28:58] So I don't understand why they're building. Oh, they need the PC.[1:29:02] A lot of people are confused out there, but listen,[1:29:05] I don't have a definitive when I saw this, when I saw the behavior over, yeah,[1:29:09] maybe we could just show Hassan real quick, quick, the Hassan clip.[1:29:13] This'll make much more sense.[1:29:15] Cause it's this attitude. It says nothing to do about Apple vision.[1:29:19] We don't cover Apple vision pro here.[1:29:27] And you know, I feel bad for the guys at Apple. They're thinking, Oh,[1:29:30] the world's going to be so excited when they see these goggles we've made.[1:29:33] And then to see people like Hassan treat it like this. I thought the attitude,[1:29:38] just the attitude behind this was, was what I'm talking about.[1:29:43] And this is kind of what I want to show people here, Hassan.[1:29:47] And this is the attitude that I beg people, uh,[1:29:51] not to have. This is all I ask.[1:29:54] I ask you just not to have a definitive attitude.[1:29:57] How many of you raise your hands?[1:29:59] Think I have one of these definitive attitudes. You're wrong.[1:30:04] You'd be wrong to raise your hand on that.[1:30:07] I actually am a very open-ended here. Very open-ended.[1:30:11] I've got some strong opinions,[1:30:14] but they're meaningless opinions. They mean nothing. Okay.[1:30:20] Uh, I've died and come back to life folks.[1:30:22] It's granted me many small little[1:30:26] powers of, you know, like that where I could care less about, Oh no,[1:30:31] I was wrong.[1:30:33] And I don't really come off that wrong that often because I don't get too[1:30:37] definitive. And this is a behavior I see on Twitter.[1:30:41] This is a behavior I see in these groups.[1:30:44] And I don't want to see this unless it's with a beautiful smile and a beautiful[1:30:50] sarcasm attached to it. But look what, how Hassan's acting.[1:30:53] I think this is gonna, you'll get the idea here.[1:30:57] It's your favorite stories.[1:30:59] He's watching the apple.[1:31:01] I'm calling it. They will make one product for this and drop it.[1:31:06] There's no shot. Like they'll do like one thing where, Oh,[1:31:10] you're watching baby Yoda or whatever. Grogu, you know,[1:31:14] on the Mandalorian, but you're inside of a spaceship and then that's it.[1:31:18] There's no way. Also, why would you, why,[1:31:23] why do you need this? Do you need to sit? Do you need to put on[1:31:28] AR headset to like watch TV?[1:31:32] Yeah. I think that you're inside of a spaceship. Like what benefit does that?[1:31:36] Whininess. So what is really going on here with this AI AR?[1:31:41] It's an option.[1:31:43] I don't understand why they're so unsupportive of something.[1:31:47] When apple comes out with a new thing,[1:31:48] I'm very supportive of the company and I like to help promote them.[1:31:54] It's the closest Mike ever gets to going to church.[1:31:57] Yeah. These keynotes, these WWDCs.[1:32:00] Tell him what to believe. He goes, I don't know, maybe, but I'm open to it.[1:32:05] And I'm not a fan of anybody that works at apple. You know,[1:32:08] when I see these people,[1:32:09] I get like violent in my head about the things I'd want to do to them.[1:32:14] And I start making fun of their nationalities and their race and their names.[1:32:18] I can't stand the people who work at apple.[1:32:22] I can't stand the products,[1:32:24] but you got to support the corporation.[1:32:29] Listen to that offer you, Oh my God, I'm losing my mind.[1:32:33] You could do more. This is him hating. Also,[1:32:37] this is like kind of weird,[1:32:40] but I love, uh, social watching.[1:32:45] You know what I mean? Like I love watching TV with my mom and dad.[1:32:49] I love watching TV with my friends. You know what I mean?[1:32:52] So like this kind of eliminates that entirely.[1:32:55] Like you just put the headset on and then all of a sudden you're just by[1:33:00] yourself, even if you're around people like, yes,[1:33:03] it's for when you're by yourself. Got it. Oh, this is sick, dude.[1:33:06] I really wanted this.[1:33:07] Why put yourself in a position to ever have to like,[1:33:12] come off as completely wrong and take like a giant owl like that.[1:33:17] You know what I mean? Why put yourself in a position? Why be so,[1:33:22] sure that this is so stupid without even getting your hands on it.[1:33:28] What if it's the coolest set of goggles you've ever seen in? Yes.[1:33:31] I want people wearing masks.[1:33:36] Maybe his son would like it if a little mask dropped out and covered his mouth.[1:33:41] Huh? The libs are into those.[1:33:44] You guys ever see somebody with a mask at a store and get,[1:33:47] you want to punch him even though you're not against masks.[1:33:51] When I see a lib at a store with a mask, I go,[1:33:58] you better leave better. Fucking leave.[1:34:03] And I love masks. That was the best part of the lockdown,[1:34:08] locking people's trap shop with those masks.[1:34:14] Let's just watch a little bit more. Why would they show sports?[1:34:17] That's like one of the major social washing, uh, things like maybe you got,[1:34:22] maybe you want to watch something on your own and you want to watch a movie on[1:34:25] your own, but sports, like you definitely watch that with a whiny hater,[1:34:29] never catch yourself whining like his son or Ethan[1:34:33] Klein. Yuck. It is a beta beta way to be.[1:34:38] Okay. Uh, I'm excited about this. This was the top news of the day.[1:34:43] You want to do some light news here? Jules.[1:34:51] Yeah. The theme show that guy, you know,[1:34:53] they weren't even that thankful for the thousand dollars. Those two winners,[1:34:57] they go, here's my bedroom. Here's my bedroom.[1:35:01] That's what people do in this show. They, uh, oh,[1:35:04] and also for remember I said, red bar in the wild, you'll get a hundred bucks.[1:35:09] Yeah. Did people? Yeah. One guy, he emailed, I couldn't believe it.[1:35:13] He emails me and goes, Oh, if you're serious about the a hundred bucks,[1:35:16] here's my bundle. Okay. Okay.[1:35:20] He needs a hundred. He needs a hundred. Okay.[1:35:24] I couldn't believe those guys for that contest. They took the thousand.[1:35:27] There was no even thank you. Maybe there was maybe that could be completely off.[1:35:33] Just how funny would that be? If there was no thank you, it might be funnier.[1:35:38] Sorry. I'm wearing a vitamin patch. I'm all screwed up. All right.[1:35:42] Let me show you this.[1:35:43] We're very nice. And you were thinking of someone else.[1:35:45] The new Twitch TOS. I love this. Who, you know, when, when they said, Mike,[1:35:50] there's nothing wrong with ads, he can fast forward through ads.[1:35:53] Ads will never hurt the world. For those you don't know,[1:35:56] red bar is violently anti ad.[1:36:02] Mike, you just, Nope. No, I didn't.[1:36:06] Twitch has some new branded content. Now I'm anti Twitch as[1:36:11] well. I'm anti every show on Twitch.[1:36:14] There's not one show on Twitch that I'm allowing you guys to watch or that I[1:36:19] think is a good idea.[1:36:20] Well, this is great. Cause all the streamers are very pissed.[1:36:22] Good. I want the streamers pissed. I want people who do ads mad.[1:36:28] Okay. Anytime somebody's concocted their,[1:36:31] their whole life to sell you some, uh, some garbage,[1:36:35] I want them to be mad.[1:36:36] So I always celebrate when an ad issue[1:36:41] comes up and here's another one, you know, I spent my whole week,[1:36:46] uh,[1:36:48] knee deep in this phase rain verse Sarah's[1:36:52] story. What's your name? Grace. Yeah.[1:36:56] Are you guys on Grace's side or phase rain?[1:37:00] I don't know anything about that. I'm just kidding.[1:37:02] I don't know anything about it either except every detail. So look at this.[1:37:07] And I, this video game watching, please tell me you don't do that.[1:37:11] Please tell me you're not watching other people play video games on Twitch.[1:37:16] That was the worst thing we could have ever let people start doing.[1:37:20] So look at this. I watch Kumiya play on YouTube. Yeah.[1:37:24] On YouTube is fine.[1:37:28] And by the way, Kumiya just keeps dying. He sucks. Every time I tune in,[1:37:32] he's just getting shot and go, Oh yeah,[1:37:34] that's because in making some excuse single time,[1:37:37] he gets killed. So he's not even good at game.[1:37:41] I thought I was going to tune in. He was going to be like tearing shit up on[1:37:44] there, but he's staying.[1:37:45] So listen to this Twitch has some new branded content[1:37:50] guidelines. Everybody's mad.[1:37:54] On stream logos are now limited to 3%[1:37:59] of screen size. So what does that mean? Jules?[1:38:02] If you click the images, it kind of has a visual representation.[1:38:05] The yellow one is what is allowed and everything else is no longer allowed.[1:38:10] Okay. The yellow one is,[1:38:12] so you're allowed to have a tiny ad in the corner of your screen like that,[1:38:17] like that. Yes. Okay. So that's allowed,[1:38:20] but everything else and you can click through the rest. It's all not allowed.[1:38:23] So like a full screen. So this is not allowed.[1:38:25] You can't do full screen ads anymore on Twitch.[1:38:29] They want it to be classier.[1:38:32] What is the idea?[1:38:33] The idea is that they want people getting their ad money through Twitch and not[1:38:37] making their own deals.[1:38:38] So if you've ever tuned into any sort of show, it's gone haywire,[1:38:42] especially on Twitch. Now,[1:38:44] I don't know how these kids even figure out how to use all these Twitch add-ons.[1:38:49] This thing has perplexed me. Like if you said, Mike, uh,[1:38:53] have somebody chat and then it pops up on the show and shows their chat.[1:38:58] How are they doing that?[1:39:01] Couldn't tell you. Couldn't tell you. I got all this stuff here,[1:39:06] millions and millions of dollars of stuff. But if you said, Mike,[1:39:10] make it so a sound happens when someone donates, I go,[1:39:15] that how are they doing that? Okay. Here's what,[1:39:20] what else they're banning burned in video ads are not[1:39:24] allowed. So you can't do like a live read. Like,[1:39:28] you know how, when you watch kill Tony, it cuts to a burned in video ad,[1:39:32] not allowed. It has to be through Twitch's system. Ooh, I love this.[1:39:36] Please YouTube do this, please. So yeah,[1:39:40] they don't want people running their own ads on their shows anymore and going[1:39:45] outside of the Twitch system. Exactly.[1:39:51] This is so good.[1:39:52] We got some sort of reward for not doing ads all of these years.[1:39:57] It would be nice if I got a reward for never doing any ads at all.[1:40:01] And this is kind of a reward. If YouTube did something, very funny.[1:40:06] Last week on the show on the last episode,[1:40:08] I said I wanted to triple the subscriber base. We did it.[1:40:13] You guys listened. It tripled.[1:40:18] We're up to 600 paid[1:40:22] subscribers. Thank you guys so much.[1:40:25] And all week last week before Mike got sick, we were working on March. So.[1:40:29] Wait, wait, wait. I've got a whole thing. Okay.[1:40:32] To announce beautiful jewels. Just beautiful.[1:40:37] I'm kidding. I'll announce, I'll announce[1:40:43] you're no longer allowed to do burned in display ads.[1:40:48] I don't know what that is.[1:40:49] And you're also not allowed to do burned in audio ads.[1:40:52] So people are going nuts in picture.[1:40:54] It shows like you're not allowed to have it at the bottom of your screen.[1:40:56] So you can't do this anymore. See that purple nonsense.[1:40:59] And no playing audio and no playing audio up there.[1:41:03] You gamers stick to the games. And I'm glad,[1:41:08] I'm so glad that they're furious about this. What,[1:41:11] and what a losing world to sit around.[1:41:15] It's like, who would have thought,[1:41:16] maybe a building your whole company on someone else's grounds[1:41:21] might be just a bad idea. Who would have thought? Who would have thought?[1:41:25] So I love when stuff like this happens because you're getting everything[1:41:29] handed to you for free. You took the easy route. You went on Twitch.[1:41:34] You want Twitch to promote your show to everybody. You know,[1:41:38] you don't have any marketing, right?[1:41:39] You don't do any marketing for your show Twitch does. So you want to do your show.[1:41:43] You want Twitch to promote it to everybody to get you viewers.[1:41:46] You want Twitch to pay for the bandwidth Twitch to build the whole page for you[1:41:52] Twitch to run the whole backend. Uh,[1:41:55] and then you thought you could do whatever you want.[1:41:57] Now you're crying because well, they're in charge, aren't they?[1:42:02] And they get to set the rules. Who would have thought?[1:42:04] Who would have guessed that you have a boss? You know,[1:42:08] people like Ethan Klein, all these people,[1:42:09] they're building these giant companies.[1:42:11] And when you see Ethan Klein complain out of you goes, come on YouTube.[1:42:16] I'm running a company here. They never said,[1:42:19] come run your company on YouTube.[1:42:23] This was meant for hobbyists. This was meant to post a personal video.[1:42:27] You guys are the ones who started wheeling and dealing and playing the[1:42:32] algorithm like a slot machine. And now look, what's going to happen to you.[1:42:37] And guess what? YouTube could one day go, uh, we're sick of doing YouTube. Bye.[1:42:41] Then what? Then where's your subscribers? Where's your archive?[1:42:46] Where does it all go?[1:42:50] Uh, so I love seeing this with Twitch.[1:42:51] I love it and I hope they keep fucking over these creators.[1:42:54] I'm sure they'll change it back or something.[1:42:56] Once they saw how mad everybody is and it was all just a pipe dream.[1:43:01] You know, put on some jelly roll for me while I light this joint,[1:43:04] put on a lost cause and uh, let's show everybody what happened.[1:43:09] Yeah. From the beginning, please.[1:43:11] Two, three, jolly roll.[1:43:14] I got to find a light.[1:43:17] Have some, uh,[1:43:18] shmi with me as we kick things up a notch here at[1:43:23] red bar. It's jelly roll with lost cause[1:43:28] off the new album, lost cause[1:43:31] somebody save me,[1:43:35] me from myself.[1:43:39] Come on.[1:43:44] Living in hell.[1:43:48] They say my lifestyle is bad for my health.[1:43:57] It's the only thing that seems to help.[1:44:04] Here we go.[1:44:07] All of this drinking and smoking is hopeless, but feel like it's all that I need.[1:44:14] Something inside of me is broken.[1:44:18] I hold on to anything that sets me free.[1:44:23] I'm a lost cause.[1:44:26] Everybody, baby, don't waste your time on me.[1:44:32] I'm so damaged beyond repair.[1:44:35] This has been in my head all week.[1:44:36] Life has shattered my hopes and my dreams.[1:44:40] Uh oh. Whoa, oh my God.[1:44:45] Baby, don't waste your time on me.[1:44:49] I'm so damaged beyond repair.[1:44:53] I've never seen that happen.[1:44:55] Life has shattered my hopes and my dreams.[1:44:59] Wait till you hear the full CD version of this song as I lug it up another.[1:45:04] I've never seen them.[1:45:06] For those who don't know, I was smoking the joint.[1:45:07] I blew out in the entire joint, shot out of its paper[1:45:12] and just the stuffing of the joint flew everywhere.[1:45:14] Oh, wait, I got to change it.[1:45:15] Wait. Oh, OK. Speed it up to the middle there.[1:45:20] We're going to light another joint.[1:45:21] Listen to this remix.[1:45:23] The night sky was missing.[1:45:27] Guys, they added drums to this.[1:45:29] Listen to this.[1:45:30] There were no shooting stars to use wishing on you.[1:45:36] And all of my sorrow, I just washed them down.[1:45:46] This is all I've been listening to.[1:45:48] It's the only piece I've ever found.[1:45:55] That white baggy.[1:45:57] All of this drinking and smoking is hopeless,[1:46:01] but feel like it's all that I need.[1:46:05] Whoa. Something inside of me broke.[1:46:09] Oh, they're doing it this time.[1:46:12] Yes, this is an amazing version.[1:46:23] I'm so beyond prepared.[1:46:27] Life is shattered.[1:46:28] My hopes in my dreams.[1:46:31] I'm a lost cause, baby.[1:46:36] Don't waste your time on me.[1:46:40] I'm so damn it's beyond repair.[1:46:44] Life is shattered.[1:46:46] My hopes in my dreams.[1:46:51] Oh, hell yeah.[1:46:53] Jelly Roll.[1:46:55] Congrats on Jelly Roll just released his album just the other day.[1:47:00] We watched his Hulu documentary.[1:47:02] What was it called?[1:47:03] Life on the Roll or something like that?[1:47:05] That would actually be a great title.[1:47:07] What was it called?[1:47:08] Jelly Rolls Docs.[1:47:09] Send me that too.[1:47:10] I think it was also called Save Me.[1:47:12] The name of this song.[1:47:14] Listen to that Jelly Roll.[1:47:15] I got to give a round of applause for that.[1:47:17] Who would have thought so many of you knew about this Jelly Roll?[1:47:22] I brought him up on the last episode, showed you him on Joe Rogan.[1:47:27] And people were coming out of the woodwork all week.[1:47:31] There were like dozens and dozens of posts about Jelly Roll in the Bring Back[1:47:36] group and people messaging me all week about Jelly Roll.[1:47:42] We've got some great news on the day of Jelly Roll's album release.[1:47:51] On the day of his album release,[1:47:54] Jelly Roll watched our entire segment on him.[1:48:00] And we're going to show you that for our first Red Bar in the Wild.[1:48:05] You could get that wild music going.[1:48:08] I'm still trying to light up this sparker here.[1:48:11] I'm still trying to spark up this sparker.[1:48:15] It ain't lighting, OK?[1:48:25] It's Red Bar in the Wild.[1:48:26] This is where we've caught other people finding out about Red Bar,[1:48:31] watching Red Bar, talking about Red Bar.[1:48:34] My favorite segment of the show,[1:48:37] because I can't believe that people know what's going on over here.[1:48:41] Especially Mr. Roll.[1:48:42] And let's start with Jelly Roll.[1:48:45] Jelly Roll, unfortunately,[1:48:50] saw our coverage of him on the last episode.[1:48:53] And let's see what he could have seen.[1:48:56] This is his doc.[1:48:58] Do we have a threat about his coverage here?[1:49:01] Yes, we do. So check this out.[1:49:04] It's popping. There it is.[1:49:06] This is what Jelly Roll sees.[1:49:08] Thank you to this clipper here.[1:49:11] Look at this.[1:49:12] Jelly Roll submits to Joe Rogan.[1:49:17] And look at this beautiful thumbnail here.[1:49:19] They're made. The Clippers are getting good on the clipper.[1:49:22] Love it.[1:49:24] You guys get the sweat off my forehead for this one.[1:49:29] Edit out all the missteps.[1:49:31] So look at this. You've got so imagine Jelly Roll.[1:49:34] He's scrolling YouTube.[1:49:36] He's a name searcher.[1:49:38] All right. Let's wait.[1:49:39] He wakes up. He lights up a spliff.[1:49:42] Jelly Roll.[1:49:45] Oh, and then he's scrolling, huh?[1:49:47] He's seeing and then he lands on this and this one stops him in his tracks.[1:49:51] You know, there's a lot of Jelly Roll crap out there, fan based crap.[1:49:55] He wanted to see what people were saying about his new album.[1:49:57] Save Me. Is that what it's called?[1:50:00] Save Me. Somebody else.[1:50:03] We reviewed the whole album in the car this morning, by the way.[1:50:07] It was fake and Radio E.[1:50:10] He's trying to get you know, that Jelly Roll.[1:50:12] He's called Whitsitt Chapel.[1:50:15] No, it is not. Yes, it is.[1:50:16] Whitsitt Chapel.[1:50:19] Oh, really, dude?[1:50:23] Exactly.[1:50:24] Whitsitt Chapel.[1:50:26] That's a terrible name.[1:50:27] That's like the actual chapel that him and his big fat mama went to.[1:50:32] Man, going to chapel was like church.[1:50:36] That's where I learned how to be such a nice guy.[1:50:39] That's right. My new record.[1:50:42] I got a black choir.[1:50:46] Oh, remember when you went to church?[1:50:48] No. Church sucks for stupid idiots.[1:50:52] And by the way, I saw your documentary.[1:50:55] Your audience[1:50:58] is white trash and retarded.[1:51:01] Wait till you see me make fun of your poor audience weeping[1:51:05] that you changed their life.[1:51:07] Wait till you see what I do to your stupid white trash.[1:51:11] Poor audience.[1:51:14] They've all got white trash, right?[1:51:17] They've all got the worst face living in the worst state,[1:51:19] living in the worst city of the worst state with the worst face.[1:51:23] How do they even afford the concert?[1:51:25] Your listeners are poor.[1:51:28] Your fans.[1:51:30] Your listeners.[1:51:31] I didn't know Jelly Roll was such like a...[1:51:34] He's huge.[1:51:35] I mean, he's really getting popular right now, right, Jules?[1:51:38] I guess I'd never heard of him before his Rogan appearance.[1:51:41] So imagine this, Jelly Roll's just like...[1:51:43] But actually, after watching his doc, I kind of feel like thanking him[1:51:46] because he's keeping a lot of scary people contained in one place, distracted.[1:51:51] I hope this is not what I look like.[1:51:53] I hope this is not what I look like.[1:51:57] Just kidding.[1:51:58] I hope that is what I look like.[1:52:00] Idiots.[1:52:02] Here's Joe Rogan, of course.[1:52:03] And then this beautiful picture of Roll.[1:52:05] Guys, when you're making thumbnails,[1:52:07] always make me slightly larger than the other guys.[1:52:13] Come on, use your brains.[1:52:15] They got me as the smallest guy in the thumbnail.[1:52:18] You know what that means?[1:52:19] Subconsciously, these guys have dominated me.[1:52:22] Especially when he's wearing this pink shirt.[1:52:25] I mean, subconsciously, though, you know, the reality is[1:52:30] I have both of them under my[1:52:33] my knee.[1:52:35] And but that's why you've got to make me bigger in the thumbnail.[1:52:38] You can't make me that small in the thumbnail.[1:52:41] It already gives this idea that I'm the loser.[1:52:44] The wimp, the beta, the bitch,[1:52:47] the fag, the homo, the tran.[1:52:51] I refuse to be that person.[1:52:53] OK, I've worked long and hard on impressing people.[1:52:57] OK, can you get that music looping back?[1:52:59] I love that song.[1:53:01] I want to dance to it.[1:53:02] I want to smoke cigarettes with you guys like the idol, of course.[1:53:07] I hope you all watch to the idol.[1:53:11] So I'm going to be all over the place today.[1:53:13] You got to sit.[1:53:13] This is how I want you to watch the show.[1:53:18] Like this, OK, like Leo Scappi, Leo Scappi.[1:53:22] Oh, I got so much.[1:53:23] See, this is what happens when I wait a little too long to do a show.[1:53:27] I've got overlapping desires,[1:53:31] overlapping thrill.[1:53:35] I went to the doctor last week.[1:53:36] I said, Doctor, I'm suffering from overlapping thrill.[1:53:41] He said, all right.[1:53:43] Redbirds, Walter, then he shot himself.[1:53:46] So here we go.[1:53:47] This is what Jelly Roll.[1:53:48] Let's back to Jelly Roll back to Jelly Roll.[1:53:50] Jelly Roll is sitting at home.[1:53:52] He released his album.[1:53:53] And for those of you don't know, Jelly Roll is just as big as I spy.[1:54:01] Kama is a god.[1:54:03] Kama is a little gross little dog.[1:54:06] Kama is like a dog.[1:54:07] You come up going to hold you down.[1:54:12] You guys know ice spice.[1:54:15] Trump was right about this, bitch.[1:54:18] So I have that clip.[1:54:20] Let me show you this.[1:54:21] We're going all over the place.[1:54:23] Do you guys know ice spice?[1:54:26] Ice spice?[1:54:28] My buddy, Matt Healy[1:54:31] in big trouble for laughing at the idea that ice spice is an Eskimoic chink.[1:54:38] You hear that, Taylor?[1:54:40] I'll go one step further.[1:54:41] I think ice spice should be deported.[1:54:48] And sent back to where she came from.[1:54:52] You know, I don't like the fact that the Bronx has never grown up.[1:54:55] We're still putting this shit out and everyone is still behaving[1:54:58] like this in the Bronx.[1:55:01] You know, I am really sick of this Bronx is for a hundred years.[1:55:05] The Bronx has been pumping out low level, outdated retardation.[1:55:11] It's got a bad look.[1:55:12] The people in the Bronx, it's outdated.[1:55:16] We need to stop celebrating Queens.[1:55:20] The Bronx.[1:55:23] What else do you what are their burrow?[1:55:26] Do the recharge come from?[1:55:28] Kama going to hold you down.[1:55:30] Step by step, I think around.[1:55:34] Thank you, top.[1:55:35] I'm the top rapper now.[1:55:39] What did I say about her the other day?[1:55:41] What is the thing that she's done?[1:55:43] Do you know ice spice?[1:55:45] Let me show you this and then we'll get back to jelly roll.[1:55:48] Jelly roll sitting there.[1:55:49] It's better be good.[1:55:50] He's watching this now, jelly roll, and he's like,[1:55:53] oh, man, get back to me quickly.[1:55:57] The original clip he watched is also like this.[1:56:00] Yes, maddening.[1:56:02] And this is I see people all this all the time.[1:56:04] They go, he never got to wear this guy.[1:56:08] Send me a clip of talking about the nose.[1:56:10] He never got.[1:56:11] We're not the news.[1:56:13] We're an enjoyable[1:56:16] show about, you know, seeing what I could do.[1:56:21] It's not about these news clips.[1:56:23] I make it very uninteresting.[1:56:26] If you're just trying to tune in to figure out what's going on with the news,[1:56:28] you're going mad.[1:56:30] Well, this guy ever stop, stop my cup of tea.[1:56:35] I've got guys like who email me.[1:56:38] They go, Mike, can you please put time codes in the show[1:56:40] so we could jump right to them so we could get.[1:56:44] Why do you know how hard that would be?[1:56:47] First of all, you know how long that would take.[1:56:50] Casino when he hands him the muffins.[1:56:52] Of course. Look at this.[1:56:54] It's practically falling apart.[1:56:56] And this muffin has like eight blueberries in it.[1:56:59] I want every muffin to have the same amount of blueberries.[1:57:02] I spice and casino.[1:57:03] I spice and casino.[1:57:05] Do you know how long that would take?[1:57:07] That's me every time you put something in the suggestion box.[1:57:11] Hey, Mike, it would be really cool if like every segment was clipped[1:57:15] separately and you know how long they would take.[1:57:26] I've been doing this weird thing.[1:57:28] These aren't burps.[1:57:30] I can do this weird thing where if I push a certain way, you hear inside go.[1:57:37] To the side, yeah, like I feel this is what I do.[1:57:40] I push a certain way and then I could feel a release[1:57:44] and then escape here and you could feel the air like a here.[1:57:48] Oh, do you have a hole in your lung that's attached to your esophagus?[1:57:52] I have a hole in my heart.[1:57:55] Um, uh, the ice spice video with Trump and Nelk.[1:58:01] This is what you need to know.[1:58:03] This is this says it all.[1:58:05] So watch this because I didn't know who I spice was either, really.[1:58:09] And I'm sure all of you guys are getting told about ice spice.[1:58:13] And don't feel that if you go, oh, this is crap.[1:58:16] Music's, you know, in the tank.[1:58:17] I don't understand music anymore.[1:58:19] You're finally right.[1:58:22] It's finally happened.[1:58:23] Ice spice is too far.[1:58:27] 38 minutes, 38 minutes.[1:58:28] And watch this.[1:58:29] This is president Donald Trump on the Nelk boys podcast, 38 minutes in.[1:58:36] Jesus Christ.[1:58:37] This whole thing is barely 38 minutes.[1:58:39] It's at the end.[1:58:40] Yup.[1:58:41] I thought that was one of the first things they talked about.[1:58:45] So do you know the Nelk boys, this guy?[1:58:48] Hey everybody.[1:58:49] Happy dad just came out with a new location.[1:58:52] So I want you to buy it all up and make sure that we're supported as a[1:58:56] corporation.[1:58:57] Thank you.[1:58:59] So he's got, uh, Donald Trump on.[1:59:03] And he says this, watch this shit.[1:59:05] Kill that.[1:59:09] Disingenuous.[1:59:11] What's this?[1:59:12] Justin Trudeau.[1:59:13] I'm from Canada by the way, too.[1:59:15] Extraordinarily liberal as it turned out.[1:59:19] You know, I never liked one word because you really need more than one word to[1:59:22] define people, but it's already much, uh,[1:59:26] much different than people thought.[1:59:28] I had a pretty good relationship with him, but much better relationships with[1:59:32] some liberal spice.[1:59:34] Who the hell is spice?[1:59:38] Now I'll tell you why this is so good.[1:59:41] Uh, let me show you that one more time.[1:59:42] Much different than people thought.[1:59:44] I had a pretty good relationship with him, but much different.[1:59:46] I've had better relationships with some ice liberal spice.[1:59:50] Who the hell is spice?[1:59:52] This really sums it up beautifully without it's like Trump.[2:00:00] Trump should know who I spice.[2:00:01] No, that's what it is.[2:00:03] Let me tell you, no, there's so much going on here.[2:00:06] Nelk brings up this ice spice who brand new, you know, she comes out.[2:00:12] She goes, fuck on my Dean.[2:00:14] Fuck on my tongue.[2:00:15] You want my tongue?[2:00:16] Fuck on my Dean.[2:00:18] And then everybody goes, Oh, we love ice spice.[2:00:20] You love her as a meme.[2:00:22] Okay.[2:00:22] So what happened is a bunch of white people on tic-tac heard this really[2:00:28] retarded rap from this girl with retard eyes and curly hair living in the Bronx.[2:00:36] And they go, Oh, we love ice spice.[2:00:38] The same thing that they did to William hung from American idol, the actual[2:00:44] retard who would sing rocket man.[2:00:46] Remember I'm a walking man, Chinese retard singing rocket man.[2:00:51] And what did everybody on American idols community do?[2:00:54] And all of you guys at home, you said we love William hung and they made an album[2:01:00] of William hung singing off key Chinese versions of national hits like rocket man.[2:01:10] And everyone pretended, Oh, they love him.[2:01:12] Or they said they loved him.[2:01:13] You didn't love him.[2:01:15] He was, what's called a meme.[2:01:17] You love a laughing at this retard.[2:01:22] Now that's what happened to ice spice, but people are so dim now that they confuse[2:01:27] loving a meme with actually loving the person.[2:01:30] And since she is in a hip hop, they've taken their fear of the black man and[2:01:37] they've twisted it up with the love of the meme and they've confused[2:01:41] themselves to the highest degree yet.[2:01:43] And now all of a sudden ice spice equals amazing.[2:01:51] Do you guys follow me here?[2:01:53] Donald Trump wraps this up in half a millisecond.[2:01:57] Cause you know what?[2:01:58] Remember Donald Trump, when he was on the campaign trail, he had to have people[2:02:02] like, uh, uh, who was the guy little, little pump, little pimp, little pimp[2:02:09] so Donald Trump spent all this time learning about little pump, who he called[2:02:15] little pimp remember, and then he's like, little pimp pump, he had to spend all[2:02:21] this time learning Cardi B, little pump and all this nonsense.[2:02:28] And then he hears this better relationships with some ice liberal ice[2:02:33] spice.[2:02:33] Who the hell is ice spice?[2:02:35] He's had enough.[2:02:36] He's had enough.[2:02:40] I spice now and you could see, okay, it's just, it's not just somebody who[2:02:45] doesn't know it's okay with this bullshit again, what's this now about?[2:02:49] And he knows exactly.[2:02:51] He doesn't know I spice, but he knows, uh, Oh yeah, I'm on board with it.[2:02:59] You know, eventually he's going to say, I can't do this anymore.[2:03:03] I can't pretend to like the retard rappers anymore.[2:03:09] And you can see that in his face here.[2:03:11] So every time I hear ice bicycle, the hell's I spice is if she appears, I'm[2:03:16] going to flip out.[2:03:17] I, I can't take any more, no more ice spice.[2:03:23] I can't.[2:03:23] And that's really where he's at with this relationships with some ice liberal[2:03:28] ice spice.[2:03:29] Who the hell is I spice?[2:03:31] You're nice.[2:03:32] Like that and a munch.[2:03:34] You've, you've heard the song.[2:03:35] Go ahead.[2:03:35] Play it for you on the charts.[2:03:37] Play it.[2:03:37] Well, I like it.[2:03:39] Okay.[2:03:39] I like to see he's had a fucking enough with this shit, right?[2:03:44] Haven't we all down with ice spice.[2:03:50] I am going to be the Matt Walsh of ice spice.[2:03:53] I'll tell you that I'm going to take it real far.[2:03:57] Okay.[2:03:58] Just can you tell everyone, you know, this red bar is like the Matt Walsh, but for[2:04:01] ice spice only, and it's based on her ethnicity, it's an ethnicity based[2:04:08] crime.[2:04:09] You'd be right.[2:04:10] If you said that you'd be dead on the money.[2:04:14] You tell him he's against ice spice, but no, no, no, for her ethnicity, not her[2:04:18] music, that's secondary to what the hell kind of race she is, which he's had[2:04:24] enough of, he's had enough of that specifically type of race is getting a[2:04:29] little too, they don't even have to be trained anymore.[2:04:33] He was on stage with Taylor and she was whiter than Taylor.[2:04:37] It's not really give me the karma.[2:04:39] Put on the karma verse.[2:04:41] Taylor Swift did a collab with ice spice.[2:04:45] Listen, I mean, Trump knows what he's talking about here and he's going to win[2:04:49] presidency because people are sick of this ice spice much different.[2:04:52] I've had better relationships with some ice liberal ice spice.[2:04:56] Who the hell is ice spice?[2:04:58] You're nice.[2:04:58] Like the nah, nah, nah, nah munch.[2:05:00] You've, you've heard this all.[2:05:01] You understand how you're just, you're so sick of this shit every day.[2:05:05] There's some fucking new, uh, jigaboo that you got out.[2:05:10] Oh, that's rude.[2:05:13] Every day there's a new baboon.[2:05:14] You got to memorize.[2:05:16] It's enough.[2:05:17] You know, how long can we fake this funk of pretending we love ice spice?[2:05:26] No, we're scared to even know what we like anymore, you know, because of a hot 97[2:05:31] and, uh, Charlamagne, the God there you're making you too scared to hate these[2:05:38] people.[2:05:39] Uh, now again, so this is her and she ruined Taylor Swift's song so far.[2:05:45] Taylor Swift has ruined every video.[2:05:47] So if you're a Taylor Swift fan, let's pretend, okay.[2:05:50] What was the first video?[2:05:51] Anti-hero right?[2:05:52] Yes.[2:05:52] Okay.[2:05:52] That video was ruined because it was directed by her.[2:05:56] There was a big, long skit, big, long skit with Mike Birbiglia.[2:06:01] Okay.[2:06:01] Is there anything worse than a skit in a music video?[2:06:04] I don't know why they think they should put an outdated skit, a comedy list[2:06:10] outdated in, are they dying?[2:06:12] Laughing like little fucking kids.[2:06:14] Are they dying?[2:06:15] Laughing like two annoying girls that think they're so hot and popular having a[2:06:21] sleepover.[2:06:25] It's not funny.[2:06:26] We don't need the skit.[2:06:27] There's never been a good skit.[2:06:29] So I hated that anti-hero.[2:06:31] Give me the next video music video name.[2:06:33] Bejeweled.[2:06:34] Bejeweled.[2:06:34] Had a skit.[2:06:35] And Bejeweled was the one with the trans man in her bed.[2:06:39] What was Bejeweled then?[2:06:40] Oh, Bejeweled.[2:06:42] Listen to this.[2:06:43] So let's say you're at home.[2:06:44] You're like, I'm feeling Bejeweled because I thought that I ruled.[2:06:47] I could still make the whole place cooler.[2:06:50] Let's say that's your favorite song.[2:06:51] Well, guess what?[2:06:53] I hope you like Dita Von Teese because Taylor decided to direct, direct this[2:06:59] music video too.[2:07:00] And the whole thing is featuring pinup model Dita Von Teese.[2:07:08] I don't know what Taylor thinks Dita Von Teese is.[2:07:12] Nobody is actually a fan of Dita.[2:07:16] And Taylor was like, I am so honored for the queen.[2:07:21] We got the queen to do the video.[2:07:23] Dita Von Teese.[2:07:24] And she like bows.[2:07:25] It's like, no, no, no, that's not happening.[2:07:29] And then Dita Von Teese comes on with her fucking nervous energy.[2:07:34] This is Dita Von Teese stripping.[2:07:40] You look hideously ugly.[2:07:43] So the whole video Bejeweled ruined by Dita Von Teese.[2:07:46] Then Lavender Haze.[2:07:48] Let's say you're sitting at home.[2:07:49] I just want to change Lavender Haze.[2:07:54] The video is a full Arab trans man.[2:07:59] Hugging Taylor Swift in a best.[2:08:01] And now you're like, Ooh, Taylor Swift has the cooties.[2:08:06] Then she releases this video for Karma.[2:08:10] And who is the lead singer of this one?[2:08:12] Ice spice.[2:08:15] I think I felt a pain in my pussy.[2:08:19] I think I felt my pussy pump pain.[2:08:23] What's that mean?[2:08:24] This is Taylor Swift going, Hey, we want you to be in our new video.[2:08:28] Karma.[2:08:29] Karma.[2:08:29] What's up?[2:08:32] You know, it goes, Karma is my boyfriend.[2:08:35] Karma is like a dog.[2:08:36] Dog.[2:08:37] Ew.[2:08:39] Dog.[2:08:40] Ooh, smelly.[2:08:41] What?[2:08:42] You don't like dog?[2:08:43] Oh, no.[2:08:44] Dog is smelly.[2:08:47] Oh, she's like a person like that.[2:08:50] You bring up Karma is a dog.[2:08:51] It's actually like, so I can't even tell the difference smelly.[2:08:57] So it's like ice spice is a full fucking tard.[2:09:03] And she had to ask Taylor.[2:09:06] She didn't even know what Karma was.[2:09:07] This is really unfair to you because you've been trying really hard to be a[2:09:10] Swiftie for me.[2:09:11] And she's just, she's ruined it.[2:09:12] All four videos now are LGBT.[2:09:16] Yuck.[2:09:17] LGBT pew.[2:09:22] And I understand why they want to tear the target down from the seams.[2:09:27] It's you've pushed them too far.[2:09:28] Now, should you be tearing down a target as a normal man?[2:09:34] Should you actually be doing that or you secretly do it at home in your head?[2:09:38] You don't need to actually go to war with them.[2:09:40] You could just puke in a bucket and make fun of it behind their backs.[2:09:45] He just can't go up to human beings and say they need to be taken away.[2:09:49] All right.[2:09:49] Watch this.[2:09:50] This is how she ruined video five.[2:10:07] Okay.[2:10:07] Watch this.[2:10:08] Listen to her verse.[2:10:16] And she never leaving you alone.[2:10:17] Watch her put your ass on the throne.[2:10:20] Watch her put your ass on the throne.[2:10:22] Karma never leaving you alone.[2:10:25] Karma's like a bad, bad man.[2:10:27] Karma's like a fan.[2:10:29] Karma's like a bad sedan.[2:10:32] Ow.[2:10:33] Facts.[2:10:34] Karma's gonna make you not relax.[2:10:37] Karma's gonna...[2:10:38] That.[2:10:40] That's not a rap.[2:10:43] You know, imagine Ludacris.[2:10:45] What?[2:10:46] Coming in on this.[2:10:47] Where's Ludacris?[2:10:48] I think it should have been featuring.[2:10:50] You know, they closed the book.[2:10:53] You know, do you guys know about this?[2:10:55] This is not me saying this word, but in the music industry,[2:11:00] there is a sacred book.[2:11:02] It's like the evil dead book.[2:11:04] And when an artist really wants to, you know, do some numbers,[2:11:09] they have a meeting and the book is taken out of the safe[2:11:13] and it's dropped down in front of the artists while 12 lawyers[2:11:16] in suits sit on either side.[2:11:18] And this book is called The Book of Knickers.[2:11:23] That's not what I named it.[2:11:26] It is a book of nominees,[2:11:28] black people that could be used for your pop song.[2:11:33] So you're turning pages.[2:11:34] Okay.[2:11:34] Here's Ludacris.[2:11:35] Okay.[2:11:35] That's really nice.[2:11:37] Oh, here's a big Sean.[2:11:39] And you're flipping the bucket.[2:11:40] And as the white artist, Katy Perry or Taylor Swift,[2:11:45] you don't know who any of the artists are.[2:11:47] You don't know who Ludacris is.[2:11:49] So you're sitting there going, Ludacris?[2:11:52] Oh, and then it's got their price.[2:11:54] Ludacris will give you a jovial verse sure to get the crowd[2:11:58] jumping.[2:12:01] Remember The Book of Knickers.[2:12:02] This is what the white pop stars use to figure out what kind of[2:12:07] black guy they're going to put on their song.[2:12:08] And this used to happen all the time.[2:12:11] You know, pop took a break from this, you know, putting these,[2:12:15] using this book, at least.[2:12:16] You remember Katy Perry would be like, who do you?[2:12:19] She picked Ice Spice because she foresaw Mads' comments[2:12:24] insulting Ice Spice.[2:12:25] Of course.[2:12:26] Of course.[2:12:27] Listen to this verse.[2:12:30] Here it is.[2:12:40] Look at her face.[2:12:44] Look at this shithead face.[2:12:48] Wait till you see this chard.[2:12:52] Watch.[2:13:02] Oh, that drives me nuts.[2:13:04] And if you're a man and this just drives you nuts and you[2:13:06] don't get it, you're absolutely right.[2:13:08] This is, this is everything that's wrong with the whole[2:13:11] world.[2:13:12] And this is why the one side is hating the other side, because[2:13:15] this is too far.[2:13:17] Now I, on the other hand can tolerate, I could interact it[2:13:20] with all, you know, with all of it, like a normal human being,[2:13:23] not out there tearing it down.[2:13:27] I'm not actually out there, you know, grabbing her by that poof,[2:13:30] which was a clown.[2:13:32] By the way, that's a clown's wig.[2:13:34] It used to be just a shitty, weird, creepy, cringe clown[2:13:37] wig.[2:13:38] Now that's the coolest rapper's hair.[2:13:41] You don't like ice spice.[2:13:44] She's had three songs.[2:13:45] They're all just a joke.[2:13:48] And you like that you could laugh at a black retard because[2:13:51] it's so cringe and it's so stupid sounding.[2:13:54] Get it?[2:13:55] Listen to this.[2:13:55] Taylor ruined her album.[2:14:08] That's like, it's technically people I see she's technical.[2:14:16] That's all you ask for now.[2:14:18] Technically, but number, number, not better.[2:14:22] That to them is like a crazy, like twisted verse of today's[2:14:28] day and age.[2:14:29] When this part happened, people were like, Oh, she's amazing.[2:14:32] She's not amazing.[2:14:33] Has it gotten that bad where this is amazing now?[2:14:36] Where are the swears?[2:14:38] Rap was, is supposed to have swears in it, guys.[2:14:42] Every other word should be a swear.[2:14:45] If not, it's not rap.[2:14:46] Not in a Taylor song.[2:14:48] This is crap.[2:14:50] C-Rap.[2:14:53] Just thought of that one.[2:14:54] You ain't gotta worry, karma never gets crazy.[2:14:57] So I keep my head up, I won't let up, promise that you'll never[2:15:00] endeavor with none less, ever, ever, I'll be dragging that wagon.[2:15:04] Karma is a beauty, winning that pageant.[2:15:08] Winning that pageant.[2:15:10] No, listen to this.[2:15:12] You've probably filled in your head, filled this in.[2:15:15] Have you ever heard of a rapper?[2:15:17] Here's how you know when somebody's so dumb and they're, they don't[2:15:19] deserve to be here and they're going to be here and they're going to be[2:15:21] Here's how you know when somebody's so dumb and they're, they don't[2:15:23] deserve to be here and they're going to be gone and everybody's wrong.[2:15:26] Here's how you know when everybody's wrong.[2:15:28] When there's a rapper who doesn't finish the verse.[2:15:33] And it's amazing how many rap songs, how many verses out there, especially[2:15:39] in pop on the radio, where they just like run out of, they just don't[2:15:45] finish their verse, this is an example.[2:15:48] Listen to this.[2:15:48] The whole verse is going.[2:15:50] There's supposed to be a whole nother line, but these are stall.[2:15:55] People would do the amigos do this future does this, you know, it[2:16:00] happens so often in rep that I thought it was a stylistic choice, but no,[2:16:05] this is just retardation and white guilt run wild where the white producers[2:16:10] are like, shouldn't there be one more line of this verse to like lead it[2:16:13] into the chorus, like it's got it.[2:16:16] You got to finish it.[2:16:18] I'll show you it.[2:16:18] Watch it.[2:16:20] It's a beauty winning that pageant.[2:16:24] It should win at that pageant, da, da, da, da, da, but it just goes winning[2:16:30] that pageant and then into the core.[2:16:33] I mean, listen to this again.[2:16:40] You'll see this is very weird.[2:16:42] And she never leaving you alone.[2:16:44] Watch her put your apps on a throne.[2:16:47] Sorry, Johnny.[2:16:48] Roll.[2:16:48] We'll get to you in a second.[2:16:50] It'll save you switching up your behavior.[2:16:53] It's okay.[2:16:54] You ain't got to worry.[2:16:55] Karma never gets lazy.[2:16:57] So I keep my head up.[2:16:58] My brother, I'll be dragging that wagon.[2:17:04] Karma is a beauty winning that pageant.[2:17:11] And Taylor's like, Oh yeah, that's perfect.[2:17:14] That's perfect.[2:17:15] You're so scared.[2:17:16] You know, you could go, Oh, you, you forgot to do one part.[2:17:19] No, I didn't.[2:17:21] What do you mean?[2:17:22] I finished starting the conversation.[2:17:25] Yeah.[2:17:25] It's like, yeah, it's not worth getting into because both of them,[2:17:29] so you just awkwardly release that.[2:17:33] And then you want everyone to second guess that in their head.[2:17:36] And they go, Oh, I shouldn't even ask.[2:17:37] Cause nobody ever has.[2:17:39] I'm the first person to bring this up in music ever.[2:17:44] That's how you're just like, I don't, I don't even know.[2:17:47] Like you're all second guessing yourself as if, Oh, that's just a style.[2:17:54] So I spice needs to go.[2:17:56] I'll do whatever it takes to take her out of this world.[2:18:00] Whether it's physically, whether it's paid off, whether it's illegal or legal,[2:18:04] let's get her out of here.[2:18:05] He doesn't mean it.[2:18:05] We just watched John Wick.[2:18:07] Just watch John Wick and in John Wick, you could do all those things.[2:18:11] Whatever you want.[2:18:11] I'm part of the criminal compound.[2:18:13] So, uh,[2:18:18] yes, Trump said, I spice. That's all you need to know about ice spice.[2:18:21] Please be against her. Now, jelly roll is watching this.[2:18:24] I love ice spice for the first time. So good. Got the message out. Oh,[2:18:28] believe me. You're hearing about her. Trust me.[2:18:30] You've been blocking it out for three months is what you've been doing.[2:18:34] You've been hearing about it. You heard the word I spice every week.[2:18:37] You just thought it was someone else. You didn't know.[2:18:40] You didn't have time to know like Trump.[2:18:43] I spice. She's great. I'm sure she's great.[2:18:49] That's shame on you, Taylor. Shame on you so bad.[2:18:53] And that's why you're 33. Now no boyfriend grow up and get a[2:18:57] boyfriend already. Okay. Vy Vance.[2:19:01] She's on Vy Vance up there every night. I just love life so much.[2:19:07] This is my 59th night in a row doing a four hour[2:19:11] concert and I couldn't be happier. Okay.[2:19:16] Take another Vy Vance and get back in the chamber in the box.[2:19:19] She's figuring it all out. This is how she gets to,[2:19:22] this is her on stage of the concert.[2:19:24] Then they put her in a physical box and roll her away to God knows where.[2:19:28] And she comes back smiling, drooling.[2:19:31] I just love singing my songs 6,000 times in a row.[2:19:35] What would be weird about that? I don't want to kill myself at all.[2:19:40] Now here's another song with GDE.[2:19:46] Take another Vy Vance. She would have been happy with Maddie,[2:19:49] but you guys ruined it. You know, back in the day,[2:19:53] if you would have said like you could back in the day, you could say,[2:19:57] you couldn't say something like,[2:19:58] I bet Kanye West will turn into a full Nazi and[2:20:03] everything he has will be taken from him. And then he'll quit music.[2:20:08] People go, Oh yeah. Nice fantasy. Taylor Swift.[2:20:12] Now, you know, these fantasies come true. I mean,[2:20:15] every day you hear something just incredible that where 10 years ago,[2:20:19] like if you made a, you know, any headline about Biden 10 years ago,[2:20:24] that would be like a joke parody headline, right?[2:20:27] You wouldn't be like a president Biden refers to himself as dark[2:20:32] Brandon, you know, at the, uh,[2:20:35] speech of the century, you know, back 10 years ago,[2:20:38] that would be like a thing of your wildest dreams. Right?[2:20:42] So with that in mind,[2:20:45] it's not that crazy to say Taylor Swift could turn into like the next[2:20:49] Britney Spears. After all this,[2:20:53] you can't do that much tour. It really, every day,[2:20:56] I can't sleep because she's making me watch the tour every day on[2:21:01] uh, uh, tech talk live streams of the tour.[2:21:04] Just going to check in. She's up there every night. This has been going on.[2:21:08] I think about, we went to the first tour. So that was six months ago already.[2:21:12] So I've had like this whole life. And meanwhile,[2:21:15] she's been doing the same day on repeat for the last six months.[2:21:20] You know how many times I've been like sick during that or gone through life[2:21:23] changes grown as a big things have happened to me.[2:21:28] And she's still half, she's only halfway through her tour.[2:21:33] She's putting in. And when I see her do that work, I go,[2:21:36] what kind of shots are they giving them? Because I see the tour and I like,[2:21:41] cringe at how awful it would feel to have to go[2:21:46] do a four hour dancing and performing your heart out[2:21:51] every night.[2:21:53] And then I started thinking about how bad I feel that I don't have access to[2:21:57] that type of energy. Why can't I do that?[2:22:02] Is it, it has to be Vyvanse, right? It has to be Adderall. It's the only way.[2:22:07] I refuse to take it[2:22:11] outside of recreational situations.[2:22:16] You saw what it did to Steven Crowder.[2:22:18] You saw what Adderall did to Brianna chicken fry from BFFs.[2:22:24] Adderall's gonna hold you down.[2:22:27] I think she just has that natural power.[2:22:29] I don't like it. It makes me uneasy though. It makes me feel disgusting.[2:22:33] Don't compare yourself to others.[2:22:37] And also you forgot the best thing.[2:22:38] I don't compare myself to ice spice.[2:22:43] I was going to say, you forgot the best thing about ice spice is her real name.[2:22:46] What is her real name? Remember? No, I don't remember.[2:22:51] Oh my God. I'm not kidding. Ice spice is real name.[2:22:56] It's Isis. Why?[2:22:59] Isis?[2:23:01] Your name is Isis. Okay.[2:23:06] Her name is Isis. Remember 9-11?[2:23:11] Remember the follow through of 9-11? Remember the guys, the terrorists?[2:23:15] I remember, uh,[2:23:17] it was so you could call people who looked like a terrorist, a terrorist.[2:23:22] There used to be a time. I, uh,[2:23:25] I thought back to that just last night,[2:23:28] I was having this all night vision memory of myself when I went to[2:23:32] London and we threw a giant party at an Airbnb[2:23:38] in this beautiful part of London. It was right by the, uh, the castle.[2:23:43] In fact, just a couple blocks down from the castle with the beautiful Airbnb.[2:23:48] We throw an all night rager, hundreds of people,[2:23:53] places destroyed, noise complaints from everywhere.[2:23:56] And we really tore this place apart. We go to sleep.[2:24:00] We wake up at about 11 AM the next day,[2:24:04] three middle Eastern guys,[2:24:07] the owners three middle Eastern like money schemey,[2:24:13] like John Wick villain type guys,[2:24:16] the owners let themselves in the Airbnb where we're[2:24:21] all, we just went to sleep from the drugs.[2:24:25] Ketamine, coke, ecstasy.[2:24:30] You know, I was in the deepest sleep of my life at 1130 AM the next[2:24:35] day, just getting to bed and they break in and they start screaming at all of[2:24:40] us, everybody out of their rooms, screaming about the party,[2:24:44] three middle Eastern men in scarves, but rich,[2:24:47] like those London, rich middle Eastern guys. And, uh,[2:24:52] they threw us out of the Airbnb,[2:24:53] but not without a very weird drug hangover rant for me where I called them[2:25:02] terrorists. I go, you are no different than Tara.[2:25:06] Look at you, you look like Tara.[2:25:10] And I'm doing this whole rant on them. Remember,[2:25:13] I just got off doing for the first time in my life, drinking all night,[2:25:18] after I was drunk at my drunkest,[2:25:21] took lines and lines of ketamine lines and lines of Coke[2:25:27] ecstasy. Then did the drug ecstasy after doing all that[2:25:32] for the first time.[2:25:34] So I'm experiencing a whole new world. You know, it's 1130 AM the next day.[2:25:39] I just did all those drugs and I've never done them before.[2:25:43] So I call them terrorists,[2:25:45] which in London is against the hate crime laws.[2:25:52] And they immediately stopped in their tracks and go, Oh,[2:25:57] call the police, call the police. I go, why, what do you mean call the police?[2:26:02] Now? Now I'm unsure of this whole rant that I want. What do you mean?[2:26:07] And then they're like, you're just committed hate crime, my friend.[2:26:10] Oh, good luck. I don't remember what happened.[2:26:15] We agreed to clean the place up and then, but the police came.[2:26:18] Is this the same guy who had the ants? Nope. Different guy.[2:26:23] Police came, police came and I'm talking to the police about an hour later.[2:26:29] And, uh, he goes, so bit of a discrepancy.[2:26:33] And they're so nice. These British police, but for discrepancy, uh, we're,[2:26:37] you know, there's the man called, there was a problem at the rental, uh,[2:26:42] but he said this morning, do you use some racism towards him?[2:26:46] Called him a terrorist. I go, no, no, no. It is a big misunderstanding.[2:26:50] I said, I was so mad about the fight we were in. I was like,[2:26:53] you're a terrible guy. Terrible.[2:26:58] And when he heard me say Tara, he instantly thinks I'm seeing terrorists.[2:27:02] We would never, and the police bought that story.[2:27:07] And they go, Oh, very easy to mistake. Okay.[2:27:11] How about you just separate? And, uh, you know, we're good.[2:27:15] And then they let both of us go and we were fine and got out of the whole thing.[2:27:20] We, I think we had to, no,[2:27:22] I think we even were able to stay at that very Airbnb.[2:27:26] They let you stay. I don't remember, but I think,[2:27:29] I think we only had one more day left and, and they let us stay.[2:27:34] Maybe not. Um,[2:27:38] but, uh, yeah. So I think of,[2:27:43] uh, it was something about terrorists. Who,[2:27:46] who was I calling a terrorist before this?[2:27:48] Probably ice spice.[2:27:50] Isis ice spice. Yeah. Her name is Isis.[2:27:55] And we're just all supposed to be okay with that. We got it. I got,[2:27:59] I would love to go back to that,[2:28:01] those days where we were all anti-terrorist together. That to me,[2:28:04] I still haven't bought into that one. I'm on a whole,[2:28:07] I'm so separated from that whole argument that I still think, Oh yeah,[2:28:10] you're allowed to hate Muslim people for all that.[2:28:14] But apparently that's a big thing now too, with Mandy Healy.[2:28:17] He's made some remarks about the Muslim people,[2:28:20] which is still like a big BBC deal over in the BBC world.[2:28:24] They're still having that argument from like three years ago where we're like,[2:28:27] we can't be mean to, uh, not foreigners. What do they call them? Refugees,[2:28:32] refugees. Oh,[2:28:35] you know how that was kind of like a big stink three years ago,[2:28:37] you heard like a lot of anti-Muslim stuff. I want to be back into that.[2:28:43] I skipped that whole one too. I skipped that whole one.[2:28:47] So I'm in on that one. That one is,[2:28:49] we should go reflect on big incidents we've had as people and go,[2:28:54] Hey, remember when we were all like against refugees and they're like,[2:28:57] you can't be, maybe we look back on that and yes,[2:29:01] let's be against refugees, uh, for the final decision.[2:29:05] I liked that idea. I don't like those Muslims. No, none of them.[2:29:10] They're all, not even Andrew Tate. No, they're all shady.[2:29:14] Have you ever met a Muslim that wasn't at the very least just really shady and[2:29:19] schemy? Not my cup of tea. And I am not part of that religion.[2:29:24] I am simply Greek. So if people want to, Oh, well, but what are you?[2:29:29] You look like some sort of terrorist. Well, let's hope not.[2:29:33] And also I am just a Greek,[2:29:36] just like a Jesse from full house.[2:29:39] I'm that kind of a guy. Greek. If anyone asks, Oh,[2:29:44] he's Greek. He's one of the big Greeks too.[2:29:47] Like he's very popular in Greek and Greece. Thank you. Okay.[2:29:51] So we're going to show you this jelly roll submits.[2:29:55] Get some of his new album on in the background.[2:29:58] Mr. Roll.[2:29:58] Sorry about that. Jelly roll and what's his real name.[2:30:01] We barely learned his real name through his documentary,[2:30:04] which we're about to show you, but he just called him jelly roll.[2:30:07] I think his name is like Jeremy or Jason or something like that,[2:30:12] but, uh, it's amazing. Jelly roll has a whole tour documentary.[2:30:15] You're welcome to watch it. It's on Hulu. It's one of these[2:30:22] jelly roll. Here he comes.[2:30:24] It's one of these, uh,[2:30:25] pathetic sad docs about how he came from nothing and he wants to[2:30:30] help a bunch of pieces of shit feel good about themselves.[2:30:36] And it was just over and over again, how he came from nothing.[2:30:40] And now he's just so happy to be here.[2:30:44] Jelly roll. We're going to make fun of your stupid little thing.[2:30:48] Across my face. I'm a tornado.[2:30:53] It's on my halo.[2:31:03] We listened to the album this morning, uninventive cliche,[2:31:08] radio is stick is stick. And you know, there's jelly.[2:31:12] Cause he was worried about this,[2:31:13] the whole documentary is so worried about releasing this album. You know,[2:31:17] he's hired three writers to help them write the songs writers that he doesn't[2:31:21] know from Adam. They come over, they did most of the work.[2:31:25] And as you can hear here,[2:31:27] doesn't this sound like you're listening to it on the radio as we speak? Listen,[2:31:32] it has a radio compression to it right off the[2:31:38] lossless. Cheers to jelly roll.[2:31:44] And we thought he liked wrapped or something.[2:31:47] Can't you hear this on,[2:31:52] in all those shitty stores, maybe not,[2:31:56] but this is a radio song of wait.[2:31:58] So you see his audience who we're going to dunk on today in a disgusting,[2:32:05] uh,[2:32:05] nobody's ever done something like this where you look at a crowd of under[2:32:09] privileged people who are all getting together,[2:32:11] pretending this is such a positive thing for jelly roll.[2:32:14] We're just going to dunk on their value,[2:32:18] lack thereof, and how shitty they're doing as a community,[2:32:22] which no one does watch it. Let's open his doc.[2:32:27] So yeah, this was the video jelly roll submits to Joe Rogan. And it was,[2:32:31] God knows what was in this clip, right? That he saw.[2:32:36] So you go to the YouTube comments, look at this.[2:32:40] And then I will put him out for you right now.[2:32:42] Let's go to the YouTube comments and see what he saw.[2:32:44] Now I know it just disappeared for me. Here we go. So here's the video.[2:32:48] Jelly roll submits to Joe Rogan.[2:32:49] It looks like it got up to 18 K views in three days. Pretty viral.[2:32:55] And the top comment right here is jelly roll.[2:33:02] Good content, brother. Love it. Can't wait to hang.[2:33:11] So we've now been threatened.[2:33:14] By jelly roll. He thinks he's gonna, you know,[2:33:17] and nobody's doing this to know jelly roll right now,[2:33:20] all he's getting is bullshit praise.[2:33:22] Everyone's really been fooled by this guy.[2:33:24] So imagine the things I must've said in this video and here jelly roll[2:33:29] is, and it's again, this is the day his album was released.[2:33:34] He's on YouTube watching hater videos, you know,[2:33:39] and who could look away? Imagine a hater video done this well, you know,[2:33:43] this red bar and you saw the thumbnail there. How nice that looked. Right.[2:33:47] So imagine your jelly roll. You just see this, uh,[2:33:50] jelly roll submits to Joe Rogan. It's got 18 K views.[2:33:54] By the time you get there, that's big enough to think it's a thing.[2:33:58] As a jelly roll, you look at 18 K you go, this is real. It's a real studio,[2:34:02] real lighting. I told you this studio was going to trick people,[2:34:07] you know, gets them to respond more. This studio, they think that it, you know,[2:34:12] more important than it is. Right. They get scared.[2:34:15] I don't know what you think you're going to do when you're in a hallway and Joey[2:34:19] Diaz is chasing you from one end and jelly roll is chasing you from the other[2:34:24] end. You're not going to be able to escape.[2:34:26] Or just cause I would go to, Oh nope. Melting.[2:34:31] I've got the biggest fattest fucking guys coming after me. I've got, you know,[2:34:35] the biggest fattest guys in the world are after me. Jelly roll,[2:34:39] Joey and jelly roll and Joey Diaz are friends.[2:34:42] Oh yeah. Can you imagine them finding out about this?[2:34:46] He's terrible. Oh God. Stay away from him. He's just terrible. Yep.[2:34:51] You're dead all around.[2:34:55] I just think it's hell. No, you don't think it's hilarious.[2:35:00] Okay. This ruined your whole day. And believe me,[2:35:02] you shouldn't have been watching this on CD release day.[2:35:05] Ah, good content, brother. Love it.[2:35:09] Cause he thinks this is me. It's another guy, you know,[2:35:11] how good is jelly roll at the internet anyway? You know,[2:35:14] he's trying to pretend he's like an internet guy. He knows about the net, huh?[2:35:19] You're talking. If you're talking to a clip channel, you're an out of it. Boom.[2:35:23] You know who did that? Uh, that was, uh,[2:35:25] who did we have last week that did that? Talking to the clip channel.[2:35:29] That's like an old man boomer, Jim Brewer.[2:35:32] When you start talking to the clip channel as if it's a real person,[2:35:37] that's when you know, you've gotten, you know,[2:35:42] that should be like a meme, right? That should be a thing up. Old man, uh,[2:35:46] talking to the clip channel.[2:35:48] There's also a scene of him seeing this video or, uh,[2:35:53] yes, of course we'll have that coming up. Uh, but look at this good content,[2:35:57] brother. Love it. Can't wait to hang.[2:36:00] You thought that was going to scare me because it does[2:36:07] after seeing his documentary. I can't believe it.[2:36:11] And this is almost as big as Joey Diaz doing the death threat to me.[2:36:15] I didn't know how big jelly roll was. Let's roll some footage from his doc.[2:36:20] And now you'll see how crazy and furthermore, how cool[2:36:25] this jelly roll stuff. And this is, I'm telling you,[2:36:28] the second jelly roll popped up on Rogan.[2:36:31] I was watching it in fantasizing about this exact situation.[2:36:37] I go and I'm seeing jolly rolls face for the first time. I mean,[2:36:40] it was three seconds into the Rogan episode. I'm looking at jolly roll and I'm[2:36:43] going, me and jelly roll are going to have a future together.[2:36:48] And I saw it all happen. I saw the anger, the confusion,[2:36:53] the back and forth, but it was a fantasy.[2:36:57] It was just a fantasy. It was,[2:37:00] but it happened and that was the first thing that happened. I mean,[2:37:03] that was the first, when I saw jelly roll,[2:37:06] I go I'm getting involved in jelly roll and I can't,[2:37:09] I know he's going to come knocking. I know he's going to come knocking.[2:37:13] I know this is going to throw him for a mental hoop.[2:37:19] It's just going to make him curious. And he's the type of guy.[2:37:22] I knew he was the type of guy who no matter how much success,[2:37:24] no matter how many people told him that they love him and he changed their life[2:37:29] today,[2:37:29] he's going to focus on the one guy and then you see this asshole,[2:37:33] this fucking Jewish cretin in a wheelchair sitting here,[2:37:37] gat cackling it up. Meanwhile,[2:37:40] you're out there every day working your ass off, saving people,[2:37:44] going to rehab centers and talking to the dumb.[2:37:48] Don't eat. Oh, you should see this motherfucker in his documentary,[2:37:51] going to every homeless shelter in town, jelly rolls back in town,[2:37:55] helping the town's homeless.[2:37:59] That's how you help the home is you spit in their food,[2:38:02] kick it over into the dirt where it's impossible to get it out of.[2:38:07] But you're out there helping the homeless. He's going back to his old community.[2:38:10] Wait till you see him in this doc.[2:38:11] He's going to a drug rehab center like the fucking back rooms rehab[2:38:16] center. Great place to cool out after getting off drugs.[2:38:20] Yeah. And a bright fluorescent office building, you know,[2:38:26] and he's in there, he's telling his story. He's bringing up to people's hopes.[2:38:30] He's making the people feel, you know, if I can make it, you know,[2:38:34] you can not make it. Wait till you see this audience. We are going to,[2:38:37] and let me guess, jelly roll, man,[2:38:41] you could say whatever you want about me,[2:38:44] but going after my audience of kind, that's exactly what we're doing.[2:38:49] We're going after the weakest,[2:38:53] most innocent of your audience. Wait till you see these people.[2:38:58] His whole audience is a bunch of poor people who think that maybe they'll win[2:39:03] the lottery, a bunch of lottery plan, Roseanne,[2:39:08] Connor, uh, Landford, Illinois,[2:39:12] looking people, you know, it could be the middle of summer.[2:39:15] They were all wearing the Walmart version of everything Carhartt makes.[2:39:19] Yeah.[2:39:22] You know, their faces,[2:39:26] you shouldn't see these beautiful, brutal factory people.[2:39:31] I mean, really, and it really reminds you how much of a shithole this country[2:39:36] is and how disgusting most people are. You're disgusted by India. So am I,[2:39:42] but half this country is just as gross as your worst shit eating[2:39:46] Indian tree leafer.[2:39:49] Wait till you see jelly rolls, fucking content. Uh, and again,[2:39:54] this is so out of line what I'm doing[2:39:59] here and so low and distasteful.[2:40:04] It's exactly what, you know, you don't need this shit.[2:40:09] Wait till you see how I treat,[2:40:12] how low I go here for what I got to start[2:40:17] my free trial or log in. Do we have a passcode here on messages?[2:40:20] Is this shit here?[2:40:21] If you don't have it.[2:40:22] Somebody save me,[2:40:27] me from myself.[2:40:31] I spent so long living.[2:40:36] See, and if I was actually fat, that would sound just as good as him.[2:40:41] Sometimes I'm scared,[2:40:45] scared of myself.[2:40:58] I love these problems.[2:41:03] Myself and I don't understand.[2:41:09] I love these problems.[2:41:11] I saw some man in stone living here.[2:41:22] All right. This passcode isn't working.[2:41:24] I was trying to buy time while trying to enter here.[2:41:26] There's nothing letting me in. Yeah. I'm copying and pasting everything.[2:41:29] Try using my email instead. Sorry guys.[2:41:34] So this jelly roll, I'm going to be a real pain in his paw,[2:41:39] but also we're like, uh, friends,[2:41:41] this is very reminiscent of every white trash person's favorite movie.[2:41:45] John wick four. So you must understand.[2:41:48] We're going to act like John wick guys together. Okay.[2:41:52] We've got a mutual respect for each other,[2:41:54] but we're here to hurt each other very badly. Did that's how, yes, I'm in.[2:42:00] What time should I go first? 1330. Sure. What do you mean? Sure.[2:42:05] You said like, uh, sure. No.[2:42:07] Sure. Did you hear that guys? What time did I go?[2:42:12] 13 I I'm like so excited by it. And then she's like, sure.[2:42:17] I was just deciding if that was the best code.[2:42:22] This Dasha, Napra,[2:42:23] COVA is such a bad example or about bad role model for jewel.[2:42:29] Okay. Let's just show them the opening here again.[2:42:33] I had no idea how great I knew though. I knew jelly roll was going to be it.[2:42:37] And we just, by the way, we just introduced him to you guys last show.[2:42:42] So yeah, if you're new to this, just let it all at all. Uh,[2:42:47] it'll all come together very soon. Watch. Here's jelly roll.[2:42:52] This is an ABC news studios production. This is his beta is when,[2:42:57] uh, when, uh, what's his name?[2:43:02] Just did the BBC interview. Tate. We tell y'all somebody told too many people.[2:43:08] Movie time. Some days I'll wake up and wonder if I'm even doing the right thing,[2:43:11] man. Some days I just wonder, dude, am I really chasing the dream here?[2:43:15] Am I just running from the inevitable?[2:43:20] I like cycle. Okay. Here he is. This is the big tour document.[2:43:23] So much history in this room for me. This is a Hulu original,[2:43:26] like a big meal place on earth.[2:43:28] That'll be more special than playing your hometown arena ever.[2:43:32] I wanted to lower the lights. Oh, wait, dude.[2:43:34] I'm petrified to do this show tonight.[2:43:37] I've always struggled with self-worth and value[2:43:42] and feeling like you belong places. You know,[2:43:48] I've been to jail 40 times in my life. You hear this shit.[2:43:52] I never made it out of the ninth grade.[2:43:54] I'm really a street kid that had absolutely nothing going for them.[2:44:00] To me, life was about climbing mountains.[2:44:02] They said we were too fat to be in the music business.[2:44:04] They told me that my voice wasn't cool enough.[2:44:06] They told me I didn't have an image.[2:44:07] It would never fit in country music or any genre.[2:44:12] You know, these are all to me as mountains.[2:44:14] Whatever we had to just watch this conquer.[2:44:19] Zach Amico.[2:44:22] Look at the show. She does look at the stadium.[2:44:24] She rocks. These are all the people. Watch it.[2:44:26] Let's get ready to rumble.[2:44:29] How unique. How unique.[2:44:33] I think what we're going to deal with is an asshole jelly roll.[2:44:35] I got to get that guy from the boxing masters to talk.[2:44:39] Nobody's ever done that before. People won't believe it.[2:44:43] Let's get ready to see jelly roll.[2:44:48] Now, how many times are we going to be fake impressed by that?[2:44:52] He just said that he was in jail 40 times, but did he say 40 or four?[2:44:57] I swear he said 40 and everyone in the chat is going 40. Oh, okay. Yeah.[2:45:01] He's been to jail 40 times, but he's got,[2:45:05] he's like uncle Joey, the story of his life.[2:45:07] He only talks about two times he was in jail. So what's up with that.[2:45:11] You think if you were there 40, I know I'd have more to say. I don't know.[2:45:15] I don't know how much of this is true. You know,[2:45:19] we'll have to find out. Let's see a little bit more.[2:45:21] I'll show you the type of people who go to the jelly roll shows.[2:45:24] You're going to feel really bad about this segment here. Nashville, Tennessee.[2:45:30] Let's get ready to rumble.[2:45:35] I think what we're going to deal with tonight is what do they call them in a[2:45:39] movable force meets an unstoppable object. This is a collision course.[2:45:45] This is destiny.[2:45:55] Jelly roll. Save me. You guys got to see this doc too.[2:45:59] If you want a really dreary Sunday,[2:46:02] it was drear to drear to drear to drear.[2:46:07] It never got fun.[2:46:11] I just want to show you this, this opening. So you get the vibe.[2:46:18] I'm searching for a whole stadium. They know his music.[2:46:24] I'm up against this guy.[2:46:28] They're crying. Okay.[2:46:31] Here is a nice shot of the crowd. Let's see if we could see them here. Sorry.[2:46:35] I'm using my, uh, James. What is that guy's name? James. James Charles.[2:46:40] James Charles got me this fan for my birthday. So his audience,[2:46:45] you know, they all look like, I, where else have you seen like a, uh,[2:46:48] a group of people that's bad.[2:46:50] Where else have you seen a group of people get like this together?[2:46:53] You see what I mean? They're all wearing like coats.[2:46:56] They're all like those dirt poor Indiana people[2:47:01] living in those dirt,[2:47:02] poor like every one of them has a dead boyfriend or a dead kid.[2:47:07] My kid was taken from me just like we, but also this isn't Denver.[2:47:11] So aren't people from Denver. It doesn't matter where he goes.[2:47:14] His crowd always looks like he's performing at a factory[2:47:20] for the factory workers who are all on parole.[2:47:24] Like every one of them has lost a family member to drugs.[2:47:28] When drugs came in, no, I sure took my family by storm.[2:47:34] It's all those types of people.[2:47:36] I'm so sick of this type of person and I never get to really pick on them.[2:47:41] They're so putrid. They're so gross here.[2:47:44] I'll show you some closeups of them coming up.[2:47:50] They all look, yeah, like malnourished. They all look deformed.[2:47:54] Skip ahead to like 1330 down.[2:47:57] I just started really, I just wanted to hear his speech.[2:48:00] So I'm still not comfortable singing.[2:48:03] Just like a scared child when I have to sing.[2:48:07] And I just sing good because I just sing from the stomach.[2:48:11] Maybe that's the magic to it though.[2:48:12] Maybe I'm a decent singer because I don't know he's got it all. He's,[2:48:15] he's so ready. He's been ready his whole life to do this, to talk like this,[2:48:19] to pace out, to set this type of tone.[2:48:22] He's more interested in the tone of this[2:48:27] sentimental bull than he is in the tone of his guitar.[2:48:32] Because Jolly Roll, you know, that new album,[2:48:35] you were sitting home worrying about the response to the new album.[2:48:38] Your worries were right. Did you see the idol?[2:48:41] Remember when Jocelyn, spoiler alert, Jocelyn doesn't like the new song,[2:48:46] but her team keeps telling her, Oh no, this is going to be great.[2:48:49] She knows it's cringe. It's in her head. She can't,[2:48:53] she can't deal with it because she's doing something. You know,[2:48:56] she knows it's cheap. She knows it's bad.[2:48:59] Even the weekend was being creepy about that song. So yeah,[2:49:04] your album, you spent the whole day up worrying on release day. Oh man,[2:49:10] man, I can't wait to see how my loving friend that I love[2:49:15] so much. Oh, how are they going to interpret my words?[2:49:20] Will it connect with them? It didn't, it failed because you went radio.[2:49:26] You sat there with your little writers.[2:49:28] He made a song that sounded like it was already coming out of a mono speaker.[2:49:33] It's some store, a song that sounds like it's in, in,[2:49:37] on an Uber. I'm in the Uber. I'm in the store.[2:49:41] It's two years of you. It's Creed.[2:49:44] You sound like swamp water Creed stuff from 2012.[2:49:50] Remember when, uh, uh, on the radio, every time you turn on the radio,[2:49:54] it was like one day I can maybe be your[2:49:59] Superman. I shot a man up in the van.[2:50:05] What's that song? How does that go?[2:50:08] If I go crazy, will you call me Superman?[2:50:14] That's the type of vibe you bring to the radio, bro.[2:50:18] That era of music. And yes, Creed was probably around.[2:50:25] You, you, I listened to your album. It's everything you worried about.[2:50:30] So we got to start over and I'll tell you this jelly roll.[2:50:33] I'm willing to help you. Yup.[2:50:38] Bring me on board as your resident.[2:50:42] I think you guys could write some songs together.[2:50:44] I would like to write a song. You said we'll hang soon.[2:50:47] You said we'll hang soon. Let's hang. Let's write a song,[2:50:51] but I'm in charge of the lyrics this time.[2:50:55] Okay.[2:50:56] You could be in charge of rallying up the deformed retards from[2:51:00] Indianapolis, you know,[2:51:02] cause they need your music to get through their seventh son,[2:51:05] choking on drugs and dying in their arms[2:51:10] in their shitty, uh,[2:51:12] broken down crap house filled with junk. Okay.[2:51:17] Uh, let's go to 1330. You're going to love this.[2:51:22] And I just can't tell you enough, but it really is the people.[2:51:25] I like jelly roll. I don't like his audience. I don't like those kids.[2:51:29] Those sick kids that listen to his music. Uh, 1330.[2:51:33] Wait till you see this shit here. Yeah.[2:51:41] We're going to get some closeups to these people.[2:51:43] That's the most tickets we sold to a jelly roll show in the United[2:51:47] States of America.[2:51:51] I'll wait till the clear for the[2:51:56] ticket. I thank you for waiting in line.[2:51:58] I thank you for coming on a fucking Sunday night.[2:52:01] I thank you for walking up that fucking Hill.[2:52:06] She saw you. Oh, she, she saw me. Look at this. This is the audience.[2:52:12] Her you've seen a woman like this. You ever been to a Walmart? Maybe[2:52:17] that's too easy. This is like a Costco.[2:52:22] Look at this one. These people can't afford Costco.[2:52:24] And I'm against that type of person. So look at the audience[2:52:30] and what happened.[2:52:31] So the whole white trash community is like run by these fat women.[2:52:34] Now like this is what like every white trash city looks[2:52:39] like just millions and millions of these angry[2:52:43] slob women get this white trash piece of shit.[2:52:49] Look at this guy. And we live in Arizona.[2:52:50] So we're allowed to speak on the white trash. I mean, this guy,[2:52:55] there's probably a guy like this listening to our show right now,[2:52:57] thinking that I was on like his side this whole time. Nope.[2:53:01] Look at this guy back here. They're all in there.[2:53:05] I stole my coat from the lost and found coat.[2:53:09] They all look like they robbed a kid's school to find starter jackets to wear.[2:53:14] And they're all wearing like, you'd think, Oh yeah, these people,[2:53:17] like if you were making a movie about these people,[2:53:19] you would dress them in like cool Carhartt and stuff. No,[2:53:22] they're wearing,[2:53:24] but I was just about to say my style is a girl wearing a flat[2:53:29] brimmed hat.[2:53:30] Yes. Like this, you know,[2:53:31] if a movie really wants to emulate the white trash correctly,[2:53:36] you got to put them in a bunch of promo merchandise that like came free while[2:53:40] waiting for the radio station or something.[2:53:44] This is his audience. And yeah, I do have these people, you know,[2:53:48] his whole world revolves around these people. And like, these people like cry,[2:53:52] look at this guy,[2:53:54] all your song changed my life. Cause my brother and my mom and my kids[2:53:59] all died. Oh, congratulations.[2:54:03] Let's cry together. Isn't this beautiful? Nothing beautiful about it.[2:54:07] You're both doing something wrong.[2:54:10] And what have you learned from this eight mile?[2:54:14] You know, at least eight mile had a little rap to it. What do you have?[2:54:20] I mean, these are the people of, you know, what eight mile look like,[2:54:23] remember like the train tracks and the grittiness, imagine that kind of area.[2:54:28] And then all these people just walking around complaining[2:54:32] the Connors with their greasy hair and they eat, eat, eat,[2:54:38] keeping these people occupied. Let's see some more in one place. Yes. So,[2:54:42] okay. So that's another angle on it that I'm willing to take.[2:54:46] I'm willing to take this angle. Thank you for keeping these people busy.[2:54:51] Yes. Keeping them all in one place, keeping them out of our concerts,[2:54:55] keeping them out of our stores. And yeah,[2:55:00] I'm glad that there's a separation between these types of classes.[2:55:04] I am so glad this is my least favorite class of people.[2:55:07] This is below blacks to me. This is below trannies.[2:55:12] This is below the gays. Sorry.[2:55:14] I'd rather be in a store filled with gays than these guys.[2:55:17] If you're in a store with these guys, you're getting COVID.[2:55:20] This is how you catch COVID hanging around. People look like this.[2:55:26] They all have COVID show them here. Let's watch some more.[2:55:33] Come on, jelly.[2:55:34] We'll go down. It's one of the most special shows of my whole motherfucking life.[2:55:38] That's a good one. Look at this.[2:55:43] Look at these guys. This is, it's like worse than ice.[2:55:47] At least the juggalo's got some makeup on.[2:55:51] These are the worst of the worst people.[2:55:53] And they've all got a story of how like their boyfriend just went to jail for[2:55:56] stabbing a guy. Their stepdad is all fucked.[2:55:59] Everybody here has been fucked by 10 stepdad. You know what I mean?[2:56:03] Look at this guy.[2:56:04] You know, look at these guys.[2:56:09] It's like, I'm watching, uh, uh, uh, uh,[2:56:14] Rob Zombie movie[2:56:19] from dark till darkness. You know, what is this?[2:56:22] That guy looks exactly like Otis Firefly. You know,[2:56:27] thank God I have this mustache. If I put on like a bunch of hats,[2:56:29] I could sneak into one of these concerts. Trump.[2:56:33] So, uh, I mean, look at these people, all these Sandy eyed,[2:56:37] the hottest chick there. Yeah. You know, somebody's white dress though,[2:56:40] by their eye, their eyes are like slits because they've breathed in so much[2:56:45] break dust. Uh, these are the retards of our world.[2:56:50] I can't believe we're all in the same world with these guys. Look at this guy.[2:56:56] They're all wearing like, this is like when Joe Rogan's hunting friends come on.[2:57:00] They're all wearing those kinds of hoodies. These guys love hoodies, man.[2:57:05] I can't believe how everybody from blacks to this. Where's hoodie.[2:57:08] That poor guy back there can barely see which one is that?[2:57:13] It's okay. It's not worth it. That's okay. Look at this guy, man.[2:57:16] You have changed my life, brother. And they all call each other brother.[2:57:21] That's the new white dress thing to do.[2:57:23] I got like this Trump that target is targeting kids video.[2:57:27] It's the same type of thing. There's all these guys, brother,[2:57:30] you have changed my life, brother.[2:57:33] Why are you like kind of gangster too?[2:57:36] Why is that part of the new white trash factory people?[2:57:40] This is the Hills have eyes. Look at that.[2:57:42] And then there's always like a girl like this. I was picked on off your school.[2:57:48] And now then you have an innocent white trash.[2:57:51] Who's never going to make it, but he's a nice kid. He's a nice kid.[2:57:55] There's always a nice kid out there,[2:57:57] but really these types of people don't get picked on him with the beard is like[2:58:02] forcing him to do some kind of job thing in the city that he doesn't really want[2:58:06] to do. But they're like, come on, man. Do the right thing.[2:58:08] So it'll be a big tip in it for you. Like the movie, uh,[2:58:12] the last house on the left remake. Look at this busted ass kid.[2:58:16] Young guy of the group who who's actually nice. Yeah. It's in too deep. Yeah.[2:58:22] I was born two miles away from the train tracks and never had a choice.[2:58:27] You know, these are, this is not a good group of people,[2:58:32] but thank God they're there.[2:58:38] Look at this guy. I mean, it really, it's very Legion of Skanks. Yes.[2:58:42] It's very big J and Lewis. If they were uglier,[2:58:47] big J is like a hot version of this.[2:58:50] No, I completely,[2:58:51] I was going to say I thought I'd already seen the lowest people when I saw[2:58:56] the skank fest audience. Yeah. Yeah. I was going to say, yeah.[2:59:00] When we first saw this, we go, wow.[2:59:02] We thought the skank fest audience was the lowest that you could get.[2:59:06] Right.[2:59:08] You thought the Legion of Skanks audience was as low as people go in America.[2:59:12] No jelly roll. Apparently that guy on the,[2:59:15] then they always have some fat bitch who's like,[2:59:18] she could be a hundred percent white or 100% Latina.[2:59:21] There's a million of these,[2:59:26] a million of these getting mad at work.[2:59:29] And they all have the worst jobs all day.[2:59:32] They're going to be on their feet all day. These people are in hell.[2:59:36] They are living a hundred percent. When I see these people like, Oh Jesus, Lord,[2:59:40] thank you so much for making me Jewish.[2:59:45] These people live in a day in and day out help.[2:59:48] They all have like a really bad hip too.[2:59:50] And they got to walk all the way to work in the freezing snow just to get spit[2:59:55] on.[2:59:57] Get this, the guy on the left there at the very edge of the frame,[2:59:59] he doesn't even have an iPhone.[3:00:01] This guy. I know. Yeah. That's the type of crowd. They don't have iPhones.[3:00:05] They get whatever was like a free phone from the grocery[3:00:10] store. Look at that. What kind of phone is that?[3:00:15] Oh, that's a Google bliss.[3:00:17] But you're revealing my notes. That's a failed phone. Yeah.[3:00:20] None of these phones are iPhones. Look at this.[3:00:23] I'm going to go where I'm telling it to look at that. What kind of phone is that?[3:00:27] Kind of cockamamie plasticy phone. Let's take a closer look here.[3:00:32] I hope you listen to what I'm fixing to say.[3:00:36] This will be the most important thing I say all fucking night. Listen.[3:00:44] They love this. Let's see it live.[3:00:47] I want my life.[3:00:50] It's killing me.[3:00:51] We're going to do a whole dim lights thing for this mic are going to be at the[3:00:55] same venue soon. We can do some dissolves[3:01:02] live. It's killing it. Auto-tune though.[3:01:06] Huh? Jelly roll.[3:01:14] You got to memorize these lyrics.[3:01:18] We'll get, Oh my God. Wait, wait, wait.[3:01:21] And she sings along to my lifestyle is bad for my health.[3:01:23] That's one of my favorite parts of the day.[3:01:29] You know what that means? That's when we first watched that. I was like,[3:01:34] what are you thinking? Yeah. What are you? Yeah.[3:01:42] Roll[3:01:48] his bathroom. This is not a human being to me. I'm sorry.[3:01:53] I just want to get that straight. That's where I am in this world.[3:01:57] That's not a human being to me. That's bullshit.[3:02:02] You hear that? And meanwhile, he's hugging her after the show for what[3:02:08] she's shit. What does she do? She doesn't even help.[3:02:13] At least the Mexicans work at taco bell. These people do nothing.[3:02:16] They sit around making the world look dirty.[3:02:20] I'm glad she has a place where she can feel safe.[3:02:22] If your family member looks like that,[3:02:24] and you haven't run from your family to start a new life based on my[3:02:28] opinions, then get out of here.[3:02:33] These types of people are not welcome in my, in my view.[3:02:38] I don't want to think about these people.[3:02:42] It makes me so mad too. When I see a woman like this driving a car, you know,[3:02:46] and she's always, she's always texting, driving a big van,[3:02:51] a big gold van with taped up windows. And then this pulls up, you know,[3:02:55] we're in Tucson, Arizona. It's 120 degrees.[3:02:59] You'll know it's a woman like this because all the windows of her gold van are[3:03:03] down. There's no AC.[3:03:07] She's got her windows. A big woman like this.[3:03:10] Imagine this with all these coats stuffed in a gold van,[3:03:14] 120 degrees. She's in the car all day in the van,[3:03:18] coughing and coughing and smoking Salem's women between[3:03:23] 40 and 60 years old have a huge problem with being on their phones[3:03:28] in the car. I know they're always on their phone. It's like,[3:03:31] I don't know what kind of scheduling conflict you're in.[3:03:34] And if you're young and you're always on your phone in the car,[3:03:37] that makes sense. You know how to use a phone. You're not stupid,[3:03:40] but these old women are like swerving all over the road.[3:03:43] She'll be on two phones and she's out all day. Galavanting for why she's[3:03:48] looking right at the home. They're shopping.[3:03:53] They're shopaholics. You know, where are they going to?[3:03:59] Where are they? What are they collecting during the day of Aaron's a hundred[3:04:02] cans of pop talking to you on their phone. Just wait till you get there at the[3:04:05] supermarket.[3:04:06] The whole thing is three liters of pop piling out the cart like[3:04:11] this. And there's a cackle. And then it's like,[3:04:15] so you live in pure hell, like these people are living. I'm not kidding.[3:04:18] This is a problem. They're living like a living prison.[3:04:21] Their life is a prison. So when jelly roll sings to them,[3:04:26] we're living in hell,[3:04:29] they are living in a direct hell. So think about how good you have it at home.[3:04:34] You're sitting here watching red bar on the net.[3:04:37] If you have time to watch this show, you're rich.[3:04:40] These people don't have time to watch red bar.[3:04:42] They can't connect to something this high speed.[3:04:46] Their connectivity only goes so far. And it doesn't go to this,[3:04:50] not video broadcast. No, no, no, not a paid site.[3:04:54] So think about how good you have it. Everybody's sitting at home.[3:04:58] Imagine being this my life. I'm telling you,[3:05:01] this is like a big thing in my life right now.[3:05:04] We're not the hatred of this person,[3:05:06] but the fear of having to live life as a person[3:05:11] like this and how much I don't live life as a person,[3:05:15] anywhere near a life like that.[3:05:16] But yet these people are doing that for seven bucks a day,[3:05:21] seven bucks an hour.[3:05:22] This woman has to go through hell for seven bucks an hour.[3:05:26] And she's got to look like this and feel like,[3:05:28] imagine what she feels like that. If I'm in pain,[3:05:30] I think your empathy is coming out as discussed. There you go.[3:05:34] We must destroy them.[3:05:36] We must eradicate the world of these people. They are bringing me down there.[3:05:40] Make my biggest fear is to become something like this,[3:05:45] to actually imagine 6.00 AM.[3:05:47] You got to wake up and waddle and you're so in pain and you got to go to the[3:05:51] worst job where you just stand there bagging groceries all day.[3:05:57] And then for what? So you could come home and eat nuggets. Tyson's.[3:06:02] Can you even get Tyson or do you get to get fresh choice?[3:06:05] Or do you got to get seven 11 and they[3:06:09] love it as they cackle,[3:06:13] as they sit around and hold court talking about how great they are.[3:06:18] And they're very serious people. These people, you would think for his junkie.[3:06:22] In fact, they would just be goofballs. No. Oh, they're the most serious.[3:06:26] That's I think what I don't like.[3:06:28] These fucking homeless people are so serious. Oh,[3:06:32] everything is, you know, their stories are just dramas.[3:06:37] Get over yourself.[3:06:40] Not everything is you looking out the window on the bus during eight mile,[3:06:44] you know, what else do they have? I don't like that vibe.[3:06:47] I don't sit around looking out the window of the bus going into life.[3:06:52] You know, enough with that. You're pretending you're in a movie.[3:06:55] This is what people do. The poor people like to really,[3:06:57] they're like donkey lips. They get like over,[3:07:01] they sensationalize every little moment of their life and everything is so[3:07:04] dramatic. You've even seen Maury.[3:07:07] All these shows use people like this because they're so dramatic.[3:07:11] Just goof around. Okay. Let's see some more.[3:07:16] I hope I'm making jelly roll fucking furious. Cheers, jelly.[3:07:20] This wasn't a concert. This is a healing experience.[3:07:24] This is a healing experience. Look at this. It's an exchange.[3:07:27] Look at the code. It's not cold in there.[3:07:31] Summer.[3:07:33] They're all always dressed like this. And let me guess,[3:07:36] this guy wants target and to be destroyed.[3:07:40] You can't go to target. I'm so glad you guys are done with target. Trust me.[3:07:45] You were the only thing making that story bad.[3:07:47] They just put a new Ulta in my target.[3:07:51] I can't wait to go browse it shelves without seeing one of you guys accidentally[3:07:54] coming in thinking there's a deal. There's no deals there. It's not a discount.[3:07:59] Just shaped like a discount. There's no deals. Stay out,[3:08:04] stay out, make it expensive and in pride written.[3:08:09] Okay. A dildo in every sipper cup.[3:08:14] Keep them out. Oh, here's Jerry from succession.[3:08:17] Just getting a backstage view of the show. Look at this guy,[3:08:23] man. Jelly roll. Jelly roll. Great.[3:08:25] We forgot to make the meal fit for a King. Eric Griffin. Yep. We forgot that.[3:08:30] It's always good to tell people what we forgot to do. She's still learning.[3:08:34] I think you purposefully made me forget because you didn't want to eat the meal.[3:08:37] No, I got very sick. I got very sick five days ago.[3:08:41] And then we kind of didn't get to do a lot of the stuff we wanted to eat the[3:08:45] meal fit for a King meal fit for a King. Okay. Look at this woman.[3:08:50] She's transfixed. Okay.[3:08:53] Let's just watch a little bit more and then we'll wrap up jelly roll.[3:09:03] They're hugging. They're crying.[3:09:07] Look at that guy.[3:09:11] Last bow.[3:09:16] I really look at this as a form of church to a degree. I know the power.[3:09:20] People are all worried about their data. Yep.[3:09:24] They've got limitations on data. Okay.[3:09:29] That's like something that they go over.[3:09:35] These people, Oh God, the rebates they're involved.[3:09:39] Their whole life is just dealing with rebates and the drama that goes on when[3:09:44] you live a rabbinic life.[3:09:45] Nobody picks on this class enough.[3:09:52] Look at this as a form of church to a degree. I know the power.[3:09:59] You know, all they're doing is picking on gay people all day.[3:10:02] Yeah. There you go. Fair game. Well, no, that's not why we're doing it though.[3:10:06] Cause you can't say you want to get people on your side.[3:10:08] There's so many men on the side of this gay bashing.[3:10:12] You got to not make them suspect that we hate people like this because of that.[3:10:18] Don't even bring that up in the same context because they'll get confused. Oh,[3:10:21] this is why, this is why. No, I was just saying, can't be like, Oh my God,[3:10:26] these people are so nice and innocent.[3:10:28] Let's be nice to them because they're not anymore.[3:10:31] Well, according to you Jules, I mean,[3:10:33] they're doing what's right for the kids according to most sane people. So yeah.[3:10:38] Okay. You gotta be very clear,[3:10:41] indirect with this because people will go, well, no,[3:10:45] cause that's what everybody else would do.[3:10:47] Anybody that picks on a redneck now is a left liberal guy, right?[3:10:52] You know, I didn't mean in that show.[3:10:53] We can't have people thinking that and I'm not being sarcastic here either.[3:10:59] We're picking on them because of their worth and value.[3:11:03] We're picking on them because they're poor.[3:11:07] I'm anti poor people this level.[3:11:11] Sorry.[3:11:15] Get some luck.[3:11:18] I don't say get to work. I don't say get to work. I go,[3:11:22] start crossing your fingers. Get some fucking luck.[3:11:28] Beju.[3:11:30] Losers. Unlucky losers. What? You can't do this.[3:11:34] Your finger's too fat to cross them.[3:11:36] You go like this.[3:11:39] I hope I don't have to get up and work at, uh,[3:11:44] the back of the gas station. Oh, you didn't try that.[3:11:47] Cause I did every day of my life.[3:11:51] It's called crossing fingers, knocking on wood,[3:11:54] not wanting to work at the gas station. And it's not even the gas dish.[3:11:58] And it's like, they're working at places worse than the gas dish.[3:12:01] I can't even describe how bad it is.[3:12:03] It's a place where they're using like a personal cooler.[3:12:08] It's all dirty. Like a dirty personal cooler is involved.[3:12:12] That's how bad their job is.[3:12:14] They're walking around in clothes like this starter coats,[3:12:19] all their coats. Oh, and they love football. Oh, that'll save them.[3:12:24] The game as they smile with that crooked smile.[3:12:28] The game will save them.[3:12:31] Everything with them is the game. Everything with them is, Oh God,[3:12:36] the worst food, the food to the snacks.[3:12:40] They love snacks, the shittiest snacks. That's what I mean.[3:12:44] These people are so valueless to me.[3:12:47] They had on my life and it always felt like I was there to receive[3:12:51] something. I feel like that's why we're here.[3:13:00] That's our Lotto tune by the way. He's great though.[3:13:05] I actually,[3:13:11] okay. So there was another one.[3:13:13] Jelly roll said something else about us too this week, right?[3:13:16] You pull that up to the top. Let's see. There was another one here.[3:13:20] It's the second in that red bar in the wild jelly roll submits[3:13:26] second. Obeyment. Look at this one.[3:13:27] You posted it on Facebook and Instagram. Oh my God.[3:13:30] Jelly roll is actually a big fan. Wow. And then this pulls up.[3:13:35] That's amazing. Stop, stop, stop. Okay.[3:13:38] So let's see what happens here. Oh, wait, he's going off.[3:13:46] One thing first. Can we light this motherfucker up?[3:13:49] If music has ever changed your life tonight,[3:13:51] he's telling them to put their cell phone.[3:13:53] Not everybody has a cell phone that they could use.[3:13:55] Y'all keep them motherfuckers. It's a lot of battery. They're using[3:14:06] using the sun. They're paying here. You got out of that one.[3:14:14] This is your main hit. I got to say you to sing it, bro. Here's,[3:14:17] I'm saying all this horrible stuff about jelly roll.[3:14:20] Guess what's happening though. I'm starting to like him.[3:14:25] Come here. Jelly roll, honk, honk.[3:14:29] I do want to hang now. Actually,[3:14:32] you got to see what else he said about me here.[3:14:34] And I can't believe this is happening.[3:14:35] Like I can't believe that I'm almost in his crew.[3:14:40] Jelly roll is a big fan. Let's see. So here's a little video.[3:14:44] So somebody comments on jelly rolls album release here. Here.[3:14:49] My debut country album,[3:14:51] which it chapel is out now two days ago on Twitter and he's a[3:14:56] big star. You saw the arena.[3:15:00] Somebody comments, red bars watching. Okay.[3:15:04] That's it with the blue check embarrassing us a little, but that's fine. Yeah.[3:15:09] You should not be paying for the Twitter. We know that. Okay. So I'll wait.[3:15:13] It's a video. It's a video screen shot, a video screenshot. Okay. Let's go.[3:15:17] Red bars watching and then jelly roll.[3:15:21] Right. Actually a big fan.[3:15:26] He took time out of his record release and don't[3:15:31] show him this clip of all this. This is,[3:15:36] I don't want him to see this, you know,[3:15:39] I want him to think I'm with it and cool, you know, edit this up.[3:15:44] If you want to make this look really slick, then you could do it,[3:15:48] but I don't want to lose his, uh, interest here. We,[3:15:51] I feel like we got this guy on the line actually a big fan and this wasn't it.[3:15:55] I mean, he interacted with a few other people.[3:15:57] I don't know if we have proof of that, but I've seen it posted.[3:16:01] I've seen messages pour in jelly roll. I told him you're watching.[3:16:04] He said he knows he likes you.[3:16:08] He could have been a huge fan ever since the Joey Diaz incident.[3:16:11] No, he's a huge friend of Joey Diaz. He's one of Joe ideas.[3:16:15] So he started watching it to be like, what's the deal?[3:16:18] And then he tuned in, he loved it. Was there more to this video?[3:16:22] The video ends there. Yeah, actually a fan. Okay. So yeah,[3:16:26] jelly roll knows us, uh, which is,[3:16:31] that's exactly what, how I want the show to, you should go to, uh,[3:16:35] one Oh six 20 of the doc to see him reacting to our bed. Okay.[3:16:40] Let me get that back up. I might've closed it. Yes, we do have,[3:16:44] and we're going to need your help with this one. Uh, wait till you see this,[3:16:48] this is worth or the weight. Let me just find that. What? That was on Hulu,[3:16:53] Hulu, watch Hulu, watch.[3:17:00] What time are we going to one Oh six 20 one Oh six 20. Okay.[3:17:04] So we all got the gist, right?[3:17:05] Jelly roll saw red bars video and you could find that on YouTube.[3:17:09] What's the video called again?[3:17:11] Jelly roll submits to Joe Rogan. Something like that. Yeah.[3:17:16] What's the time code here? One Oh six 20. Okay. Watch this.[3:17:20] And we're going to need your help with this one Oh six 20 wait till you see[3:17:23] this. So there's a scene in this documentary,[3:17:27] starting at around one Oh, uh, say it again. Jules.[3:17:32] One Oh six 20 one Oh six 20. Write that down guys who could help.[3:17:36] I'm sweating up a storm here.[3:17:38] We got to take a break after this because people said they didn't like watching[3:17:41] me. Swear to look like I'm lying the whole time. I agree.[3:17:46] When I start getting warm, it's not cause it's warm in here.[3:17:48] We got the AC fixes cause he's cooking it, cooking it up inside,[3:17:53] getting hot. So, um,[3:17:57] here's a scene of jelly roll checking his comments and stuff. Okay.[3:18:01] One Oh six 20. Um, Hulu, uh, documentary.[3:18:05] So somebody clip this and then make it here.[3:18:09] I'll show you and you could probably get the idea from here.[3:18:12] So imagine he opens his phone and he's reading something like[3:18:17] this and he's looking really, he's wiping tears from his eyes.[3:18:21] Then you cry to him holding the phone,[3:18:24] but you put the video of eyes,[3:18:28] the video that he watched the jelly roll submits to Rogan.[3:18:32] And you do some fun with editing pink trip style stuff.[3:18:36] Basically this is, can you guys make an edit of him?[3:18:39] He's on his phone right now, but he's watching the red bar clip of him. Okay.[3:18:43] Watch. This is great footage for you guys to edit with,[3:18:47] but use the real footage. Make it nice. Make it look real here.[3:18:54] We caught this. We thought it would be perfect.[3:18:56] And then you hear our video playing that he's watching, right? He's crying.[3:19:00] He's even going to say some stuff that could be good for the edit.[3:19:03] He's holding his eyes.[3:19:08] So this is going to be like a meme at it. That's a great reaction video.[3:19:12] Reaction video to him watching.[3:19:16] And then you could leave in some of it, be creative, make it good and make it real.[3:19:29] This old scene where you take the mic off and the camera goes down.[3:19:33] That's it for the day. So, so emotionally as to get up.[3:19:38] And you could even leave this in here and all this of him being unattached his[3:19:42] mic and everything that you've seen that in every doc.[3:19:47] And of course, how do you, you just became a star.[3:19:50] You've already got this beautifully decorated mansion. Where do they get?[3:19:54] I don't understand how people get the decorating done.[3:19:57] Like who does jelly roll call?[3:19:59] We've been trying to decorate our home for three years.[3:20:02] It's not together. These guys, they get rich the next day,[3:20:06] fully decorated pad everything bought it fully furnished,[3:20:09] but still, I don't know how they're finding that type of house.[3:20:14] It's probably not that nice. Everything is outdated. You know,[3:20:16] these real estate agents,[3:20:19] it's so amazing how the real estate agents push all the outdated houses to the[3:20:23] suckers. Like it's so great.[3:20:26] Well, you could just tell that this is what's happening.[3:20:29] So when you go to buy a house from a real estate agent,[3:20:33] they know like what kind of person you are.[3:20:36] So they save all the good new houses,[3:20:39] all the cool houses for like the good rich people.[3:20:43] And when they see a sucker like jelly roll come in, they're like,[3:20:45] let's show you like a house that is like 10 to 20 years[3:20:50] outdated that a black person would buy if he just got rid.[3:20:55] And you can tell they do this to black people all the time.[3:20:58] Cause especially in LA,[3:21:00] like imagine like 2008 decor,[3:21:04] like, but in a $16 million mansion,[3:21:08] kind of like Ethan Klein's house. So imagine in 2008,[3:21:11] in 2008, somebody builds a beautiful mansion,[3:21:16] but with 2008 trends,[3:21:20] 2008 cabinetry, 2008 tile,[3:21:23] a real rich person is going to be sick of that by 2016.[3:21:29] They got to get out. They need the newest stuff as we all do.[3:21:33] So they sell their house,[3:21:35] a house that should be worth more than 16 million technically,[3:21:39] but only to a loser you see. So the real estate agent,[3:21:43] what makes them good is they, they can go, Oh, okay.[3:21:46] See this outdated house that no actual good person would buy.[3:21:51] Like we're never going to sell this to somebody with any style.[3:21:54] So are there any black people we can show this house to?[3:21:58] And they sell black people. If you notice all rich black people,[3:22:02] every rich black person has a out dated[3:22:07] decor in their brand new house.[3:22:10] You think that's just an accident and they're like, wow, this place is a mess.[3:22:15] And it's like,[3:22:16] Oh, the cabinetry is all like just dark wood.[3:22:22] Like the pool even isn't cool anymore. Like nothing's cool.[3:22:25] It's all like 2008. They're like, Tim, this is marvelous.[3:22:30] Oh, wow. The black person liked it. Huh?[3:22:34] I hope you know what I mean.[3:22:37] Faze rugs house. Like, yeah. When you go, and it's so funny how black people,[3:22:41] in the black people, these poor black people are so new to being rich.[3:22:44] They don't know that that's like all outdated, rich stuff.[3:22:49] Like it's so outdated that nobody who's really rich now would ever want it.[3:22:54] So they give it to the black people and they give it to people like jelly roll[3:22:58] where it's like, look at this cabinetry, like this cabinetry,[3:23:03] nobody who's rich now wants this. This is UGG,[3:23:09] like these candles, like in there,[3:23:11] the real estate agents and all these like how stage or people are like,[3:23:14] we could sell all this outdated house,[3:23:16] staging furniture that we bought from 20 years ago to these idiots who think[3:23:20] it's nice. I guess they got to sell it. It's perfect. It's so good.[3:23:23] And if I was a real,[3:23:24] I think that's the secret to being a real good real estate agent asked Tim[3:23:29] Dylan in LA,[3:23:30] you probably make a killing selling these outdated houses.[3:23:35] Cause if there weren't any black, new black, rich people,[3:23:40] you couldn't sell these outdated houses for $60 million.[3:23:43] You'd have to like lower the price to like $8 million,[3:23:47] but they could sell it to the black people.[3:23:49] The black people think all this stuff is new. Okay.[3:23:51] Did everybody get that in there? Fully understand the concept, huh?[3:23:54] Tell everyone, tell everyone that concept.[3:23:58] That's what real estate agents are doing.[3:24:00] That's why they changed it to the primary and not the master because there's so[3:24:05] many black people in the market now to buy a house and they need to get them in[3:24:09] quick. Look at his house.[3:24:16] White trash. People think this is like the nicest luxury mansion there is.[3:24:22] They have no, you know what I mean?[3:24:23] They have no concept of what else is available.[3:24:27] That's what's so great about the white trash.[3:24:32] Listen to this lyric. The cold November rain.[3:24:35] They got him in the car. He's ballooning all over Detroit. So there it is.[3:24:40] Jelly roll, huh? Was there anything else with him? Oh, wait,[3:24:44] didn't we pull up the dock to watch something? Yeah, that was it. Oh,[3:24:47] that was it. Okay. Jelly roll everybody.[3:24:51] I hope you enjoyed that segment. Jelly roll. You said you were a fan.[3:24:54] I hope you enjoyed that two hours of your time.[3:24:59] I bet you got a lot of things. A lot of people to feed.[3:25:01] Why don't you go use that time you spent and donate it to a charity of your[3:25:05] culture. I know you love helping people get some, so much food on Christmas.[3:25:10] I like, you know, I want to give back to the community that I,[3:25:12] and what did you do by the way that you're so guilty for?[3:25:16] You must've done some kind of rape or something because all these[3:25:20] criminals who are like so guilty and they want to like give back and they're[3:25:24] just so thankful. It's like, what did you do when you were a criminal?[3:25:28] Did you do something like really bad that we could never forgive?[3:25:31] Like Joey Diaz has that vibe. Where Joey Diaz,[3:25:35] it's almost like, did you rape someone?[3:25:39] We're going to tell you what happened with Joey Diaz. He's quit his podcast.[3:25:43] Our thoughts after this, we'll be right back. Don't go anywhere.[3:25:47] Don't touch that dial. Shirley. She's got the music on time this time.[3:25:52] Shirley, it's ready to go. I mean,[3:25:54] I gave her so much lead up that we were going to break.[3:25:56] Well, see you soon. That sounded good.[3:26:26] Talk crazy to me, but Kendrick know I like a regular girls.[3:26:29] I'm not good with the regular girls. Damn near want a veteran girl.[3:26:32] I just might change your life. We ain't wearing no Giuseppe jeans.[3:26:35] We ain't doing none of normal things. Do you know what formal means?[3:26:38] Critics saying that I lost the plot. Principals, yeah, I'd rather not.[3:26:41] Messy bout to come in hot.[3:26:46] We gon fuck up the world. Excuse me, but it's that your girl.[3:26:49] Didn't mean to possess your girl. Maybe I'm high profile.[3:26:52] Don't ever tell them you met me girl. They gon think that you repped me girl.[3:26:56] Five seven. I'm messy girl. I'ma pass you to Neymar.[3:26:59] He got time for your Bessie girl. Niggas know that I'm best dressed.[3:27:02] Too high profile to access. I ain't even got a fact check.[3:27:05] All I'm wearing is Wells bond. I'm feeling good. I might wear no.[3:27:09] Matter of fact, let's stay platonic. I just fucked.[3:27:11] Ain't that ironic? You can pick the bunker bed.[3:27:13] Either way, I'm a want some head. Messy live through me instead.[3:27:16] We grew up around trifling hoes. You ain't did nothing.[3:27:19] I don't know. It's cool, baby. I'm too high pro.[3:27:21] I'm baby keem. I won't call it close.[3:27:24] Messy. Get them girls off the stage.[3:27:26] Cause somebody's gonna get taken. Somebody's gonna invade.[3:27:29] On a one on one conversation. I'm ducked off from the world.[3:27:32] I'm immersed in the PlayStation. And I ain't worried about her.[3:27:35] It's a thousand hers out waiting.[3:27:37] We gon fuck up the world. Excuse me. But it's that your girl.[3:27:40] Didn't mean to possess your girl. Maybe I'm high profile.[3:27:44] Don't ever tell them you met me girl. They gon think that you repped me girl.[3:27:47] Five seven. I'm messy girl. Famous but I'm not for sale.[3:27:50] Why you trying to possess me girl? I mean you know what upset me girl.[3:27:53] It was like that when you met me girl. Cause he'll put you in princess shoes.[3:27:57] Elevate you. Respect you too. Here's 10k. I'm in a sexy mood.[3:27:59] Don't let the homies touch you. Move. Yeah niggas know that I'm best.[3:28:02] Dressed with martini when I bought jets. They sardines and I'm big fishy.[3:28:06] Caviar when I'm deep. Pressed take selfies. I'm in Czech Republic.[3:28:09] Cornell. He go check the budget. Parked too many from my cousin.[3:28:12] Never gave it back cause it's nothing. Fuck it.[3:28:15] Yeah. New devotions. Keep it focused.[3:28:18] Starship. Is that a foreign? A foreign?[3:28:20] She's organic. Skin is glowing. My heart is glowing.[3:28:23] Split personality. Two phones. Two emotions.[3:28:26] Girl you get the notion. It's not hard to notice.[3:28:30] That's a deep deep deep deep deep ocean.[3:28:33] Charli say she sell a bit. I'ma keep hoping.[3:28:36] Charli say she love with me. I'ma be open.[3:28:47] Nasty. Get them girls off the stage. Cause somebody's gonna get taken.[3:28:51] Somebody's gonna invade. On a one on one conversation.[3:28:54] I'm ducked off from the world. I'm immersed in the playstation.[3:28:57] And I ain't worried about her. It's a thousand hers out waiting.[3:29:21] I'm a busser. I cross the street.[3:29:45] I lie and wait until sundown. I saw it happen.[3:29:51] I saw your murder. I watched that knife as it went down.[3:29:55] Into your breast. And now you're running around and around.[3:30:00] Running for cover. Oh oh oh.[3:30:03] Now soon discover. Dead in the street. Oh oh oh.[3:30:08] I'd say that's right.[3:30:39] I'm a hunter. I've lashed my teeth.[3:30:42] I snuck you into my darkness. Tail is frozen.[3:30:47] Dead nights in Garova. Oh oh oh.[3:30:51] Nightstand is right.[3:31:08] In and out of lipstick. In and out of lipstick.[3:31:14] Red murder.[3:31:15] In and out of love.[3:31:22] Showing me a good child. Showing me a good stick.[3:31:29] Showing me a good child. Showing me a good stick.[3:31:35] Where are the girls? Where are the girls now?[3:31:46] Where are the girls? Where are the girls now?[3:32:00] Who is this? Who am I? What is this?[3:32:07] Truth is this. That it lies. Truth exists.[3:32:15] Who is this? Who am I? What is this?[3:32:21] Truth is this Truth is this[3:32:26] That it lies Truth exists[3:32:30] America America has a problem[3:32:51] Truthfully, I be lyin' in my rap song[3:33:17] Cause I always felt a mission, I slap homie[3:33:19] This career didn't come with no life insurance[3:33:21] Hope is day one, fans got some facts on her[3:33:23] I'm honorary beehive, let's see why them diamonds don't mean fly[3:33:25] They are CGI, you better get it off your chest like breath reduction[3:33:28] If she stress over you, she stress for nothin'[3:33:30] Hold up, wait a minute[3:33:32] Even AI gotta practice, clone a kinship[3:33:34] The double entendre, the encore remnants[3:33:36] I pop like tin men, the ops need tin men[3:33:38] Real boys, they know[3:33:40] At the hoe, rightfully so[3:33:42] Simmer down, I go, I go[3:33:44] Cause you got that deep for me[3:33:46] Pray love is deep for me[3:33:48] I'ma make you go weak for me[3:33:50] Make you wait the whole week for me[3:33:52] I see you watchin', feelin'[3:33:54] I know you want it, seemin'[3:33:56] I know you need it, drug lord[3:33:58] You want it all, you don't[3:34:00] I know you need love[3:34:02] I need some too[3:34:04] Do you want this?[3:34:06] Like it wants you[3:34:08] Know that booty gon' do what it want to[3:34:10] Can't hit it one time, want to move[3:34:12] I know you see these red, red racks on me[3:34:14] Now come and get high, high, high, high, high[3:34:16] 20, 40, 80 out the trap[3:34:18] Hit it with the rap, put it on the map[3:34:19] We'll be right back[3:34:21] Call me when you wanna get high, high, high, high[3:34:23] 20, man, turn up with the racks[3:34:25] I'll be D on my bag, double G's on my dash[3:34:27] You be, I'm bad[3:34:29] I'm bad[3:34:30] Boy, you can't get no higher[3:34:34] Than this[3:34:36] No, no[3:34:38] Cause love don't get no higher[3:34:42] Than this[3:34:43] No, no, no[3:34:46] Grind[3:34:47] Boy, you know I grind[3:34:49] When I pull up, this change of mind[3:34:51] Your mind[3:34:53] When I step on the scene, they[3:34:54] Can't wait to back it up[3:34:56] You're still a dope, but it ain't crack enough[3:34:58] I'm supplying my man[3:35:00] I'm in demand, some as I live[3:35:02] Just know I roll with them goons[3:35:03] In case you start, I can't fulfill ya[3:35:05] This kind of love, this business[3:35:07] Oh, slap, I feel for[3:35:09] Boy, you can't get no higher[3:35:12] Than this[3:35:14] No[3:35:15] Cause love don't get no higher[3:35:20] Than this[3:35:21] No, no[3:35:24] Grind[3:35:25] Boy, you know I grind[3:35:27] When I pull up, this change of mind[3:35:29] Your mind[3:35:30] When I step on the scene, they[3:35:32] Can't wait to back it up[3:35:33] You're still a dope, but it ain't crack enough[3:35:36] I'm supplying my man[3:35:37] I'm in demand, some as I live[3:35:39] Just know I roll with them goons[3:35:41] In case you start, I can't fulfill ya[3:35:43] This kind of love, this business[3:35:45] Oh, slap, I feel for[3:35:47] Know that booty gon' do what it want to[3:35:49] They hit it one time, potable[3:35:51] Know you see these red, red, reds on me[3:35:53] Now come and get hot, hot, hot, hot, hot[3:35:55] 20, 40, 80 out the trap[3:35:56] Get it with the rap, put it on the map[3:35:58] Get it right back, right back[3:36:00] Call me when you wanna get hot, hot, hot[3:36:02] Tony Montana with the raps[3:36:04] I'll be D on my bag, double G's on my grass[3:36:06] Drew B, I'm bad[3:36:08] I'm bad[3:36:13] I'm bad[3:36:43] Diddy cares to hold me[3:37:07] But I found the ground[3:37:09] And hit it upside down[3:37:16] Diddy dressing easy[3:37:18] And not to enjoy[3:37:20] The way he talks me now[3:37:24] So pull it B, try and beat me up[3:37:33] Diddy cares to wake me[3:37:35] And I bend my knees[3:37:37] And lead me to his knees[3:37:44] I will be Diddy[3:37:46] Of the truck he streams[3:37:48] Steady as a stream[3:37:52] Pull it B, howling is your dream[3:37:56] Is your dream[3:38:03] It's twisting and bailing[3:38:08] Whenever you're in pain[3:38:10] Don't turn to me[3:38:14] You see your lungs fast asleep[3:38:17] Please don't go out of shape[3:38:21] Diddy by my lips tear[3:38:23] I can almost taste a smokey drill of work[3:38:32] Whispers in my left ear[3:38:34] And I swear in the earth[3:38:36] The very warm I hear[3:38:40] Will it be, I don't think I care[3:38:44] Pull it B, I don't think I care[3:39:00] What's happened, you bad motherfuckers[3:39:08] We're gonna be coming back here[3:39:11] One, two, three, four[3:39:17] Welcome back everybody, thank you[3:39:19] We need a little cool down in here, okay?[3:39:22] It's getting a little hot, a little psycho in here[3:39:26] Welcome back to Red Bar[3:39:28] We hope you're having a joyous time[3:39:30] Please consider joining our Scars Club[3:39:33] To make sure you're listening to all the episodes[3:39:36] Remember, one episode is free[3:39:39] One episode is Scars Club[3:39:41] So if you're not Scars Club, you're missing half the experience here[3:39:45] redbarradio.net slash Scars Club to join[3:39:49] Thank you[3:39:52] We got something exciting coming up in just a moment[3:39:55] But before we do that, should we talk about Joey Diaz?[3:40:00] Should we talk about what's been going on with him?[3:40:03] Because I can't believe the gift we received[3:40:08] From Joey Diaz, it sounded too good to be true[3:40:11] I heard Steel Toe[3:40:13] The show that I listened to, Steel Toe[3:40:16] I heard them covering this[3:40:18] That's where I got the idea to also cover this[3:40:24] And it's episode 244[3:40:28] 244 of Uncle Joey's Joint[3:40:32] This is Joey Diaz[3:40:34] When we last heard from Joey Diaz on the show[3:40:36] I can't believe he was threatening to kill us with his car[3:40:40] Remember that?[3:40:42] She's guilty of laughter[3:40:44] You're guilty of laughter[3:40:48] And of course we like that, you know, this is[3:40:52] Again, a gift to us when somebody like Joey Diaz[3:40:56] Does something like that[3:40:58] We're hoping that this Jelly Roll gets into a similar situation[3:41:01] I want it to be with Jelly Roll[3:41:03] He's been working so hard to get out of crime, right?[3:41:06] He's been working so hard to turn his life around[3:41:09] And clean everything up[3:41:11] And stay out of trouble and help other people[3:41:13] I want this to be the one thing that makes him revert[3:41:17] To his old ways[3:41:19] And we get him back behind bars[3:41:22] You know, the place that he thought he was done with[3:41:25] I believe we could get Jelly Roll back in prison[3:41:28] That's the kind of energy I like to give Joey Diaz too[3:41:31] That fear that, oh, all those[3:41:33] Remember those times?[3:41:35] Those are around the corner again[3:41:39] And that's kind of what Joey Diaz, I think, thinks[3:41:43] You know, Joey Diaz seems to have been running away[3:41:47] From some boogeyman in LA[3:41:50] You know, he talks about his story like[3:41:52] I had to get the fuck out of there dog[3:41:55] But wait, why?[3:41:57] Just because of the homeless people[3:42:00] The tent city was getting bigger[3:42:03] COVID restrictions[3:42:05] Joey seems to have fled LA[3:42:07] For a little bit more than the homelessness in COVID[3:42:10] Like he's fled on[3:42:12] He was talking about how he had to buy a gun[3:42:15] And all of this stuff[3:42:17] If you've been following any Joey Diaz stuff[3:42:19] Or heard him on Rogan[3:42:21] You'd think some incident happened in LA[3:42:24] You'd think his daughter got kidnapped at the park[3:42:27] So they had to get the fuck out of there[3:42:30] But what did actually happen[3:42:33] To make Joey Diaz flee from LA[3:42:38] Why did Joey get so anxious during the Me Too movement[3:42:45] And why does Joey act as if[3:42:49] If he didn't get the fuck out of LA[3:42:51] He might find himself back behind both[3:42:56] This is what I think[3:42:58] I think Joey did some sort of heinous Me Too[3:43:03] Hainess enough[3:43:05] That he thinks if it came out[3:43:08] They're gonna take away everything that he's worked for[3:43:11] Or he got a scare over that giving blowjobs at the comedy store thing[3:43:16] That kind of was in the news with Joe Rogan[3:43:19] Even though it was more focused on Joe[3:43:20] They tried to cancel me? I'm out of here[3:43:22] Good luck canceling me in Jersey[3:43:25] I'm out[3:43:26] And it's almost like he thinks fleeing LA[3:43:30] Will protect him from the woke mob[3:43:33] That's eventually gonna like uncover some dirty dirty secret of his[3:43:40] But it's so childish[3:43:41] It's like you're actually fleeing out[3:43:43] Like you think the problem is just cause you're in LA[3:43:45] I don't know if it's like he saw Chris D'Elia, Brian Callan[3:43:51] And he really let his paranoia do the work[3:43:54] With those milligrams[3:43:57] And he's letting his paranoia put him in a place where he thinks[3:44:01] That something's[3:44:03] I don't want to be in LA when they find out what I did[3:44:06] I don't want to[3:44:07] And it's almost as if[3:44:09] You heard the news[3:44:10] He's canceling his podcast[3:44:11] I mean he's quitting[3:44:13] He's quitting his podcast and it's almost like[3:44:17] He thinks if he's not doing a podcast[3:44:19] Or not doing anything[3:44:20] Then they have nothing to cancel him from[3:44:22] And that he could hide out kinda[3:44:24] It's almost as if he's[3:44:26] Really scared of something[3:44:28] Now Joey I'll be perfectly honest with you[3:44:31] I only have[3:44:32] Four[3:44:35] Stories about you that could end you[3:44:37] Land you in jail[3:44:38] That's it[3:44:39] It's not that many[3:44:41] So Joey I want you to know that I do have four stories[3:44:44] That if the media heard[3:44:46] You might be sentenced to jail[3:44:49] To jail[3:44:51] I don't want to scare him of course[3:44:53] He doesn't seem like the type who likes that kind of news[3:44:57] But let's take a listen to his final episode here[3:45:01] Very interesting too because he's got the Patreon[3:45:04] Can we get that? Send that over his Patreon[3:45:07] Let's see how many people[3:45:08] Did it show the number before?[3:45:11] Did we write down the number?[3:45:13] And let's see what it's in now that he's quit his podcast[3:45:17] I think he thinks the Patreon is just free money[3:45:19] That people have signed up just because they love him[3:45:21] And they're just supporting him[3:45:23] But it seems like the Patreon is where he's making[3:45:26] His living now[3:45:28] Remember he's not doing stand-up comedy anymore Jules[3:45:30] He's quit[3:45:32] He's not doing[3:45:33] I mean this is pretty unbelievable for one of Joe Rogan's[3:45:35] Top guys that you can't hear enough of[3:45:40] He's quit comedy[3:45:42] He's quitting his podcast[3:45:45] I don't know how he plans to make a living[3:45:47] Let's see[3:45:48] Sorry I've got to go to it on a different browser[3:45:50] Because if you're a member of the Patreon they don't show you the number[3:45:53] Oh yes, you've got to go to a private[3:45:55] But let's take a listen to his[3:45:57] Looks like he's still the same[3:45:58] Still the same? Isn't that amazing?[3:46:00] What's the number there?[3:46:01] 4625[3:46:02] I think that's[3:46:03] 4625 patrons?[3:46:05] Mm-hmm[3:46:06] Patreons?[3:46:07] Patrons[3:46:08] And how much money is that? Does that say?[3:46:11] Is he doing the money thing?[3:46:13] Is it five bucks?[3:46:14] $5.10 or $15[3:46:16] Wow $5.10 or $15 depending on how cool you think he is[3:46:21] At least $23,000 a month[3:46:24] At least $23,000 a month[3:46:26] So that's a scary thing for a guy like this to do[3:46:29] He's in New Jersey, he doesn't have much money[3:46:31] He never made a lot of money[3:46:34] You know[3:46:35] It's just Joey Diaz[3:46:37] You know everybody thinks if you're friends with Rogan[3:46:39] Now they all think that because Rogan has $200 million[3:46:42] That all of them have like $100 million[3:46:44] No really only Tom Segura and those types[3:46:48] And Burt[3:46:50] But Joey probably didn't figure it out[3:46:52] He didn't really optimize[3:46:55] You know a strategy to make a ton of money off of this[3:46:58] And if he did he probably blew it[3:47:00] Or he owed a lot of duds[3:47:02] This is a guy who had like bad credit[3:47:04] Probably still can't really do much with credit[3:47:07] I mean this is a real like immature adolescent guy[3:47:10] When you hear some of these stories of his[3:47:13] Not tough guy gangster stories[3:47:16] They're almost like immature like[3:47:18] Stuff like a kid would do[3:47:20] Not like an old mafia man would do[3:47:24] Let's get into this podcast episode 244[3:47:27] You're gonna hear some insane things[3:47:29] And let's get the rumors flowing[3:47:31] What did Joey do?[3:47:33] That he's gotta quit everything that he's doing[3:47:35] And now you know my video[3:47:37] His response to my videos make perfect sense[3:47:39] We came along at a time where his anxiety was at its highest[3:47:43] He was in the middle of fleeing LA based on his anxieties and fears[3:47:48] Donkey lips[3:47:50] Anytime you hear me say anxieties, fears[3:47:52] That's this guy donkey lips Michael Ray Bauer[3:47:54] That's how he talks and it's[3:47:57] You just gotta say fears, anxieties like that if you've seen him[3:48:02] But it's a man running away from a city[3:48:06] It's a man running away from his career that[3:48:08] Is doing really well, I mean he's just on a book tour[3:48:11] Everybody's celebrating his book[3:48:13] There's not a comic alive that doesn't tell you that Joey Diaz is the best[3:48:17] Big fan base[3:48:18] Opportunity to make a ton of money[3:48:20] Why is he giving up?[3:48:22] What is he running from?[3:48:24] And can I use it against him to make this worse for him?[3:48:27] Let's take a listen[3:48:29] Go to 224[3:48:31] 220 is the end of the ad[3:48:35] And let's see what he's saying here today[3:48:38] You're gonna like this[3:48:40] Uncle Joey Shaw, I love that[3:48:42] Is that him palm muting back then?[3:48:44] What's happening you bad motherfuckers it's Thursday[3:48:46] Remember here was the first thing[3:48:48] You're going Mike what is this?[3:48:49] Some AI[3:48:53] And it's so funny his fans make these AI picks[3:48:56] Like this is what the fans want him to be[3:49:00] Like you want him to have like a cool neon room[3:49:04] And you want him to be like younger and kind of tougher[3:49:08] Not as slob like[3:49:11] This is your ideal version of your Uncle Joey[3:49:15] That is very gay[3:49:16] That you're sitting around going[3:49:18] This is my ideal Joey[3:49:22] So they've made him these photos to put on his podcast on YouTube[3:49:27] So that there's a little visual element[3:49:29] But Joey has switched to audio only[3:49:32] This is another thing you gotta go[3:49:34] Why did he do that?[3:49:35] I mean he was doing videos[3:49:36] We've watched his video podcast many times[3:49:39] It was just a webcam in front of him[3:49:41] Two or three webcams[3:49:43] His first move a couple weeks ago[3:49:45] Was he's doing audio only now[3:49:48] The future is audio[3:49:49] That's what he said[3:49:51] Didn't give us an explanation[3:49:52] He goes guys you know I've been doing this camera shit for years now[3:49:55] It's time to move on[3:49:58] It's time to move on[3:49:59] And it's like what?[3:50:01] He's talking about like we all know what he's talking about[3:50:03] But we don't[3:50:04] He's like[3:50:05] Guys I gotta be honest[3:50:06] I've been doing this camera shit with the video version for six years now[3:50:10] You all know that[3:50:11] It's time to move on[3:50:13] I gotta do it audio only now[3:50:15] And you're going what?[3:50:16] Why can't you be on camera?[3:50:19] So he switched to audio only and listen to this[3:50:22] Hey June the first[3:50:24] I'm very sorry we haven't been on here for a few weeks[3:50:27] We had a couple holidays[3:50:28] A couple fucking disasters here in our personal lives[3:50:32] Mike was in the hospital[3:50:34] Is somebody saying his producers quit I think[3:50:38] Is that what happened?[3:50:39] Now why did his producers quit?[3:50:41] What's going on?[3:50:42] Because why can't he just say that?[3:50:44] These guys quit[3:50:45] I gotta wait till I find a new guy[3:50:47] But all of a sudden he's shutting everything down[3:50:49] Let's hear him out[3:50:52] For a weekend and then[3:50:53] It was Memorial Day weekend[3:50:55] And then you know[3:50:56] Things just kept getting deeper and deeper[3:50:58] But we're all[3:50:59] 100 motherfucking percent[3:51:01] On a Thursday morning[3:51:04] Everything's been great lately[3:51:06] I've been having a great time[3:51:07] I have not seen[3:51:08] The Burt movie or the Sebastian movie yet[3:51:12] I see people already torturing them[3:51:14] For no fucking reason[3:51:15] They should be very proud[3:51:17] About their accomplishment[3:51:18] That's a perfect lead up to our next segment coming up[3:51:23] I like how he says[3:51:24] Burt's movie came out[3:51:25] Sebastian's movie came out about my father[3:51:30] And the first thing he says is[3:51:31] People are torturing him[3:51:33] I guess Burt's box office numbers weren't[3:51:36] People will tell you all about the movie[3:51:39] But I love that that's part of this[3:51:42] I feel bad[3:51:43] But hey[3:51:44] Welcome to the motherfucking movie business[3:51:46] The situation at hand today is[3:51:48] Us talking about what's going on[3:51:50] What the future is[3:51:51] Basically a couple weeks ago[3:51:53] It had nothing to do with anybody[3:51:55] It was just[3:51:56] It's getting rougher to do this[3:51:58] Listen[3:51:59] It's getting rougher to do this[3:52:00] I'm just working on something else[3:52:01] We tried it in the house for a while[3:52:03] And now[3:52:04] You know[3:52:05] I don't know what happened[3:52:06] Over the pandemic[3:52:07] But I knew after the pandemic[3:52:09] Listen to this stuff[3:52:10] Don't mind me[3:52:11] Listen some people could tell you[3:52:12] Whatever the fuck they want[3:52:13] I'll tell you how it is[3:52:14] I just wasn't the same[3:52:16] I could just feel myself pulling away[3:52:18] From stand up[3:52:20] And[3:52:21] Stand up and[3:52:22] Why?[3:52:23] Everything else[3:52:24] You know when I moved here[3:52:25] I wanted to take some time to myself[3:52:27] Those sounds[3:52:28] Mike kept calling me[3:52:29] And torturing me[3:52:30] That I'm a loser[3:52:31] That I should do something with my time[3:52:32] I never called him[3:52:33] So I listened to him[3:52:35] I took his lead[3:52:36] And I could feel[3:52:37] From the first three podcasts[3:52:39] That I had lost something[3:52:40] That it was completely different[3:52:41] What?[3:52:42] Yeah I know we're here a lot[3:52:46] That's Joey not me[3:52:47] It's almost like when there's video[3:52:49] Your brain kind of[3:52:50] Cuts that out automatically[3:52:52] But when it's audio[3:52:53] It's like[3:52:54] Yeah that's all you're really hearing[3:52:56] I listen to this in headphones[3:52:58] It's like[3:52:59] Yeah don't listen to this part in headphones[3:53:01] Speakers![3:53:04] Yeah that's pretty bad[3:53:05] And my headphones are very clear[3:53:08] Yeah I'm hearing every lick[3:53:10] He's like a little dinosaur[3:53:16] You know they wish he fucking looked like this[3:53:20] You wish you looked like that[3:53:23] Alright let's try to ignore that though[3:53:25] Cause you gotta hear what he's saying[3:53:26] I wanted to do something completely different[3:53:28] I just wanted to be like Paul Harvey[3:53:30] For you guys who don't know who Paul Harvey is[3:53:33] He's a fucking old guy that I grew up on[3:53:35] That would have a radio show every day at noon time[3:53:38] That spoke about nothing[3:53:39] But it was the most interesting fucking show[3:53:42] I ever listened to in my life you know[3:53:46] And I loved what Bill Burr did[3:53:48] I loved what Theo does by himself[3:53:50] You know I wanted to give it a try[3:53:52] I thought it would be great[3:53:54] Just to come up here and free ball[3:53:56] And fucking whatever but[3:53:58] It didn't pan out for me guys[3:54:00] It didn't pan out for me guys[3:54:03] Now what's so interesting[3:54:04] He says that[3:54:05] I thought I was gonna come up here[3:54:06] Just do my podcast[3:54:07] Free ball[3:54:09] You know just riff[3:54:11] Tell his stories[3:54:13] But it didn't pan out[3:54:16] Alright keep pinning that[3:54:18] What's that 436?[3:54:19] Listen to this ad here[3:54:22] This is so interesting[3:54:23] It reminds me of one of these ads[3:54:25] That he did here[3:54:26] Let's see if we can catch it[3:54:28] The first gide game was this heavy fucking thing[3:54:31] Forget it[3:54:32] Fuji gi[3:54:33] They got great company there[3:54:35] From the supplement[3:54:36] So okay[3:54:37] We just heard him say[3:54:39] It didn't pan out for me[3:54:42] And we're wondering what that's about[3:54:43] First of all[3:54:44] Hell yeah[3:54:45] Does that mean I was right?[3:54:47] Thank you[3:54:48] It didn't pan out for you[3:54:49] Oh how interesting[3:54:51] Wonder where you got that idea from[3:54:55] But listen to what he says[3:54:56] In this alpha brain ad[3:54:59] The joint is also brought to you[3:55:01] By my favorite honor[3:55:02] They were there when we started[3:55:04] And they're still there today[3:55:05] That tells you the type of company they are[3:55:07] From the supplements[3:55:08] To the kettle bells[3:55:09] To the club bells[3:55:10] Anything they have to offer[3:55:12] They're worth it[3:55:13] Anything they have to offer[3:55:14] They're workouts[3:55:15] Go to honor.com right now[3:55:17] Check out the website[3:55:18] Check out what they have to offer you[3:55:20] If you see something you like[3:55:21] Press in fucking church[3:55:23] Joey joint[3:55:24] And get 10% off your order[3:55:26] And start your relationship[3:55:28] With honor to make your life stronger[3:55:30] I have[3:55:31] And it's panned out for me[3:55:32] Little by little[3:55:36] I have make your life a little bit stronger[3:55:38] I have[3:55:39] And it's panned[3:55:40] So when it's an ad[3:55:41] For alpha brain[3:55:42] His life did pan out[3:55:45] When it's the reality[3:55:47] Two minutes later[3:55:48] It didn't pan out[3:55:52] So what was that 436?[3:55:53] 436[3:55:54] But go back a little before[3:55:55] Yeah[3:55:56] That's incredible[3:55:58] You just said it panned out for you[3:56:00] When you wanted me to buy[3:56:01] $60 black label alpha brain[3:56:04] From on it[3:56:05] So you could get your hands on[3:56:06] A little bit of that[3:56:07] Affiliate cash[3:56:10] But now you're telling me[3:56:11] It didn't pan out for you[3:56:12] So should I return the on it[3:56:14] That I bought with[3:56:15] Joey joint[3:56:16] Church code[3:56:19] Beautifully said[3:56:20] Give it a try[3:56:21] I thought it would be great[3:56:23] Just to come up here[3:56:24] And free ball[3:56:25] And fucking whatever[3:56:26] But[3:56:27] It didn't pan out for me guys[3:56:29] You know[3:56:30] And then uh[3:56:31] Guest[3:56:32] And[3:56:33] Yes it did pan out for you[3:56:35] Here's the surprise[3:56:36] Part of the segment[3:56:37] I[3:56:40] Am here to whip you back[3:56:41] Into shape[3:56:42] And get you off your ass[3:56:43] You ain't quitting[3:56:45] You ain't going[3:56:46] Nowhere[3:56:48] You get back up[3:56:49] And you start working[3:56:51] Your book just came out[3:56:52] Everybody loves you[3:56:54] Get back to work pussy[3:56:58] You're not quitting[3:56:59] We're not letting you quit[3:57:02] Spoiler alert[3:57:03] For the rest of this segment[3:57:04] Alright[3:57:05] Let's hear the rest of this segment[3:57:06] Alright[3:57:07] Let's hear this guy complain[3:57:08] And whine like a girl[3:57:10] I can have Jesus on here[3:57:11] You guys don't want him[3:57:12] You know what I'm saying[3:57:13] Like it[3:57:14] It's like you know[3:57:15] And I understand[3:57:16] And I understand[3:57:18] And then everything changed[3:57:19] Listen man[3:57:20] I've been doing this podcast shit now[3:57:21] Since 2011[3:57:24] It's not that long[3:57:26] When nobody even knew[3:57:28] What a fucking podcast was[3:57:31] Like if you get into do a podcast today[3:57:33] I love how you have the dream job[3:57:36] The dream life[3:57:37] I mean Joe Rogan literally hands you the keys[3:57:40] To whatever kind of career you want[3:57:43] And that's too much[3:57:44] Too much for you to just sit at your desk[3:57:45] And do an audio podcast for one hour[3:57:48] You got to give up on that[3:57:51] What could be so bad[3:57:54] That this dream job is[3:57:56] What else are you going to do[3:57:59] Are you borrowing money from Rogan[3:58:01] Like everybody else[3:58:02] Because that really is happening[3:58:03] Ari Shaffirs[3:58:05] I've got a clip about that[3:58:06] Yeah we've got a clip about that coming up[3:58:10] I just don't understand[3:58:11] To quit a podcast like this[3:58:13] Is like the most selfish[3:58:15] Little whiny[3:58:17] Spoiled bitch[3:58:18] Attitude thing[3:58:19] I mean didn't you see the Jelly Rolls[3:58:21] Fan base people[3:58:22] What they have to do[3:58:26] Could you imagine if they just had to do[3:58:27] A one hour[3:58:29] Once a week[3:58:30] Audio podcast[3:58:32] For $23,000 minimum a month[3:58:35] I mean that's what your patrons are paying you[3:58:37] And you can't get off your ass[3:58:39] And just do some bullshit[3:58:40] That's what you've been doing[3:58:42] It's got to be woe is me[3:58:44] Sorry guys[3:58:45] What could have possibly happened[3:58:48] Where for $23,000 a month minimum[3:58:51] You can't get off your ass and record[3:58:53] For one hour a week[3:58:54] Telling your bullshit stories[3:58:57] I mean that's[3:58:58] That's your literal job[3:59:01] You're quitting your job[3:59:03] I mean what kind of person[3:59:05] In their 50s[3:59:06] Just quits their job[3:59:07] For what[3:59:09] You can't just quit your job[3:59:11] I mean[3:59:12] You're a father[3:59:13] This is a father[3:59:14] Imagine your dad just goes[3:59:15] I'm quitting my job[3:59:16] But yeah[3:59:17] It's a dream job[3:59:18] It's so easy[3:59:19] I just can't do it[3:59:20] It's too much[3:59:21] Why[3:59:22] I don't know[3:59:23] It seems like he is[3:59:25] Still uploading about 17 minute long[3:59:30] Audio notes[3:59:31] To the patron[3:59:32] So he knows he's got to[3:59:33] Appease that patron[3:59:34] He can't lose those[3:59:35] So he didn't even really[3:59:36] Think that through[3:59:37] He's like[3:59:38] I want to quit[3:59:39] Oh yeah that patron[3:59:40] Some of them are only[3:59:41] 48 seconds long[3:59:42] Yeah[3:59:43] His updates[3:59:44] Daily motivation[3:59:45] But people aren't going to stick around[3:59:46] If he doesn't have the podcast[3:59:48] They're not going to stick around[3:59:49] For 17 minute updates[3:59:52] Every two weeks[3:59:54] And 48 second clips[3:59:55] They're not going to keep paying[3:59:58] $23,000 a month minimum[4:00:00] That's if everybody's on the 5 level[4:00:02] Which they're not[4:00:03] They're on that 15[4:00:08] Could you imagine[4:00:09] These other guys[4:00:10] Brian Callan[4:00:11] He's got a $22 level[4:00:13] For what?[4:00:15] You have people that you look up to[4:00:16] Well you know[4:00:17] Rogan's doing this[4:00:18] You know[4:00:19] Fucking Shale Sonners doing this[4:00:22] The Bodega Boys are doing this[4:00:24] When we got into it[4:00:25] It wasn't like[4:00:26] I didn't know nothing[4:00:27] I didn't know if I had to interview people[4:00:29] What do you think[4:00:30] I fucking came up interviewing people[4:00:32] I'm a criminal[4:00:33] People interviewed me[4:00:34] You know what I'm saying[4:00:35] I never interviewed fucking nobody[4:00:38] So[4:00:39] You know[4:00:40] This is all new to us[4:00:41] When we started this in 2011[4:00:43] And again[4:00:44] I like how these guys are such idiots[4:00:45] That they're like[4:00:46] Well Joe Rogan's podcast[4:00:47] Is an interview podcast[4:00:48] So I guess we do interviews[4:00:51] You didn't know[4:00:52] That there were other options[4:00:53] I can't even tell[4:00:54] I don't even want to tell these comedians[4:00:55] The secret[4:00:56] How much bigger they could be[4:00:58] If they went beyond interviewing people[4:01:04] The secret[4:01:06] To podcast success[4:01:07] Is not in the interview[4:01:10] I'm very grateful for the podcast movement[4:01:12] Because without the podcast[4:01:14] I would not be here[4:01:16] My career would have been something[4:01:17] Completely fucking different[4:01:20] Because I always[4:01:21] Wanted to have a podcast[4:01:22] I didn't even know what a podcast was[4:01:24] I just wanted the opportunity[4:01:25] To tell my story[4:01:27] And[4:01:28] That was the great thing about it[4:01:30] And it was so new[4:01:32] And interesting[4:01:33] And everybody jumped on it[4:01:34] And we were having a great fucking time[4:01:37] But[4:01:38] I had to pull the church[4:01:39] Why?[4:01:40] When we were doing fucking tremendous[4:01:41] I mean[4:01:42] Why?[4:01:43] Pulling the church[4:01:44] Just lets you know[4:01:45] Where you're at[4:01:46] That was his old podcast[4:01:47] In LA[4:01:48] The church was great[4:01:49] And I was having a great time[4:01:50] Even during the pandemic[4:01:51] We were getting great numbers[4:01:52] Everything was working out[4:01:53] And once[4:01:54] You know[4:01:55] We were going to change it around[4:01:56] But[4:01:57] Boom[4:01:58] The pandemic happened[4:01:59] And I didn't shut it down[4:02:00] Because I was brain dead then[4:02:03] I shut it down[4:02:04] Because it was time to fucking[4:02:05] Get the fuck out of there[4:02:06] Why?[4:02:07] And I had to get Lee out of there[4:02:08] And I had to get my friends out of there[4:02:09] And look up[4:02:10] Why?[4:02:11] All the people that left[4:02:12] How many people[4:02:13] We're all listening to this[4:02:14] As if we totally understand[4:02:15] What he means[4:02:17] Just because[4:02:18] Rogan[4:02:19] And Hinchcliffe[4:02:20] And Red Band[4:02:21] Left and moved to LA[4:02:22] Did you think there was like[4:02:23] A robot war[4:02:24] In LA[4:02:25] That was coming?[4:02:28] I mean every other celebrity[4:02:29] In the world[4:02:30] Still lives there[4:02:31] And[4:02:32] Their Architectural Digest[4:02:33] Videos[4:02:34] Seem fine[4:02:37] I don't know[4:02:38] What you thought was happening[4:02:39] Like he took it[4:02:40] Really literal[4:02:43] Like he took the[4:02:44] Homelessness problem[4:02:45] And he said[4:02:46] Like they're really[4:02:47] All invading[4:02:48] Like he really thinks[4:02:49] It's like an outbreak[4:02:50] Like a zombie thing[4:02:51] Like a zombie thing[4:02:52] Happened[4:02:54] You know[4:02:55] And I don't think it was really[4:02:56] As intense as he's making it out to[4:02:58] We had to get the fuck out of there[4:02:59] I had to get everybody out of there[4:03:00] Did we ever play that clip[4:03:01] I think it was on the same episode[4:03:03] That he was talking about us[4:03:04] The gun?[4:03:05] Yes the one where he said[4:03:06] That he bought a gun[4:03:07] Which is illegal by the way[4:03:08] Because you're a felon[4:03:09] And he also did this whole thing[4:03:11] Where he was like[4:03:12] I would be walking down my street[4:03:14] And I would see these two kids[4:03:16] And what were they up to[4:03:17] You don't see kids like that[4:03:18] Like he was going paranoid[4:03:19] He goes[4:03:20] I knew L.A. changed[4:03:21] I knew L.A. changed[4:03:23] When I looked outside[4:03:24] There were two black kids on my street[4:03:26] I go[4:03:27] These kids ain't from this neighborhood[4:03:29] So what are they doing up there[4:03:31] The neighborhood's changing[4:03:32] I had to get out of there[4:03:34] He literally saw two black kids[4:03:36] In his neighborhood after COVID[4:03:37] And thought the whole neighborhood[4:03:38] Was going to be a gang[4:03:40] Something like that[4:03:41] Like he's living in the movie land[4:03:44] He's like really living in the past[4:03:47] Nothing bad happened[4:03:48] I mean Joe is a horrible best friend for him[4:03:50] Because Joe's probably scaring him[4:03:52] Yeah see he's taking Joe like really literally[4:03:55] About all this stuff[4:03:57] When Joe was just taking it as like[4:03:59] I'm the richest podcaster in the world[4:04:01] I want like my life to be super free[4:04:04] So I want to make it better in Texas[4:04:06] Because I don't want to abide by these lockdowns[4:04:09] But Joey took that information as[4:04:11] We got to get the fuck out of L.A.[4:04:13] It's about to blow[4:04:16] Alright let's hear some more[4:04:17] Left and really left[4:04:18] Me, Lee and Steve Simone[4:04:20] Everybody else is treading back there[4:04:22] Well I wanted to go take a look[4:04:24] Now I'm doing sets[4:04:25] No man[4:04:26] You got to stick to your fucking words sometimes[4:04:29] And that's something that[4:04:30] That's a difference between being a player[4:04:34] And being a fucking king[4:04:35] You got to see certain things[4:04:37] And you got to attack them[4:04:39] Before somebody else lets you know[4:04:41] Like I've always said[4:04:42] I've taken great pride[4:04:43] And not have somebody telling me[4:04:45] When I've got to leave the room[4:04:47] I've always taken great pride in that[4:04:49] And that's why a couple weeks ago[4:04:51] I was like you know what man[4:04:52] This thing is not working[4:04:53] What?[4:04:54] We shut it down[4:04:55] Why isn't it working?[4:04:56] Just to see if it would make it a little easier[4:04:58] And it still felt like a struggle to me[4:05:00] You know at times[4:05:01] Struggle?[4:05:02] And I just want to be honest with everybody[4:05:05] That I think my podcast day is come and gone[4:05:09] Well what are you going to do?[4:05:10] I saw it[4:05:11] And at least I don't have to fucking[4:05:13] Have people tell you[4:05:14] You know this is over[4:05:15] I mean I feel it guys[4:05:17] What?[4:05:18] You know you have to live a little[4:05:19] To have a fucking podcast[4:05:21] I haven't lived the last three years[4:05:23] Oh really?[4:05:24] It's not like I've been on planes[4:05:25] Or gone to Houston[4:05:26] Okay by the way[4:05:27] Is it lived?[4:05:28] We make fun of Joey all the time on here[4:05:29] But people love him[4:05:31] Like when you[4:05:32] Yeah they love him[4:05:33] He's got a ton of fans[4:05:34] Nobody is saying he's falling off[4:05:36] They all in the comments[4:05:37] Needing him[4:05:38] The only issue he has on the whole internet[4:05:41] Is us[4:05:42] That's it[4:05:43] We're the only people in his way[4:05:45] Universal[4:05:46] Me and Danny Woodward[4:05:47] That's about it[4:05:48] Yes[4:05:49] Like he takes[4:05:50] I guess he thinks when Danny Woodward messages him[4:05:53] Once every two months[4:05:54] Saying we're coming[4:05:55] He takes that as like that's a big mob on the internet[4:05:58] Coming for him[4:06:00] Yeah I hope we're responsible for a lot of the spheres[4:06:04] You know the most interesting thing for me[4:06:07] About having a podcast[4:06:08] Is living your fucking life[4:06:09] And then reporting on it[4:06:11] In a certain way[4:06:12] In a certain way that you could do it[4:06:14] Whether it's a concert[4:06:15] Whether it's a movie[4:06:17] Whatever the fuck[4:06:18] You know a golf game[4:06:19] I don't give a fuck[4:06:20] But uh[4:06:23] You know it just wasn't working anymore[4:06:25] And for weeks[4:06:27] I just sat here and would say to myself[4:06:30] Why do I keep doing this?[4:06:31] Woo[4:06:32] Loser[4:06:33] Why do I keep doing it?[4:06:34] Is it the money?[4:06:35] Idiot nerd[4:06:36] What is it?[4:06:37] And then I realized man[4:06:38] I'm out of stories[4:06:39] You know what?[4:06:40] I'm out of stories[4:06:42] Thank you[4:06:44] Rewind the tapes[4:06:46] God I wish we had replays of all my best predictions[4:06:49] You know when all these people started their little podcast[4:06:52] I go wait till you see what happens when they[4:06:54] And I literally use these words[4:06:56] Run out of stories[4:06:59] And now[4:07:00] What is it?[4:07:01] And then I realized man[4:07:03] I'm out of stories[4:07:04] I'm out of stories[4:07:06] Who would have thought huh?[4:07:08] And don't think it's not happening to Tom Segura[4:07:10] To Bird[4:07:11] To Andrew Santino[4:07:12] To all these posers[4:07:14] Podcast posers[4:07:15] I ain't out of no stories[4:07:17] I'll tell you that right now[4:07:19] Because I've paced myself[4:07:21] Right?[4:07:22] You ask me why isn't he on every single day[4:07:24] Doing Twitter spaces[4:07:25] It's called pacing yourself[4:07:28] I got 20 more years I gotta fill with this crap[4:07:31] You gotta pace yourself here[4:07:33] You gotta be smart[4:07:34] Uh yeah you can't tell[4:07:35] You can't be on five podcasts a day[4:07:37] Running through all your stories laughing it up[4:07:40] Now look what you've got[4:07:42] You've got nothing left[4:07:43] And you were all story based[4:07:45] On these incredible stories right?[4:07:47] Your life stories were really all you had[4:07:50] And now that you've told those[4:07:52] What more do you have to say?[4:07:54] Pretty fucking pathetic[4:07:58] He's got no confidence[4:07:59] I thought you guys were genius comedians[4:08:01] You're supposed to be coming up with stuff[4:08:05] To quit like this[4:08:06] How pathetic Joey[4:08:08] Speaking of rewinding the tapes[4:08:10] To you saying that everyone's gonna run out of stories[4:08:13] I have such a good app idea[4:08:15] If anyone builds an app[4:08:17] Yeah what is it?[4:08:18] This is what you should do[4:08:19] An app that listens to you all day[4:08:21] And records everything you say in text form[4:08:24] Yeah[4:08:25] And then you can search the text[4:08:27] A transcript[4:08:28] To get your thoughts from like a month ago[4:08:29] Wouldn't that be great?[4:08:30] Yeah so it's an app that's constantly recording you[4:08:32] Which I know the guys love[4:08:34] I'm fine with that[4:08:35] And then you could search the transcript[4:08:37] For things that you were saying[4:08:39] So that you could prove that you predicted the downfall[4:08:44] Not a bad idea[4:08:45] I could use that yeah[4:08:46] Alright let's hear some more[4:08:47] You know what?[4:08:49] I just did something that[4:08:51] On paper looked so great[4:08:53] But in reality was so hard[4:08:55] I just emptied my heart of everything I had[4:08:58] Like whether it was good[4:09:00] Or bad[4:09:01] Or things that made me embarrassed[4:09:03] Into a fucking book[4:09:04] And then I sat across[4:09:06] The book's a mess[4:09:07] Lee and Felicia[4:09:08] And told stories on how[4:09:10] You know[4:09:11] These things affected my life and stuff[4:09:13] Well it was great for all it lasted[4:09:15] But now after the book is out[4:09:17] I'm all out of fucking ideas guys[4:09:19] Yes[4:09:20] I have nothing to compare it to[4:09:21] Out of ideas[4:09:22] If I don't ever have to tell a story[4:09:24] About my fucking past again[4:09:26] It would make me so fucking happy[4:09:28] Oh[4:09:29] Little sick[4:09:30] Of talking about your stupid self[4:09:32] Huh[4:09:33] Who would have guessed[4:09:34] Who would have known[4:09:36] That talking nonstop[4:09:38] Day in and day out[4:09:40] This is what I talk about the Taylor Swift concert[4:09:42] People can't endure[4:09:44] As much as they think they[4:09:46] I don't know[4:09:47] Why they're not thinking this through[4:09:49] Yeah that sounded like a bad idea[4:09:52] To burn through all of your stories[4:09:55] In two hot years[4:09:57] And talk nonstop[4:10:00] On podcasts[4:10:01] Day in and day out[4:10:03] Who would have thought[4:10:04] You'd get sick[4:10:06] Of hearing stories about yourself[4:10:08] It would make me so fucking happy guys[4:10:11] So in other words[4:10:12] Yeah I'm kind of over it a little bit[4:10:15] I feel bad[4:10:16] Because I know I got a[4:10:17] You guys are loyal soldiers[4:10:19] And your family at this point[4:10:21] Listen the people that were soldiers disappeared[4:10:23] The people that stuck around[4:10:25] The new people we got[4:10:26] The people that were soldiers disappeared[4:10:29] His biggest fans[4:10:30] His biggest soldiers[4:10:31] He says they disappeared[4:10:33] Listen the people that were soldiers disappeared[4:10:35] The people that stuck around[4:10:36] The new people we got[4:10:38] You guys are family[4:10:39] You know from the Lwinguses[4:10:41] To the fucking Quadrex[4:10:43] There's tons of names[4:10:45] Sergio Ortega's[4:10:46] Sergio Ortega we're coming for you[4:10:48] Since the fucking Beauty and the Beast[4:10:50] Sergio Ortega is his Todd Detter[4:10:55] The one that got away[4:10:57] I'm going to need that[4:10:58] I'm going to need that[4:10:59] Your business back Todd[4:11:01] I'm working for it[4:11:03] Yeah my biggest goal is to get this guy Todd Detter[4:11:05] Back to being a fan[4:11:06] If anyone could help[4:11:07] I wonder what he's doing[4:11:09] I'd like to buy Todd Detter a new[4:11:11] Townhouse[4:11:13] I know he likes a townhouse[4:11:15] Todd Detter and me should go to the Beyonce concert[4:11:18] Just the two of us[4:11:19] Would you like that Todd?[4:11:20] Would that bring you back here into the fold?[4:11:22] Would you like to go see Beyonce?[4:11:24] With me[4:11:26] Because I'm not going[4:11:27] Me and him[4:11:29] Alright let's hear a little bit more[4:11:31] I mean Sergio Ortega and me have been together[4:11:33] Since the fucking Beauty and the Beast[4:11:35] And we got relationship[4:11:37] You know[4:11:38] 12 minutes now[4:11:39] Go to 12?[4:11:40] Yeah he just blah blah blah[4:11:41] Sergio this[4:11:42] See he's got plenty of stories[4:11:44] Plenty of stories[4:11:45] Alright let's go to 12 minutes[4:11:46] Him and Sergio sitting in a tree[4:11:48] Alright let's hear[4:11:50] Oh and they've switched[4:11:51] I like this picture better[4:11:52] This is how I prefer to see him[4:11:54] So this was a good one[4:11:55] So it's another fan AI image of Joey[4:11:59] And it's like[4:12:00] Okay then put on the suit[4:12:02] Then do your hair[4:12:03] Then lose a few pounds[4:12:04] If you want to be this guy[4:12:06] You know this is what they prefer you to be[4:12:08] A man in charge[4:12:10] Not some whiny anxiety ridden bitch whining[4:12:14] That it's too hard to do a podcast[4:12:17] There was no way I was buying a house here[4:12:20] I didn't want to die out there[4:12:22] There was no fucking way[4:12:24] And I'm really proud of these things right now today[4:12:27] And I'm going to point my life guys[4:12:29] I got to be honest with you[4:12:31] I don't care[4:12:32] You don't care[4:12:33] You know like when somebody calls you[4:12:34] And they're like hey man[4:12:35] Did you listen to this thing?[4:12:36] Sounds depressing[4:12:37] I really don't care[4:12:38] It's so sad guys[4:12:40] You know it's like I stopped[4:12:43] Even listening to YouTube[4:12:45] You know my agent sent me some speech[4:12:47] You stopped even listening to YouTube[4:12:49] I can't imagine[4:12:51] That means no clients[4:12:53] What would I do without my clients?[4:12:56] My whole life is made up of those clients[4:12:58] That's YouTube[4:13:01] So I can't imagine how dark it must be[4:13:04] To not even watch YouTube anymore[4:13:07] That was Joey's favorite place[4:13:08] He would watch all the videos[4:13:09] But why isn't he watching YouTube anymore?[4:13:12] Let's take a listen[4:13:13] I really don't care[4:13:15] It's so sad guys[4:13:17] You know it's like I stopped[4:13:19] Even listening to YouTube[4:13:21] You know my agent sent me some speakers[4:13:23] And I started listening to my[4:13:25] My agent sent me some speakers[4:13:29] He's going to tell you[4:13:30] How he transitioned out of just watching YouTube[4:13:33] His agent sent him a pair of speakers[4:13:35] Changed his life[4:13:36] He started listening to old 72's[4:13:40] Now that's entertainment[4:13:42] So he basically turned into an old stupid man[4:13:44] An old stupid sausage eating[4:13:48] Sunbathing Italian[4:13:50] Sitting outside holding court[4:13:52] As Josh Jenney calls it[4:13:53] We'll show you that tweet coming up[4:13:56] But that's what you want to be[4:13:57] Just some stupid fucking papa[4:14:00] Sitting there with his mouth open[4:14:02] With that big...[4:14:05] That's what you want to be[4:14:06] Listening to your little records[4:14:08] You can listen to music[4:14:09] And do the best show in the world[4:14:12] I'm listening to music[4:14:14] Every day[4:14:15] Taylor Swift[4:14:16] Taylor Swift the tour[4:14:19] YouTube[4:14:20] You know my agent sent me some speakers[4:14:22] And I started listening to my fucking music again[4:14:25] And if not I'll come in here and put an album on or something[4:14:28] But I couldn't go on YouTube anymore[4:14:30] Listen[4:14:31] Just that[4:14:32] Just that opening page[4:14:34] Just that opening page[4:14:35] And I'm like where are these people coming from[4:14:37] With all these videos about Brendan and this guy[4:14:40] Everybody's[4:14:41] I hate videos[4:14:43] Joey[4:14:45] He opens up YouTube and his whole algorithm is me[4:14:47] Talking too funny[4:14:49] Saison Z[4:14:51] Right all the meanies[4:14:53] Too lazy to try[4:14:54] Too lazy to try[4:14:57] So he's opening up YouTube and all the videos are[4:15:00] Hatrous videos[4:15:03] So he says this[4:15:04] Just that[4:15:05] Too much crap[4:15:06] Just that opening page of[4:15:08] And I'm like where are these people coming from[4:15:10] With all these videos about Brendan and this guy[4:15:13] Everybody's a bad guy today[4:15:15] And listen[4:15:16] I don't care about that shit[4:15:17] But it's like[4:15:18] Well you stopped using YouTube and went to records[4:15:22] That's a big switch[4:15:26] You know there's no commentary on those records[4:15:28] You're gonna need your YouTube[4:15:30] So he's sitting at home[4:15:32] Okay[4:15:33] You know think about this[4:15:34] He's been sitting at home all pandemic[4:15:37] Watching YouTube[4:15:39] And watching these little hate videos[4:15:41] He doesn't understand[4:15:43] That it's not the end of the world[4:15:45] He watches these videos[4:15:47] And he thinks it's like the walls are closing in[4:15:50] And that these are like mains[4:15:52] He doesn't understand that[4:15:53] He thinks if it's on his feed[4:15:55] It's on everyone's feed[4:15:57] Like a lot of people are very confused about[4:16:00] The little algorithm they're stuck in[4:16:02] Isn't it funny that the algorithm that the comedians[4:16:06] Use to get so famous is also the algorithm[4:16:09] That brings them so much pain[4:16:11] Yes[4:16:12] It's so beautiful[4:16:13] Yes[4:16:14] Thank you clippers[4:16:15] You know those clippers were on to something[4:16:18] Because now every comics algorithm[4:16:20] Is also all these little nitpicky videos of them[4:16:23] That they really don't understand[4:16:25] That they're taken too seriously[4:16:27] I don't need to understand[4:16:28] This is for the boys[4:16:29] Okay[4:16:30] Let us have fun[4:16:31] Really[4:16:32] You know these guys of this age group[4:16:34] The guys who came up with no internet[4:16:36] You know the Joe Rogan age group[4:16:38] These hate videos like you know Kumiya[4:16:42] All these people[4:16:43] They can't take these hate videos[4:16:46] It's like destroying them[4:16:48] And you're hearing one by one[4:16:50] We just saw Jim Brewer do it with me[4:16:52] Jelly roll[4:16:54] He can't stand it[4:16:56] He wants to hang soon[4:16:58] Hang me[4:16:59] He would hang me like this[4:17:01] Imagine this[4:17:02] And he easily could[4:17:03] I mean you could not fight that[4:17:04] Well[4:17:06] I'm taking an actual[4:17:08] I've hired a guy[4:17:09] Of jelly roll size[4:17:10] Where I'm working on this move[4:17:12] Where I run and climb him over[4:17:16] To get away from him[4:17:17] All I got to do is learn how to[4:17:19] Wall climb[4:17:20] It's like a wall climbing thing[4:17:22] That I clip on his shirt[4:17:23] And I go up up up up[4:17:25] Everybody cheers[4:17:26] And then I jump down the back[4:17:28] Hopefully I don't break my legs[4:17:29] It's story stories high[4:17:32] So let's see the hate videos are getting to Joey[4:17:35] Like where are these people coming from[4:17:37] With all these videos about Brendan and this guy[4:17:39] And everybody's a bad guy today[4:17:41] And listen[4:17:42] I don't care about that shit[4:17:44] But it's like[4:17:45] It just got old[4:17:46] It just got old man[4:17:48] You know I have friends now that call me[4:17:50] And talk to me about stand up[4:17:51] And[4:17:52] I got to be honest here[4:17:54] I don't know what the fuck they're talking about[4:17:56] Listen[4:17:57] You know the only person I talk to[4:17:59] About stand up and enjoy anymore is Lee[4:18:01] Joey[4:18:02] I have a great time talking to Lee[4:18:04] Lee Steihat[4:18:05] You ever seen this big goofy retard[4:18:07] About several hundred[4:18:09] Several thousand pounds[4:18:11] He's the gross[4:18:12] It's like Joey[4:18:13] You shouldn't even be hanging around[4:18:14] Lee Steihat[4:18:17] Why is he so confused[4:18:19] Joe Rogan is literally like willing[4:18:21] To buy you a mansion[4:18:23] In Austin[4:18:24] Buy you a car[4:18:25] Pay for your every move[4:18:27] And you're gonna sit here and blow it all[4:18:29] So you could sit in Papa's farting room[4:18:31] In Jersey[4:18:32] In that crappy little[4:18:34] Jerzistic house[4:18:35] Cause you think that you're safe there[4:18:37] From cancel culture[4:18:38] You're afraid of the videos[4:18:40] You're afraid that you're gonna get exposed[4:18:43] What is the thing that he said[4:18:44] It's like Joey[4:18:45] Even if you raped somebody[4:18:46] And it got in the news[4:18:47] You're fine[4:18:48] Your fans don't care[4:18:49] You went into hiding for what[4:18:51] For a podcast[4:18:52] Remember that[4:18:53] You went into hiding for what[4:18:55] For a podcast[4:18:56] For a podcast[4:18:57] Yeah for a podcast[4:18:58] That's how I reacted to that[4:18:59] I remember[4:19:00] I went yeah for a podcast[4:19:01] That's it[4:19:04] I mean you were a guy yelling at me for hiding[4:19:09] You're hiding[4:19:11] In Jersey[4:19:12] We're hiding[4:19:13] You're hiding[4:19:14] Okay[4:19:15] And I'm coming for you with the cops[4:19:17] We've got a search warrant[4:19:18] That I just obtained[4:19:19] Tell them that[4:19:20] Mike from Red Bar[4:19:21] Attained a search warrant[4:19:22] They said that he's allowed to come in[4:19:24] With a camera crew[4:19:25] Ask him if he's seen the movie Reality[4:19:28] On HBO Max[4:19:29] Tell him dude it happened in reality[4:19:31] That's what's happening to you[4:19:33] Cause he'll believe anything[4:19:35] You could really trick him in anything[4:19:37] Tell him this[4:19:38] Mike from Red Bar[4:19:40] Got a search warrant[4:19:41] Cause his dad[4:19:42] Is like big money with the police[4:19:45] They donate to the police[4:19:46] His family is like really rich[4:19:48] They got a search warrant[4:19:49] They said that they're allowing him to do a whole video tour of your house[4:19:52] Next Tuesday[4:19:53] You gotta get your shit out of there[4:19:55] You gotta add one element of absurdity[4:19:57] Yeah[4:19:58] So the video tour is enough[4:20:01] Yeah be like[4:20:02] They're gonna be live streaming[4:20:04] Yeah live streaming a video tour of your house[4:20:07] Doing the FBI search[4:20:08] Yes and it's like a full search[4:20:10] They're gonna need your phone[4:20:11] And they have access to your computers[4:20:13] Tell them that[4:20:14] He will believe[4:20:16] That's how stupid he's been[4:20:19] I really relate to what he's doing[4:20:21] I like what he's doing[4:20:22] I like the beginnings of comedy[4:20:24] This shit that happens at the end[4:20:26] I didn't like it at all guys[4:20:27] The end[4:20:28] He thinks this is the end[4:20:29] What do you mean?[4:20:32] This is how I feel everyday too[4:20:34] Like I'm in my[4:20:36] The end of my career here[4:20:38] Like I'm 89[4:20:40] Who are you Seth Rogen and Jay Barrow show?[4:20:44] Wait what's that?[4:20:45] This is the end[4:20:46] Oh god[4:20:47] Seth Rogen's got a new show[4:20:49] What is that called?[4:20:50] It's on Apple TV[4:20:51] Apple TV[4:20:52] Have you seen the show Platonic?[4:20:54] Oh my god[4:20:56] Oh my favorite actress is in it[4:20:58] Wait wait wait[4:20:59] No my favorite actress is in it[4:21:01] Rose Byrne[4:21:03] Oh Rose Byrne[4:21:05] Hell yeah[4:21:06] Who decided[4:21:08] Who thinks[4:21:09] Do people think we're hot for Rose Byrne?[4:21:11] They've been on screen partners since[4:21:13] No[4:21:14] And she wasn't good in any of those movies[4:21:17] So Seth Rogen is doing a new show[4:21:19] Where he's in charge[4:21:21] He's dressed like Ethan Klein in the show[4:21:23] You gotta see the show[4:21:24] If you thought[4:21:26] Shrinking[4:21:28] Was a good show[4:21:29] Wait till you see[4:21:30] Platonic[4:21:31] Platonic[4:21:32] Oh and you know it's good because it's on[4:21:34] Apple TV's show site[4:21:39] If you're in the Apple TV[4:21:42] TV series universe[4:21:44] You are fucked[4:21:46] Like if you're one of those people who thinks[4:21:48] The morning show[4:21:50] Is like something you should be watching[4:21:52] You're crazy[4:21:54] You've really lost the idea[4:21:56] Of what it is to be human[4:21:58] So please check out Platonic[4:22:00] On Apple TV Plus[4:22:02] Which looks like a settings page[4:22:04] Not a show[4:22:06] I usually skip it I think it's the settings[4:22:08] That's my stance[4:22:10] Apple TV go[4:22:11] Why are our numbers low?[4:22:12] Well a lot of people think we're a settings pain[4:22:14] On Apple TV[4:22:16] You know because it's just the Apple[4:22:18] With a plus logo it looks like[4:22:20] It's like the Apple Care[4:22:22] Section of the site[4:22:24] I really can't stand[4:22:26] This Apple TV Plus please and it doesn't[4:22:28] Look good like you ever watched a movie[4:22:30] And it's like Amazon[4:22:32] That's not a movie[4:22:34] Okay it can't[4:22:36] Just be brought to you by a store[4:22:38] Okay let's[4:22:40] Hear some more of this[4:22:41] Well maybe Hassan is so against[4:22:43] The Apple goggles because he's[4:22:45] An Amazon[4:22:47] PayPig[4:22:49] Or the opposite of a PayPig[4:22:51] Maybe he's into what? I'm sorry I didn't hear the beginning of that[4:22:53] He said maybe Hassan is hating[4:22:55] On the Google Goggles because he's an Amazon[4:22:57] Amazon wow yeah[4:22:59] Him and MrBeast are owned[4:23:01] By Amazon[4:23:03] The same agent[4:23:05] They work for big Disney big tech[4:23:07] Big Amazon[4:23:09] Meanwhile they're sitting there talking about socialism[4:23:11] Can you believe that?[4:23:13] We're all down at the Amazon factory to some of those Latinas[4:23:15] That pack up all your[4:23:17] High protein[4:23:19] Donuts[4:23:21] That you can't stop eating on stream[4:23:23] Or all those rings that you buy on Amazon[4:23:25] Why don't you go socialize them?[4:23:27] You know how many rings[4:23:29] Should I be wearing? Should I start wearing a bunch of rings?[4:23:31] Maybe I will get a class ring[4:23:33] You know[4:23:35] A cool cool[4:23:37] Football ring that says something of my liking[4:23:39] On it[4:23:41] Who's trying to figure out what it might say?[4:23:43] Okay let's hear some more[4:23:45] Joey Diaz[4:23:47] I didn't like it at all[4:23:49] It was a little overwhelming[4:23:51] You know guys it's nice to give videos a break[4:23:53] It gets old[4:23:55] No it doesn't[4:23:57] We don't know we start believing[4:23:59] What you guys say to us[4:24:01] We start believing[4:24:03] We start believing that you guys need more videos[4:24:05] And you guys need more of this[4:24:07] And after a while we don't see what we're doing[4:24:09] We're becoming Vince Vaughn[4:24:11] Becoming Vince Vaughn?[4:24:13] A lot of you don't know who Vince Vaughn is[4:24:15] I like Vince Vaughn he was a good actor[4:24:17] A lot of you don't know who Vince Vaughn was[4:24:23] Could be true[4:24:25] So his viewers are so[4:24:27] Jelly roll[4:24:29] Poor[4:24:31] That they might not know who Vince Vaughn is[4:24:33] I think that he's off on this one[4:24:35] You guys might not know who Vince Vaughn is[4:24:37] Listen to what he says about Vince Vaughn[4:24:39] But 20 years ago[4:24:41] If you had a movie about black people you put Vince Vaughn in[4:24:43] If you had a movie about Chinese people[4:24:45] He was in six films[4:24:47] They did come out[4:24:49] One after the other[4:24:51] But that's about it[4:24:53] It wasn't that wild[4:24:55] You put Vince Vaughn in[4:24:57] And he just over saturated himself[4:24:59] It was just a little too much[4:25:01] And now where do you see Vince Vaughn?[4:25:03] Just saw him at a hockey game[4:25:05] Oh yeah[4:25:07] He was looking great[4:25:09] Where were we? Phoenix[4:25:11] I was at a low rent hockey game in Phoenix[4:25:13] Shot at a children's school[4:25:15] An auditorium[4:25:17] And yeah Vince Vaughn was there and he was trying to catch my eye[4:25:19] Go Yotes[4:25:21] He was wearing an outdated leather coat[4:25:25] And he was sitting in the third row[4:25:27] And standing up and he kept going like this[4:25:29] As if the audience was going to cheer[4:25:31] He looked rough[4:25:33] So maybe he's right[4:25:35] And not everybody looked[4:25:37] At the hockey games by the way[4:25:39] Lower the freaking lights[4:25:41] Jesus Christ everybody looks like we're[4:25:43] It's like[4:25:45] It's so bright[4:25:47] You can film in there perfectly[4:25:49] No noise[4:25:51] But hey he's taking your advice[4:25:53] Once again[4:25:55] About being on[4:25:57] Stories and podcasts[4:25:59] Well there's a middle ground to this[4:26:01] I'm doing the right way[4:26:03] And I've got to stop giving away all my[4:26:05] Secrets on here[4:26:07] You should see for every secret I give away[4:26:09] Accidentally there's a thousand secrets[4:26:11] I keep because you can't tell them all the tricks[4:26:13] It's amazing how many of these[4:26:15] Tricks and secrets[4:26:17] That I've got[4:26:19] This is so easy[4:26:21] For me[4:26:23] To navigate[4:26:25] So it blows my mind when these guys[4:26:27] They have it all, they're making such good money[4:26:29] They've got the best[4:26:31] Fans in the world[4:26:33] And they're going to sit and find something to complain[4:26:35] About and whine about[4:26:37] Talking about how you don't want to become[4:26:39] Vince Vaughn[4:26:41] You know[4:26:43] You're already worse than Vince Vaughn[4:26:45] I mean[4:26:47] You're worse[4:26:49] You don't want to become Vince Vaughn if you've seen what you[4:26:51] Became instead[4:26:53] And it's not this picture, get this picture out of your mind[4:26:55] Think about the[4:26:57] Actual high res version of Joey Diaz[4:26:59] With all the dots and the[4:27:01] The lines and the[4:27:03] Sweat and the see through hair[4:27:05] By the way a lot of my[4:27:07] Hair have been falling out in the shower[4:27:09] A lot of hair[4:27:11] I'm thinking about buying a subscription[4:27:13] Hymns[4:27:15] A lot of my hair[4:27:17] Every week my drain[4:27:19] Every week my drain's got a ton of hair[4:27:21] I don't know if this is just a normal shedding[4:27:23] You know how like a man in his 40's goes through a[4:27:25] Widening and a shedding[4:27:27] Is this going to be[4:27:29] Cause I could use a shedding, that's the thing[4:27:31] My hair has always been so thick[4:27:33] This is like a winter hat[4:27:35] I've always complained[4:27:37] I'm so hot, my hair is so thick[4:27:39] It's like wearing a winter hat[4:27:41] A shedding would be nice, you know when I go to the barbers[4:27:43] I'm like get those thinning shears out[4:27:45] Put them to the scalp[4:27:47] And start going like this[4:27:49] All over and pulling the[4:27:51] I want two hairs gone for every[4:27:53] Three hairs[4:27:55] It's that thick[4:27:57] So maybe I'm going through a normal shedding but I am[4:27:59] Very scared of course[4:28:01] Because it's ramping up to a lot of[4:28:03] Hair in the shower[4:28:05] People are saying it's normal if you have thick hair Mike[4:28:07] Well it's never been normal before[4:28:09] And here's what I can't do[4:28:11] Do you know[4:28:13] You know how all these guys are using hair growth[4:28:15] Three formulas and all this stuff[4:28:17] And you're hearing like every guy[4:28:19] Every guy who starts losing his hair[4:28:21] On hair pills right[4:28:23] Fisterine and minoxidil[4:28:25] Did you guys know how[4:28:27] Nasty those drugs are[4:28:29] It's amazing[4:28:31] How many people what they'll do to their body[4:28:33] To keep[4:28:35] Their hairline[4:28:37] It's crazy actually like[4:28:39] Those drugs are so nasty[4:28:41] The side effects of those drugs are so bad[4:28:43] And the stuff that it could do to you[4:28:45] It's so crazy that it[4:28:47] It like blows my mind that some[4:28:49] Guy just because his hair is a little bit[4:28:51] Thinning would do that to himself[4:28:53] Thinking there's just no risk at all because it's[4:28:55] Hymns.com[4:28:57] It's on a podcast[4:28:59] What's the name of the drug you know[4:29:01] You could try even the Rogaine[4:29:03] Stuff the Rogaine[4:29:05] Has got a lot of nasty side effects[4:29:07] But they're all taking this pill[4:29:09] They're all going to hair doctors and what happens if you go to[4:29:11] A hair doctor this is what they're going to say to you[4:29:13] Oh yes you're going to lose all your[4:29:15] Hair get on every pill we have[4:29:17] You're never going to go to a hair doctor who's going to flip through and go[4:29:19] You got a great head of hair I don't think you got anything to worry about[4:29:21] Yes it causes like heart problems[4:29:23] Yeah listen to all this stuff[4:29:25] You guys hate heart problems remember the vaccine[4:29:27] Should all these vaccine[4:29:29] Guys which I'm one of[4:29:31] I still have no vaccine[4:29:33] In me by the way[4:29:35] So pretty cool it didn't cause a big[4:29:37] Scene just didn't get it[4:29:39] Girl power[4:29:41] Will power so there's no vaccine[4:29:43] In me[4:29:45] I didn't need to go around screaming and hollering[4:29:47] But at the same time I'm also not[4:29:49] Doing Rogaine and I'm not doing[4:29:51] Fistine and taking all these[4:29:53] Hair pills willy nilly[4:29:55] Without even thinking about it when they've got worse[4:29:57] Side effects than any vaccine could ever have[4:29:59] Way worse[4:30:01] And they're actually very common[4:30:03] These bad side effects[4:30:05] It's not like one out of a million guys[4:30:07] Gets a heart problem it's like you fix your hair[4:30:09] You're going to have a bad heart that's why all those guys[4:30:11] Kind of have a bad heart[4:30:13] Okay so that amazes me[4:30:15] That people are just willing to[4:30:17] I think I learned this through going through[4:30:19] My condition[4:30:21] That there is not one pill that they[4:30:23] Can give you that doesn't cause[4:30:25] Something else to go bad[4:30:27] I mean case in point I[4:30:29] Have never brought my dog to[4:30:31] The vet except when he got his ear bit[4:30:33] By the other dog[4:30:35] And my dog[4:30:37] Is nearly 19[4:30:39] With no issues[4:30:41] Not for a personality disorder[4:30:43] But it's fine[4:30:45] 19 no issues[4:30:47] These people who start bringing their dogs[4:30:49] You know like Ethan Klein[4:30:51] Every time their dog throws up[4:30:53] They bring it to the vet[4:30:55] They stop everything[4:30:57] Their dog threw up on the show the other day and they like[4:30:59] All panicked[4:31:01] What is he throwing up smell it smell it what's in it[4:31:03] Oh no[4:31:05] They don't know dogs throw up all the time[4:31:07] They're licking their fur[4:31:09] All day they're gonna gag they're gonna throw up[4:31:11] They're eating shit off the ground they're gonna throw[4:31:13] They've got iron stomachs[4:31:15] But most of the world[4:31:17] I think is taking their dog to the vet[4:31:19] Every time their dog pukes[4:31:21] Which is like a normal[4:31:23] I mean that would be like you know what I mean[4:31:25] It's crazy[4:31:27] And then they go okay well we gotta[4:31:29] Appease these people we gotta sell something[4:31:31] So here's a pill for the dog and then all of a sudden[4:31:33] Oh your dog's got liver problems[4:31:35] He's in surgery[4:31:37] He's having heartburn[4:31:39] Leave your dog alone[4:31:41] And leave your body alone[4:31:43] You really don't take a pill[4:31:45] For something or a medication or a surgery[4:31:47] Unless it's[4:31:49] Your only option[4:31:51] Like only take a medication[4:31:53] If your life is gonna be[4:31:55] Significantly worse[4:31:57] Without it[4:31:59] I mean that's really the only way but I think people take[4:32:01] These medications if you just take them[4:32:03] It's gonna lead to[4:32:05] I mean it's just like a[4:32:07] Domino effect of how bad[4:32:09] You're gonna feel I can't tell you how bad[4:32:11] I felt on all those medications and all the[4:32:13] Screwy Louie stuff it did me[4:32:15] Well let's see how you feel once you start[4:32:17] Getting that kestansum[4:32:19] Exactly so[4:32:21] You know what I don't think I could do the hair[4:32:23] Pills if that does[4:32:25] Start happening so you're gonna see me wearing a nice[4:32:27] Hat[4:32:29] Every show[4:32:31] It'll be such a sad thing I was really thinking[4:32:33] I never thought that I would lose any hair[4:32:35] You know I always thought[4:32:37] I was solid gold[4:32:39] In this area[4:32:41] So it really when that happens it's[4:32:43] But I searched his entire[4:32:45] Scalp the other day and it was all fine[4:32:47] And there was no thinning areas[4:32:49] Just gonna search every week there's no thinning[4:32:51] There's no visible thinning[4:32:53] But we are seeing a lot of hair in the shower which one guy[4:32:55] Said is normal if your hair is thick[4:32:57] So I don't know how[4:32:59] Normal that is it's a lot of hair guys[4:33:01] Sometimes I like to[4:33:03] Click a random clip and then read[4:33:05] The comments just to see what group[4:33:07] Because sometimes it reaches a crazy[4:33:09] Group that has never heard of you before[4:33:11] Like a red bar clip?[4:33:13] I like reading people's first impressions[4:33:15] First impressions of me what do people think[4:33:17] Once in the comments some guy was like[4:33:19] How is he getting away with wearing that obvious[4:33:21] Hair piece[4:33:23] So if you're bald[4:33:25] They already think you have a hair piece[4:33:27] So you just hair piece and you look the same[4:33:29] Oh yeah I forgot you could just get a hair piece[4:33:31] Which is probably easier than doing gel[4:33:33] In your hair and all this product[4:33:35] Then I don't need to do anything[4:33:37] I could just take the thing that would be[4:33:39] So the second you start thinning[4:33:41] You just shave the full top[4:33:43] Yeah and then you get a great hair piece guy to develop[4:33:45] The coolest hair cut of my life[4:33:47] You could probably get a replica made of exactly how it looks[4:33:49] We should go to the hair piece guy now[4:33:51] And get a nice[4:33:53] And then we could sell them on the store you guys could all look like Indians[4:33:59] I saw a comment in the Instagram the other day that goes[4:34:01] Why does Mike look so Indian[4:34:03] Oh man[4:34:05] I know exactly what that guy is talking about too[4:34:07] And trust me[4:34:09] I am fully against[4:34:11] Somebody looking Indian[4:34:13] So I am right there with you[4:34:15] Someone says Mike you need to stretch your neck and traps[4:34:17] Or else the hairline will recede[4:34:19] Is that real advice[4:34:21] Well then I'm gold[4:34:23] Because my whole neck[4:34:25] I am the only one doing Iron Man[4:34:27] You should see[4:34:29] My neck exercises I went from five pounds[4:34:31] This[4:34:33] Four sets of twelve of this[4:34:35] For five pounds hanging from a chain like this[4:34:37] I'm up to twenty pounds[4:34:39] So before when I first started this[4:34:41] A few months ago[4:34:43] It was a five pound weight around a chain[4:34:45] And you go like this[4:34:47] And I was able to do four sets of twelve[4:34:49] With five pounds and that was my max[4:34:51] Like I was maxed out after that[4:34:53] Now I'm up to twenty pounds[4:34:55] Four sets twelve reps[4:34:57] So I'm progressively[4:34:59] Getting a better neck[4:35:01] Five to twenty pounds on the neck is big[4:35:03] And I think I'm up to like twenty two point five[4:35:05] On my next neck thing[4:35:07] And I love it too[4:35:09] I love the feeling[4:35:11] It's actually very nice[4:35:13] You guys should get this D-Moosh[4:35:15] Neck harness[4:35:17] Get a D-Moosh neck harness[4:35:19] Put some weights on it[4:35:21] And you know you gotta be careful[4:35:23] You gotta snap your neck[4:35:25] Don't be like me I'm running around the house[4:35:27] With big weights hanging from my neck[4:35:29] Alright let's hear more from Joey Diaz[4:35:31] Do not worry about my hair[4:35:33] And furthermore[4:35:35] Most importantly I'm not worried[4:35:37] About my hair[4:35:39] Wait someone says that you do spring shedding[4:35:41] Like a dog[4:35:43] Like now that it's getting super hot[4:35:45] Oh it's summer so it's getting hotter[4:35:47] And I might just be shedding[4:35:49] Keep an eye on that[4:35:51] I'm not going around Mike's losing his hair[4:35:53] That's not what this concept is about at all[4:35:55] So don't start with that[4:35:57] That doesn't mean you've won one over on me[4:35:59] Even me bald[4:36:01] Is better than you at your best[4:36:03] So knock it off[4:36:05] Calm yourselves[4:36:07] Okay you don't need to make[4:36:09] Oh and it's not gonna embarrass me[4:36:11] Okay[4:36:13] Wait they're saying[4:36:15] Put your head down and they can see the bald spot[4:36:17] No we're not doing that[4:36:19] Get your eyes onto him[4:36:21] Eyes onto him[4:36:23] There's no spots[4:36:25] If anything it's a very white graying[4:36:27] Happening[4:36:29] Okay because I'm going Greek[4:36:31] But my gray hairs are about eight times[4:36:33] Thinner than the black ones[4:36:35] So by the time they're all gray[4:36:37] This could be like a skeleton with shooting out pieces[4:36:39] Which[4:36:41] Listen I'm telling you now[4:36:43] I have[4:36:45] The confidence of an[4:36:47] Angel and[4:36:49] Nothing can get to me[4:36:51] Okay I watch Lee[4:36:53] Scipoli videos[4:36:55] Leo remind me guys[4:36:57] To show you if you guys want some motivation in your life[4:36:59] I found this great guy do you guys like[4:37:01] NoHo Hank from Barry[4:37:03] We found the real NoHo Hank on[4:37:05] TikTok his name is Leo[4:37:07] Skeppy[4:37:09] He's a gay guy talk like this[4:37:11] And he gives bullshit motivation that[4:37:13] Hasn't helped anyone and it hasn't helped him[4:37:15] But I'm going to introduce you to him if you[4:37:17] Ever need a pick me up alright back to Joey[4:37:19] Let's hear what he says[4:37:21] Nowhere you know he's a great[4:37:23] Actor he did some great fucking things[4:37:25] But somewhere along the line[4:37:27] He was in[4:37:29] Fucking everything[4:37:31] And I don't know guys[4:37:33] When I got into the movie business[4:37:35] My patterns were people like Eddie Murphy[4:37:37] And shit Eddie Murphy when he[4:37:39] Started had the perfect[4:37:41] Career he did a movie with somebody else[4:37:43] He stole the movie[4:37:45] Then they gave him 48 hours[4:37:47] And he stole that[4:37:49] 21.20 for a little wrap up[4:37:51] 21.20 double[4:37:53] 21.12[4:37:55] 21.20 though[4:37:57] Okay let's hear what he's saying[4:37:59] This is just the ending part[4:38:01] Oh and then they've done this with Joey Diaz which[4:38:03] No this is Hellboy[4:38:05] I was watching this in bed right after I woke up[4:38:07] I literally felt like I was on acid[4:38:09] Yeah this was very[4:38:11] Long enough[4:38:13] Definitely the second[4:38:15] Row all the way to the right[4:38:17] So what we're looking at is like a Brady[4:38:19] Bunch times 10[4:38:21] Style set up of all different AI[4:38:23] Photos of Joey[4:38:25] Set to a grid[4:38:27] And[4:38:29] Which one did you say is your scariest[4:38:31] The middle all the way to the right for sure[4:38:33] This guy?[4:38:35] Right here[4:38:37] And we're watching this and we're really staring[4:38:39] Yeah they start to move[4:38:41] This is what he wishes he was[4:38:43] This like confident[4:38:45] He runs Jersey[4:38:47] You're a little actor bitch boy[4:38:49] Theater bitch[4:38:51] Sorry[4:38:53] You do improv[4:38:55] You're a little actor you read lines[4:38:57] There's no such thing as a mafia guy[4:38:59] Reading a script[4:39:01] You're not in the mafia[4:39:03] You were just a shitty[4:39:05] Shitty person who stole[4:39:07] From people[4:39:09] So it's real easy for these[4:39:11] Gringo pappies here[4:39:13] To pretend that they were like just a cool[4:39:15] You weren't a cool criminal[4:39:17] You were a gay little actor that[4:39:19] Stole from your friends[4:39:21] Remember when you stole money from[4:39:23] What's his name?[4:39:25] The comic who used to do the show with[4:39:27] Joe Rogan[4:39:29] Doug Stanhope[4:39:31] He stole a bunch of money from[4:39:33] Doug Stanhope's house[4:39:35] He admits to this[4:39:37] You're just a thief you steal from[4:39:39] Your friends you're a bad guy[4:39:41] You haven't changed[4:39:43] You just got a bunch of opportunities you[4:39:45] Didn't need to steal[4:39:47] But you're stealing now you're not doing a podcast[4:39:49] And you're taking the Patreon money[4:39:51] You were the same thief[4:39:53] As you always knew you'd be[4:39:55] You'd return to isn't it[4:39:57] He's doing the morning motivation[4:39:59] I bet that his 42nd long clips[4:40:01] Are just him being like get out of bed[4:40:03] I'm no thief anymore[4:40:05] I want to motivate him[4:40:07] That's the only way to motivate him[4:40:09] Is make him think that he's reverting to his old ways[4:40:11] You little baby[4:40:13] In your old ways fears[4:40:15] Imagine[4:40:17] Being such a pussy you're afraid of your old ways[4:40:19] Coming back[4:40:21] I would love if my old ways came back[4:40:23] It set a lot of people straight[4:40:25] People really[4:40:27] Yeah they don't deserve my new ways[4:40:29] Trump[4:40:31] Alright let's hear some more[4:40:33] I don't need any of that shit[4:40:35] So what I'm trying to do here[4:40:37] Is just close the door[4:40:39] Close the door[4:40:41] To see what door opens[4:40:43] What door is going to open?[4:40:45] Nobody's saying I'm shutting down anything[4:40:47] I just want to close one door[4:40:49] To see what opens[4:40:51] I want to see what's out there[4:40:53] I want to see what I've been missing[4:40:55] I'm 60 I want a whole new fucking set of rules man[4:40:57] I want something different in my life[4:40:59] I don't know if it's a podcast[4:41:01] I don't know if it's a movie career[4:41:03] It's none of the above[4:41:05] I just want to be happy[4:41:07] I want to be a good dad now[4:41:09] And that's where I'm at[4:41:11] I fucking love going to these[4:41:13] Oh man these people chasing this happiness huh?[4:41:15] Woohoo[4:41:17] Oh yeah you'll find that by quitting your podcast[4:41:19] Yeah that's it[4:41:21] Just one[4:41:23] Then you'll be happy[4:41:25] How pathetic are these happiness chasers[4:41:27] Oh then I'll be happy[4:41:29] That's all I'm watching all day[4:41:31] Is people trying to figure out[4:41:33] You know you're like Logan Paul[4:41:35] Once I become boxer[4:41:37] Then I'll be happy[4:41:39] Once I become thief[4:41:41] Then I'll be happy[4:41:43] You're never getting happy bro[4:41:45] You know who is truly truly happy?[4:41:47] Those people watching Jelly Roll[4:41:49] No they're in a lot of pain[4:41:51] Physical pain at the show[4:41:53] It's true[4:41:55] I get beat up yesterday[4:41:57] I got thrown around the room[4:41:59] Two weeks ago somebody banged my head off the fucking mat[4:42:01] I fucking had a headache for two days[4:42:03] By the way I've been talking to the[4:42:05] Child Protective Services[4:42:07] They're thinking about letting me be the father of your daughter[4:42:11] They're really talking to me about that[4:42:13] Because I've showed them[4:42:15] Some stuff and they said this guy seems like a better[4:42:17] Ben stop doing jiu-jitsu[4:42:19] You're going to hurt yourself[4:42:21] You can't be doing jiu-jitsu[4:42:23] He wants to roll with you[4:42:25] When you get that back injury[4:42:27] Is it worth it?[4:42:29] Is it going to be worth it to sit in that little room[4:42:31] Listening to your records while you can't move[4:42:33] Your body is not built for this[4:42:35] Take it from us[4:42:37] Joe you've got to stop telling everybody to do jiu-jitsu[4:42:39] I mean really[4:42:41] Why don't you just throw your head into a brick wall[4:42:45] That's the stupidest[4:42:47] That's probably why all these people are getting so stupid[4:42:49] Because Joe's got them all doing jiu-jitsu[4:42:51] They're banging the head every minute[4:42:53] They're running out of air[4:42:55] I feel like fucking one of these guys with[4:42:59] TRT whatever that brain damage is shit[4:43:01] I've been sweating that[4:43:03] But you know what guys I have a good time going there[4:43:05] It's my social life now[4:43:07] I play bocce ball[4:43:09] I enjoy that[4:43:11] It's one night a week[4:43:13] It's fucking 30 minutes with a bunch of old Italians[4:43:15] We're 0-3[4:43:17] We scored our first two points last night[4:43:19] With terrible[4:43:21] I'm just trying to have a good time guys[4:43:23] So I think what we're going to do here[4:43:25] And this is going to take the internet by storm[4:43:27] We're not letting Joey[4:43:29] Quit[4:43:31] So get out there[4:43:33] Start those messages up[4:43:35] Mike Redbar says[4:43:37] You stop whining[4:43:39] You get off your ass[4:43:41] And you get back to work[4:43:43] Those people count on you[4:43:45] Redbar's not letting you quit[4:43:47] That's what I want the message to get[4:43:49] Redbar is not letting Joey[4:43:51] Did you know it was Redbar that got Joey Diaz[4:43:53] To rethink his quitting?[4:43:55] That's what I want the headline to be[4:43:57] Let's start working on that[4:43:59] By next week I want to be[4:44:01] Carried out by the people[4:44:03] Speaking of the Jelly Roll concert[4:44:05] That's the same kind of fans[4:44:07] Joey has[4:44:09] They need him[4:44:11] They need him for motivation[4:44:13] We can't have them out[4:44:15] Finding other things to get involved[4:44:17] You held a nice group[4:44:19] Together just like Jelly Roll[4:44:21] Where without you holding them[4:44:23] Together where would they end up[4:44:25] We don't want them here[4:44:27] We can't have them here it's too confusing[4:44:29] For them[4:44:31] So you got to[4:44:33] Stop with this whining[4:44:35] Don't be a baby[4:44:37] I'm giving you permission[4:44:39] To create[4:44:41] Okay[4:44:43] The world needs[4:44:45] You[4:44:47] Okay[4:44:49] We're going to get them back to work[4:44:51] Okay Joey Diaz everybody very nice[4:44:53] Very nice[4:44:55] And we're going to[4:44:57] You know if you're not putting out content[4:44:59] We're going to make sure that patron gets taken from you[4:45:01] You're breaking the lease[4:45:03] You're breaking the rules[4:45:05] And I know a couple guys at Patreon[4:45:07] They're looking into your account tell them that[4:45:09] Oh my god[4:45:11] Can you imagine how scared he must be[4:45:13] Alright so let's do this now[4:45:15] Did you fix the thing you were doing should we go on a quick little break[4:45:17] It won't fix[4:45:19] So my light board has been disconnected[4:45:21] I think the only way to get this thing back online[4:45:23] Is to restart the router[4:45:25] Which could cause a lot of problems[4:45:27] No we're not doing that[4:45:29] So I don't know why that crapped out on me[4:45:31] Because I had a whole lighting[4:45:33] And especially for the ending performance[4:45:35] Now you're just going to see me in this light[4:45:37] It's very embarrassing[4:45:39] So we had a movie and we wanted to[4:45:41] Talk to you about something that we did[4:45:43] Something we went through[4:45:45] And do you think we should just open the film[4:45:47] We made a little film for you guys[4:45:49] And we wanted to[4:45:51] You know I was going to lower the lights[4:45:53] We were going to watch it together[4:45:55] I was supposed to just introduce the next segment[4:45:57] But now it's a film presentation[4:45:59] Yes this is a film presentation[4:46:01] And it's going to[4:46:03] Lead into our next concept here[4:46:05] So why don't we[4:46:07] Just fire this up and enjoy[4:46:09] A little movie we made for you[4:46:11] Jules and I[4:46:13] Are you ready?[4:46:15] Here we go[4:46:17] The time is 706 pm[4:46:19] Friday May 26[4:46:21] 2023[4:46:23] We were in the parking lot[4:46:25] Of the[4:46:27] Century theaters[4:46:29] Luxury lounges[4:46:31] And we were about to consume[4:46:33] Our first dose of[4:46:35] Psychedelic[4:46:37] Mushrooms[4:46:39] In preparation for[4:46:41] The Machine and Sebastian[4:46:43] Maniscalco's[4:46:45] Family, father[4:46:47] Film[4:46:49] Double feature[4:46:51] And we're about to go in[4:46:53] And purchase our tickets[4:46:57] I once again find myself amazed[4:46:59] By the size[4:47:01] Of the other[4:47:05] I want[4:47:07] The visuals[4:47:09] Of strategy[4:47:11] As I look to the left[4:47:13] And right[4:47:15] Colors from the[4:47:17] Sconses[4:47:19] On the movie theater wall[4:47:21] And every time[4:47:23] I try to turn a lower[4:47:25] At the music[4:47:27] Every time we're in the middle of talking[4:47:29] The trailer ends and goes silent[4:47:31] And the whole place is listening[4:47:33] My brain is just very far[4:47:37] The surroundings are[4:47:39] Starting to[4:47:41] Become[4:47:43] Frightening[4:47:45] We just entered the theater[4:47:47] 757 pm[4:47:49] About 10 minutes[4:47:51] Till showtime 13 minutes[4:47:53] Of course at the theaters[4:47:55] My wife and I[4:47:57] We just finished[4:47:59] Bert Kreischer's The Machine[4:48:01] I give it a 98[4:48:03] It's an incredible film[4:48:05] It changed my life[4:48:07] It's the best movie[4:48:09] I've ever seen[4:48:11] I gotta go talk to my father[4:48:13] What did you think?[4:48:15] That's our experience[4:48:17] At Bert Kreischer's[4:48:19] And Sebastian[4:48:21] Maniscalco's[4:48:23] Family, father[4:48:25] Bert Kreischer's[4:48:27] And Sebastian Maniscalco's[4:48:29] Big opening night[4:48:31] We did a double feature[4:48:33] They came out on the exact same day[4:48:35] So how could we not[4:48:37] We decided to go to a very liminal[4:48:39] Theater[4:48:41] I hope you liked our vlog from that day[4:48:43] And you heard at the beginning what we were doing[4:48:45] In the parking lot[4:48:47] Taking some magic mushrooms[4:48:49] Now this isn't something we do[4:48:51] This isn't something I've ever done[4:48:53] This is another way to enjoy[4:48:55] These two movies back to back[4:48:57] And really see what they're about[4:48:59] On opening night, that was Friday night[4:49:01] Friday night, 8 o'clock[4:49:03] So you saw[4:49:05] Uh oh, he bought three tickets[4:49:07] Oh yes[4:49:09] Three tickets[4:49:11] You always have to buy three tickets[4:49:13] Because that way I don't have to sit next to anybody[4:49:15] I would have bought four[4:49:17] I didn't need to[4:49:19] We were kind of on the aisle here[4:49:21] Three tickets[4:49:23] Thank god we did[4:49:25] Because some asshole jerk would have been right there[4:49:27] Because there was a guy on the next seat[4:49:29] He would have been right in your lap[4:49:31] You know at the movie theaters now[4:49:33] And I love this[4:49:35] I don't know if it's like[4:49:37] I just learned about all this[4:49:39] I'm not a movie going guy[4:49:41] I get too uncomfortable at the theater[4:49:43] I don't like the seats, I don't like sitting there[4:49:45] I don't like being with the people[4:49:47] The theaters they got here at the Century[4:49:49] They've torn the whole theater out[4:49:51] There's only about 35 seats now[4:49:53] And they're all luxury loungers[4:49:55] Now yeah, maybe that's been the story[4:49:57] At your theater the whole time[4:49:59] You pick your seats in advance[4:50:01] This isn't the special alcohol[4:50:03] Oh, they serve alcohol at the theater[4:50:05] If you're drinking during the movie, screw you[4:50:07] That's disgusting[4:50:09] You don't drink during a movie[4:50:11] That's gross[4:50:13] That's disgusting to sit there and drink[4:50:15] But they've got the luxury[4:50:17] recliners[4:50:19] And you sit in them[4:50:21] They're more comfortable than most people's couches[4:50:23] They're more comfortable than our bed[4:50:25] Really, they're really comfortable[4:50:27] Now[4:50:29] There were smears[4:50:31] See, I'm like a Howie Mandel type guy[4:50:33] Where ever since COVID[4:50:35] Any little smear[4:50:37] Like if I see a fingerprint[4:50:39] On something in public[4:50:41] That to me is grease[4:50:43] That's someone's grease[4:50:45] That's not just a fingerprint[4:50:47] That's somebody's griming grease[4:50:49] That has left a mark[4:50:51] So think about how many marks are out there[4:50:53] So when you go to those theaters[4:50:55] Don't start putting your face on the leather[4:50:57] And really cuddling up[4:50:59] Remember you're sitting in somebody else's farts[4:51:01] Somebody else's sweat[4:51:03] Somebody else's little movements[4:51:05] And stuff like that[4:51:07] But I'll tell you[4:51:09] I've never been more comfortable at the theater[4:51:11] We're going to start going a lot[4:51:13] We had a blast[4:51:15] We took these mushrooms in the parking lot[4:51:17] We get in, we buy the three tickets[4:51:19] So we get to Burt Kreischer's movie[4:51:21] Three other people in the room[4:51:23] That's it[4:51:25] So the whole place is[4:51:27] This is 8 o'clock[4:51:29] Opening night of the machine[4:51:31] The big movie's been promoting it[4:51:33] You know, Burt thought this movie[4:51:35] Was going to do $125 million[4:51:37] Opening weekend[4:51:39] I think it did[4:51:41] What did it do? $600 grand?[4:51:43] It was a box office[4:51:45] Box![4:51:47] So[4:51:49] We do the mushrooms[4:51:51] I gotta say[4:51:53] This was the best movie going experience I've ever done[4:51:55] We're going to be doing this like every week[4:51:57] I'm like addicted[4:51:59] I was having the time of my life[4:52:01] The fear and the[4:52:03] The surprise nature[4:52:05] Of what the mushrooms[4:52:07] Bring to the theater going experience[4:52:09] Makes it like[4:52:11] You're on the Star Wars ride at Disney World[4:52:13] This is a big[4:52:15] Good ride[4:52:17] Everything is scary[4:52:19] When the people next to us in the theater started[4:52:21] Giggling and doing their little cackling[4:52:23] Like it was all quiet and then during the[4:52:25] Trailers they start going[4:52:27] It really, I mean everything[4:52:29] Turns bizarre[4:52:31] You're in a horror scene[4:52:33] Where Burt really gets lucky here is though[4:52:35] We were on[4:52:37] Mushroom so[4:52:39] His movie was[4:52:41] It's baked into me[4:52:43] Like an old dream[4:52:45] I mean it's[4:52:47] I'm one[4:52:49] With the machine[4:52:51] And I'm here to set the record straight about[4:52:53] How good was this movie[4:52:55] It was amazing[4:52:57] We give it a[4:52:59] 98 is what we ranked it[4:53:01] On Rotten Tomatoes[4:53:03] If we were on Rotten Tomatoes setting the scores[4:53:05] It would be set to 98[4:53:07] This thing had it all[4:53:09] If you liked John Wick[4:53:11] This was better than[4:53:13] John Wick, no different[4:53:15] These guys[4:53:17] They love John Wick, they hate the machine[4:53:19] It's the same movie, same tube lights[4:53:21] Same Russians, it's got all the stuff[4:53:23] So here's what nobody's talking about[4:53:25] You know Sebastian Maniscalco[4:53:27] And Burt[4:53:29] Opened on the same night, first of all I can't[4:53:31] Believe that and both movies were about[4:53:33] Fathers, I didn't even know[4:53:35] The machine was a father story[4:53:37] Neither, I hate that part[4:53:39] That was the worst part of the movie so he gets[4:53:41] And I think we've got some clips here[4:53:45] What would be the first Burt clip[4:53:47] That I could show[4:53:49] You know to kind of weave this story[4:53:51] Through[4:53:53] Did you want to do that first one of his expectations[4:53:55] Yeah sure[4:53:57] So he does the movie, I didn't know this[4:53:59] It was the guy from Star Wars[4:54:01] Am I saying his name right?[4:54:03] Mark Hamill[4:54:05] Sure, I don't know him[4:54:07] That's how little I'm into this[4:54:09] I don't know anything about it[4:54:11] I am not a fan of Star Wars[4:54:13] We're Potter heads[4:54:15] No we are not[4:54:17] That's not true at all[4:54:19] Don't be telling people that I[4:54:21] Fucking can't stand the wizarding[4:54:23] World of Potter[4:54:25] I find that to be a dreary[4:54:27] Mess of a film[4:54:29] And a book, I hate the books more[4:54:31] Yeah[4:54:33] I can't stand that[4:54:35] The scene that his dad appeared in[4:54:37] So the first time you see Mark Hamill as the dad[4:54:39] In Burt's movie[4:54:41] It's this wood garage thing[4:54:43] That they're in talking about some bullshit[4:54:45] I don't really know the dialogue of the movie[4:54:47] Yeah it's Burt's studio[4:54:49] It's supposed to be his man cave[4:54:51] His dad, since it was all wood walls[4:54:53] His dad turned into wood[4:54:55] One of the wood panels on the wall[4:54:57] To you[4:54:59] Because of the mushrooms[4:55:01] He was moving in and out of the wood[4:55:03] And then for the rest of the movie[4:55:05] He became this complete[4:55:07] Creature, almost like a golem[4:55:09] Entity[4:55:11] As far as an actor, he was out of line[4:55:13] His script was terrible[4:55:15] So to me the movie was[4:55:17] Burt being followed to Russia by this[4:55:19] Entity that he had to get off his back[4:55:21] Again, we had no idea this was a[4:55:23] Father movie, I guess this was Father's Day[4:55:25] Weekend they both released[4:55:27] So did you guys know that Sebastian[4:55:29] Maybe we should show the trailer for Sebastian's movie[4:55:31] Sebastian's movie[4:55:33] Is called About My Father[4:55:35] Starring Sebastian and I thought[4:55:37] He was going to be playing himself, no he plays[4:55:39] A shitty[4:55:41] Guy[4:55:43] Who works at the Hilton[4:55:45] And his dad is played by[4:55:47] Robert De Niro[4:55:49] Who, just like in Burt's movie[4:55:51] They wrote[4:55:53] Horribly, I mean they really made[4:55:55] An ass out of the dads[4:55:57] In both these movies[4:55:59] You know, they're taking Robert De Niro[4:56:01] They're making him like[4:56:03] Insane, like the moves that he's[4:56:05] Doing are insane, like he[4:56:07] I'm going to spoil the movie here[4:56:09] For About My Father, they go[4:56:11] It's basically Meet the Fockers[4:56:13] Right, it's basically Meet the Fockers[4:56:15] So it's about[4:56:17] Sebastian[4:56:19] Going to meet his[4:56:21] Future wife's[4:56:23] Family, they're both in their 50's[4:56:25] So I don't know why he's even getting married[4:56:27] In this movie[4:56:29] Like the movie's almost written as if they're supposed to be like[4:56:31] 25[4:56:33] But they're both in their 50's[4:56:35] So it's Sebastian and his fiance[4:56:37] Going to meet[4:56:39] The rich fiance's[4:56:41] Parents with Sebastian[4:56:43] And his shitty Italian dad[4:56:45] And then the Meet the Fockers[4:56:47] Stuff, but this movie[4:56:49] Was so poorly written[4:56:51] They go and[4:56:53] The family was wonderful[4:56:55] The only thing wrong[4:56:57] In this movie was Sebastian[4:56:59] Acting like a complete asshole[4:57:01] By the way, Sebastian[4:57:03] Barely did any[4:57:05] Acting in this movie[4:57:07] He sat around like a lump[4:57:09] While this poor De Niro[4:57:11] Was forced to carry this movie[4:57:13] That you know he knows[4:57:15] Was one of the worst movies of his career[4:57:17] Let's show that trailer[4:57:19] So you can see what this movie was like[4:57:21] Guys, I can't recommend[4:57:23] Going to see these movies[4:57:25] Back to back enough[4:57:27] Screw yourself up on something, get twisted[4:57:29] I actually think Burt[4:57:31] Is messing this up here, so everyone's[4:57:33] Playing on the movie, everyone's saying Burt's movie[4:57:35] Sucks, blah blah blah, waste of time[4:57:37] If Burt can get into people's heads[4:57:39] Go to the theater on mushrooms[4:57:41] For a double feature of the machine[4:57:43] And about my father[4:57:45] About my father is so bad[4:57:47] Compared[4:57:49] Coming out of it, Burt is the king[4:57:51] Burt's the king and that's why we're here today[4:57:53] Saying this movie ruled[4:57:55] Of course we saw Burt's movie first[4:57:57] Right as the visuals were kicking[4:57:59] Yeah, but[4:58:01] Sebastian's movie came[4:58:03] All you need to know, and Burt could use this to his advantage[4:58:05] Because he's kind of fighting for his life right now[4:58:07] Trying to, you know, this is not going well for him[4:58:09] He's getting a lot of hate, we'll show you that[4:58:11] He really, his expectations[4:58:13] Were big, I'll play you that clip[4:58:15] And then we'll watch this trailer, let's listen to[4:58:17] Burt's expectations[4:58:19] Watching that day fucking like fart away[4:58:21] 18 seconds in?[4:58:23] Yeah, it's like right at the beginning, but just skip their opening[4:58:25] Little edit[4:58:27] Okay, here we go, 18 seconds[4:58:29] Here, this was filmed like[4:58:31] Right before[4:58:33] The movie was released[4:58:35] Light up, like someone brought a bottle of rosé in the room[4:58:37] And he goes, sold[4:58:39] And he's not kidding[4:58:41] Everyone was asking me[4:58:43] What do you want[4:58:45] Like what are your expectations for the movie[4:58:47] Like opening weekend[4:58:49] Or financially, I go[4:58:51] Honestly, 152 million[4:58:53] Are you serious?[4:58:55] And this was a recent[4:58:57] Question, he's only laughing because[4:58:59] They said, no, no, no, that's like Spider-Man[4:59:01] Numbers[4:59:03] But he's thinking in his head like, well, okay[4:59:05] 60 million, 70 million[4:59:07] I mean, he really had it in his head[4:59:09] That this was gonna be big[4:59:11] reasonable, yeah[4:59:13] And I didn't know what that was[4:59:15] And then someone goes, you mean[4:59:17] Bigger than Maverick?[4:59:19] Wow[4:59:21] Well, that's gonna be good, that's gonna be really good[4:59:23] And then[4:59:25] And then they put it in perspective[4:59:27] And I was like, okay, but[4:59:29] If we do 152 million[4:59:31] Which I'm looking at[4:59:33] That's our threshold[4:59:35] I got some big PT Barnum[4:59:37] Stuff I want to pull out a week ago[4:59:39] That's what I'm talking about[4:59:41] That's what we need[4:59:43] I'm checking into rehab the day before[4:59:45] She goes, what? And I said, I'm gonna fucking[4:59:47] Pull some Dave Chappelle, run to South Africa[4:59:49] Where's Burt? Fuck no[4:59:51] What's going on?[4:59:53] And then I'll go buy that house in Serbia[4:59:57] I'm gonna buy the house[4:59:59] You're gonna buy it?[5:00:01] I'm telling you, and I've watched a lot of this content[5:00:03] That's the best we could pull, but he really[5:00:05] Had high hopes[5:00:07] For this film, it did not go that way[5:00:09] We'll show you how it went[5:00:11] And what he's dealing with and how we[5:00:13] Can help him out of this[5:00:15] Because Sebastian's movie, he should be[5:00:17] Focusing on the fact that[5:00:19] This was so[5:00:21] Much worse, let's take a look[5:00:23] Hey Beth, check it out, I can dive![5:00:25] Sebastian, you're soup![5:00:29] About my father[5:00:31] My parents are inviting us to the summer place[5:00:33] For the big 4th of July weekend[5:00:35] I can't leave my father[5:00:37] This is the first summer since we have to[5:00:39] Say goodbye to your dear mother and you're gonna[5:00:41] Leave me to Bernie's father's and eat hot dogs alone[5:00:43] Why don't we just bring him?[5:00:45] Nah, I don't think so[5:00:47] You're bringing him[5:00:49] He's worried his immigrant father's gonna[5:00:51] Make him look like some kind of goomba[5:00:53] Listen, if we're gonna do this, Dad, you gotta[5:00:55] Dial it down[5:00:57] That was about the most he[5:00:59] Performed in the whole movie[5:01:01] The rest of the movie was him sitting there like this[5:01:03] While everybody worked, you could tell[5:01:05] The other actors were like[5:01:07] He's the star of this movie[5:01:09] There were some scenes that he was barely even in[5:01:11] And didn't have any lines[5:01:13] He was like the 6th lead in this movie[5:01:15] When you first saw Sebastian, weren't you like[5:01:17] Oh, this is bombastic[5:01:19] He hates everybody[5:01:21] He's got so many complaints[5:01:23] He's a wise guy[5:01:25] But he doesn't play that at all anymore[5:01:27] I keep telling Jules this because Jules is so shocked[5:01:29] She thought Sebastian was like[5:01:31] This guy was really gonna go for it[5:01:33] And I thought about it[5:01:35] And I've noticed this in a lot of Sebastian's[5:01:37] Interviews and stuff lately[5:01:39] It's almost like he peaked two years ago[5:01:41] And he's just kind of[5:01:43] Given up[5:01:45] You know, like he did that big pandering[5:01:47] To Italians thing[5:01:49] He got big only because the stupid Italians wanted to go out[5:01:51] And laugh about another Italian[5:01:53] You know, with all that stupid[5:01:55] Horse shit Italian trope stuff that he was doing[5:01:57] That was the only reason he got big[5:01:59] And then he kind of[5:02:01] Like forgot that[5:02:03] Yeah, they want you to keep pandering[5:02:05] Like in order for this to last[5:02:07] You gotta be the[5:02:09] You can't just be the street man[5:02:11] No, you gotta be the[5:02:13] Larry the cable guy of Italians[5:02:15] Like that's the only way this works[5:02:17] And he kind of like forgot that[5:02:19] That was the deal[5:02:21] And he kind of just puttered out[5:02:23] He didn't give anything in this movie[5:02:25] Let's watch this trailer some more[5:02:27] Get a vibe of this thing[5:02:29] I love this, this is bringing back good memories for me[5:02:31] What is this?[5:02:33] Welcome to White Oak[5:02:35] Wow, this is amazing[5:02:37] It's called love and affection then[5:02:41] Unlike you, when you met me at the delivery room[5:02:43] You chose to shake my hand[5:02:45] What else was I supposed to do? We just met[5:02:47] Sebastian, I don't know how you're gonna fit in[5:02:49] Where's my teeth?[5:02:51] Where's my teeth?[5:02:53] Don't these people have jobs?[5:02:55] They got their money in the stock market[5:02:57] Not in mayonnaise jars buried in their backyard[5:02:59] Not in mayonnaise jars buried in[5:03:01] You know this[5:03:03] This fantasy[5:03:05] That you're Joe Pesci[5:03:07] That everybody's the good fellas[5:03:09] It's gotta end[5:03:11] Also, you know the movies where you're like[5:03:13] Oh my god, my dad is here, he's so embarrassing[5:03:15] And his other family, the dad did nothing wrong[5:03:17] No, the dad was fine[5:03:19] His writing got a little psychotic towards the end[5:03:21] Where the dad ends up killing the family bird[5:03:23] To make dinner[5:03:25] I mean, it got really weird[5:03:27] He cuts the fiance's mom's haircut[5:03:33] He cuts all her hair off[5:03:35] And then she's wearing a fake wig[5:03:37] That looks like it was all cut off[5:03:39] I mean, it was really atrocious[5:03:41] Like, you feel bad for De Niro[5:03:43] That he was dragged through this[5:03:45] And like, you could tell, it's on De Niro's face the whole time[5:03:47] You know, and[5:03:49] We'll show you some of these clips of Sebastian and De Niro[5:03:51] On like the Today Show[5:03:53] Where they're dragging De Niro around[5:03:55] To do these press junctions[5:03:57] Junkets[5:03:59] For the movie coming up[5:04:01] And you could tell it's like, Sebastian[5:04:03] I can't believe you did this to him[5:04:05] You're a hero![5:04:07] I just hope nothing gets stolen this weekend[5:04:09] Because these people love to blame the immigrants[5:04:11] We'll give you the grand tour[5:04:13] This is Doug[5:04:15] Hello[5:04:17] Just serenading our pet peacock[5:04:19] This guy was great[5:04:21] I love you[5:04:23] These people are strange[5:04:25] They're birds for pets[5:04:27] Peacocks are just a bunch of goddamn show-offs if you ask me[5:04:29] And I saw some people saying it looked cheap[5:04:31] Especially after the beauty[5:04:33] The cinematic masterpiece[5:04:35] Of La Machine[5:04:39] You know, the machine was shot[5:04:41] So beautifully[5:04:43] It was gorgeous[5:04:45] Now this machine[5:04:47] Had a lot of issues with it[5:04:49] But Burt, don't worry about those[5:04:51] No, but I don't know what Burt's gonna do[5:04:53] Like, how's Burt?[5:04:55] Burt thinks like[5:04:57] No person[5:04:59] No normal person[5:05:01] Even his fans, they're not gonna suggest[5:05:03] For somebody to see this movie[5:05:05] After seeing it[5:05:07] Like, if you're not a Burt fan[5:05:09] There's nothing in this movie[5:05:11] For you[5:05:13] Like, Burt's in a lot of trouble here[5:05:15] I mean, he put all his eggs[5:05:17] Into this basket here[5:05:19] He was making a lot of plans[5:05:21] For his new movie star life[5:05:23] I don't know if that's gonna go as[5:05:25] Well, you wanna know this?[5:05:27] I'm sure Burt's movie would suck ass[5:05:29] If you weren't on mushrooms[5:05:31] But what you can say is[5:05:33] At least Burt was himself in the movie[5:05:35] And brought Burt to the movie[5:05:37] Yes, oh yes[5:05:39] Burt really did the best that he could[5:05:41] I'm not kidding[5:05:43] I mean, Burt did the best that he could[5:05:45] Sebastian just sat there like an asshole[5:05:47] Wasting everybody's time[5:05:49] Here's the headline, though[5:05:51] After the opening weekend[5:05:53] Three new original movies bombed[5:05:55] At the Memorial Day box office[5:05:57] And that's a problem[5:05:59] And then it's got Burt and[5:06:01] Jessie Mae Paluso, of course[5:06:03] She was wonderful[5:06:05] This woman who played the Russian[5:06:07] You guys gotta see this movie[5:06:09] I'm not kidding[5:06:11] He was absolutely[5:06:13] Out of line and inappropriate[5:06:15] I mean, this guy, this Mark Hamill[5:06:17] This was like watching a guy[5:06:19] Who had never done a movie before[5:06:21] His skin was like modeling it[5:06:23] There was a scene where he didn't even have legs[5:06:25] There was many things happening to him[5:06:27] Was there anything in this article[5:06:29] That was funny to read or just the headline?[5:06:31] No, just the headline is enough[5:06:33] Where should we go next, Jo?[5:06:35] Oh, did you want to see Sebastian on the Today show[5:06:37] Before you mean that?[5:06:39] Let's see this, this is really pathetic[5:06:41] Here's what's going on[5:06:43] And they know the movie was a stinker[5:06:45] I'd like to[5:06:47] You know, Burt's getting it up the ass from everybody[5:06:49] Because he's the loud guy, right?[5:06:51] But Sebastian[5:06:53] Should be the one being tortured[5:06:55] Nobody is messaging Sebastian[5:06:57] Ha ha, that stunk[5:06:59] I think we gotta get on that[5:07:01] Let's start[5:07:03] Dude, Red Bar went to your movie opening weekend[5:07:05] He told us all the secrets[5:07:07] He showed us[5:07:09] And by the way, Sebastian's movie[5:07:11] Burt's movie had three people in it[5:07:13] Sebastian's?[5:07:15] Zero[5:07:17] We didn't have to buy three tickets[5:07:19] For Sebastian's[5:07:21] We went to Burt's first, bought three tickets[5:07:23] So we could block off a seat[5:07:25] We go to buy Sebastian, I go, three tickets[5:07:27] Three tickets to the guy, he goes, three tickets, okay[5:07:29] And then we realize[5:07:31] There's no one else in the theater[5:07:33] You know, the movie's[5:07:35] Just about to start, there's nobody else in the theater[5:07:37] So we go, oh, actually, just two tickets[5:07:39] Ha ha[5:07:41] So the guy must have been like, your friend is not coming?[5:07:43] I mean, people are gonna hate me for saying this[5:07:45] But I kind of have the same feeling[5:07:47] About Burt that I do about Brendan[5:07:49] It's like, yeah, he fucking sucks[5:07:51] And there's so many things to make fun of him about[5:07:53] But I think the people who target Burt so much[5:07:55] You're going for the easy[5:07:57] Yeah, well, Burt is being picked on[5:07:59] A lot lately[5:08:01] Again, it's the same thing as Brendan and Brian Callan[5:08:03] Everybody picks on Brendan[5:08:05] Callan's the guy you should be going for[5:08:07] It's the same thing with Burt and Tom[5:08:09] Everybody picks on Brendan[5:08:11] Tom is the guy[5:08:13] Or Sebastian in this case[5:08:15] Yes, that you should be going for it[5:08:17] They always pick on the weak[5:08:19] Okay, I'm here to stand up for the weak[5:08:21] Burt, you're the weak in this case[5:08:23] Let's see Sebastian[5:08:25] Try to sell this movie with DeNiro on the Today Show[5:08:29] We're back, two big stars here in Studio 1A[5:08:31] Look, DeNiro's already picked[5:08:33] Look at DeNiro's face in this[5:08:35] Look[5:08:37] I mean, he's an old man[5:08:39] He doesn't want to be dragged[5:08:41] And they made him do like 50 of these[5:08:43] To promote the movie[5:08:45] And he does all the heavy lifting in the movie[5:08:47] Sebastian, you should be ashamed[5:08:49] We're back, two big stars here in Studio 1A[5:08:51] The man who's been called the hottest comic in America[5:08:53] Sebastian Maniscalco[5:08:55] Yep, he's[5:08:57] Well, he didn't show any of that to me[5:08:59] You know, he's sitting there[5:09:01] He's not a dummy[5:09:03] I know he's been really stupid lately[5:09:05] But I'm sure he knows what acting looks like[5:09:07] Right?[5:09:09] So when he's on the set with Sebastian[5:09:11] And he's just watching this asshole[5:09:13] With this bad writing and bad acting[5:09:17] And all the work that he had to do in the movie[5:09:19] Robert DeNiro is still giving[5:09:21] Yeah, Robert DeNiro's still[5:09:23] Yeah, he did his job[5:09:25] He's enjoying, he's enjoyable to see[5:09:27] The only thing that was bad was the writing[5:09:29] As far as he was concerned, he didn't blow it[5:09:31] In the editing, they did some[5:09:33] Bad editing of the old man[5:09:35] He even did a scene where he like cried[5:09:37] Cried and teared up about being Sebastian's[5:09:39] Father, and it's like you're putting in[5:09:41] All that work for this[5:09:43] He had to hang out with Sebastian's dad for[5:09:45] Months to get the role right[5:09:47] I mean, he could die tomorrow and this could be[5:09:49] The last movie he ever does[5:09:51] And they're telling him in his ear[5:09:53] Sebastian's the hottest comic out[5:09:55] Sebastian's the biggest, best comic[5:09:57] And he's going, okay[5:09:59] Everybody's telling me this is the biggest comic[5:10:01] This is going to be the biggest movie of the year[5:10:03] Great![5:10:05] And meanwhile, look what you did to him[5:10:07] Here, you can see his pain in this[5:10:09] Oh, and two-time Oscar winner[5:10:11] Robert DeNiro[5:10:13] Sebastian's Italian immigrant father[5:10:15] Was often the main inspiration for[5:10:17] Sebastian's stand-up act[5:10:19] Well now, he's taking his life story to the big screen[5:10:21] And he's picked on for this[5:10:23] Called About My Father, DeNiro stars[5:10:25] As his dad, Salvo[5:10:27] And when Sebastian says he's spending the 4th of July weekend[5:10:29] With his girlfriend's wealthy family[5:10:31] At their summer home[5:10:33] Salvo does not take the news so well[5:10:35] So they got more money[5:10:37] Than us, who doesn't?[5:10:39] Plus, it's just for one weekend[5:10:41] Oh, one weekend, he says, one weekend[5:10:43] Fifty years ago, I come to this country[5:10:45] To give you a better life[5:10:47] Fifty years ago, I skipped[5:10:49] One weekend in Sicily for you[5:10:51] I joined the US Army to protect your freedoms[5:10:53] And what thanks do I get?[5:10:55] You go celebrate the 4th of July with some other family[5:10:57] Leaving me to burn the sparklers and eat the hot dogs alone[5:10:59] It's so stupid[5:11:01] Alone! Alone![5:11:03] Hi Sebastian![5:11:05] When they cut back[5:11:07] Alone! Alone![5:11:09] Look at this, dude[5:11:11] Look[5:11:13] I mean[5:11:15] He doesn't have that much time left[5:11:17] You're just okay with burning down[5:11:19] An icon living?[5:11:21] This is like how Ray Liotta's last movie[5:11:23] Was coke and beer[5:11:25] I mean, it really is[5:11:27] Somebody needs to step in and put a stop to this[5:11:29] You're gonna make him[5:11:31] Play this dirty muncha?[5:11:33] Yeah, maybe now that burned him out[5:11:35] From doing any movies anymore[5:11:37] You know, cause he could be great[5:11:39] Put into the right role[5:11:41] And it's just such a shame to see[5:11:43] This is the end of De Niro because of you[5:11:45] Mr. Makeup Man[5:11:47] I know, talk about lipstick[5:11:49] Look at the makeup he's wearing[5:11:51] I mean, here's[5:11:53] And he's wearing makeup, right?[5:11:55] Just the normal makeup they put on you to be on the Today Show[5:11:57] But look at this[5:11:59] This is at home makeup[5:12:01] He does his own[5:12:03] My wife's got a Sephora in the front seat[5:12:05] Yeah, it's for you[5:12:07] It's all your stuff[5:12:09] You're wearing matte lip[5:12:11] Color[5:12:13] You go, I'm even doing up my lips[5:12:17] You know, it's very normal to put powder on[5:12:19] Anti-shine[5:12:21] Like in Burt's movie, everything the Burt character did[5:12:23] You're like, of course, that's what Burt would do[5:12:25] Makes perfect sense[5:12:27] But in Sebastian's movie, he was like with his wife[5:12:29] Putting on an avocado mask[5:12:31] And be like, nobody told me how amazing it is to wear[5:12:33] And it's like, but you hate me[5:12:35] You hate avocado[5:12:37] He doesn't know who he is[5:12:39] Guys, we got an easy target right here[5:12:41] We could really make Sebastian[5:12:43] Act out right now[5:12:45] Let's hit him while times are low[5:12:47] This is the time to red bar Sebastian[5:12:49] Get into those guys[5:12:51] Get into Sebastian's comments[5:12:53] His messages, let's see[5:12:55] Cause he's at his lowest right now[5:12:57] Let's give him a scare, let's see what he does[5:12:59] I think we could get him to do something[5:13:01] George Janko could have injected[5:13:03] More personality into this role[5:13:05] Yes, yes[5:13:07] So really get creative with the comments[5:13:09] Let's see if we could get Sebastian[5:13:11] Remember, this is all bad news[5:13:13] From his movie career is done[5:13:15] There's no more Sebastian movies coming[5:13:17] He thought this would be the start of a new[5:13:19] He was going to be a big star[5:13:21] He didn't try[5:13:23] You see him in this movie, you go[5:13:25] You took this opportunity[5:13:27] To have a movie with De Niro and you just sat there[5:13:29] Like a pud[5:13:31] He didn't bring it[5:13:33] He thinks that if you saw him[5:13:35] Three years ago on his[5:13:37] Big tour that he did enough[5:13:39] And now he could just like[5:13:41] Chill and you're going to give him[5:13:43] Props just cause he used to do[5:13:45] Something really good[5:13:47] But to the movie going audience[5:13:49] We're meeting you for the first time[5:13:51] Like this should be your big debut[5:13:53] You gotta try, you gotta show everybody[5:13:55] What you are[5:13:57] Bert showed everybody who he was[5:13:59] Bert gave it his all[5:14:01] Maybe you hate him, but it was him[5:14:03] Bert gave it his all, it was a great showing[5:14:05] But it was like[5:14:07] It was Bert, you were watching Bert[5:14:09] It didn't look like he was acting, it was like[5:14:11] You were watching a really[5:14:13] Well shot vlog of[5:14:15] Bert's life[5:14:17] I love that machine[5:14:19] The shock of seeing Bert on the big screen[5:14:21] While on Shrew doesn't matter[5:14:23] But this is the reviewer sticking to[5:14:25] I'll tell you this[5:14:27] I don't watch movies twice[5:14:29] I will be watching La Machina[5:14:31] As soon as it comes to[5:14:33] On Apple[5:14:35] And by the way[5:14:37] You know how when you go on Apple iTunes and you see[5:14:39] John Wick[5:14:41] It's not available for rent[5:14:43] But it's available to buy for[5:14:45] $34.99[5:14:47] And you go who the fuck would buy that[5:14:49] When for rent it's going to be $4.99[5:14:51] We buy the movies[5:14:53] We can't wait[5:14:55] No, you know what one we paid $34.99 for?[5:14:57] The Mario movie[5:14:59] The Mario movie[5:15:01] And we'll turn these movies off[5:15:03] So we[5:15:05] That's what we do, we don't have the patience[5:15:07] We just buy the movie[5:15:09] Because they play this game with you[5:15:11] On the iTunes store[5:15:13] Where it's like[5:15:15] Hey look, John Wick 4 is out[5:15:17] And then you go look[5:15:19] Oh it's pre-order[5:15:21] Only[5:15:23] And that's crazy, we do not pre-order[5:15:25] Digital movies[5:15:27] That's insane[5:15:29] You know somebody psychotic[5:15:31] Do you think there's not going to be enough[5:15:33] Digital versions available[5:15:35] And they're going to run out[5:15:37] What if you don't like John Wick[5:15:39] In four months[5:15:41] Anymore? Did you even think about that?[5:15:43] Pre-ordering[5:15:45] On iTunes[5:15:47] Please show me those people[5:15:49] They play the game with us[5:15:51] We buy it immediately, we want to watch[5:15:53] I love that Mario movie was really[5:15:55] Poorly written[5:15:57] Really bad, with Ana Diarmaz[5:15:59] Anya Taylor-Joy[5:16:01] As the princess, what did they need to pay money[5:16:03] For that? Alright let's watch a little bit[5:16:05] Hi Sebastian[5:16:07] Hey Bob, good morning, good to see you[5:16:09] Ok look, this is your passion project[5:16:11] You've been wanting to do this forever[5:16:13] That's beautiful[5:16:15] Then you want someone to play your father[5:16:17] You choose the most wonderful[5:16:19] Person on earth, how did this ass come[5:16:21] How did this come to be[5:16:23] Does this fucking black girl[5:16:25] From the hood need to be here[5:16:27] For this? She should be in[5:16:29] School She doesn't know who you are[5:16:31] She doesn't even know who DeNiro is[5:16:33] She's too black[5:16:35] Ok[5:16:37] Put something on for her[5:16:41] This is boring her to[5:16:43] Death[5:16:45] I have a picture very similar to like this[5:16:47] From the[5:16:51] From the zoo[5:16:53] Like if there was[5:16:55] Grass here[5:16:57] And they were naked[5:17:01] Pretty similar to some of my[5:17:03] Funny zoo photos[5:17:07] The gorilla[5:17:09] Behind glass, that's why you shouldn't be caught[5:17:11] Behind glass You can't be a black person[5:17:13] Behind glass[5:17:17] What do they call it? It's not a cage[5:17:19] It's a enclosure[5:17:21] Not enclosure[5:17:23] A habitat[5:17:25] Nigga looking like she in a[5:17:27] Habitat[5:17:29] That's their fault though[5:17:31] You know I blame them[5:17:33] And then this white guy here I'm surprised you're not taking pictures of them[5:17:35] Renee D'Ambrosio[5:17:37] Why are you posing and looking at yourself in the camera[5:17:39] Look at these fucking losers[5:17:41] If you stand behind the Today Show you need to be executed[5:17:43] I mean this old man doesn't give a fuck[5:17:45] You just don't give a fuck what it is[5:17:47] You're just so excited[5:17:49] Well that's De Niro[5:17:51] What was that beep boop bop[5:17:53] In this union[5:17:55] So I met Bob on the Irishman[5:17:57] The movie that we did and then he had[5:17:59] Come to your show at Radio City[5:18:01] But I don't even have his phone number[5:18:03] It's not like I called him up one morning[5:18:05] Going Bob you want to do my movie[5:18:07] As my father[5:18:09] But he got the script[5:18:11] You need to stop talking like that[5:18:13] You're from the suburbs of Chicago[5:18:15] No one talks like that there[5:18:17] And I don't go[5:18:25] Lose the accent[5:18:27] It sounds silly[5:18:29] And that type of person[5:18:31] Is way down on the charts now[5:18:33] That type of Italian[5:18:35] We got to tell them about what Josh Denny said[5:18:37] With this whole Sopranos lifestyle[5:18:39] That these guys are living[5:18:41] This Sopranos is so over you[5:18:43] It's not even rewatchable[5:18:45] Because of how foolish Italians[5:18:47] Have become[5:18:49] I have very little respect for it[5:18:51] Italians to me are like Jelly Roll's audience[5:18:53] Another group of people I want out[5:18:55] People think[5:18:57] You can only be racist against[5:18:59] The blacks[5:19:01] Guys there's a lot of these white groups[5:19:03] That are way worse[5:19:05] The white trash, the Italians[5:19:07] Those are groups[5:19:09] That need a getting[5:19:11] Whites and he[5:19:13] Read it and enjoyed it[5:19:15] Look at his hair[5:19:17] Today's show[5:19:19] He's miserable[5:19:21] Do you think he was really funny[5:19:23] When you saw his stand up act?[5:19:25] No[5:19:27] He's serious[5:19:29] He doesn't have to lie[5:19:33] He probably did[5:19:35] They told me this guy was the top stand up[5:19:37] But I watched it and they go[5:19:39] He's seen better stuff[5:19:41] He's played[5:19:43] A better comedian than you[5:19:45] That Sebastian smile is crazy[5:19:47] Hey[5:19:49] He's kind of a[5:19:51] Phoney[5:19:53] Sebastian needs to get a little[5:19:55] Payback[5:19:57] For how he's been[5:19:59] And the movie didn't even make any sense[5:20:01] Because Sebastian was playing himself[5:20:03] With grey hair at like 49[5:20:05] But the plot of the movie was[5:20:07] Him getting engaged[5:20:09] And being poor[5:20:11] And bringing his dad over to his wife's house[5:20:13] Who's rich but it's like you're not poor[5:20:15] It really was off[5:20:17] Here's a collage from Xander[5:20:19] Of the empty theaters[5:20:21] From Bert's movie[5:20:23] Opening night[5:20:25] It's just a collage of empty theaters[5:20:27] That's such a shame[5:20:29] Here's what's so cute about it[5:20:31] Bert, as a comic[5:20:33] He's been selling out shows[5:20:35] For the last 10 years[5:20:37] There's not a show that he hasn't put up[5:20:39] That hasn't sold out[5:20:41] He's used to having a very big fan base[5:20:43] In his head[5:20:45] I don't think he imagined[5:20:47] Empty theaters[5:20:49] I don't think he was prepared[5:20:51] And you can see he's not doing well guys[5:20:53] I talked to Bert on the phone[5:20:55] He's not doing well[5:20:57] Bert's not doing so hot right now[5:20:59] I think he needs a little support[5:21:01] I'd like to give him some support[5:21:03] Thank you[5:21:05] Thank you[5:21:07] And[5:21:09] Thank you, yes that was my message[5:21:11] Bert's not doing so well[5:21:13] He needs some support[5:21:15] Let's see some box office predictions[5:21:17] What do we got here[5:21:19] Oh this was his analytics on how much money[5:21:21] He thinks Bert's movie will make[5:21:23] Oh wow and was it higher or lower than that[5:21:25] So what was the outcome here[5:21:27] Let's see what he thought it would make[5:21:29] 12 minutes[5:21:32] I predict the machine will have a total[5:21:34] Box off performance of[5:21:36] 12 million[5:21:38] And how much[5:21:40] Money has it made so far do we know[5:21:42] Jules[5:21:44] I think on its first weekend it made[5:21:46] Like 5 million or something[5:21:48] Really? I'm not sure how many theaters[5:21:50] It's in now if it was like a one[5:21:52] Weekend thing[5:21:54] So I posted on my story did you see this[5:21:56] And this is why you gotta feel bad for Bert[5:21:58] I posted this[5:22:00] On opening night did you guys see this on my Instagram[5:22:02] This picture my liminal[5:22:04] Photo series that you saw on the dock[5:22:06] That I showed you about us on[5:22:08] Mushrooms at the theater[5:22:10] This was our theater and I posted this on[5:22:12] Instagram on my story saying[5:22:14] We know the truth[5:22:16] About opening night[5:22:18] And I tagged Bert Kreischer[5:22:20] And Sebastian[5:22:22] So low and behold[5:22:24] Bert's on his phone checking his[5:22:26] Mentions sees this[5:22:29] Seen Saturday[5:22:31] Bert Kreischer[5:22:33] Look at that I couldn't believe it[5:22:35] I felt so bad[5:22:37] Bert you'll be happy to know that that picture[5:22:39] Is from Sebastian's movie[5:22:41] Yes[5:22:43] So Bert sees this Bert's tagged[5:22:45] We know the truth about opening night[5:22:47] He sees it[5:22:51] That must have destroyed him[5:22:53] So Bert has seen my[5:22:55] Photography and what a nice picture[5:22:57] Didn't we take some nice pictures[5:22:59] Of the liminal movie[5:23:01] Theater night[5:23:03] It was dead empty[5:23:05] I don't know how anybody is even[5:23:07] Affording to keep the theater[5:23:09] How are the people of the theater even being paid[5:23:11] I know there was like nobody there[5:23:13] There's nobody there[5:23:15] Friday night[5:23:17] 8 o'clock we were there the whole night[5:23:19] Till it shut down[5:23:21] It was us and maybe 5 other people in the whole place[5:23:23] Now I did do[5:23:25] Bert suggested I'm watching Bert[5:23:27] Did we get the clip of Bert talking about the[5:23:29] Go to Bert visiting a movie theater[5:23:31] Bert visiting a movie theater[5:23:33] Check this out[5:23:35] I love this stuff I'm obsessed with[5:23:37] This machine stuff[5:23:39] So Bert[5:23:41] You know he was really excited about this movie[5:23:43] He went to all[5:23:45] These movie theaters and surprised[5:23:47] Movie goers on opening night[5:23:49] By him being in the[5:23:51] Theater he wanted to see[5:23:53] Everybody in the theater[5:23:55] And I feel so bad for him because again he goes to the theater[5:23:57] It's pretty much empty too[5:23:59] He wants this to be the best movie so bad[5:24:01] Bert shows up he goes out[5:24:03] He's in Austin at the time I think he was doing Rogan[5:24:05] To promote the movie[5:24:07] Opening night comes[5:24:09] Bert goes to the big movie theater in Austin[5:24:11] Expecting[5:24:13] 250 seats filled[5:24:15] He gets there[5:24:17] There's maybe 7 people[5:24:19] That show up for his movie[5:24:21] And this was his big he's filming himself[5:24:23] Here watch this[5:24:25] This leads to a more important point[5:24:27] Watch this[5:24:35] He's at the theater[5:24:37] He's showing us the candy[5:24:41] Did you see this?[5:24:43] So I'm listening to Bert[5:24:45] Did we get the clip from the food show?[5:24:47] Something's burning?[5:24:49] Was it the episode with Mark Hamill?[5:24:51] Yeah[5:24:53] It's probably going to be too late[5:24:55] But watch this so Bert's showing us[5:24:57] How he does movies and I'm listening to his[5:24:59] Something's burning[5:25:01] Last week[5:25:03] And he's telling Mark Hamill[5:25:05] You know what he does he goes I put the M&M's[5:25:07] In the popcorn[5:25:09] And he also does this watch this[5:25:11] Oh great yeah this is better[5:25:13] He'll explain[5:25:15] Send that over[5:25:17] Because this is[5:25:19] Such a good tip[5:25:21] I'm going to really like[5:25:23] Help Bert promote this idea[5:25:25] That you should all know[5:25:27] This is the best movie going experience[5:25:29] I've ever had[5:25:31] In this country before[5:25:33] So here's something's burning[5:25:35] With Mark Hamill the dad[5:25:37] What time am I going to?[5:25:39] It should be lined up[5:25:41] 4304? Yeah[5:25:43] Okay listen to this[5:25:45] Escape from all of that[5:25:47] Yeah it's like[5:25:49] An idiot[5:25:51] It'll do a body good to go[5:25:53] And experience this with a full[5:25:55] Theater of people having to rock[5:25:57] It's a good time[5:25:59] So Bert's telling him I'm going to go to the theater[5:26:01] And experience it with the full theater[5:26:03] Like every other movie Mark Hamill's been in[5:26:05] It's a sellout show[5:26:07] Everyone at Bert Kreischer's stand up shows[5:26:09] Thousands of people there not an empty seat[5:26:11] So Bert thought[5:26:13] Yeah especially in Austin[5:26:15] I'm going to go to the opening night of my theater[5:26:17] There were 7 people in the theater[5:26:19] And Bert had to meet and greet all 7[5:26:21] But listen to what Bert says here[5:26:23] What's your order at a movie theater[5:26:25] When you sit down to get a movie[5:26:27] What's your order at a movie theater[5:26:29] We gotta have butter popcorn right?[5:26:31] We gotta have butter popcorn right?[5:26:33] What a basic[5:26:35] This guy's nothing[5:26:37] This Star Wars shit got your head all messed up[5:26:39] This Mark Hamill is that his name?[5:26:41] What a loser[5:26:43] He goes what's your go to[5:26:45] When you go to the movie to get food[5:26:47] Buttered popcorn right?[5:26:49] He's asking his stupid[5:26:51] Basic wife couldn't be more basic[5:26:53] V what's your order at a movie theater[5:26:55] We gotta have butter popcorn right?[5:26:57] Yeah[5:26:59] And some kind of chocolate whether it's chocolate[5:27:01] Covered almonds or junior mints[5:27:03] I like a peanut[5:27:05] I like a peanut M&M[5:27:07] Inside the popcorn where it gets warm[5:27:09] That's not bad[5:27:11] And then I like to get 2 hot dogs[5:27:13] I put them in my pockets for the[5:27:15] I hear this and I gasp[5:27:17] Because I don't know[5:27:19] A lot about movie theater hot dogs[5:27:21] It's something I've never purchased[5:27:23] At the movie theater[5:27:25] So he says here listen to this[5:27:27] That's not bad[5:27:29] And then I like to get 2 hot dogs[5:27:31] I put them in my pockets for the middle of the movie[5:27:33] So that'll keep them warm[5:27:35] I get 2 hot dogs and I put them in my pockets[5:27:37] For the middle of the movie that'll keep them warm[5:27:39] I thought that was the most ridiculous lie[5:27:41] I've ever heard[5:27:43] Because I'm imagining 2 unwrapped[5:27:45] Hot dogs that he's[5:27:47] Stuffing in his jean pockets[5:27:49] No, let's hear some more[5:27:51] And then I get a large diet coke[5:27:53] And then if I can, if they're drinking[5:27:55] I get cocktails and bring cocktails in[5:27:57] That's the best[5:27:59] How do the hot dogs hold up after me in your pockets?[5:28:01] You'd be shocked, pretty well[5:28:03] Pretty well, that's why I bring a vest in[5:28:05] 2 hot dogs in each pocket[5:28:07] Perfect[5:28:09] So I got this in my head[5:28:11] I saw this a week before I go to the movie[5:28:13] And I'm like, he gets 2 hot dogs[5:28:15] And he puts them in his pockets[5:28:17] And they hold up well[5:28:19] So I go to the theater[5:28:21] I get the hot dogs[5:28:23] Now[5:28:25] I first see, I get to the hot dogs[5:28:27] They're wrapped in silver paper[5:28:29] And they're sitting under the heat lamps[5:28:31] And I go, oh, I get it[5:28:33] So they're like, hot, he puts them in the vest[5:28:35] Pockets[5:28:37] So I do the same thing[5:28:39] I'm wearing a hoodie, I put them in my hoodie pockets[5:28:41] Guys, I should have got[5:28:43] 3 hot dogs[5:28:45] These were incredible[5:28:47] Have you ever had a Costco dog?[5:28:49] Sam's Club dog? It was like that[5:28:51] It was so good[5:28:53] I could have sat there eating 6 hot dogs[5:28:55] And guess what? I had one an hour later[5:28:57] Just like he said[5:28:59] It was delicious, it was still warm[5:29:03] This, I want to go to the theater[5:29:05] Just to have a couple hot dogs tonight[5:29:07] I'm not kidding, this was so good[5:29:09] And they give you a little relish pack[5:29:11] A mustard pack[5:29:13] I wish that I might bring my own onions[5:29:15] My own pickle[5:29:17] You know, my health problems[5:29:19] By the way, last week, pretty much had to do[5:29:21] With too much bortillos[5:29:23] I've been eating hot dogs[5:29:25] I've been eating so many hot dogs[5:29:29] I'm a hot dog addict[5:29:31] I could probably eat like[5:29:33] 100 hot dogs in one sitting[5:29:35] We should show them how[5:29:37] I could do that[5:29:39] Really, that is the move[5:29:41] He's not lying[5:29:43] I bought the 2 hot dogs in solidarity with[5:29:45] Bert's movie[5:29:47] I've got a picture somewhere[5:29:49] And I put them in my[5:29:51] hoodie pocket[5:29:53] And I ate one of the hot dogs as the movie[5:29:55] was starting, it was delicious[5:29:57] She was[5:29:59] upset that we didn't get more[5:30:01] hot dogs[5:30:03] He got 3 hot dogs and then he just ate them all without[5:30:05] offering me even one[5:30:07] Well, I gave you a bite, I didn't think you were interested[5:30:09] So that is[5:30:11] If you could take anything away from all this[5:30:13] Bert Kreischer[5:30:15] There he is with the 2 hot dogs again[5:30:17] 2 hot dogs[5:30:19] It really works[5:30:23] So here he is[5:30:25] Surprising the fans[5:30:27] But he thought this would be like a mobbed[5:30:29] theater[5:30:35] It's empty, look the place[5:30:37] was empty[5:30:39] So there's not a lot of people here[5:30:43] Holy shit[5:30:45] My friend, she's going through a breakup right now[5:30:47] I said, you know what you gotta do?[5:30:49] You watch Secret Time, you watch Razzle Dazzle[5:30:51] Then you watch The Machine[5:30:53] on YouTube and then you go to the movie[5:30:55] There's no fucking answer[5:30:59] Now what if you were going there to hate[5:31:01] Like if we walked into the theater on mushrooms[5:31:03] and Bert was there[5:31:05] I think that there should be a warning[5:31:07] There's gotta be a warning that the actor[5:31:09] from the movie could be there to say hi[5:31:11] and he's not letting anybody go by[5:31:13] without signing their hat[5:31:15] I'd walk out with 100[5:31:17] Sharpie signatures all over my[5:31:19] clothes[5:31:21] on mushrooms[5:31:23] I mean that would have been wild[5:31:27] And that's what I'm holding out for you[5:31:29] And what if guys started taking their shirts off in the theater[5:31:31] and we had it easy in there[5:31:33] Yeah, we had it easy with the three other guys[5:31:49] Motherfucker[5:31:51] You want two hot dogs?[5:31:53] Here take that with you[5:31:55] Enjoy[5:31:57] See Bert's leaving because there wasn't[5:31:59] That was it, he showed every guy that came[5:32:01] And you can see when they cut to that other camera shot[5:32:03] There's nobody else there[5:32:05] And now he's leaving already[5:32:07] Fuck me[5:32:09] He would have showed him with all the people, they would have done a group shot[5:32:11] He had no group shot[5:32:13] to take[5:32:15] I feel so bad[5:32:17] He went to the theater[5:32:19] opening night and imagine he's going to go home[5:32:21] How did it go? Let's see the pictures[5:32:23] Uh, well I met these guys[5:32:25] Where's the big group shot?[5:32:27] Didn't work out that way[5:32:29] Lynette[5:32:31] Imagine telling Lynette[5:32:33] there were only[5:32:35] about 12 people there[5:32:37] Wasn't a 250 seater you said?[5:32:39] He was talking about how[5:32:41] he goes 750 seats[5:32:43] all there to see me, I can't wait[5:32:45] That never happened[5:32:47] Takes your shirt off, this is it[5:32:49] I'm the fucking machine[5:32:51] Oh[5:32:53] I'm the fucking machine[5:32:55] He was so excited about this experience[5:32:57] Did we have any more?[5:32:59] Did we have Bert on Rogan?[5:33:01] To show some of that?[5:33:03] This stuff's always good[5:33:05] Rogan has been[5:33:07] Oh boy[5:33:09] I think, you know, my prediction[5:33:11] with Joey came true[5:33:13] He's going to run out of stories, right?[5:33:15] And what did I say about Rogan? Does anybody remember[5:33:17] what I said with this comedy club?[5:33:19] You know, it sounds like all good news[5:33:21] so far, right?[5:33:23] Wrong[5:33:25] The one thing Rogan didn't think about is[5:33:27] what if the comedy mothership[5:33:29] is a huge success?[5:33:31] What if this whole Austin thing[5:33:33] is too much[5:33:35] of a success?[5:33:37] You know, Rogan is how old?[5:33:39] 55 years old now?[5:33:41] How old is he?[5:33:43] 55[5:33:45] The guy's got a family[5:33:47] He's podcasting[5:33:49] all week, and now[5:33:51] listen to this, this is the new edition[5:33:53] that he just brought into his life[5:33:55] every night[5:33:57] going to the comedy mothership from open[5:33:59] till three in the morning[5:34:01] and drinking[5:34:03] every night[5:34:05] Uh oh, has anyone noticed[5:34:07] Rogan's starting to get[5:34:09] some YouTuber burnout?[5:34:13] Anyone notice Rogan[5:34:15] getting a little cranky with all the[5:34:17] guests lately? You can see it in his[5:34:19] eyes. He doesn't know[5:34:21] what to do because in his mind he[5:34:23] could do it all, right?[5:34:25] He was already doing it all[5:34:27] He was already stretched too thin[5:34:29] and he's only getting older[5:34:31] Now, you're telling me[5:34:33] You're telling me, you know, I did mushrooms one[5:34:35] stinking night here, I was in bed for six days[5:34:37] You're telling me that[5:34:39] at 58 years old with the whole[5:34:41] family, you've got to do archery during[5:34:43] the day, you've got to do eight podcasts[5:34:45] a week for four hours a session[5:34:47] You've got to exhaust your charm[5:34:49] and charisma during these podcasts[5:34:51] Then, you've got to[5:34:53] do your workout routine, which is[5:34:55] four hours a day, you've got to do[5:34:57] your ice baths, you've got to do[5:34:59] jujitsu, you've got to do commentary[5:35:01] On top of that, you're telling[5:35:03] me that you're going to go to a[5:35:05] comedy club every night[5:35:07] from 8pm[5:35:09] to 4am[5:35:11] drinking and doing mushrooms[5:35:13] and laughing it up with these[5:35:15] comedians? Now, that's a lifestyle[5:35:17] he just got used to[5:35:19] This is a lifestyle that I think is[5:35:21] scaring him shitless[5:35:23] Shitless?[5:35:25] I think he's really[5:35:27] scared that he can't keep this[5:35:29] up, but that everybody wants[5:35:31] to, and the hang is so good[5:35:33] All we've been hearing about is the hanging[5:35:35] mitzis[5:35:37] We have a plan[5:35:39] to[5:35:41] to[5:35:43] What's it called when you burn[5:35:45] down a physical property?[5:35:47] Arson[5:35:49] Let's show[5:35:51] you JRE's behavior[5:35:53] It started with Bert Kreischer this week[5:35:55] But it carries on with a[5:35:57] lot of fine people, people who[5:35:59] definitely didn't deserve[5:36:01] Remember when Joe's eyes[5:36:03] go dark?[5:36:05] When he gets a little[5:36:07] icky with you[5:36:09] he starts getting[5:36:11] What is this? Dismissed?[5:36:13] One month free trial? What is all this crap?[5:36:15] Okay, I'm trying to find the[5:36:17] People in the chat are saying that[5:36:19] Mike ironically liking[5:36:21] The Machine kind of makes me want to see the movie[5:36:23] and I hate Bert[5:36:25] You have to go see the movie[5:36:27] I mean, this is a part of your life[5:36:29] Hey, you know how you said you will be seeing[5:36:31] The Machine again? To get a fair review[5:36:33] Since you saw it on[5:36:35] Mushrooms now, you should see it on[5:36:37] Salvia[5:36:39] Well, I'll tell you[5:36:41] My review, regardless of what I'm on[5:36:43] is going to be in the tanks[5:36:45] I mean, the movie was bad[5:36:47] There's no going around that[5:36:49] But it was[5:36:51] He did his best[5:36:53] And it deserves a[5:36:55] laugh[5:36:57] You don't have to be cruel to him about it[5:36:59] Let's find his JRE[5:37:01] performance[5:37:03] The tour with him[5:37:05] George knows his uncle[5:37:07] You know Joe, he would say the wildest[5:37:09] fucking shit[5:37:11] Let's see what's going on with him[5:37:13] Here he is, Bert[5:37:15] And again, Bert's so excited to see Joe[5:37:17] Listen to this opening[5:37:19] Listen to this[5:37:21] Have another one with me[5:37:23] You've earned it[5:37:25] All day![5:37:27] Ooh, that music[5:37:29] kills me[5:37:31] Listen to this, right here[5:37:33] I love you way more than you'll ever love me[5:37:35] And you know that I told you that last night[5:37:37] That's a ridiculous thing to say to a person[5:37:39] Ooh[5:37:41] I'm starting to learn[5:37:43] And you know, it's like with these[5:37:45] Protector Parks[5:37:47] You know, Ari Shafir[5:37:49] Yeah, he's a friend of Rogan's[5:37:51] But it's more of like a Rogan lackey[5:37:53] You know, I don't see[5:37:55] any real friendship with[5:37:57] Joe and these guys[5:37:59] like Bert[5:38:01] I think he wanted a real friendship[5:38:03] You know, he wanted to be the[5:38:05] father figure of this comedy community[5:38:07] I don't think he gets along with Bert[5:38:09] at all. I don't think Rogan likes[5:38:11] Mark Norman, I don't think he likes[5:38:13] Shane Gillis as much as he pretends[5:38:15] to and wants to[5:38:17] I don't think he gets along with even Tom[5:38:19] Like, he[5:38:21] fantasizes that he gets[5:38:23] along with him. And I think[5:38:25] Bert is[5:38:27] the most receptive[5:38:29] to kind of figuring that[5:38:31] out. You know, I can see it in all[5:38:33] their eyes, they kind of know, like[5:38:35] Shane and Mark know how awkward it is[5:38:37] to be around Joe. This isn't[5:38:39] a real friendship[5:38:41] We have a bunch of clips from that, too[5:38:43] So, let's see that again. Look at this[5:38:45] And Joe opens the show[5:38:47] Cheersing to Bert, right? I love[5:38:49] you, man. And Bert goes[5:38:51] I love you way more than you love[5:38:53] me. And this is[5:38:55] about as real as you could get. Watch this[5:38:57] Joe Rogan[5:38:59] podcast, check it out[5:39:01] The Joe Rogan Experience[5:39:03] Train my day, Joe Rogan podcast[5:39:05] by night. We're gonna get to the bottom of this, huh guys?[5:39:07] Tell Joey[5:39:09] I love you[5:39:11] I love you to death. Brother[5:39:13] I love you way more than you'll ever love me[5:39:15] and you know that I told you that last night[5:39:17] Bert knows. That's a ridiculous[5:39:19] thing to say to a person. You changed my life[5:39:21] immeasurably. You changed mine, too[5:39:23] We changed each other's lives[5:39:25] We really did. See, Joe[5:39:27] has not beaten himself lately[5:39:29] He's turning into Dark Brandon[5:39:31] What could[5:39:33] Joe's dark nickname be?[5:39:35] Night Joe[5:39:37] He's got[5:39:39] Shitty Eye Joe[5:39:41] and Bert knows it and Bert's gonna suffer[5:39:43] through this interview that he wanted to be a blast[5:39:45] Joe doesn't want to[5:39:47] celebrate the machine[5:39:49] Joe doesn't want these guys doing movies[5:39:51] Joe wants them[5:39:53] being like him, hating[5:39:55] agents[5:39:57] hating the industry, right?[5:39:59] But Bert wants to be a star[5:40:01] as he should. Bert could be[5:40:03] the next Adam Sandler[5:40:05] Yup[5:40:07] Bert could be the next[5:40:09] I would love to see more[5:40:11] Bert comedies[5:40:13] Really? They need to have some nudity in them[5:40:15] They really do. They need to have[5:40:17] some topless Russians[5:40:19] No nudity in the machine[5:40:21] Then it didn't need to be rated R[5:40:23] Did you see the idol?[5:40:25] Now if this idol[5:40:27] doesn't continue the amount of[5:40:29] nudity, if they think they're just gonna open[5:40:31] with that, get us hooked, and then no more[5:40:33] nudity, I'll be very[5:40:35] upset. Do you think she was wearing fake[5:40:37] nipple covers? You know, isn't that a shame[5:40:39] she was so disgusting[5:40:41] You know who would have been great in the role of the idol?[5:40:43] Dasha Naprokorg[5:40:47] She's such a sad sack of shit[5:40:49] Her nudity isn't even good because it looks like[5:40:51] you're watching a rape[5:40:53] But they better keep that nudity[5:40:55] up. You know, I'm fighting for[5:40:57] nudity in film[5:40:59] It's really the only way. I was thinking about this the other day[5:41:01] when we were[5:41:03] banning all nudity from film because they all want to[5:41:05] be so respectful to the actresses[5:41:07] But that leaves young[5:41:09] kids only[5:41:11] their only option to jack off now is[5:41:13] the extreme hardcore[5:41:15] porn, incest porn[5:41:17] trans porn[5:41:19] watching the most disgusting girls on the block[5:41:21] get jizzed on in the daylight[5:41:23] with their bruises[5:41:25] all over their body[5:41:27] You know, when I was a kid[5:41:29] most of your jacking[5:41:31] off was done to nude scenes from[5:41:33] Ghoulies 3. And that's nice[5:41:35] And that was nice. The girls were perfectly lit[5:41:37] They were well make-upped[5:41:39] It wasn't disgusting[5:41:41] You didn't have to watch an[5:41:43] open anus[5:41:45] You didn't have to see juices[5:41:47] flying everywhere. And it was nice[5:41:49] and it was more than enough[5:41:51] But now you're sending a 13-year-old[5:41:53] kid. He's got to go to Pornhub.com[5:41:55] The landing page of that place already[5:41:57] is, it's scary[5:41:59] It's like being in a bad neighborhood[5:42:01] And[5:42:03] it's all because Hollywood is too afraid[5:42:05] to ask an actress to get naked anymore[5:42:07] because how dare they, right?[5:42:09] It's rape. Please, please[5:42:11] fight for nudity back[5:42:13] in shows and movies[5:42:15] It's the best nudity[5:42:17] there is. Poor Mr. Skin[5:42:19] You go to Mr. Skin's website, he's got nothing going on[5:42:21] He thought he was going to have a lifetime[5:42:23] career, Mr. Skin[5:42:25] rating the best nudity for movies[5:42:27] selling a membership to see all the nude scenes[5:42:29] in one place. I went there[5:42:31] the other day. He hadn't had an update since[5:42:33] 2016. His site's[5:42:35] the same. It's worse than the Red[5:42:37] Bar site. And you go there[5:42:39] and you start arranging top nudity[5:42:41] from 2023 down. You're clicking[5:42:43] around. There's nothing there[5:42:45] You know, they're still showing like movies like[5:42:47] Sirens on that site. They're showing movies[5:42:49] like[5:42:51] Wild Things[5:42:53] is still the top banner[5:42:55] It's like, guys, shouldn't that[5:42:57] be enough? Alright, let's see how this goes[5:42:59] I just get too[5:43:01] much credit. It's all of us[5:43:03] It's like we did it all together[5:43:05] We all did it together[5:43:07] without good friends[5:43:09] nobody really[5:43:11] You're not friends[5:43:13] Bert knows it[5:43:15] Bert's going to watch this clip[5:43:17] He wants to hear finally someone stick up for his[5:43:19] movie and Bert, really, we're on your[5:43:21] side here[5:43:23] Bert, when you're watching this and you hear me say that[5:43:25] Rogan's not your friend, you know that, right?[5:43:27] You know this relationship[5:43:29] with him feels really off, huh?[5:43:31] Now, how willing[5:43:33] How willing are you[5:43:35] to go through that experience?[5:43:37] You know?[5:43:39] Is it worth the money and the[5:43:41] promotion? Maybe it is[5:43:43] But really think about this, Bert[5:43:45] You know when you sit[5:43:47] down with him, it doesn't feel like sitting down with[5:43:49] no friend[5:43:51] You could be[5:43:53] bigger than Rogan, Bert[5:43:55] But you need to publicly[5:43:57] denounce him[5:43:59] Please, take[5:44:01] Take it from me, Bert, this will work[5:44:03] We could get in his head very easily[5:44:05] Bert's head?[5:44:07] I don't think people realize[5:44:09] they're missing a big opportunity here[5:44:11] of how much we could control Bert to do things[5:44:13] Really[5:44:15] I think he's very, very[5:44:17] easily influenced[5:44:19] Yeah, and he hates[5:44:21] videos about him[5:44:23] They'll spook him for months[5:44:25] Little videos about him, that's why this movie[5:44:27] releasing and all these people picking on him[5:44:29] This is going to cause some[5:44:31] PTSD with him, some trauma[5:44:33] Do you?[5:44:35] It doesn't seem fair[5:44:37] It seems all fucked up[5:44:39] I keep saying to people[5:44:41] You've got to surround yourselves with the motherfuckers[5:44:43] If you're talking about your friends[5:44:47] as if you're the top dog, then you're with the wrong dudes[5:44:49] Okay, that's a good way to[5:44:51] clean this all up here[5:44:53] Alright, let's look at this[5:44:55] There's a lot, but you can just pick your face[5:44:57] Yeah, let's go to 130[5:44:59] Let's see what happens there[5:45:01] Because we're going to watch Joe kind of being[5:45:03] really mean to Bert[5:45:05] My favorite Joe Rogan stuff is when Joe is mean[5:45:07] to the guest[5:45:09] and he's unaware of how crummy[5:45:11] he's acting, right?[5:45:13] It's good for everybody[5:45:15] You want killers, right?[5:45:17] We got into this because we love comedy[5:45:19] and now we're in it[5:45:21] It's so scary and it's so weird[5:45:23] and it's so chaotic[5:45:25] and people are comparing themselves to other people[5:45:27] and it causes all this[5:45:29] totally unnecessary conflict[5:45:31] and[5:45:33] if you just remember why you got it in the first place[5:45:35] you got it in the first place[5:45:37] because you love to watch it[5:45:39] and then you did it and then you got selfish[5:45:41] and you started thinking about yourself[5:45:43] you started thinking about, I want to kill[5:45:45] and I want to be better and I want to be the number one person[5:45:47] Watch them where other people are in their career[5:45:49] I don't have a 30 minute, half hour special[5:45:51] People get upset with people that they really[5:45:53] don't have any conflict with in real life[5:45:55] but in their mind[5:45:57] they associate that person with something negative[5:45:59] because they feel bad when they think about them[5:46:01] Oh, this again, right?[5:46:03] Ah, he's got his shower thoughts[5:46:05] all figured out, huh?[5:46:09] The only reason we pick on Joe[5:46:11] is because we feel so bad about ourselves[5:46:13] Bad old lie[5:46:15] Okay, 12, 20[5:46:17] Yeah, this is probably the best part to play[5:46:19] 12, 20? Okay, let's see this[5:46:21] Yeah, just guide me through here[5:46:23] 12, 20, let's see what happens[5:46:25] Bert's going to be talking about the film[5:46:29] He might be[5:46:31] in Scientology[5:46:33] It might be a thing in Scientology, but[5:46:35] Izzy earns his Monday[5:46:37] After that fight, the way he celebrates life[5:46:39] for like two weeks[5:46:41] he goes out, he's in Miami[5:46:43] he's in New York, he's in Vegas[5:46:45] he's in LA, he's in London[5:46:47] like, he does a tour[5:46:49] I said to him, I go, that's really inspirational[5:46:51] like, the way[5:46:53] that you look at life as it needs to be[5:46:55] and he goes, yeah, you gotta celebrate[5:46:57] you gotta celebrate these moments[5:46:59] I think it's cool as fuck[5:47:01] Wait till you see the fucking bender I'm going on[5:47:03] if my movie does well this weekend[5:47:05] How could you ramp it up any more[5:47:07] than you're already doing it?[5:47:09] Dude, listen, I'll tell you what, I'm going to rehab[5:47:11] I thought he was going on a bender[5:47:13] This is the tour for me at the premiere[5:47:15] and I wake up a week later and they go, your movie did great[5:47:17] Bert, your body's[5:47:19] clean, you've been hydrated, you slept[5:47:21] Just keeps you on a[5:47:23] constant IV[5:47:25] Dude, I need to say this real quick[5:47:27] right now, everyone please[5:47:29] go to movie theaters this weekend and see my movie[5:47:31] They didn't go[5:47:33] Please go out of the house, buy a ticket to a movie theater[5:47:35] that is our biggest challenge is getting people[5:47:37] in movie theaters, so if you love me[5:47:39] or you've ever loved me, you used to love me[5:47:41] If you think I'm annoying as fuck now[5:47:43] Whatever the fuck it is, just give me a shot[5:47:45] Get out of the house and go see[5:47:47] The story started[5:47:49] on this fucking podcast[5:47:51] I would have never told her on stage[5:47:53] Shouldn't Joe's audience be enough[5:47:55] to fill these theaters?[5:47:57] Or get it jump started?[5:47:59] So you're talking about empty theaters across the country[5:48:01] even in Austin empty[5:48:05] So what happened?[5:48:07] So that means only Bert's[5:48:09] closest fans went[5:48:11] and no normal people[5:48:13] went, like really no[5:48:15] normies saw his film[5:48:17] That's pretty[5:48:19] tough[5:48:21] This man right here didn't say you have to tell[5:48:23] it on stage, this is your fucking movie[5:48:25] You need to know him as the machine[5:48:27] From now on, call out[5:48:29] his name at shows, make him tell that story[5:48:31] I leaked the[5:48:33] trailer, this movie was going to sit on the fucking[5:48:35] shelf, Joe you've done so much for me[5:48:37] Do it for Joe guys, do it for Joe[5:48:39] Prove that he's the motherfucker[5:48:41] Well I just think it's a funny[5:48:43] fucking movie[5:48:45] It's going to be fun[5:48:47] It's a big action comedy that needs to be[5:48:49] seen on the big screen[5:48:51] And I think[5:48:53] people will be surprised at how fun this movie is[5:48:55] It's just[5:48:57] fucking fun[5:48:59] I've been fucking up[5:49:01] I was telling you I've been fucking up promotion for it[5:49:03] because I'm way too honest, I'm not an actor[5:49:05] I'm just like, what are the kissing scenes like[5:49:07] and I'm like[5:49:09] rough[5:49:11] You gotta hear this part[5:49:13] Should I tell him my theory about the machine though[5:49:15] and why he's retelling the story[5:49:17] So listen to this, how many times have you heard that[5:49:19] Burt shows up somewhere[5:49:21] to do a set[5:49:23] and he tells you, yeah I show up to do comedy[5:49:25] and everybody's yelling[5:49:27] The machine, the machine, the machine[5:49:29] They want me to tell the story again[5:49:31] Now have you guys heard this Burt[5:49:33] Mr. You know that he does this story[5:49:35] This was his big bit[5:49:37] The machine[5:49:39] And he tells this story[5:49:41] And he's claiming that every show that he does[5:49:43] That's fine[5:49:45] Every show that he does[5:49:47] The dog's doing something weird[5:49:49] We're not the H3 podcast[5:49:51] Doesn't matter if the dog gets electrocuted[5:49:53] during the show, we keep going[5:49:55] I don't want to see anybody's eyes look at the dog[5:49:57] That guy's 19, he's done it all[5:49:59] So Burt's always telling stories[5:50:01] And he just told one recently[5:50:03] when he was doing the comedy Mothership[5:50:05] That they were all going, the machine[5:50:07] And he goes, okay, okay, I'll tell it[5:50:09] I got a theory[5:50:11] After seeing the movie The Machine[5:50:13] You know I'd never heard the story of The Machine[5:50:15] That was just too dreadful[5:50:17] for me to even think about[5:50:19] But I'm watching the movie[5:50:21] And throughout the movie[5:50:23] When he's showing the story of The Machine[5:50:25] Everybody in the movie is going[5:50:27] The Machine[5:50:29] Anytime he walks in the room[5:50:31] That's like his nickname[5:50:33] In the story[5:50:35] So I think what's really happening[5:50:37] Is he's going to comedy clubs[5:50:39] And people are just calling[5:50:41] They're just going, the machine[5:50:43] The machine[5:50:45] And then he thinks they're asking him[5:50:47] To tell the story[5:50:49] He goes, okay, okay, I'll tell it again[5:50:51] And then they're just like, okay[5:50:53] And I guess they're still[5:50:55] Excited about that, but I don't think that's what[5:50:57] They're ever asking[5:50:59] Think about this[5:51:01] There's no other standup comic[5:51:03] Where people are requesting them to tell[5:51:05] A 50 minute story[5:51:07] Over and over again[5:51:09] You want to hear new stuff[5:51:11] So I think for 10 years[5:51:13] Bert has been mistaking people[5:51:15] Just going, yo, machine[5:51:17] And thinking[5:51:19] That that means they all want the story[5:51:21] And then throwing away all these standup sets[5:51:23] To tell the story over and over again[5:51:25] Until he's so sick of it[5:51:27] And now they're so sick of it they won't even go to the movie[5:51:29] Yeah[5:51:31] I think that's what happened[5:51:33] I think this has been a giant misunderstanding[5:51:35] Okay, this part's really good[5:51:37] And this could be a me too that we just caught[5:51:39] Listen to this[5:51:41] This takes a turn here[5:51:43] Bert has a kissing scene[5:51:45] His wife in the movie[5:51:47] Is played by some woman who's supposed to be Lynette[5:51:49] This woman[5:51:51] That's Bert's wife[5:51:53] Talking about how Ari[5:51:55] Drugged Bert with MDMA[5:51:57] She's saying, bloop, now you're under my control[5:51:59] How disgusting is that?[5:52:01] He was hypnotized[5:52:03] We love that[5:52:05] And now you're under my control[5:52:07] So we thought it was weird when we were watching the movie[5:52:09] He like fully makes out[5:52:11] With this fake wife[5:52:13] And we're all sitting there going[5:52:15] But what about Leanne?[5:52:17] Is that her name? Leanne?[5:52:19] He was cheating[5:52:21] He was making out too hard with the fake wife in the movie[5:52:23] And[5:52:25] I just felt like that[5:52:27] Didn't need to be in there[5:52:29] Listen to him talk about the make out scenes[5:52:31] This could be a Hollywood[5:52:33] Ban[5:52:35] Me too moment[5:52:37] Listen to this[5:52:39] Sorry Bert[5:52:41] We have one kissing scene[5:52:49] I didn't know[5:52:51] I didn't know there was kissing scenes in the movie[5:52:53] Because I don't read the action when I read the script[5:52:55] I just read the dialogue[5:52:57] First of all, that's crazy[5:52:59] I didn't know there was a kissing scene in the movie[5:53:01] Until I got to set[5:53:03] Because when I read the script[5:53:05] I only read the dialogue, not the actions[5:53:07] Seems like a Bert lie[5:53:09] Seems like a lie[5:53:11] He didn't know there was a kissing scene in his movie[5:53:13] Until he was on set, okay[5:53:15] So I don't read like, you know, hey[5:53:17] Bert comes back, kisses his wife[5:53:19] And knocks her off her feet[5:53:21] I just go like, oh, Leanne was in Serbia[5:53:23] And they were like, hey, you have a kissing scene[5:53:25] And I was like, what?[5:53:27] And they're like, yeah, your wife[5:53:29] And I was like, shut the fuck up[5:53:31] Oh my god, I'm so sorry, I blew that[5:53:33] What was the time code we were at?[5:53:35] Because I just figured something out[5:53:37] I think he lied to Leanne[5:53:39] Do you hear this?[5:53:41] Because his story doesn't make sense[5:53:43] He's going, I didn't know there was a kissing scene[5:53:45] On set in Serbia[5:53:47] And Leanne goes, wait, there's a kissing scene?[5:53:49] And he goes, yeah, well, oh[5:53:51] It's because I only read the dialogue, not the[5:53:53] You wrote the fucking movie![5:53:57] Wait a minute, you were too afraid[5:53:59] To tell Leanne there was a kissing scene[5:54:01] She's on set[5:54:03] The day of the kissing scene[5:54:05] So now this story makes sense[5:54:07] Why you said, oh, I only read the dialogue[5:54:09] And not the action[5:54:11] Listen to this again[5:54:13] 1440, okay, let me pull it[5:54:19] Okay, let's see where we're at[5:54:21] And I think[5:54:23] People will be surprised at how fun[5:54:25] This movie is[5:54:29] Like, you know, hey[5:54:31] Bert comes back, kisses his wife[5:54:33] I think I just caught him[5:54:35] Leanne was in[5:54:37] Serbia, and they were like, hey, you have a kissing[5:54:39] Scene today, and I was like, what?[5:54:41] Your wife, and I was like, shut the fuck up[5:54:43] I mean, come on[5:54:45] You didn't know you were kissing somebody[5:54:47] Until you were on set day of[5:54:51] You either lied to Leanne[5:54:53] Like I predicted here[5:54:55] Which is probably the real story[5:54:57] Or you're making up some other[5:54:59] Sort of mumbo jumbo[5:55:01] Bert, this is why[5:55:03] People get mad at you[5:55:05] This is why you're denning out[5:55:07] Alright, let's hear this, this gets worse though[5:55:09] I was like, is that cool?[5:55:11] And Leanne's like, yes, you're an actor[5:55:13] I was like, yeah, but I haven't cheated on you[5:55:15] Ever, like I've kissed someone[5:55:17] 20 fucking years[5:55:19] She was like, it's just acting[5:55:21] And I was like, okay[5:55:23] All I'll say is[5:55:25] The pants I was wearing were loose fitting[5:55:27] And I don't wear underwear[5:55:29] Oh Bert[5:55:31] We did one take and I was like, costume change please[5:55:33] They're like, what?[5:55:35] You came in your pants?[5:55:37] In your pants?[5:55:39] Is that what he's saying?[5:55:41] Is he just like trying to tell a kooky story not realizing[5:55:43] This is like one of these[5:55:45] I want to tell a stupid story about the kissing scene[5:55:47] You know[5:55:49] And you're gonna say that you were wearing thin pants[5:55:51] And had no underwear[5:55:53] And after the first kissing scene you go[5:55:55] Uh, costume change please[5:55:57] Uh oh, little accident[5:55:59] Is that what you're trying to say to me here?[5:56:01] What? I was like[5:56:03] I need to change my pants[5:56:05] I guess I'm not an actor, I'm just a regular kid[5:56:07] You can't come[5:56:09] Oh my goodness Bert[5:56:11] Even Joe's like, what?[5:56:13] And I was like, I don't know what the fuck are you supposed to do[5:56:15] Are you supposed to kiss someone and then just[5:56:17] How the fuck does that work?[5:56:21] You ever kiss someone?[5:56:23] Your body doesn't know that it's just acting[5:56:25] No[5:56:27] No[5:56:29] How could it?[5:56:31] I did the first kiss[5:56:33] It's cool as fuck[5:56:35] By the way, I've talked with her and we've talked about this[5:56:37] A number of times[5:56:39] And she goes[5:56:41] We do the first kiss and I'm like, I don't know[5:56:43] I'm just like, you know[5:56:45] And she's like, hey, you know, really go for it[5:56:47] Like really go for it[5:56:49] And I was like, for real?[5:56:51] She's like, yeah, try to like knock me off my feet[5:56:53] Like kiss me[5:56:55] So I was like, okay[5:56:57] I'm thinking about it, I'm gonna fucking[5:56:59] Walk up, and as soon as[5:57:01] What the fuck is happening? This is different[5:57:03] Holy shit, and then I'm like, costume change[5:57:05] Listen to Joe[5:57:07] I need tape, I need tape[5:57:09] Someone get me ice[5:57:11] Is that, are you allowed to talk about that?[5:57:13] Whoa[5:57:15] You're supposed to say like[5:57:17] Joe's like, isn't this like[5:57:19] Aren't they show against stuff like this[5:57:21] In Hollywood right now?[5:57:23] So at the very least he's getting a big[5:57:25] Boner, right, that he needs to tape down[5:57:27] Cause it's poking into her body[5:57:29] Illegal[5:57:31] Imagine being forced[5:57:33] To kiss Burt for pay while he's[5:57:35] Chasing[5:57:37] Okay, what should we do next here with Burt?[5:57:41] You could just do 2550[5:57:43] 2550[5:57:45] Is this where Joe starts getting nasty?[5:57:47] Yeah, this is a good one for Joe getting nasty[5:57:49] 2550, let's see[5:57:51] But I've got so many good ones of Joe being nasty on Protect Your Parks[5:57:53] Great, 2550?[5:57:55] Yeah[5:57:57] Thanks folks[5:57:59] Let's get there here, 2551[5:58:01] Is that close enough? Yeah[5:58:03] An hour, like in Santa Monica[5:58:05] It was really crazy[5:58:07] Now I watched two arguably movie stars[5:58:09] Movie stars, Arnold Schwarzenegger and Edward Norton[5:58:11] Interact in public[5:58:13] Edward Norton's cool as fuck, he's[5:58:15] Dude Fight Club, one of my favorite movies ever[5:58:17] The one where he plays the guy with the two accents[5:58:19] That's fucking, he's an awesome dude[5:58:21] But[5:58:23] When I recognized him and I gave him energy[5:58:25] Like when I recognized him, you just see him[5:58:27] Just be like, uh huh, yeah, okay cool[5:58:29] Like just kind of like, yeah, yeah, yeah[5:58:31] Arnold Schwarzenegger, when he gets[5:58:33] Recognized, he gives you, he matches[5:58:35] Your energy, he gives you[5:58:37] The thing you want[5:58:39] The moment you want, when he comes up[5:58:41] On TV and people go, I met Arnold Schwarzenegger[5:58:43] They go, how was he? Not one person[5:58:45] Maybe I'm sure there's people that say bad things[5:58:47] Everyone I met[5:58:49] When I watched him interact with people[5:58:51] Fucking loved him[5:58:53] He was the coolest dude[5:58:55] He was, you know what he was, Joe? He was like[5:58:57] A movie star[5:58:59] He was like a, like, he brought the like[5:59:01] 1980s[5:59:03] Hey, it's good to see you, hey Bert, come here[5:59:05] Let me tell you, I'm bad at accents, but he's like[5:59:07] Can I just tell you, I think[5:59:09] With some sensitive people[5:59:11] I think your happy[5:59:13] Fun guy energy[5:59:15] Sometimes throws people off[5:59:17] And they're like, ugh, I got to get[5:59:19] Out of here[5:59:21] So they got to get out of here[5:59:23] Bert's energy throws people off[5:59:25] You can see Bert was like[5:59:27] Okay, really?[5:59:29] You know, this gets in Bert's head[5:59:31] So, Joe[5:59:33] Doesn't like Bert, you can tell Joe[5:59:35] Doesn't like this guy[5:59:37] Well maybe Bert's an annoying loudmouth[5:59:39] In person, maybe Bert gets drunk[5:59:41] And he won't shut up and you're like[5:59:43] Please, you know, this is a 58[5:59:45] Year old man, he can't be listening[5:59:47] To these people ramble on booze[5:59:50] Exactly, yeah[5:59:52] You got to fake it better, you can't think your friend[5:59:54] Is too annoying[5:59:56] You don't need to be friends with[5:59:58] Everybody at 58[6:00:00] Cause you're like, oh my god, it's fucking Ed Norton[6:00:02] I went like this still[6:00:04] Ohhhhh[6:00:06] Dude, that guy can't handle that[6:00:08] Poor guy was like, and I tagged him[6:00:10] He's a really nice guy[6:00:12] I had him on the podcast[6:00:14] 39.35, what do we got here?[6:00:16] 39.45[6:00:18] 39.45, coming up[6:00:20] What do we got here?[6:00:22] Just another little thing[6:00:24] Okay, here we go[6:00:26] Apparently we're a big part of it[6:00:28] Independent filmmaking has always been really interesting[6:00:30] Because every now and then[6:00:32] There's a great fucking movie[6:00:34] That you just don't hear about[6:00:36] Yeah[6:00:38] Because someone made it on a shoestring budget[6:00:40] And they pieced it together with their uncle's money[6:00:42] Did you ever see the movie Run Lola Run?[6:00:44] No[6:00:46] Joe, Joe[6:00:48] What's it about Bert?[6:00:50] It's about a fucking[6:00:52] Couldn't stand it anymore, huh?[6:00:54] I mean, we're only 40 minutes in[6:00:56] He goes, have you ever seen the movie Run Lola Run?[6:00:58] Oh, Joe, Joe[6:01:00] And Joe's like, what's it about Bert?[6:01:02] You know, he's sick of this shit[6:01:04] Does he say any more here?[6:01:06] That's the best part[6:01:08] That is the best part, okay[6:01:10] But he's getting here, we should show the one with dice[6:01:12] Yeah, well do that when we come back[6:01:14] We're gonna take a quick shower down[6:01:16] It's getting very hot in here[6:01:18] We'll be right back with more[6:01:20] And we've got some really good, great moments[6:01:22] From Joe Rogan's experience this week[6:01:24] Holy moly[6:01:26] Alright, you got a song for the guys?[6:01:28] We'll be right back[6:01:30] See you soon[6:01:44] I can still feel the love[6:01:49] Feel the love[6:01:53] We not worried about no other niggas[6:01:55] We the mother niggas[6:01:57] You bust down a roller, I bust down a brick[6:02:00] Then I flooded, nigga[6:02:02] I am not too big compared to you rappers[6:02:04] Easy does it, nigga[6:02:06] I am all easy, you trying your best to become me, nigga[6:02:09] She like them bottles with bubbles in it[6:02:11] Buy her Loewe and other linen[6:02:13] Why would I wait when there's other women[6:02:15] Why would I hate when we in love with winning[6:02:18] Buy her bundles, fly her out[6:02:20] Bring a friend, I try her out[6:02:22] Ain't no worries, find her now[6:02:24] The details is ironed out[6:02:26] Easily, they plays along[6:02:28] Hoping that I play a song[6:02:31] Love to fuck the trap music[6:02:33] Don't money just came along[6:02:36] I can still feel the love[6:02:40] I can still feel the love[6:03:05] I can still feel the love[6:03:25] We're the chorus[6:03:27] I can still feel the love[6:03:31] I can still feel the love[6:03:35] I can still feel the love[6:03:40] Feel the love[6:03:44] I can still feel the love[6:03:48] I can still feel the love[6:03:52] I can still feel the love[6:03:57] I can still feel the love[6:04:01] I can still feel the love[6:04:05] La la la, la la la, la la la, la la la, la la la[6:04:32] Publicly subsidized, privately profitable[6:04:34] The anthem of the aperture, puppeteer[6:04:37] Untouchable focus, a moment, not in approval[6:04:40] Bury our heads in the bargains of these neocolonials[6:04:48] I'll form a nemesis, a woman to the Nixon state[6:04:50] Not place a quixote for a new then I will concentrate[6:04:53] Try again, but now I'm confused[6:04:55] What is class war?[6:04:56] Is this class war?[6:04:57] Yes, this is class war[6:05:05] And I'm just a kid[6:05:06] I can't put a fuck on a word for this kind of shit[6:05:10] What a stupid world[6:05:15] And it's beautiful[6:05:17] No regard for principle[6:05:20] What a stupid world[6:05:23] The power of sword, iron, disco[6:05:27] Where is that calling?[6:05:28] Everybody knows, you can tell[6:05:30] About this mouth, I'm the CEO[6:05:32] Environmental restraint[6:05:34] The buzzer goes through the bed[6:05:36] Love will be set[6:05:37] To ensure the benefit[6:05:39] Of unrestricted labor laws[6:05:42] Death can play spikes, it's placed up to death[6:05:44] One, third of us, third of us[6:05:50] Brought to us, come to us[6:05:54] Third of us, third of us[6:05:59] Brought to us, come to us[6:06:05] Can you fucking believe?[6:06:10] What a stupid world[6:06:15] Fuck this bullshit, this blimp-ass will do[6:06:18] To the entities, wrap it up in a flight[6:06:21] She's right for right[6:06:30] Welcome back, I'm Redbar[6:06:34] Thank you for sticking with us[6:06:36] Remember to join that Scars Club, okay?[6:06:40] Redbarradio.net slash Scars Club[6:06:43] I'd like to quadruple the members this month[6:06:48] Help get us there[6:06:50] We could go to more movies[6:06:54] Let's do a couple more of these little Redbar in the wilds that we have this week[6:06:58] Definitely don't want to skip those[6:07:01] Especially because it cost us a lot of money, right?[6:07:04] A hundred dollars a find[6:07:07] People love Redbar in the wild[6:07:08] This is where people discuss us[6:07:11] Could be good, could be bad[6:07:13] What are some of the ones we have here today?[6:07:15] I've got a couple good ones for you in NextUp[6:07:18] Ooh, let's go see[6:07:21] Okay, let's see[6:07:22] Ooh, I like this one[6:07:24] Colm Turrell and Joe List's wife[6:07:32] Oh, I love this one[6:07:33] Joe List's wife, I guess, is a comedian[6:07:36] You guys know Joe List, right?[6:07:38] He was in the Louis C.K. movie[6:07:39] We make fun of him daily[6:07:45] Why is that still playing?[6:07:46] His wife's a comic[6:07:49] And she was on a podcast of a guy I mentioned a lot[6:07:52] Colm Tellum[6:07:53] You know that guy?[6:07:55] You might have seen him on Gas Digital[6:07:57] You'll probably recognize this guy[6:07:59] You might have seen him on studiorentals.com[6:08:02] Ooh, what's that about?[6:08:04] Oh my god, he rents out his[6:08:06] Oh, I felt so bad for this guy[6:08:08] Do you guys know Colm Tellum?[6:08:10] What is his name?[6:08:11] Colm Terrell[6:08:12] He's a guy that has a slight Irish accent or something, right?[6:08:18] Very slight[6:08:20] He hangs out in the Louis Gas Digital[6:08:23] He's so nice[6:08:24] So nice, he started up a podcast a while ago and he went all in[6:08:28] He built his own studio[6:08:30] You know, it was just one of these like Gas Digital rats[6:08:32] that you see here and there on the Real Ash podcast from time to time[6:08:37] But he wanted to go full steam[6:08:38] You don't really see guys like this make such a big jump so quickly[6:08:43] You know, because he got a lot of[6:08:44] He was one of these guys who's on Louis's show all the time[6:08:47] People are like, we love him, we love him, we love him[6:08:49] Because he's fine and he's a very nice guy, right?[6:08:53] You know, he's easy to swallow[6:08:55] So he gets this idea that he's going to open up[6:08:57] He's going to buy his own in New York City[6:09:00] His own full podcast space[6:09:02] Like a commercial space for his podcast and do it[6:09:05] And he did this about 10 months ago[6:09:07] I remember he was messaging me[6:09:09] Going, asking me about mixers, Jules[6:09:12] He was asking me what mixer I recommend[6:09:14] I go, out of your league, pal[6:09:18] No, I'm sure you were very nice to him[6:09:19] I was very nice to him[6:09:20] But he was building a new studio at the same time[6:09:23] Building a new studio, listen to this though[6:09:25] Two weeks ago, we see him running ads[6:09:28] Renting out his studio for money[6:09:32] So it might not be doing so well[6:09:34] If you got to rent it out on the side[6:09:37] And the ad was like full podcast studio setup[6:09:42] Make your own dream come true[6:09:44] Imagine like renting out[6:09:46] Like my podcast studio is like my bedroom[6:09:49] You don't rent it out[6:09:50] Like imagine me renting this out[6:09:51] You know who rents their studio out?[6:09:53] Kumiya![6:09:54] Yeah, that's how they pay the bills there[6:09:56] They rent that space out when they're not using it[6:10:00] To other shitty little shows[6:10:02] That just want the dream of having their own set[6:10:05] I don't like it[6:10:06] I don't like it[6:10:07] You shouldn't be renting out[6:10:08] That's like running an Airbnb[6:10:10] It's out of your own home[6:10:12] I mean that's really, really pathetic[6:10:14] All right, let's see[6:10:15] We were featured on his podcast though[6:10:17] With Joe List's wife[6:10:20] And she's gonna let us into some secrets[6:10:22] That Joe does not want out[6:10:24] Let's see, 4030[6:10:27] Let me line this up for you[6:10:28] 4030[6:10:30] And this is from Friday Night Gang[6:10:33] Friday Night Greg number 75[6:10:35] I don't even know if this is Columns Terrell's podcast[6:10:39] Who's Friday Night Greg Stone?[6:10:42] That's what we're watching[6:10:44] No clue who that is[6:10:45] 4030[6:10:46] This is Greg Stone[6:10:48] I'll zoom it up there[6:10:50] There's Column[6:10:51] So I don't know who this is[6:10:52] I don't know who Greg Stone is[6:10:54] He looks like a guy who would die in the movie 1917[6:10:58] Okay[6:10:59] Yeah, he[6:11:01] Well, Column?[6:11:02] Yeah[6:11:02] Yeah, yeah, yeah[6:11:03] I don't know who Greg Stone is though[6:11:04] No, no, no[6:11:06] Fuck you Stone[6:11:07] So let's see what these guys say[6:11:09] Oh, you fuck[6:11:12] Yeah[6:11:12] This is just your whole thing is just for mean comments[6:11:14] To kill, just want to kill the guys at the mean comments[6:11:16] Someone threatened to kill me yesterday[6:11:18] Did they really?[6:11:19] Yeah, you want to hear it?[6:11:20] Yeah[6:11:21] I got a death threat[6:11:22] I probably shouldn't read it just because like fuck these people[6:11:24] But fuck it, whatever[6:11:26] This guy messaged me, he said[6:11:28] It starts off so good[6:11:29] Dude, I just heard you on WKYD[6:11:31] And you are a terrible comedian[6:11:33] Oh my god[6:11:33] You sound full of shit[6:11:34] Red bar will be informed of you[6:11:36] Watch your back[6:11:40] I died[6:11:42] Thank you[6:11:43] See, that's what you got to all be doing[6:11:45] If you guys all do this, we'll be so rich[6:11:49] And why would you read that?[6:11:50] Listen to this again[6:11:51] And I've never met this guy[6:11:53] I've never heard of him[6:11:54] Greg Stone[6:11:55] He said he got a hate, a death threat the other day[6:11:58] Says he gets a death threat[6:11:59] Listen to this[6:12:01] It starts off so good[6:12:02] Dude, I just heard you on WKYD[6:12:04] And you are a terrible comedian[6:12:06] Oh my god[6:12:06] You sound full of shit[6:12:07] Red bar will be informed of you[6:12:09] Watch your back[6:12:11] Watch your back[6:12:12] And Collin knows red bar very well[6:12:15] So he's laughing it up, right?[6:12:17] So listen to this[6:12:18] Oh shit[6:12:19] Red bar will be informed of you[6:12:20] Watch your back[6:12:21] Watch your back[6:12:22] What's red bar?[6:12:23] Oh[6:12:23] Red bar is Mike[6:12:24] I[6:12:25] You don't know[6:12:25] Someone I'm very close to got[6:12:27] Red bard[6:12:28] Red bard[6:12:29] Oh, that's Joelist's wife[6:12:33] She goes[6:12:33] Oh, oh[6:12:34] Someone I'm very close to[6:12:36] Joelist got red bard[6:12:39] I know this is going back in time[6:12:40] But why is that a death threat?[6:12:44] Let's hear that again[6:12:45] The red bar is watching[6:12:46] Didn't he say he got a death threat?[6:12:47] Yeah, he calls it a death threat[6:12:48] Wanna hear it? Wanna hear it?[6:12:49] Yeah[6:12:49] I got a death threat[6:12:51] I probably shouldn't read it just because[6:12:52] I got a death threat[6:12:53] Yeah[6:12:53] But fuck it, whatever[6:12:55] This guy messaged me[6:12:56] He said it starts off so good[6:12:58] Dude, I just heard you on WKYD[6:13:00] And you are a terrible comedian[6:13:01] Oh my god[6:13:02] You sound full of shit[6:13:03] Okay[6:13:03] Red bar will be informed of you[6:13:05] Watch your back[6:13:06] There's no death threat there[6:13:08] You liar[6:13:09] You're sued[6:13:10] Tell him I'm suing him[6:13:11] Tell him[6:13:12] Oh dude, his dad is a Jewish lawyer[6:13:14] He's Jewish[6:13:16] They got the lawyers on this[6:13:17] You could not[6:13:18] I want a retraction[6:13:21] I mean, you can't say that's a death threat[6:13:22] You cannot say that[6:13:23] So now Joelist's wife thinks we're death threaters[6:13:27] That's not a death threat[6:13:28] She heard the truth[6:13:29] You bitch[6:13:31] Okay, let's see how this goes[6:13:33] Idion, you sound full of shit[6:13:35] Red bar will be informed of you[6:13:37] Watch your back[6:13:38] Oh, I guess watch your back[6:13:39] But that's not a death threat[6:13:40] No, that's our slogan[6:13:43] Watch your back[6:13:45] There's nothing wrong with saying that[6:13:47] Keep an eye over your shoulder[6:13:49] We're coming[6:13:49] I feel like it doesn't count as a death threat[6:13:51] Unless the person is like[6:13:54] I'm being serious[6:13:55] Trust me[6:13:56] I'm gonna kill you[6:13:57] And there's no way that you can get out of this[6:13:59] Nobody said[6:13:59] They said red bar's been informed of you[6:14:01] Watch your back[6:14:02] It means, you know, watch your behavior's back[6:14:05] Okay, let's see how this plays out[6:14:07] Because it's pretty good[6:14:08] You sound full of shit[6:14:10] Red bar will be informed of you[6:14:12] Watch your back[6:14:14] Red bar[6:14:15] Red bar is Mike[6:14:17] Someone I'm very close to got[6:14:19] Red bar?[6:14:19] Red bar[6:14:20] What's red bar?[6:14:21] No, no[6:14:22] Red bar is the man[6:14:23] We don't want any trouble, red bar[6:14:26] Oh, I'm living it up[6:14:28] All the niggas that supported me[6:14:29] And now I'm fucking living it up[6:14:31] Living it up[6:14:32] I tell you, this is the best my life's ever been[6:14:34] I feel like Taylor Swift on V[6:14:37] Strumming a giant fucking guitar[6:14:42] This is everything I always wanted this show to be[6:14:44] So she goes[6:14:45] It was awful though[6:14:46] Did you hear that?[6:14:47] And he's doing[6:14:48] This is what I want people to be doing[6:14:49] No, no, no, no[6:14:51] Well, that's red bar[6:14:52] No, no[6:14:53] No, red bar's the man[6:14:54] We don't know[6:14:55] We don't want any trouble, red bar[6:14:57] Red bar likes me[6:14:59] I don't know who red bar is[6:15:00] He's like kind of a piece of shit[6:15:03] He's kind of a piece of shit[6:15:05] Joe, have you been whined?[6:15:10] You fucking bitch ass pussy[6:15:14] You're fucking dead now that we found this out[6:15:18] Joe List[6:15:19] So Joe List[6:15:20] And all we do is make fun of how terrible Joe List's comedy is[6:15:23] We've never really done anything that bad[6:15:25] No[6:15:26] So he's telling his wife[6:15:28] The only List stuff we've ever done is the airplane thing[6:15:32] And then making fun of his stupid movies[6:15:35] Yeah, it's nothing[6:15:36] It's the lightest[6:15:37] I mean, we've made fun of him even worse[6:15:39] And he loves us[6:15:40] He has an army[6:15:42] He's like kind of a piece of shit[6:15:47] He comments a lot on comedians[6:15:49] And then he'll really go mean[6:15:50] Never has a nice thing to say really[6:15:52] No[6:15:53] Very good comedian[6:15:54] You're the best[6:15:56] Wait, what?[6:15:57] She says we never have nothing nice to say about nothing[6:16:00] But we just did a two-hour segment about how amazing[6:16:03] It was very nice[6:16:04] It was very nice[6:16:05] You're wrong[6:16:06] We have nothing nice to say about Joe List[6:16:09] The biggest wiener we've ever seen[6:16:11] And shame on you, you're married to that guy?[6:16:14] And[6:16:14] Do you like kissing his big teeth?[6:16:17] Do you like kissing?[6:16:18] You like kissing that guy when you lay with List?[6:16:21] Is this where you wanted your life to be when you look at List[6:16:24] And that hair and that outfit that he's wearing in that shitty apartment?[6:16:27] Look what your life's become, hoe[6:16:30] They're having a kid, do you know this?[6:16:32] Yeah, that's even worse[6:16:34] It's going to be a terrible marriage[6:16:35] A terrible shitty ugly kid[6:16:38] Your kid can't come out good with a Joe List dad[6:16:41] You've ruined your life[6:16:43] And now we're coming for you[6:16:45] Columns, kid?[6:16:46] Gorgeous[6:16:46] Gorgeous[6:16:47] All right, let's hear the rest[6:16:49] He comments a lot on comedians[6:16:51] And then he'll really go mean[6:16:52] Never has a nice thing to say really[6:16:54] No[6:16:54] No[6:16:55] Oh, very good comedian[6:16:56] You're the best[6:16:57] So I hope I like me[6:16:58] Yeah, he would like you[6:17:00] Red bar has been important[6:17:01] He's going to ragdoll you, dude[6:17:02] You're getting ragdolled[6:17:03] What does that mean?[6:17:04] Tell me about it[6:17:04] He has an army of losers[6:17:07] What the fuck?[6:17:09] Look, she's looking right at us[6:17:11] Guys[6:17:12] She's looking at the army[6:17:14] Why are we losers?[6:17:16] Because Joe List?[6:17:17] She's talking about you guys[6:17:19] He has an army of losers[6:17:24] You're dead[6:17:26] It's just a joke[6:17:27] It's just a joke[6:17:28] It's just a joke to scare you[6:17:30] You've never been put through[6:17:31] So we got to put you through some stuff now[6:17:33] You old bitch[6:17:35] You want to be put through some stuff?[6:17:36] Gone the army, lose it?[6:17:39] You started it[6:17:40] I mean, these guys couldn't be farther from losers[6:17:45] They're rich[6:17:46] They're rich[6:17:46] Very rich[6:17:47] We all have more money than your husband[6:17:49] You do?[6:17:49] You're getting ragdolled[6:17:50] What does that mean?[6:17:51] Tell me about it[6:17:51] He has an army of losers[6:17:56] What are you doing?[6:17:58] Greg just said all of red bars[6:17:59] And Greg, this is all on you, Greg[6:18:02] You let this happen, Greg[6:18:04] So I didn't even know you up until now[6:18:07] And you're letting this woman say this?[6:18:08] That's a lawsuit[6:18:09] I hope you have the money for a whole long[6:18:12] three-year court battle, Greg[6:18:14] Because that's not what you're involved in[6:18:16] If you're airing this[6:18:19] This Greg don't know[6:18:20] He'll get so scared[6:18:21] If something happens to her baby from the stress[6:18:24] It's all on you, Greg[6:18:25] Everything is pinned on Greg[6:18:28] Make him know that[6:18:30] I love red bars[6:18:31] Greg said come and get it[6:18:32] Oh my god[6:18:33] I love the idea of kicking the anpile[6:18:36] I can't go down for this[6:18:38] Red bar doesn't have the balls[6:18:39] You have a baby coming[6:18:41] We can't get red bars[6:18:42] I need the algorithm[6:18:43] You're fucked[6:18:44] You need the algorithm[6:18:45] I need it[6:18:46] Dead man walking[6:18:47] No[6:18:47] Dead man walking[6:18:50] She's so worried[6:18:52] The bay hive[6:18:53] Bay?[6:18:53] They're like the bay hive[6:18:55] Thank you[6:18:57] That's so nice[6:18:59] Beyonce's fans[6:19:00] They're more like barbs[6:19:04] So Joe's been complaining to his wife[6:19:06] This is like when we found out Joe Mattorese[6:19:08] had been whining to his wife about red bar[6:19:10] There's nothing faggier that you could do[6:19:14] than to complain to your wife about red bar[6:19:17] Jesus Christ[6:19:18] And we haven't heard a peep from Joe[6:19:20] So you're sitting there in bed whining about red bar[6:19:22] You can't say a peep to me[6:19:24] That's where you went wrong[6:19:26] You need to address this Joe[6:19:29] This needs to be solved by next Monday[6:19:32] Or the lawyers[6:19:34] The cops[6:19:37] They're like the the bay hive[6:19:39] The Beyonce's[6:19:41] The bay hive[6:19:42] Who's bigger the red bars or the legion of skank[6:19:45] and the skankites[6:19:46] I think at least not[6:19:47] Because I'm a skank people[6:19:48] Yeah[6:19:49] I like skank nights[6:19:50] Maybe the skank[6:19:51] You have they think the skanks fans[6:19:54] are like the scariest guys out there[6:19:55] You have not met Woodward[6:19:58] You have not met Woodward[6:20:00] Woodward[6:20:01] I'd like some messages sent to these people on my behalf[6:20:05] She's scared[6:20:07] She's worried about this[6:20:08] As she should be[6:20:09] I think at least not[6:20:10] Because I'm a skank people[6:20:11] Yeah[6:20:12] I like skank nights[6:20:13] Maybe this means nothing over here[6:20:15] The skankanellis[6:20:16] Skinkanellis[6:20:17] The skankivers[6:20:17] I'll have skankonians[6:20:19] That's the Italian subgroup[6:20:21] I think the gregulators could defend against[6:20:23] The gregulators aren't high[6:20:25] We aren't high in numbers[6:20:26] Yeah[6:20:26] But they're very passionate[6:20:27] Yes[6:20:28] Not but I was but he has he informed the red bar of me[6:20:31] He informed the phone[6:20:32] Uh oh[6:20:33] Like that[6:20:33] It's not good[6:20:34] You got two days[6:20:35] I liked you[6:20:35] I liked I liked you man[6:20:36] Oh[6:20:38] I can't be associated[6:20:39] Yes thank you[6:20:41] Is he uh do you know who he is honestly[6:20:43] or do you just kind of like[6:20:43] I think he's from Chicago[6:20:45] He's a comedian[6:20:46] He's just a podcaster[6:20:47] I haven't heard this part[6:20:48] We stopped we were so celebrating[6:20:50] We didn't even get to this part[6:20:52] I thought that was it and I was like I want it all[6:20:56] This is great he's from Chicago[6:20:57] What else[6:20:58] Look how nervous you are[6:21:03] You're on my radar now[6:21:05] Or do you just kind of like[6:21:06] I think he's from Chicago[6:21:07] He's a comedian[6:21:08] He's just a podcaster[6:21:10] I think he used to run a club out there[6:21:11] But he's a yeah he's a podcaster[6:21:13] A broadcaster I guess you know[6:21:14] And he just does like[6:21:15] He's big though[6:21:16] He's big enough[6:21:18] Annoyance[6:21:19] And his fans[6:21:20] They're kind of things that will tank your like[6:21:23] I don't think a lot of social media platforms[6:21:25] Got rid of the down[6:21:27] Thing because of stuff like that[6:21:28] So mean[6:21:29] So he does[6:21:31] He'll probably he sometimes he'll watch like a video of you[6:21:34] And then they'll spend an hour[6:21:35] Ripping into it[6:21:36] Really[6:21:37] Yeah he's like look at those fucking eyebrows[6:21:38] And then they'll spend 10 minutes criticizing your eyebrows[6:21:41] He's pretty good at it[6:21:42] The problem is is he's a really good broadcaster[6:21:44] It's just very mean what he does[6:21:46] I also want to say this[6:21:47] This guy doesn't know that guy[6:21:48] This is just some fan who's like I'm gonna tell him[6:21:50] Yeah[6:21:50] I'm sure that guy would be like[6:21:51] No no no[6:21:53] We've been told[6:21:54] Very medium[6:21:54] That's what's nice[6:21:55] No[6:21:55] It is really funny[6:21:56] No keep dreaming[6:21:59] Keep dreaming[6:22:04] That better not have ruined my ending performance with that scream[6:22:08] Oh you are so fucked brother[6:22:13] I need my Freddy glove scraping against your pipes[6:22:18] You hear that against your siding today[6:22:21] I'm gonna take that Freddy glove to this guy's house[6:22:22] Does anyone have his home address that I could give away[6:22:28] You can instill that kind of heated hatred in someone[6:22:32] Oh yeah[6:22:33] For just being you[6:22:34] Yeah[6:22:35] It's like so funny to me[6:22:37] Yeah[6:22:38] Like I just make your skin crawl[6:22:40] No no no she's a complete bitch[6:22:45] There's no such thing as nice and you've made a kid with Joe List[6:22:49] Sorry[6:22:50] That's too far[6:22:52] Let's hear the rest[6:22:54] So funny to me[6:22:55] Yeah[6:22:55] Like I just make your skin crawl[6:22:57] And I have nothing to do with you[6:22:59] Yeah[6:22:59] I get that with skanks a lot because I do it so often[6:23:02] And some people hate me[6:23:04] Really?[6:23:04] And I do it a lot that they're like[6:23:07] When the lineups announced they're like oh for fuck's sake[6:23:10] Why is he back and I go I'm coming back every week[6:23:12] Okay back to red bertha[6:23:13] Okay back to red bertha[6:23:14] Get used to it[6:23:15] Hey red bar[6:23:15] I'm standing all over Big J's jokes[6:23:17] I don't give a fuck[6:23:18] Yeah[6:23:19] I'm gonna be drunk and ruin this podcast every week[6:23:22] I don't care about your favorite thing at all[6:23:26] Make no mistake about it[6:23:28] They say they hate you but that's a sign that they love you[6:23:30] No no no oh where's my gun[6:23:34] Stone[6:23:34] Where's my firearm oh oh oh oh[6:23:39] This cannot stand[6:23:44] And I just saw John Wick's[6:23:48] Let's see if he makes it[6:23:49] Okay that can't be mentally the correct response[6:23:53] No but I think because they want to be heard and they know that's how to get heard[6:23:56] That's how I felt about this one show on HBO is Aaron Sorkin's[6:23:59] Okay I think that's enough of them[6:24:00] Red bar in the wild Joe List's wife Callum Tullum[6:24:04] Greg Stone[6:24:05] Greg Stone[6:24:06] Tell him Mike Shaw what you said[6:24:08] The studio has a printer so don't speak to me[6:24:11] Please[6:24:13] Tell him Mike Shaw what you said about him[6:24:15] And it's on[6:24:16] It's bad it's bad[6:24:18] Okay don't show him this clip just tell him like some scary stories okay[6:24:22] I think we got another one here let's see what we got[6:24:24] We've got a bunch[6:24:25] Tom Papa I did not see this[6:24:28] This is a text form light obeyment[6:24:31] Tom Papa on red bar in the wild we all know Tom Papa right the bread maker[6:24:37] Let's see what this is I don't know[6:24:40] Oh okay okay yeah it's a very small one so somebody[6:24:49] commented on Tom Papa's page and they said[6:24:56] Is this about your Kill Tony appearance where they made fun of you?[6:25:00] Forget about it Tom Kill Tony leaves a lot of people feeling down[6:25:04] Mostly the viewers remember red bars watching[6:25:08] And of course Tom Papa liked the comment[6:25:13] And Tom Papa fan account perhaps[6:25:15] And Tom Papa fan account okay so look at that Tom Papa's reading this[6:25:20] He don't know what's up from down[6:25:23] He doesn't need to be scared Tom Papa's been through enough[6:25:28] Okay let's see[6:25:28] Can we watch this tiny melting clip because I wanted to ask the chat a bunch of questions[6:25:33] Yeah so this was brought to our attention and we got to set the record straight[6:25:38] here the last time we brought up Melton I believe my stance on Melton was[6:25:44] Melton rules[6:25:47] So let's see this clip posted to the Facebook we think Melton's getting some bad intel[6:25:53] I just am so confused about this I have to know[6:25:55] Okay so let's listen to this and hopefully we'll be able to clear the air[6:26:00] This is from Melton's Insights[6:26:04] A clip channel dedicated to just Melton's best moments[6:26:08] Let's hear this[6:26:09] Anyone wants to say if you[6:26:12] He wouldn't dare[6:26:13] He's already got the W[6:26:15] Mike David for what anyone wants to say[6:26:18] If you ask them about Mike David and NLO[6:26:20] Red bar and NLO they'll go[6:26:23] Red bar destroyed NLO[6:26:25] Red bar beat Melton to a bloody pulp[6:26:26] Why would he come back and even try to put a[6:26:30] So somebody's getting his head they're trying to scare him they're going red bars coming[6:26:34] Red bars coming[6:26:35] But listen to this it gets a little more convoluted[6:26:38] Tap on that[6:26:41] Boxer doesn't come back once he's sick and try to fight the same guy again[6:26:44] He won he beat Melton[6:26:48] All he could do by circling back and picking another fight with Melton[6:26:52] Is maybe lessen his legacy of destroying Melton[6:26:57] For what Chad?[6:27:00] Chad has no alliances[6:27:01] Listen to this for what Chad[6:27:03] So this is all I've heard of this clip[6:27:05] But it sounds like somebody's got[6:27:08] Got it in Melton's head that I'm teaming up with Chad Zuma[6:27:13] To come after Melton[6:27:15] Couldn't be farther from the honest to god's truth[6:27:18] No you have nothing to worry about[6:27:20] You've got nothing[6:27:22] Melton what you did to Steeltoe[6:27:24] I am forever indebted[6:27:26] Remember Steeltoe is the show I hate the most[6:27:29] You took care of me you swept the floor you showed the world[6:27:32] There's no steel[6:27:33] Melton me and you are you know I owe you my life[6:27:40] So please yeah don't get caught up in thinking that don't listen to those people[6:27:45] We adore you[6:27:47] And this is just come back you don't tell Melton that[6:27:50] Nobody better be speaking for me with Melton[6:27:54] Okay[6:27:54] I just think it's so funny that this group of like a thousand or so guys are so in this like[6:28:00] MLC Chad's universe and I think that those guys kind of think that everybody's doing this[6:28:07] Yeah again they get people get confused on their algorithms thinking kind of that that's what all[6:28:13] of YouTube is seeing so much so that Melton got so confused thinking we're teaming up with Chad[6:28:19] against him to point of yelling you know we never bring up Chad Zuma on the show and there's a[6:28:25] reason for that he falls below the line of import that's a low line that's lower than Denny lower[6:28:34] than Melton he is so uninteresting to us that we we just couldn't care[6:28:43] Someone says Chad Zuma has been threatening to live watch Red Bar's Melton coverage[6:28:48] Maybe that's where it comes from[6:28:49] Well Chad you better keep my name out your mouth[6:28:53] We will strike you[6:28:54] Or yes we'll just strike we'll do it all dirty we'll get all the fans to just take away your[6:28:59] living you hear that there will be no back and forth you're not getting any airtime on this Red[6:29:04] Bar you're too low but we will take away your livelihood behind the scenes with our guys and[6:29:11] we'll get you in trouble with the cops we'll get you no money that's what these guys run on the[6:29:16] little money they make so that's and I mean that's all there will be today[6:29:20] Dollars out of my personal savings have gone into Chad Zumock's chat I'm paying all of his[6:29:26] bills at this point and to scare Melton like that you know after all that he's been through[6:29:33] How dare you anything to melt in chat or the super chats are going away[6:29:37] Yeah okay we got another one here this one is so good this one is so good and it it's so good[6:29:46] because um well I know one of the guys well I know him from the internet he reached out to me[6:29:53] last year this person um well the show we're about to watch is Office Hours with Tim Heidecker[6:30:01] you know Tim Tim and Eric and from all the movies Tim Heidecker he's got a great show Office Hours[6:30:09] and we're going to see Tim look a little nervous here[6:30:14] talking about Red Bar uh-oh uh well it turns out you know and I know that[6:30:20] Vic Berger his friend you guys know Vic Berger you might know Vic Berger from Twitter[6:30:27] Vic Berger reached out to me a year ago or so saying he's he loves the show he loves what[6:30:33] we're doing and it warmed my heart you know it's always been one of those things where I go we got[6:30:40] guys like Owen Benjamin who admire and watch this show for guidance and then we've got guys[6:30:48] like Vic Berger all the way on the opposite of that spectrum watching that warms my heart[6:30:53] um and uh I guess somebody accused Office Hours of stealing Red Bar content because Office Hours[6:31:04] has been doing a lot of Bill Maher coverage let's see what this is about so it was brought up[6:31:11] and um this is another great one here okay you gotta stop messaging me Danny the girl[6:31:18] okay let me get let me get this up for you guys I'm gonna do Red Bar Red Bar now[6:31:23] who are these guys you know that guy he's the best I started in Chicago[6:31:28] oh my god this is even better guess who's in his studio talking about Red Bar Beth Legs Stelling[6:31:39] Beth Stelling is the comedian that was beat up by Cale Hartman who Gavin McInnis took in[6:31:49] after Cale was excommunicated from the comedy scene for his domestic abuse on Beth's[6:31:54] legs that was our last straw remember Beth Stelling posted a picture of her legs all bruised[6:32:01] up claiming Cale Hartman beat up her legs he did uh yes of course he did I mean uh he did[6:32:10] and what's so great about Beth Stelling being here on this big day of Red Bar with Tim Heidecker[6:32:15] and Beth Stelling is that Beth is also the girl from my famous[6:32:22] Banana Bit yep back in Chicago I had uh we had all the comics on and Beth Stelling was one of the[6:32:30] top comedians in Chicago at that time she's moved on and now be some kind of she's not really in the[6:32:37] same scenes as we look into on this show but Beth was sitting in the studio and back then I[6:32:46] was just being myself and I was telling this beautiful joke about meeting a black girl I'll[6:32:51] tell the joke really quick Beth's sitting right here okay I go yeah Beth I was uh at a bar this[6:32:58] week and uh this black chick comes up to me and she's like flirting with me and I'm like I can't[6:33:04] believe it a black chick flirting with me this never happens and she's like this basic black[6:33:10] chick like she looks like your average black chick like she's not a whitened up black chick[6:33:15] she's not like a hot black chick just a so I couldn't believe she came up to me flirting[6:33:20] me so I thought that was so cute she flirts with me and I go off I run off doing something[6:33:28] and then I don't see this girl uh around anywhere so I'm looking around for her to show my friend[6:33:33] this black chick who started talking I'm looking all over the bar finally I see her she's sitting[6:33:40] in the corner eating a banana and and then I go what do you think Beth good joke good story joke[6:33:50] and she goes I think I'm gonna leave and literally started getting teary-eyed and left the show over[6:33:59] racism so here she is years later that's the last I saw Beth she left my studio in tears[6:34:08] over that story and because I started fighting with her about it after I go[6:34:11] wait that's too much for you are you crazy and now here she is talking to Tim Heidecker[6:34:17] about red bar with some guy on the phone let's see what happens I'm gonna do red bar red bar[6:34:23] now who are these guys you know that guy he's the best I started in Chicago oh yeah you know[6:34:29] you know I am digitally known all over the fucking place now I've done nothing it's so stupid how[6:34:37] easy this is they all know every podcast oh yes and none of them are mad at me really it's really[6:34:47] a dream okay let's see I'm gonna do red bar red bar now who are these guys where are you[6:34:53] know that guy he's the best I started in Chicago oh yeah you know you know I'm that good um but[6:34:59] I feel like I definitely maybe cross paths with the come town guys at a festival but I don't know[6:35:03] them I'm gonna do red bar red bar now who are these guys where are you know that guy he's the[6:35:09] best I started in Chicago I heard this oh yeah yeah it's just short oh that was just that clip[6:35:14] there's another clip there's more of course that was just that clip repeating where's the next one[6:35:20] no it's in uh oh no it's still here I'll drag it to the office hours one oh okay office hours one[6:35:28] okay here we go that was the wrong clip okay here it is red bar in the wild Tim Heidecker and Vic[6:35:35] you gotta stop with this message sir often and then I'm like okay here it is they're on the[6:35:42] phone with this guy I don't know who this guy is I think maybe he's a listener he's a listener okay[6:35:46] let's see and then I'm like you won't name name names you won't name I don't know there's endless[6:35:53] supply there's I don't know I don't know if you've heard of um red bar yeah yeah oh you know I want[6:35:58] to address that too because people are like some jerk goes uh that because we're showing that club[6:36:04] random uh Richard Dreyfuss shit they go you're stealing you're stealing from red bar because[6:36:11] he also talked about it I'm like again I'm not platforming and I'm not stealing all we're like[6:36:18] I don't know I can't monitor what everybody else is talking about and also like how am I gonna[6:36:24] again how am I gonna just ignore that Richard Dreyfuss stuff also further I don't think Tim[6:36:28] has ever watched any red bar no I've seen clips and I send stuff all the time you're what I send[6:36:33] you stuff all the time Vic Vic Vic I don't think so some guy tries to stick up for Tim in the studio[6:36:39] because I don't think Tim even watches red bar and he goes I've seen some clips and then Vic[6:36:43] Berger chums in I send you stuff all the time oh let's see that play out again I don't know if[6:36:51] you've heard of um red bar yeah yeah oh you know I want to address that too because people are like[6:36:57] some jerk goes uh that because we're showing that club random uh Richard Dreyfuss shit they go[6:37:04] you're stealing you're stealing from red bar because he also talked about it I'm like again[6:37:11] I'm not platforming and I'm not stealing all we're like I don't know I can't monitor what everybody[6:37:16] else is talking nervous and also like how am I gonna again how am I gonna just ignore that[6:37:21] Richard Dreyfuss stuff also further I don't think Tim has ever watched any red bar no I've seen[6:37:26] clips and I send stuff all the time you what I send you stuff all the time you send me stuff all[6:37:31] the time of red bar yeah what stuff I have in the past when when red bar talked about us oh that[6:37:37] got passed around yeah that got past no I know who he is yeah I don't have any ill will towards[6:37:42] him it seems like a funny show like I think he's funny are you listening to him and then you let[6:37:48] me ask no no I know what to do you're like feeling I saw the comments like you did about that like[6:37:52] oh shit like he red bar is talking about Richard Dreyfuss that would be good for our show let me[6:37:57] she'll be coming I think we talked about it the same week in fact sure because it's just[6:38:03] listener shell pleased but you don't think I don't know you don't think we're watching[6:38:07] club random on her own we have to listen to red bar to find out about it yeah that was[6:38:11] that episode was so prolific like I think it was going to be covered by people either way[6:38:16] but this red bar he does something like six hours a day yeah yeah yeah yeah there's like breaks in[6:38:23] between the musical breaks it's really good uh good David you weren't the guy who you weren't[6:38:28] one of the commenters were you asking about red bar on social media this nervous guy those guys[6:38:35] were you no no no no all right well all the best say tell tell something in French Canadian huh[6:38:43] uh merci beautiful okay I mean I'm blown away and you guys don't have to worry[6:38:52] tim relax you can cover don't be nervous we know you're not stealing from red bar okay nobody's[6:39:01] worried about them isn't Vic just a little cutie that was great that was great and I love how it[6:39:06] always comes back to red bar is really good but he does excel yes it's also great the guy who[6:39:11] is on there is in the chat right now oh thank you so much he's like hey that's me you did great you[6:39:17] did great and I could see in his eyes he's knowing this is making red bar wild that was just amazing[6:39:23] I mean tim is uh an inspiration to me so that meant everything to me uh did we have another[6:39:31] wild or did that okay let's take a break and we'll come right back beautiful red bar in the wild[6:39:38] today thank you uh get out there get red bar in the wild you get a hundred bucks we'll see you[6:39:44] like roaches with a light come on[6:40:02] you had a blog we have barrettas a couldn't buy no birds we fly together a that was every single[6:40:09] wrap up in the dope man really trying to kill cuddle if it double both hands is you pushing[6:40:15] for real talking rock exams i done slid enough to see a clock jam couldn't take the heat so you[6:40:20] bought fan yeah every stream fresh water limousine 10 sparkle if i can't see you you got something to[6:40:28] hide told me all i ever do is fucking lie release you happy though back to your my mama helped my[6:40:36] daddy back the dope that's real love i'm searching for some real love someone that set my heart free[6:40:44] shot him on the eighth block i hope nobody saw me when his problems call me they know the way my[6:40:50] me[6:40:55] i told you[6:40:57] you know i am you gonna sort him out because he wasn't cool[6:41:20] so[6:41:39] leaving the life[6:41:51] put my hand up on my heart i beat my chest the chaos moving down and down[6:41:55] sleep in my flesh the obstacles won't block my bars i see the test they can try and swap me down[6:42:00] boy i'm the best only know what you see from the outside you can run god last with his mouth wide[6:42:07] i won't die on my knees on my hand side in the end it's a roach versus landslide[6:42:20] me[6:42:28] always thought i was living the life[6:42:31] once i'm feeling it right always thought i was living the life[6:42:39] always[6:42:44] right[6:43:06] thank you thank you i i didn't get to practice this because i got sick[6:43:10] you know we can't get the key light off but i'm gonna do the best that i can[6:43:20] thank you very much thank you thank you thank you thank you[6:43:27] i want to set off alarms deal out the cars smoke cuban cigars and get kicked out of bars before[6:43:36] too but only if it's with you i want to drive down to texas flip off my exes get kind of[6:43:50] reckless to have wild wild wild sex under the moon but only if it's with you i got some baggage[6:44:03] let's do some damage i'm not made for no horsey and carriage you know i'm savage[6:44:11] you're looking past it i want that late night sweet magic that fire for laughing[6:44:18] love but only if it's with you[6:44:26] let's crash wedding tonight get drunk by the lights then i'll pick a fight[6:44:34] on the floor your room but only if it's with you[6:44:43] i want to cut off my hair and kick off my boots dance in the wind just to do it again[6:44:52] it's true but only if it's with you thank you i got some package let's do some damage[6:45:04] i am not made for no horsey and carriage you know i'm savage but you're looking past it[6:45:12] i want that late night sweet magic that fiber laughing i'm kind of crazy because that's how[6:45:20] you make me i don't need jesus because baby you see me i'm gone but only if it's with you[6:45:34] you only with you i forgot the whole shot you only with you[6:45:51] you only with you[6:46:10] another hit show jewels[6:46:20] you[6:46:50] you[6:47:20] you[6:47:50] you